thank you all for being so patient with me!

For once, Tavros' noisy mind was quiet. He thought of nothing as he stared at his juggalo friend; after 30 minutes of dragging and grunting, Tavros managed to get him inside and onto his bed.

So now he stared, unsure of weather to wake the boy up or just let him stay passed out.

Slowly he twiddled his thumbs; the smallest bead of sweat worked its way down the side of his head. His lower lip quivered and his eyelashes fluttered.

Finally the thoughts came, flooding into his brain; consuming anything that was there before.

His twiddling increased and he quickly began to worry his lip in-between his teeth. What should he do? Wake him up, kick him out, wake him up, let him sleep, leave him there, get Rosa.

Tavros choked back tears as he bit his lip harder. He wanted to fix things, He felt like he needed to fix things. He still cared about Gamzee, and it was obvious that the taller boy still cared about him. He just, didn't want to be hurt again. He was in to fragile a state for someone to trample all over him like Gamzee had done before.

The mohawked boy's thoughts traveled away from the negative for a second though as he remembered, however short, the good times. Gamzee getting him Rufio the fish (who still swam happily in circles, around the bowl that sat on the nightstand.), the blue flowers, the times Gamzee stayed up with him, sat with him, cheered him up.

Though the bad times still stung in Tavros' eyes, weighed on his soul and kept him up at night. He couldn't just forget what had happened. He couldn't just let everything go in one big acceptance speech. He needed to talk to him. Tell Gamzee his grievances.

But how?

Would he listen? Would he actually take the time to consider someone other than himself? What if he did? Would they go back to normal? Would they go back to being the same way they had been? Or would Gamzee still prove to be the unreliable drug addict he had been in the past? Was he really the bad guy?

Tavros pushed all the thoughts from his head and wiped his eyes. He slowly took a deep breath and reached out to Gamzee, shaking him gently," Gamzee….um…hey…Gamzee? You...um…feeling ok?" Tavros asked in a soft tone as he gingerly brushed the juggalo's hair out of his face.

Gamzee let out a groan as he sluggishly lifted his hand to his head," fucking hell. I am never up an pissing that girl off again. Fuck." Gamzee pulled his hand away and looked at the blood on his hand," shit…bro…can you do me a favor and get me a wet towel or something?"

Tavros nodded and wheeled his chair to the bathroom, quickly returning with a moist towel for his friend.

Gamzee smiled a little and took it from him. Slowly he dabbed the spot with it, hissing a little at the pain," ow fuck. Well I think besides the skin, she didn't do much damage. But shit bro…she hit me hard."

Tavros nodded as he looked over the spot, it was already turning a lovely purple color now that the blood was wiped away. It looked painful," do you…um...feel ok?"

"As good as I'll ever be with a giant motherfucking goose egg on my head." Gamzee groaned as he handed the towel back to Tavros.

Tavros picked it from Gamzee's hand, dangling it out away from him, his nose wrinkled a little. He didn't like blood much. He quickly disposed of it in the hamper across the room. He quickly rolled back to Gamzee, his eyes fixed on him as the juggalo sat up.

"So…we get to finish our talk?" Gamzee ask as he turned his lazy eyes to look at Tavros.

"Yeah…I guess so…" Tavros mumbled as he began to twiddle and fidget his thumbs again.

There was a moment of silence as they both waited for each other to speak, both of their mouths slightly open as they stared at the ground. Waiting. The air was thick with their tension. They both listened to the clock on the wall, each other's breath, the soft splash of water from Rufio's bowl.

Gamzee quickly took the initiative, for he knew that Tavros could never really start a serious conversation and he didn't want to burden the poor thing with that, "Well…what should we do bro? I…want to fix things…like…up and go back to the way we were. I…I know it'll never really be the same you know? There will still be that shit we both had to wade through. Just waitin for us there. Up and rearing its motherfucking head when we fight." Gamzee lifted his eyes from the floor and looked at Tavros," but I think we can do it…I think we could overcome this…if…if it's ok with you. I…I know I can. I feel like a shit head asking for this. I'm just….so sorry. I'm so sorry I put you through this….I…I didn't fucking mean for this to happen…I just….fuck…I just ruin everything I touch…I didn't ask for that though. I really just want to show you how much I care. I want to prove to you that I can be your friend and your partner. I want you to see that I do care and that I need you…but I don't expect you to accept me apology…I wronged you bro. I really did."

There was a pause, where they both listened to the sound of the world slowly turn under them. It felt like a century waiting for Tavros to reply. Waiting for him to decide.

Tavros took in a shallow shaky breath as he lifted his eyes from the floor as well. He locked them with Gamzee's and said in probably the smallest voice you'd ever hear," I forgive you."