"You told me yours bro…so I guess I'll tell ya mine. My real parents died when I was 5. I don't remember them….like…at all man…it's funny ya know? Tryin to remember them….what they did…how they did it. I do remember one thing though. I remember my mom tellin me to hide. Hide and don't come out till she got me. I remember gun shots and yellin. It…happened a lot….I hid under the bed…in the closet….the gunshots came from my dad….that's it…one day, while I was hidin. A police man called out for me…my mom and dad always told me that they weren't good. An they'd take me away from them if I talked to an officer. So…I didn. He found me though man…he took me to my uncle. I didn know I had an uncle. But I did. And I had to stay with him because he was my only family. My uncle told me my dad had killed my mom…then shot himself. So he told me…cuz I had no more parents…that…that I had to do whatever he said…everything he said…he…I….my uncle….was….a….he raped me…..more than once…..for….3 years…3 years I sat in fuckin fear of this horrible motherfucker…I hated him….I HATED HIM…what did I do…what did I do to deserve this? I didn't do anything…I was just a kid man…just a little kid…with hopes an dreams…well….he did a fuckin good job poundin those outa me….I…I remember sitting by my bed…my hands pressed together….if….if I only could….make a deal with god…but…I couldn't…so…while he was asleep…I snuck into his room….I had a kitchen knife….I slit his throat and ran. I ran as fast as I could as far away as I could. I didn't know how far I ran…I don't remember the town we were in….but…I ended up here…in this town. I found where the gang I'm ins hideout was….I squatted there for….till now…so a motherfuckin long time. The gang found me…an man…they made me their mule. They took me in…they told me I'd be safe as long as I did what they said. If I didn't…they'd kill me…..I was the mule for a long time. Till….I had this thing of….crack…well…it…it was up my ass ok? I'm fuckin ashamed o the shit I was doin…but I wanted to be safe. Anyways. The container broke….it broke and I almost died. Started seizurin on the side of the road. One of the gang members had followed me though. He was goin with me to pop the dealer we were meetin….somthin bout rippin the gang off. The mission failed. I got taken back to the hideout. They fixed me up…then yelled at me for puttin it up wrong…I wasn't allowed to be the mule anymore. So…they had me be their hitman…cuz I was small. Fast. And hell I was smart…I was fuckin smart….even with the drugs I took with the gang….no matter the shit they gave me…I was sharp as a tack…they put me through school. No one caught me…even when I was high. They just thought I was weird. Cuz…what type o 10 year olds high?...hehe…..anyways…I…I've killed people…..lotsa people….for the gang….the police in this town don't pay attention to gang wars….and the John and Jane Does piled up by my hands….this went on till I was 14. I started to get clumsy. Fumblin up missions. My smarts were gone…replaced by addictions and mood swings…they tried to sober me up…but…if you're fuckin raised on that shit…its hard to break yourself from it. I tried….I….mother….fuckin….tried….I'd see these cute lil kids walkin down the street. With their mama in hand. Dressed in their Sunday best….an….an here I am…in some ripped up jeans and some ICP shirt…..I looked awful…I don't even understand their music! I mean seriously what the fuck? Who the fuck cares about magnets?...anyways…I wanted to be a good kid…I wanted to go to school…an…an play with the other kids…an…an not do drugs…the gang told me that I couldn't an that I was too deep in the gang to quit now…I begged them…I begged them for a long time…I'd run outa hope…I'd be this forever…an be one a those John Does in the morgue….at 27….you…you wanna know how the gang celebrates my birthday?...they make me take as many shots as I am old. Then they tell me to go to the worst parta town and tag their sign….they say it keeps me sharp…if I'm caught…I'm not worth their time….anyways…I was…17 in my sophmore year…yeah I got held back a lot…an…I…saw you. The most timid freshman I ever had seen….you were so cute with your shaggy brown hair…then you got cuter when you shaved it and pierced yourself up….I watched ya for a while…tryin to talk to you in class….you'd…you'd just look at me with this terrified look…I'd always get you in detention…..I'd always get you in trouble….I'm sorry….but…then…now…I'm a Senior…I..can actually graduate may be…man…and I'm only..19….hehe….19…I'm gettin old bro….if I stay like this I'm gonna die…I…I've been sober for 5 days now man…an it's killin me….I hurt everywhere….I don't wanna eat…I don't wanna sleep…you…I'm…I'm goin sober for you man….I don't wanna see you hurt…or hurt you anymore than I have….ok? I promise you man…I promise I won't hurt you no more…."
Tavros shook his head and wiped the tears from Gamzee's cheeks," don't make unreal promises. I know you will…and…I'll forgive you. Ok?" Tavros said as he ran his fingers through Gamzee's now dry hair. He smiled kindly at him and cupped his face," I'm glad you're trying to sober up…you know…you can stay here as long as you need to…my doors always open for you."
Gamzee nodded and looked down," I don't deserve it…"
"Yes you do. You've been through hell and back…you deserve some kindness."