After their touching moment in the shower, Gamzee dried his hair, shaved and got dressed again. He reached for the face paint on the counter, but was stopped by a pale hand.
"He's not going to like kissing face paint Gamzee." Karkat said in a soft tone. He knew Gamzee was going out. The Juggalo had shaved. Most of the time Gamzee just let his blond stubble grow in, not bothering with it for weeks on end. He only really bothered when he was trying to impress someone, or look less like a hobo.
Gamzee nodded and let the paint go," do I up and smell ok?" Gamzee asked as he tugged the t-shirt he wore in a flustered manner.
Karkat laughed," Gamzee you always smell bad.
The teen's brows furrowed.
"KIDDING! Jeez get a sense of humor. You smell fine asswipe." Karkat said with a smirk, walking out of the bathroom, still stark naked.
The corners of Gamzee's mouth turned up slightly as he left the bathroom. He tugged his shoes on and left the apartment, leaving the lovers to their activities.
Eyes glue to the ground, Gamzee followed his feet to the bookstore, figuring Tavros would be there. Where else would he be? At the store….maybe he should go back….
Gamzee turned about face and began to walk back to Karkat and Sollux's apartment. He stopped himself though and did a 180, almost stomping off to the bookstore. He was determined. He could do this. He was strong.
"Hey. Gamzee! Wwhy haven't I seen you at school?" A familiar and rather nasally voice called from behind him.
Gamzee rolled his eyes as high as they could go and he turned around," hey motherfucker. Just didn't want to go and all." He said, lifting his eyes from the ground to look the hipster over.
Eridan stood, leaned against a telephone pole, his pompous scarf tossed nonchalantly over one shoulder. An arrogant smirk adorned his face. Gamzee couldn't stand him. His stupid thick glasses, his stupid streaked hair, his stupid green eyes, his stupid scarf, his stupid shoes, his stupid face. Gamzee hated it all. He had almost punched the asshole on many occasions. Once, he actually did. It was in math class.
Eridan was babbling on and on and on about how Gamzee should shower and how he himself had miraculous hygiene and blah blah blah. The fact of the matter is; Gamzee punched him. Broke his glasses and gave the teen a black eye for two weeks. Gamzee got suspended for a week for that.
He didn't regret hitting the other boy though. In fact, most of their group wanted to hit him. Especially Sollux. Eridan on multiple occasions sexually harassed Sollux in the dressing room. I.E. snapping his ass with a towel. The two even went out for a week. Sollux, by the end of the week wanted to strangle him with his scarf.
He was needy, whiny, clingy, passive aggressive and his accent was weird. Normally his accent was tolerable. Put it in a sexual context though. Sollux whined to Feferi for hours how," oh god Sollux please don't stop oh god nyeh ah Sollux keep doin that oh god that's really good nyeh." Got really, REALLY annoying. Feferi had told Aradia, who had told Karkat, who had told Gamzee. Gamzee gagged when he heard it because then he pictured the dumb hipster naked and under someone. That thought would forever be burned into his mind.
In reality, and outside of everyone's skewed opinions, according to Eridan himself, he was a lovable boy who just wanted someone to cuddle with. Honestly, Eridan wouldn't be all that bad, handsome and sweet even, if he would get some self-confidence and give himself a chance. Eridan had always been handed everything. His father was rich and basically raised Eridan with a silver spoon in his mouth.
The only problem was: this love was entirely conditional. Eridan had to be perfect, flawless in the eyes of his father. He had to do sports and get straight A's. Eridan wasn't the most colorful spoon in the toolshed though. In other words, his intelligence was probably the most average in the group. He struggled with the simplest of math. He almost blew up the science lab during chemistry class and couldn't write an essay to save his life.
He also was very un-athletic. This wasn't his fault though. Eridan had chronic lung problems due to his father. Eridan's father had smoked around him since he was born. Eridan had, over time, developed a rather surprisingly severe case of emphysema. Topped with hereditary asthma the boy didn't stand a chance with sports. He tried. Oh he worked his little heart out at everything.
In football, he not only got 3 concussions, but broke a leg and an arm. In soccer he somehow kicked himself in the face, knocking himself unconscious. In track and field he threw his arm out doing shot put and javelin throwing. He couldn't run. He hardly could lift weights and his sight was so bad he could hardly track a tennis ball and even though he couldn't swim, he tried out for the swim team. He almost drowned. It was as if this kid was cursed from birth.
Being born of a hooker this was understandable. His father liked to fuck around and Eridan was the product of his misdemeanors. He still had hope though and everyday he'd get up from bed. Dress in his pathetic clothes with his pathetic scarf and pathetically thick glasses. He'd go into his bathroom and fix his hair and try to smile at himself. Try to tell himself that he was loved and wanted, but when he'd go to school he was the friend no one liked. Everyone just kept him around for a good laugh. Oh haha look at the pathetic hipster dude. No one loves him.
No one would give him a chance. When they did, he was so scared that he'd fuck up, so scared that they were only doing it to humor him. He'd give them gifts and give them tender kisses and write them poetry. This was written off as needy and clingy though. He couldn't do anything right. Nothing.
Depression, for him, was replaced by bitterness and arrogance. He started hating the world. His hope left him and all he wanted was to see the world with his "friends" burn.
"Wwell you should really go. I miss talkin to ya man. You wwere one of the feww that I actually liked." Eridan said smiling more sincerely. He straightened up and began to walk over.
Oh god. No. Don't come over here. He likes me? Fuck. Fuck fuck fuck go away motherfucker," hey man I'm kinda in a hurry." Gamzee said, gritting his teeth as Eridan approached.
"Aww really? I thought you an me could go get food or somethin, I'm payin!" Eridan offered, desperate for any attention from the last person who was vaguely nice to him.
"No man I mean seriously I'm in a motherfucking hurry." Gamzee said, starting to back away.
Eridan continued to approach though," please? My treat…I mean seriously we haven't seen each other in wwhat seems like forever!" Eridan begged, his smile starting to fade. He finally stopped and looked at his shoes," you don't wwant to hang out with me do you?"
Gamzee stopped backing away and looked over the boy in front of him," no. I..uh really don't motherfucker. No offense man but you kinda weird me out." Gamzee stated.
"Oh. Wwell then. I uh…Ok…I suppose…yeah…sorry then…" Eridan managed to barely choke out the last couple words. His hands shook and his tears fell onto his thick glasses.
Gamzee rubbed the back of his head, shit," shit man I didn't mean to upset ya! Hey it'll be ok. Why don't you hang out with Feferi?" Gamzee offered, trying to brighten the subject.
"She told me I wwas a disgrace and that she nevver wwanted to see my stupid face again." Eridan stated. In his bag, was his graduation cap. Today was graduation. He was an adult now. As a graduation present, Feferi finally let him have it.
"Oh. Uh well how bout…uh….Equius?"
"Broke three of my fingers last month an told me to stop rough housin wwith him. He told me it wwould be best if wwe didn't speak anymore."
"Oh. Uh Nepeta?"
"She hates me. She told me I smelled like a gym sock at the beginnin of the year and said I should leave evveryone alone."
"Ah. Uh how bout Vriska! You two had a thing didn't ya?"
"HA! Fat chance man. She set my car on fire at my house wwhen she broke up wwith me."
"Oh…Aradia? Tavros? Kanaya? Terezi! Terezi likes everyone!"
"Aradia doesn't speak to anyone, especially me. Who's Tavros? Kanaya hates my fashion sense an told me to drop dead. Terezi….it's complicated. She doesn't wwant me around either."
Gamzee rubbed the bridge of his nose as he looked over the pathetic teen," well shit man…uh…Karkat? Sollux?"
"…..wwhat the hell do you think?" Eridan asked, raising his head to look at the juggalo.
"….oh….shit man…you're kinda putting me on the spot here! And no offence dude but I don't really want to hang out with you either. Not right now at least!"
"Not now. Not evver." Eridan's tone wavered as his green eyes searched Gamzee for an answer to it all. Why? Why him? Why did no one like him? He tried so hard. He kept trying too. Kept trying to be that friend that everyone loves, that everyone goes to. Tears streaked down his face and he clenched his jaw," fine. I'll just fuckin leavve evveryone the hell alone! No one wwants to fuckin be around me anywways. Wwhy the fuck do I evven exist?" Eridan yelled at Gamzee.
Gamzee rubbed the back of his head, why did he always have to put up with the nutters of the group? He was starting to get pissed. His eyes panned over the pathetic hipster in front of him an apparent look of disgust on his face. His face and heart fell though, when Eridan did something he didn't expect.
Eridan, in one smooth motion pulled a gun from his bag, and pointed it at Gamzee. He had fallen into hysterics. His breathing was rough as his asthma kicked in, clenching his throat shut.
"WOAH MAN! DON'T FUCKING POINT THAT AT ME! WHY THE FUCK DO YOU HAVE TO ACT LIKE SUCH A GOD DAMN PRICK?" Gamzee yelled, standing his ground, this wasn't the first time he'd had a gun pointed at him; he knew how to handle this. He knew Eridan didn't have the guts to pull the trigger.
"Fine." What happened next, Gamzee wasn't prepared for. He had never witnessed this.
Eridan pulled the gun away from pointing at Gamzee and instead, pressed it into his own mouth. His entire form shaking.
For one last moment green met blue. A desperate, disgraced, defeated look crossed Eridan's eyes and at that, he pulled the trigger.