Disclaimer: I Do not own Bleach.
Just cleaned this up and added some stuff, reread if you like ;)...
(I dedicate Ron Pope's You're the Reason I come home. Sigh... I know, it's perfect. ; ) )
A/N: Well helllooooo... I'm back as promised! Please review, I need them like the air I breathe. Well, this fanfic need your reviews to live, to continue. Hitsuhina is so adorable. Sigh. Review please and don't forget to mention favorite parts. :)
And thank you, thank you for reviewing! I know who you all are. I check it periodically.
WATASHI NO KOKORO
Chapter 27
Fall
…...
"Im sorry, I'm late Shiro-chan."
Her face flushed from flash stepping to the restaurant. He expected her to be late, so he had already ordered dinner for the both of them. He shook his head, indicating that it's no big deal. She smiled and thanked the waiter who offered to remove her cloak. Then Hitsugaya amusedly watched as she flopped down to sit in front of him. Her bangs fluttered as she let out a puff of air, "Phew!" and grinned.
He chuckled. Relieved to see her cheeks naturally tinged with the usual pink, and her face back to its healthy glow. But he still insists on having her checked...
"What?"
"Nothing. You never changed."
She stuck her tongue out before sipping her tea.
It was well into their second course when Hinamori asked, "Shiro-chan...when are we to train again? It's been three weeks since the wedding..." Referring to the promise he made to help her better her bankai.
He cleared his throat. "...Why were you late coming here?"
Momo sighed. She got the hint. Knowing full well what his true reasons are for delaying their training sessions. Though in no mood to strike up an argument, she responded, "I had to drop something off..."
...
So that's what she had to drop off.
"Momo..."
They were under the covers, each on their own side of the bed; both lying naked on their stomachs while facing each other.
"Yes, Toushiro?" Still a little breathless, reeling from had just finished making love.
"Thank you for my 'belated' birthday gift. Although you really didn't have to, baka."
"Hmm...I can always give it to Abarai-taicho. He was drooling all over it."
He laughed. "Right. And how did you get it over here?"
She smiled when he laughed. His dimples are so adorable... "With Yourichi-san and Uruhara-san's help. And it was late getting here because it took awhile to make a motor that would run on spirit particles instead of gas." Recalling how excited the shop owner got when Momo revealed the challenge of acquiring such a gift for the young captain's birthday. The bike looked similar to the one she drove, but it was said to be the newest model.
"I see... thank you again, Hinamori." He kissed her fingers.
"You're welcome." She yawned. "Goodnight, my love."
"Goodnight."
...
...
The next day...
Momo was organizing the files of paperwork on the shelves behind her desk when her captain broke the silence, "Oi, Hinamori-san...I wanted to ask-"
"That's Hitsugaya-fukutaicho by the way." She said without stopping to look his way.
Renji felt foolish when she corrected him, and scratched the back of his head. "Oh, sorry I forgot. Its just that I've always known you as Hinamori."
She laughed. "I'm just kidding Abarai-kun! Geez. I'm not like Toushiro, who always insist on 'Hitsugaya-taicho'." Deepening her voice at the end; a poor attempt at that. "So... what is it you wanted to ask?"
"Oh. Hehe. It's kind of random...I wasn't sure if you'd be comfortable to talk about it..."
"Try me."
"Your bankai isn't this big secret, is it?" Momo resumed back to her project while answering her taicho's question.
"Nope. Didn't really know I was achieving one, and there were witnesses so I didn't really have a choice if I did want it to be a secret or not." She shrugged.
"Was it that unstable that you declined the captain seat?"
She stopped what she was doing and faced her good friend, who finally is back to his normal self once he overcame the expectations as the new 5th Division captain. He leaves his long red hair untied more often now, making him look older and...refined. Momo held in a smile as she remembered him being so frustrated with the bottomless stacks of reports, that he unceremoniously took off the hair tie; flinging it off alongside with his bandana - then just stopped wearing it altogether. It also helped to have Rukia around and tease him about being a captain almost everyday. She kept him grounded and level headed.
"Yes, very unstable. But it's not the sole reason why I declined it...eto...I'm not really captain material."
"I say you are. You kept this division like a well-oiled machine the past three years, Hinamori."
"Thank you, Abarai-Kun. But no, I'm really not."
"Oi, Let's make a deal. I'll help you with your bankai and you help me with my kidou. What say you Hinamori-san?"
"Really? I would greatly appreciate that." Ecstatic at the idea, but stopped for she felt guilty training with someone else other than Toushiro. But this is my taicho we're talking about so it should be okay... I think.
...
"Momo-chaan!" Rangiku immediately stood up. Glad for the interruption and taking note of how nice it looks to see her friend wearing a ponytail instead of that bun.
"Hello Rangiku-san. Where's your taicho?" Hinamori asked, a little disappointed to have missed her husband. But brightened up to see her friend and made her way to sit in Toushiro's desk.
"I honestly don't know. They got him doing all sorts of stuff. So...how's it going over there with Abarai-taicho?"
"Great. That's why I actually needed to talk to Shiro-chan about. But since you're here, I've been meaning to ask you..."
Happy to finally be able to leisurely talk to her friend, "Ask me about what Momo-chan?"
"Do you know who Kurosaki Karin is? I just know she's Ichigo-kun's sister..." She asked, fiddling with his pen.
"Oh she's that tomboy twin, or she used to be. Karin is an avid soccer player. It was that one day taicho saw her team was losing, while Karin got hurt and still continued to play. He stepped in and saved the match. Hollow and all! Oh, and or Karin's team would have been eating spaghetti through their noses! Haha! Taicho and her have been good friends ever since. Ehhh...why you ask?" Matsomoto noticed that Hinamori looked a little uncomfortable.
"I...was just wondering. Eto...he never mentioned her to me." Momo blushed, feeling hurt at the realization.
"Taicho hardly mentions anything at all, you know that. They're just good friends and nothing more. I think Karin reminded him a little bit of himself and he feels like they have much in common..."
"But she almost had tears in her eyes when she found out I was his wife, Rangiku-san." Hinamori couldn't help but blurt out. She started to feel the pang of her insecurities.
"Now Momo-chan, you realized I'm just talking about taicho's side of things here, and I'm telling you they're just friends. And as for Karin, whether she had feelings for taicho or not is really none of our concern is it? For it will not be returned, I can assure you."
"She just looked so crushed. It was so heartbreaking that it made me think maybe there was something going on." Hinamori was very upset at this point. Her head started to hurt. "Ugh..now I have a headache. Great."
"Geez. Are you okay? You should ask him about these things first before you get yourself all worked up."
"I'm fine. I'm sorry Rangiku-san, I just overreacted. It's just that...ano...tsk." She stopped massaging her temples, and bowed her head.
"It's just what?"
"..."
"Tell me, Momo."
"I just feel so undeserving at times, and so...ugly." On the verge of tears now; too embarrassed to look Matsumoto in the eyes.
"Oi Momo-chan," she walked over and got on her knees to hug Hinamori, "why do you think of such things? You know better."
"I do?"
"You don't look at yourself in the mirror? And you are married to a very handsome man who will do anything for you-"
"Which I really don't deserve..."
Wow, Aizen did wonders on you, girl. Thought Rangiku as the hatred towards the men who betrayed Sereitei, that she had tried hard to suppress, emerged once again.
"Shhh...you are being ridiculous. You are beautiful. A great man like my taicho doesn't deserve anything less." She winked and forced a smile for her friend.
Hitsugaya abruptly slid the doors open to witness his wife and lieutenant behind his desk. Momo seemed embarrassed as she stood up and wiped the tears from her eyes pretending to look out the window, while Rangiku looked agitated. What the hell?
"What's-"
Matsumoto loudly sighed. I need to take a walk. "Im going to lunch now, taicho. I'll send up for some tea, it'll help with the headache Momo-chan." Glancing at Hinamori before closing the door behind her.
"Oi, are you okay?" He was standing in front of her now, his hand immediately on her forehead.
Damn...stupid tears. Thought I have cried you all out by now. "Yes. It's fine, Shiro-chan. It'll go away-"
"Let me help..." He had her sit on top of his desk, while his hand returned to touching her forehead, "it might start to feel a little cold."
She felt his reiatsu flow through her head, numbing the pain. Momo sighed. "Toushiro...you're amazing. Thank you." She opened her eyes to his crooked smile and kissed the palm of his hand, leaning her cheek into it. "Can I ask you something?"
He nodded.
"Abarai-taicho offered to train with me-"
His smile disappeared. "No."
"Shiro-chan, he's my captain. I have to adhere-"
"You said it was an offer. I was under the impression you can accept or decline it. Otherwise, I can just discuss it with him later."
Hinamori mustered all the control to hold on to her temper. "Let me make you a deal then, Shiro-chan." He raised an eyebrow. Curious now.
"I'll have myself checked by the 4th Division, but only before you agree to train with me again...and I want to train with Abarai-kun too."
"And what if it turns out you're really...not well, Momo. What then?" He couldn't bring himself to say the word sick.
"Then I'll just get better." Duh, genious. Optimistic because she never felt healthier.
He sighed. "Deal." A little wary of this proposition for some reason. But anything to get her to go to the healing department.
Momo reached up, holding him by front of his haori to steal a quick kiss. "Thank you!" Happily grinning. He couldn't help but smile back, though still a little concerned.
"Why were you crying?"
She shrugged. "Oh you know, girl stuff."
...
….
On the same day, just after lunch...
"Don't just focus on the target, focus on your control...yes, almost there...now."
"...Hadouno 33: Soukatsui!" The target disintegrated by the blue flame.
Renji's smile couldn't be contained. "Yoshi!...The hard part is remembering the chant, I kept biting my stupid tongue."
Momo had to laugh. "You'll get the hang of it Abarai-kun. And after a while you won't need to say all of it anymore. It's all in here." She tapped her temple with her index finger.
"How do you guys do it without having to chant? Boggles my mind."
"Just keep practicing and let me know when you're ready to move on to the 40's and 50's level." The both of them started to walk towards the office.
"Damn. I have a lot of memorizing to do...so how about that bankai, Hinamori-san. Aren't we going to work on it today?"
"Uhmm...I don't think it's a good idea Abarai-kun. I...I tend to pass out everytime. It makes Shiro-chan uneasy."
Renji just shrugged. "I did too, it's normal. Ask Madarame, he had to wait around for me to gain conciousness in the middle of our spars."
"Ask me what?" Ikkaku was suddenly behind them.
"How I would black out during my bankai the first few times."
"Heh! He knocked the fuck out!"
"Really?" She felt a little guilty for being utterly relieved to hear such news. So I'm not the only one...
As if he read his lieutenant's mind, "Hardly anyone talks about their bankai, or in some cases, they just don't want people to know about it. So no one really knows what to expect, Hinamori-san. It's different for everybody." Renji explained.
"I see. In that case...yes! Let's do it." She eagerly said, and headed towards the training ground's walls.
"What are you doing?" Abarai asked, while they curiously watched her silently set up bakudo barriers.
"Masking the place, so Toushiro won't freak out when he feels my reiatsu flare."
"Oh...uhh...are you sure you're ok with this Hinamori-san?" Renji ascertained.
"As long as you and Ikkaku-kun promise not to take me to the 4th division everytime I faint."
"Hai. 4th Division are for sissies."
"Good. Then here we go." She unsheathed Tobiume. Momo felt her zanpaktou's excitement as she summoned it with complete confidence.
"Bankai."
...
"Oi Renji, she's been out for ten minutes. Is she going to be all right?" Ikkaku worriedly asked as he held Momo's limp form in his arms; her hair now undone.
"Yes. She'll come around. Place her on the couch...thank you, Madarame." Holy shit, her reiatsu sky rocketed right before she fainted. It singed a portion of his hakama. Reminding Renji of the soutaicho's fire-type zanpaktou; although not as prominent but still staggeringly impressive.
Madarame was thinking the same thing. This little slip of a girl is capable of doing all that damage? It's insane. He looked behind at Abarai making sure his friend is not watching, before brushing off the hair that obstructed her small porcelain face, and lightly traced the back of his fingers on her cheek. So delicate and yet...terrifying. What a deadly combination.
"She needs to wake up soon or I'm bringing her over to Unohana." Renji was pacing in front of his desk, worried now. She's been out for 15 minutes and not looking forward to explaining it to her husband.
And slowly as if on queue, Hinamori opened her eyes to Ikkaku's concerned face. She held his hand then smiled; gratefully looking up at him. His heart skipping a beat, "Thank you, for not taking me to the 4th division."
"Anytime."
"Let's go again."
...
...
It was 9pm...
"You're late, Momo." Hitsugaya was still in his office and didn't look up from his desk when she entered the room. He decided to just finish up some more paperwork when his wife didn't turn up as expected.
"I'm sorry...I got delayed at the division."
"You did say that everything was now caught up and to expect you every night by 7pm from then on. There are also phones, Hinamori, to tell me that you'll be late."
"I remember what I said, Toushiro. No need to repeat it. I also just said I'm sorry for being late."
"Did it have something to do with your reiatsu disappearing right after lunch today?" He stopped writing and looked her straight in the eyes.
"No. But I'm tired. Please excuse me, I have to go to bed."
He already had figured it out before he was left staring at the door. Tch. She's been training with Abarai...
...
Toushiro finally came in the room to find her on the bed reading a book and hugging her chappy doll. Ignoring him while he dressed to sleep; even when he lied down next to her. He stared up at the ceiling, lost in his thoughts. It was silent for a while...
"Shiro-chan..."
"Yes?"
"Will you come with me to the 4th division first thing tomorrow?"
"Of course."
"You're not still mad at me are you?"
"I should be. But I realized it wasn't my place to meddle, it was between Abarai-taicho and you." He rolled on his side to see Momo biting one of the doll's ear – a picture of pure innocence. And who can be mad at that? His lips twitched.
"You know taicho fainted too when he first achieved bankai?"
"Is that so?"
"Yes. And as it turns out, it's perfectly normal to pass out the first few times. See Shiro-chan? I'm ok. Actually, I'm better than ok." In fact, today, she stayed in her bankai form for an hour before losing conciousness again- - though careful to leave that small detail out.
"Are you trying to wriggle out of going to the hospital tomorrow?"
"No, of course not. What I'm trying to say is that I'm fine enough to start training with you again."
He cocked a brow. Train with both me and Abarai?
"Ah. We'll see..."
...
Hitsugaya woke up feeling unusually cold to find her side of the bed empty, and the balcony doors open. He immediately wanted to see what she's doing out in the snow at this time of night. The balcony was also empty but he can see her standing by the edge of the roof; the full moon silhouetted her form. Momo's back was facing towards him as her long hair and the hem of her yukata swayed against the gentle winter breeze.
"Hinamori?" She didn't turn around. She was still. Too eerily still.
"Oi..." He reached for her shoulder.
Her whole body was frozen. And the touch on her back was the only push it needed to make her fall off the roof. Her body shattered in the tiniest of pieces the second it hit the ground. Toushiro couldn't move or do anything – but just watched in slow motion...
Momo woke up to her teeth chattering. Why is it so cold? She looked around, all the windows and doors are closed. But then felt the familiar reiatsu that encompassed the room. Toushiro was on his side facing her, his hand clutching the sheet. His brows twitched; breath frosted and uneven.
"No..." She heard him whisper.
He's having a bad dream. Momo touched his arm, "Shiro-chan? Wake up."
She gasped when he suddenly held her wrist. His eyes were now open, though they seemed a little confused and...terrified. Hinamori knew that he wasn't quite awake yet to see the turquoise orbs so unguarded.
"Shiro-chan...it's me." Her other hand reached to touch his face.
She watched as his eyes slowly came into cognition and at the same time felt the freezing pressure ebb away. Toushiro closed his eyes again and gathered her in his arms as he lied back down; holding her in place underneath him. With his ear against her chest he sighed, and just listened. For each beat warmly filled the cold, empty void that had set in.
"Are you alright?" Momo asked while her hand gently combed back his soft white hair.
He just nodded. Holding her tighter. They stayed motionless for awhile...
Until she felt him unfasten her yukata and captured her mouth in a relentless and fervent kiss, leaving her panting for more. Hinamori felt the urgency in his touch, his hand going over her face as if needing to make sure it's really her; that she's really there. It felt...desperate. She in turn assured him by responding with the same ardor.
...
The distinct flutter of a hell butterfly's wings alerted Hitsugaya. It was still dark outside.
An emergency captains' meeting.
The dream was still fresh in his mind, as he kept looking back over his shoulder checking on her sleeping form while he dressed. Toushiro kneeled on Momo's side of the bed and tucked the hair away from her face. He gently placed a hand over her warm chest; comforted by the soft thuds of her heart... My heart.
…...
A/N: Please review. Chapter 28 on the works. Please mention favorite parts :) Please review.