A/N:
Hey, guys! Here's your promised weekly update! =) Sorry it's a bit shorter than usual, but I promise next weeks chapter will be longer. Thanks for all the amazing reviews! Also, I just want to wish Miss Roz Hay a Happy Birthday! Enjoy & see you all next week! =)
Disclaimer: I do not, in any way, profit from this story and all creative rights to the characters belong to Richelle Mead.
The original content, ideas and intellectual property of this story are owned by Ms. Belikov. Please do not copy, reproduce, or translate without express written permission.
RPOV:
Beep. Beep. Beep. Beep.
"That's really annoying..." I groaned. "Turn off the alarm clock. I don't care if I'm late for practice today. Dimitri can kiss my ass."
There was a soft chuckle, and warmth spread through me. "Good to have you back, Rose."
I opened my eyes. "Ugh! Close the drapes, too! The sun is blinding!"
A large dark form came towards me, blocking out some of the bright lights. I blinked a few times until my vision was cleared.
"Good morning, good lookin'." I smiled, comforted by his presence. "Mmmm...how I love a man in uniform."
"Would you like some water?"
"Yes, please." I croaked. "My throat feels like sandpaper."
Dimitri handed me a cup and stared down at me. "How are you feeling?"
"Like I got ran over by a diesel truck," I said, lifting the cup to my lips. I noticed I'd pulled on something, and glanced down. It was an IV taped to my hand. I looked around me. There were all sorts of things attached to me - like a billion IV's, a pincher thing on my finger that was flashing red, a heart monitor.
"I'm in a frickin' hospital." I realized, and then it slammed into me like a freight train. I had the urge to scream. To hit someone. To throw things. To bawl like a baby.
But instead I began ripping needles from my body. Pluck. Pluck. Pluck. The machines went berserk.
"Are you out of your damn mind?" Dimitri growled, forcing me back down.
"Let go of me!" I snarled, fighting against him. It was impossible, like trying to roll a boulder off of me. "I have to get out of here! I have to find Ambrose, now! He killed Tasha!"
Dimitri replied crisply, "You were shot in the chest, and the bullet missed your heart by a millimeter. You lost so much blood your body required three transfusions. You barely survived multiple emergency surgeries. You've been out cold for a week. And now you want to pull this shit? Calm the fuck down."
His words shocked me for a moment as they settled in. However, I didn't matter. All I cared about was Tasha. She deserved justice. And so did Mason.
"Where is Ambrose?"
"In custody."
A sense of relief washed over me, so overpowering and consuming all I could do was hug Dimitri so hard. And then I stuffed my face in his shoulder and cried. Not just normal crying, where you shed a couple of tears here and there. I'm talking about full blown, red faced, sobbing, crying so hard you can't hardly breathe. We stayed like that, just holding each other, until I had no tears left in me.
Dimitri pulled back, looked at me for a long moment, then kissed my forehead. "I wish I knew how to express to you how sorry I am."
"It doesn't matter now." My voice was raw, like I'd swallowed a bucket of sand. "What's done is done. Where did you find Ambrose?"
"Near the back of his home. Hiding in the woods."
"Figures. What a coward." I muttered. "I'm so tired. I just want to go to sleep now. But I want to make sure you caught him."
Something flashed in his eyes as he stood up. "You don't trust me?"
I shook my head. "No. That's not it. I just have to see it for myself, you know? I don't think I'll be able to sleep if I don't."
"Here..." Dimitri walked over, picked up a file, and slid something out of it. He handed it to me. "This is his booking photograph."
"Dimitri," I said, feeling like I was going to be sick. "This isn't him. It's Dominic, his older brother. You caught the wrong guy, and Ambrose is still out there."
It was a classic case of, 'If I can't have you, then no one can.' I couldn't believe it had been over a week ago that Tasha had been kidnapped then murdered by the only man she had ever loved. My every waking thought was consumed with Tasha. She was all my mind could concentrate on. I saw her face every time I closed my eyes. The dreams of her haunted me.
Today was Tasha's funeral.
I dressed accordingly in a black dress to hide the bandage over my chest, a hat to cover the line of stitches on my temples, and glasses to mask the deep black circles that had developed due to my nonexistent sleep schedule. I still felt the same way I did on the inside - dead.
The entire academy, including recruits and instructors, along with a very small portion of Tasha's family - the ones that had actually given a damn about her - attended the ceremony.
It was shocking how it was possible to feel like this. I was numb to the core. My feelings were there - the sadness, the heartache, the loss, the longing to have Tasha back - but they were so drowned out by all the anger I felt they might as well have not been there at all.
The whole funeral went by in a blur, and I didn't pay attention to what was said or who cried or anything of that nature. But I remember, at the very end, when they were about to lower her body into the earth, something Pavel did that gave me chills.
He walked up to Tasha's casket, stared at it for a long moment, then pulled out a badge from his pocket and set it on top of her resting place. It was his way of making her a cop, of showing that even though she was no longer here, she still accomplished great things in her life and absolutely deserved the honor of receiving a badge.
As Tasha was laid to rest and the music played, I said a small prayer and blew her a final kiss goodbye.
It broke my heart to know that she had been taken away so soon and so suddenly, but at least I had the peace of mind knowing that she no longer had to be put through the living hell that was Ambrose. She no longer had to live in constant fear of a man who believed he had owned her. Tasha was where she was supposed to be now. She could forever rest quietly in her place in heaven. Exactly where an angel like her belonged.
"Congratulations, Rose." Dimitri said, as he presented me with my badge. "You did it."
"Thanks." I managed a smile, as pictures were taken.
I stepped down and joined Lissa. "Hey, partner."
"Can you believe it? We graduated! We're totally cops now!" Lissa squeezed me in a hug that was full of love. "I'm so proud of you."
"I'm even prouder of you." I told her. "We're going to be the most badass motherfuckers around here."
Lissa let out a small laugh and bumped fists with me. "Love you, sis."
"I love you, too."
"He's going to run." Lissa said.
"No, he's not." I replied, staring at the man who stared right back at me. He wasn't very tall, maybe five-foot-seven or eight. Shaved head. Covered in tattoos. His eyes were black. Total junkie.
"Bet you five bucks he will - oh, looks like you owe me five bucks." Lissa hopped in the squad car. She was a fantastic driver. And I was the fantastic runner.
I took off after him.
"Damn, for being on the chunkier side, you can run pretty damn fast!" I panted, as I pursued him.
He had robbed a local gas station and gotten away with a measly thirty-five dollars. Despite remembering all the times I had been in his exact position, where I had been so desperate for money and food that I had resorted to stealing to get by, I had a very hard time finding an ounce of sympathy. He had the power to change his situation, to do something with his life, but he made the decision to take the easy route out and take from people who worked their butt off and earned their living.
The police car roared beside us as my new partner trailed us.
The man climbed over a fence like some spider monkey and hopped down. I was right behind him. He whipped down an alley.
"Got you now, bitch!"
At the very end of the alley, Lissa hit the brakes. He slammed into the hood of the car, and I smashed against him. We both grunted at the impact.
"You have the right to remain silent." I panted. "Anything you do or say can and will be held against you in a court of law..."
As I read him off the Miranda rights, I cuffed him and shoved him into the back of the police vehicle. I couldn't believe I was saying the same words Dimitri had to me the day he'd met and arrested me all those months ago. It was incredible how far I had come, how much I had changed, how strong I had become on a physical and mental level. No one could take this away from me - I had earned it with my own sweat, blood, and the rare tear.
"You're telling me it's been over a month since Ambrose murdered Tasha, and you still have no clue regarding his whereabouts."
"That's exactly what I'm saying, Rose." Dimitri pressed his fists against his desk and leaned forward, eyes daring me to challenge him. "How many times do I have to repeat myself before you can comprehend this situation?"
"Maybe if you actually did your job and gave me some fucking answers, it would make more sense to me."
His eyes flashed. "I would watch the way you speak to me, Hathaway. Don't forget your place."
"I can't just stand here and do nothing, Dimitri! I feel like I'm losing my mind." I confessed, rubbing the smooth scar over my heart. "It's like my brain won't allow me to understand all of this. I miss Tasha so much. I would give anything to trade places with her. She deserves to be here. I don't."
"You have a purpose, and there's a reason you beat all odds on that operating table and survived. You are meant to be here, Rose. Don't ever question that."
Turning around, I stared beyond the blinds of Dimitri's office. It was late and the police station was mostly dark, except for the few lights that were still being used for the phone operators. I gasped when something touched me, bringing me out of my thoughts. But relaxed when I sensed Dimitri behind me and felt his arms come around my body.
"What are you doing?" I asked, shocked.
We worked and spent a significant amount of time together on both Tasha and Mason's case, but Dimitri hadn't showed me a shred of affection since that day in the hospital. And he hadn't kissed me since that day in his cabin. It was stunning that he was giving me attention now that was even remotely romantic.
"Am I not allowed to touch you?"
"I don't know. Are you?"
He let go of me and returned to his desk. "I apologize. That was very unprofessional of me."
"Oh, here we go again! I'm sick of these head games. You're so hot and cold."
"I just tried to hold you and your whole body went tense like you were cozying up to a venomous snake. What am I supposed to believe, Rose?"
"Are you out of your mind? How have I not shown you that I want to be with you? You act like you can't stand to be in the same room as me. " I said. "You don't give a damn about me. Which is unfortunate as fuck, because I care about you so fucking much."
Dimitri shot to his feet and came at me full force. "Don't tell me how I'm feeling." he growled, towering over me.
"Actions speak louder than words." I shot back, ripping open the door. "I'm so tired and done here. I have to go. Have a great night, Belikov."
For some reason, I expected him to chase me. I wanted him to chase me, to stop me from leaving. I wanted him to yell and tell me how wrong I was. I wanted him to wrap his arms around me, drag me back into that office, and make love to me all night. But mostly, I wanted him to show me how much he loved and cared for me.
This wasn't a fairy tale, though. This was real life. And all of that never happened. I remember looking back at Dimitri one last time before I exited the building and headed home. He just stood there, watching me. And when he let me go like that, I felt like I had lost it all.
I guess I really was the only person I could rely on and trust. I had changed, I could feel it so strongly. I wasn't the same person anymore. I was hardened, mature, brave, wise, and I was no longer going to take chances anymore - because look where they had gotten me so far. My sense of duty ran strong and I had become a cop for a reason, with one mission in mind - to find Ambrose and make him pay for what he had done. Payback was a real bitch.