I Don't Want to be a Hero - Second Year
Chapter Thirty-Nine
The Hall of Armory
4 Jan 1993
The holidays of feasting, and gifts, holly and ivy, and a chorus of lights was over. Term began at Hogwarts, and in between classes, and at mealtimes, the halls buzzed with the conversations of children relating their holidays.
"Mum won a trip to Egypt," enthused Ron Weasley at that morning's breakfast. "She's always entering contests in Witches Weekly, and she finally won one!"
"We saw!" Draco grinned and held up the Daily Prophet that had a photo of the Weasley family all waving at the camera. Percy was holding up a small golden yellow cat with very large ears.
"I like your brother's warwagul," said Luna. Harry was trying to be secretive about the fact he was holding Luna's hand in between them; everyone knew of course.
"It's a fennec, Luna," corrected Ron.
"Those are wild," informed Hermione. "How did you get a wild fennec?"
"Some Egyptian lady had a bunch of kittens with big ears, and Percy's got big ears, so I think that's why he bought one," smirked Ron.
"How come we haven't seen it?" asked Hermione as she looked down the table at Percy chatting to his girlfriend, a pretty blonde girl by the name of Penelope Clearwater from Ravenclaw.
Ginny giggled, "Gabby doesn't like Percy. She keeps biting his fingers every time he tries to pet her or hold her so mum has her."
"Gabby likes chasing the garden gnomes out of mum's garden," added Ron.
Breakfast was suddenly shattered by the arrival of a large, silvery wolf that ran between the Hufflepuff and Gryffindor tables towards the dais. It braked to a sudden stop, howled, and then Professor Lupin's voice came from the Patronus.
"Madame Pomfrey, please help. Albus and I are in the Hall of Armory. We're trapped!"
The Patronus faded as Madame Pomfrey quit her breakfast, and with a lifting of the skirts of her Healer's uniform, she ran from the Great Hall.
"Everyone will please settle down and finish your breakfast," Headmistress McGonagall ordered.
It took a few minutes but breakfast took over in favour of whatever was going on in the Hall of Armory.
Just as Severus was entering the Infirmary for a visit with Poppy he ducked as a Summoned Healer's bag went sailing over his head. Sensing something was up he raced after the Summoned black bag. He was running so fast when he came to the Entrance Hall he collided with Poppy just as she put up her hands to catch her Healer's Bag.
"Severus…" she grumbled as she untangled herself from the slim man. "What are you doing here?"
"I came to see you, Poppy. Did you not get my owl?" replied Severus as he gave her a hand up. "What is the matter?"
"Remus' Patronus arrived in the Great Hall at breakfast. He and Albus are trapped in the Hall of Armory. I expect it might have something to do with his Accidental Magic. Come along!" She ordered as she ascended the moving staircase. "You'll be of some aid!"
Severus ran up after the Healer and caught the hem of her skirt before she jumped over to another staircase. "A trick, Poppy." Poppy turned to watch as Severus laid a hand upon the railing of the staircase. "Fourth floor, please." To Poppy's astonishment the staircase did not meet another but levitated upwards to the fourth floor entrance, and connected with the landing.
"I shall ask you about that later, Severus," Poppy smiled. "Albus and Remus first." She broke into a run that led her to the near end of the corridor. A right turn directed her to the entrance of the Hall of Armory.
Neither Poppy nor Severus could enter as every piece of armor was in pieces that careened about the hall in dangerous metal hunks. Albus was at the center of the hall curled up, and sobbing, calling out for 'Ariana', and begging her to forgive him.
Remus was at the far end of the hall surrounded by a mace, a broadsword, a great axe, and a half-dozen daggers. All of them floated in a circle around him, and jabbed menacingly when he moved.
"Poppy! Severus!" shouted Remus. "It's Albus Accidental Magic! He would not take his potion today!" Remus yelped as a dagger nicked his cheek.
"Shut up, Remus!" ordered Severus. "We'll figure this out!" He lowered his voice. "I have no means of calming Accidental Magic, Poppy."
"Albus needs someone he trusts," she muttered. "Parents can calm a child's Accidental Magic…"
"His parents are long gone" groused Severus.
Poppy glowered at him. "Stating the obvious, Severus? You're supposed to be helping."
"I was about to add that Albus has a brother, woman," he glowered right back. "Aberforth may be able to stop this." He lifted his wand. "Expecto Patronum!" Icy silver mist shot from his wand but formed into… an amorphous, billowing blob. Severus wondered what had happened to his Doe Patronus but had no time to question it. "Go to Aberforth, and tell him we need him here as quickly as possible." The unformed Patronus vanished through the stone walls.
All they could do now was wait, and hope that Aberforth was able to calm his brother down.
25 Minutes Later
Aberforth thumped heavily along the fourth floor corridor until he reached Poppy and Severus. He glanced into the maelstrom that was the Hall of Armory.
"Strewth!" he cursed. "Wotch yeh bring me here for, Severus?"
Poppy answered, "Your brother's Accidental Magic can't be controlled, Aberforth. We need you to calm him down so we can help him."
Aberforth shook his shaggy head. "I'll have no truck wi' him," he spat. Literally. Severus had just stepped back to avoid the spittle.
Severus grasped the older wizard's arm, "He's like a child, man! Albus does not remember what caused your feud."
"But I do, Severus," he meant to yank his arm from the younger wizard's grip but found that Severus' hand would not release him.
"And, you wish him to die, then? To take Lupin with him?" Severus accused sharply. "Stop being selfish, you old goat! Your brother needs your help, and you will. help. him."
"I will no'," maintained Aberforth just as fiercely. "It were his fault that Ari's dead. Let 'im bleat. I don't…"
Severus muttered an unwritable imprecation and dragged the older wizard towards Albus. He walked just fast enough that none of the pieces of armor struck him. Aberforth had to keep ducking. Once they reached the old Headmaster who was curled tightly into himself, silent and rocking, Severus pushed Albus' estranged brother beside him. Severus crouched down just as a beribboned helm swung through where his head would have been.
Aberforth did nothing until Severus nudged his shoulder sharply.
"Albus?" asked Aberforth. He tried again. "Albus!" There was still no sign that Albus had not completely withdrawn in upon himself figuratively, and literally.
"Aberforth, you are only causing more agitation," said Severus tightly as he ducked a gauntlet that dove towards him. "Comfort. your. brother."
Aberforth growled in his throat, closed his eyes, and tried to recall the big brother he had looked up to when they were children. Opening his eyes he leaned close to his brother, and touched the man's back with his hand. Inwardly, Aberforth was taken aback by how this his brother's back felt.
"Albie, it's Abe. C'mon big brother. I want'ta hear yer voice. Albie?" He began to pat the older wizard's back.
"Abe?" sighed Albus as he slowly lifted his head. Severus deflected a leg piece that threatened all three of them.
"Yeh, Albie, it's me. Whatsa matter, Albie? Yeh looks upset."
"I wish you'd have let me speak but you shut me out…"
"'Bout wot, Albie?" he asked in a gruff with trepidation.
"Gellert killed poor Ariana. On purpose. She was holding me back from…" Albus sniffled. "...from greatness."
Aberforth stiffened as he heard of the past but he did not stop the soothing touch of his hand upon his brother's back. "Why dint'cha ever tell me, mon… I mean, Albie?"
"I miss her, Abe," he sobbed. "My heart aches everyday for Ari but it's worse for you."
"Why is it worse fer me?" he wondered if his brother meant his pain at losing their sister was moreso for him.
"I've lost you, too, Abe. I know where you are but you hate me, and I wish you didn't. Each day I wake up…" tears fell from his eyes into his beard. "Each day… good morning, Abe. May Merlin bless you, little brother… each day…" he broke into a sob, and Abe pulled the distraught man close to him.
"Severus!" called Remus. "Give Albus his potion!" Remus sent the Clarity Potion disguised as a Nutrition Potion to the Potions Master. He caught the potion, broke the seal, and handed to Aberforth.
"Bit o'Nutrition, Albie. Bet'll make yeh feel better," said Aberforth holding the potion bottle close to his brother's lips.
Albus smiled, and the weapons surrounding and attacking Remus dropped. The armor pieces were still in the air but they were hovering in place. Remus scooted over towards Severus.
"Will you take a drop, Abe?" asked Albus as he looked askance at the potion.
"Course I will, Albie." Aberforth lifted the potion, kept his mouth closed, but pretended to swallow. Albus let out a sigh of relief. He sat up, took the potion from his brother, and swallowed all of it down. Almost immediately he began to blink his eyes rapidly as the Clarity Potion flowed through his system.
There was quite a cacophonous noise as the armor pieces dropped to the floor. Poppy trotted in, and knelt down by the old wizard. Aberforth patted his brother's hand. "Feelin' a mite better, Albie?"
"Aberforth!" Albus clutched his brother's hand in both of his. "Why are you here?"
Once again he felt how thin his brother was, and it was alarming. "Severus called me. Tol' me yeh was outta sorts." With his present day brother back Aberforth wanted his hand back, but it felt good to touch this man he had admired in his childhood. It had been so many decades since either of them had spoken kindly to each other. Gently he curled the brittle thin fingers into his own more beefy paw.
It had been years, decades even, in which Aberforth had looked upon his brother in person. He noted how thin the once very powerful wizard looked, and a shiver arced through him as he realised that, slow as it might be, his brother was dying. It was one thing to nurse a feud with a living man but Aberforth never wanted to lose his brother. He had all ready lost his doting mother, and sweet sister. Their father had deserved his death so Aberforth never thought of him. To lose Albus… his heart ached.
Albus noticed the disarray of the armor. "Me?" he asked everyone around him.
"You had a nightmare, Albus," said Remus gently.
Albus pulled his hands away from his brother and began nervously threading his fingers through his beard. "A nightmare…"
Aberforth felt that old, old anger in his gullet but he forced it away as he grasped one of his brother's hands. "Yeh tol' me, Albie, 'bout Gellert. Wot he done to our Ari. Here I been thinkin' twas you done hexed her, an' you took that blame. Should'na done that."
"No… no…" Albus frowned, and then looked to Severus. "My boy, did I blame the 'greater good' for what I did to Aberforth?"
Aberforth did not allow Severus to answer. "It don't matter, Albie. What's done is done." He stood. "Me knees don't like this floor, Albie. Mus' be hard on yer backside." He slipped a hand under Albus elbow, and Remus took the other side. Together they helped the elder wizard off the floor. "I 'spect yer a mite tired, Albie. Why'n't we go, an' get yeh into bed. Come along now."
Remus glanced over his shoulder. "Poppy, would you come by in an hour to make sure Albus is all right."
"Of course, Remus, but rest is the best. And, tea."
The Hogwarts Healer and Severus watched as the three men returned to Albus' headquarters. Once they were gone, Poppy turned to Severus.
"I did get your owl, Severus," she began. "Not that I am not flattered by your offer but don't you think an offer of courtship is premature when you've never shown any such interest in me before?" Poppy eyed him critically; a look that always managed to make the man squirm. It did so now.
"To be honest, Poppy," gulped Severus. He had no idea how difficult this sort of truth was. He coughed, and the bloody witch smirked at him. "There you go with that smug little smirk of yours. Makes me wonder just where my head is at in regards to you, witch."
"Have you always fancied me, Severus," Poppy smiled.
"Of course not, silly woman!" he blustered, and drew his Winter cloak about himself. He then crossed his arms over himself indignantly, "Have you not heard the rumours? I am hopelessly in love with a dead woman."
Poppy had the effrontery to laugh, and Severus grumbled under his breath. She reached out and lay her hand upon his forearm. "Severus, of course you loved Lily. She was your best friend. However, you were never in love with her." Again he squirmed under that forthright gaze of hers. "I know it hurt you terribly when you began to see her as she was. Remember, I was the one who took you away from Gryffindor tower when you refused to leave. From that day forward I saw you close those emotions away; every time her name was mentioned."
Severus placed his hand over the Healer's with the intention of pushing her away but her skin was so pleasantly warm. He felt that curious tingle, that blossoming of warmth in his blood he had begun to feel each time the Healer had occasion to lay her hand upon him. It was the same sensation that he had felt when he danced with her at the Winter Ball. It was both a temptation, and a fright.
Poppy wove her fingers into those of the wizard. "I was seven years older than you when we met in your first year, Severus. Children. That first year I thought you were the most scatterbrained child with all the many excuses you devised to come into the Infirmary. Healer Ganglion thought it amusing that if I were not there, you would just leave. A plaster, a burned hand, you tripped, got caught in the trick stair on the moving staircase, you had a headache, you had… a nightmare. Do you remember how many times, as a student, you came to the Infirmary to sleep where no one would bother you?"
Severus nodded once but then he spoke softly, to remind her, "I was sent to the Infirmary many times, Poppy."
"Oh yes," she sighed and shook her head. "Sirius and James, even horrid Peter. The worst of Gryffindor. Remus brought you a number of times when their pranks resulted in the worst."
"He what?" Severus pulled his hand out of hers, and glared. "That werewolf would never do such a thing for a Slytherin, much less me. He hated me!"
"Of course he did, Severus," Poppy tutted wisely. "And, if I recall you weren't terribly fond of him either. Still, that did not stop Remus from doing the right thing by bringing you to the Infirmary when you could not do so yourself. I made certain to give him a good lecture each time, and Healer Ganglion, my mentor, always took points from Gryffindor for your injuries." Poppy walked leisurely to the entrance of the Hall of Armory which was still in disarray. At the entrance she turned sideways. "I would hope that your decision to court me did not come to you after I removed my Glamour, Severus." The Healer turned, and left.
Severus stared after Poppy, and when he felt a bit foolish for not moving he looked around at all the armor that had been left in pieces. He began to reassemble the armor (no easy task) since he was not certain what piece went with what set of armor. If he was wrong, the incorrect piece would be spat onto the floor a few seconds later.
As he continued his mind-numbing task Severus agreed that his offer of courtship had been premature; for Poppy. For him, it was not. He had not taken into consideration that he had kept himself closed off from any relationship with the opposite sex because of the threat of Voldemort, the Death Eater he had been, the foolish young man. He felt he did not deserve such a future, and Albus had done very well in reminding him that there was not to be such a happy ending for him once Voldemort was finally dealt with.
Then there were rules at Hogwarts. Not rules that governed just the students but the staff as well, and every year Albus had made it clear that they were to be adhered to. It was not a difficult matter but that one rule about fraternising with a colleague was discouraged.
Severus knew in his soul that the moment he had first met Poppy Pomfrey she had intrigued him. In turn, she had also a nurturing, busy-body nature that could easily irritate him. Yet, he had thought up excuses to go to the Infirmary just to talk to her.
He snorted at the needy boy he had been. Even that first year after the Sorting Lily was withdrawing from him. Their long discussions were fading to the mundane subjects of schoolwork. Lily would also chide Severus for how 'dark he had become'.
Poppy had always been open to his questions about Healing, about the potions she was learning, and also about herself but he had been tighter with his personal information. Much of it came out, bit and pieces over his time as a student.
As Poppy's colleague his first year as a teacher Severus had expected his boyish crush on the Healer to fade away. He also had the Death Eaters to deal with and he had quickly realised then that he had gotten into something more than just a passing curiosity; he had signed over his life.
He had also noted his first year that Poppy had aged since the time he had left Hogwarts as a student and the time he had returned as a teacher. Perhaps, he had thought then, her compassion towards the students that passed through her Infirmary had aged her.
Her age had not been a hurdle to a friendship as adults that he pursued in earnest. It was her intelligence, her laugh, her many expressions that attracted him to the witch.
Often he and Poppy would have tea at the end of the day to talk about his students. She would also allow him to gripe about his 'dotty and irritating' employer, and it had been Poppy who helped him in dealing with the perplexing and embarrassing female half of his Snakes.
In his third year Poppy had shown him that of all the students it was those in his House that tended to have more unstable home lives, and so in his fourth year at Hogwarts he had begun the yearly, and mandatory, physical exam for all of his Snakes.
Poppy had also made it clear to him that he was not simply a teacher to his Snakes but he was parentis loco; he was their parent when they were at school. He had wanted to keep himself separate from the students in general but Poppy had persevered in her insistence that his Snakes needed him to be available. His Snakes had more to look forward to than a career playing Quidditch, working at a shop, or working for the Ministry. Voldemort was pressuring the parents of his Snakes to recruit their children to the cause of the Dark Lord, and he knew this.
Severus had learnt that depression, anxiety, and suicide (all considered the maladies of the Muggle) were constant presences in the House of Slytherin. His Snakes were all very good at hiding their hurt because they were taught to do the same at home. Just as he himself had been taught.
With Poppy's help Severus had worked with his Snakes to provide them with alternatives to being just mindless followers or worse Death Eaters belonging body and soul to Voldemort.
As his students learned to focus and control their magic, it had been he who had taught his Snakes the value of thinking for themselves, and not just their family. He taught them the value, and satisfaction, in creating with one's own hands your future.
There were times when his Snakes, even those no longer students, would come to him for his help in avoiding the evil that was the Dark Lord. For his Snakes Severus had moved heaven and earth all while presenting to his Master that he was a loyal sycophant.
And, Poppy had been, if not literally by his side, she had been so figuratively. Severus had discovered that a fully licensed Healer had many more avenues to access than he, as a mere teacher, had. Poppy had falsified medical exams, test results, even created the appearance of illness and death. Whatever it took to remove a child of his from danger.
Severus had admired Poppy, her strength, her convictions, and her creative mind. He had never allowed his mind to drift into fantasy involving the woman who had become so close to him. He was a gentleman. Therefore he never let her know how he felt towards her. It was not allowed in the rules.
Then came his chance to leave behind those students he tried to teach who did not want to learn in the form of shed basilisk skin. His life would finally, and truly, be his own. He could live on his island, have his apothecary, and discover new potions to cure the ills of his world. Retirement.
Retirement had not been an easy thing for Severus to desire fully. He worried about his Snakes, and their futures, but Lucius, who enjoyed being a teacher, was a good replacement as the Head of Slytherin. Magic allowed Lucius his time at home, but he was never so far away that if one of Severus' Snakes needed their new Head of House, Lucius was available.
What Severus had realised that night at the Winter Ball after dancing with the un-glamoured Poppy, and talking with her as he had not done so in months, was that he would not be able to see her on a daily basis anymore. He would have his son to raise, a new business to grow, but Poppy would be far away from him. At the end of the Winter Ball, as he had put his son to sleep on their island, and he had sat in the quiet darkness of his living room Severus had realised that there was an emptiness in his life that would never be filled. That emptiness was his friendship with Poppy. He had left her behind.
That emptiness, and the knowledge that that damned rule no longer held him in its thrall, had decided him. He had thought long and hard about bringing Poppy into his world, his family, if she were willing. Not out of convenience or that he did not want to let go of a friend, but he had asked himself if he had ever harboured such feelings for Poppy that would make her his companion, his wife, and Harry's mother.
Severus knew without a doubt that he wanted Poppy in his life not just because she was his friend, but his heart had long ago been hers; she just did not know it.
She was a beauty but she was no more perfect than he was. A fine network of wrinkles were just beginning to make themselves known around her eyes, and her arms. Her golden silk of hair, when he had been able to see it as they danced had been enhanced by a few strands of white. Severus had seen, as he admitted he had seen even through her Glamour, that Poppy was a singular work of art that he would never tire of looking upon.
Nearly all of the sets of armor were assembled but Severus was left with a gauntlet that did not appear to belong with any of the reassembled sets of armor. He glared at the gauntlet, the many sets of armor now lining the hall, and gave the gauntlet an even darker glare. He dropped it to the floor. "Go find your mates on your own," he growled. "I am done with all of you." Severus then stomped out of the Hall of Armory.
Several minutes passed, and the gauntlet began to vibrate, and its metal fingers twitched. Suddenly it rose up, then flew down towards the one set of armor that was missing a gauntlet. It settled quickly into place. The entire set of armor shook like a wet dog would as it settled back into itself.
Severus did not know but he had never to re-assemble the sets of armor. Left alone the pieces, all charmed to do so, would have reassembled themselves.
"Of course," mused the Gryffindor ghost Sir Nicholas to the Slytherin ghost the Bloody Baron, "T'would not be wise to mention to the fellow there was no need to bother straightening up."
The Bloody Baron chuckled silently beside Sir Nicholas. He then slapped the Gryffindor ghost's shoulder in a comradely manner so firmly it knocked the knight's head askew.