Chapter Six - Lemons
As the nights got a little more bearable, the days did not improve much. Sleep deprivation and constant anxiety were not a good combination when walking through the busy halls of Hogwarts, it was just too alive. And really couldn't people justleave him alone?! The stares and whispers everywhere Harry went... it's not like he asked for any of this to happen.
Okay yeah, so today was not a good day. Not that there have been any good days recently, it was just a particularly bad day.
Harry had completely forgotten his charms essay, causing Flitwick to call him out on in at the beginning of class. He did not know what he hated more, the concerned look Flitwick shot him, or the annoyed and somewhat angry looks from the class. Hermione even scolded him, as if this essay was a life and death task! It all just seemed so pointless.
After lunch Snape had given him the scolding of the year. It was bound to happen... Harry couldn't have expected to just ignore all homework and just get concerned glances shot at him for it. But he really tried to focus and muster up the energy to work on it. Not that that did any good, to be honest he didn't think he tried that much. Of course, of all teachers, why did it have to be Snape that actually berated him for it?! Something about being a spoiled and thinking too high of yourself or was said by Snape. Somehow, Harry couldn't agree more.
He did not deserve to roam the halls of Hogwarts while Cedric couldn't anymore. He did not deserve to laugh with his friends, while Voldemort was able to kill a muggle family any second now. He did not deserve to complain about this. Snape was right, he was spoiled, taking his life for granted.
Unconsciously his right hand was grabbing his left arm where the newly created scar of Voldemorts resurrection would forever be with him. As he looked at it, images flood his mind. Voldemort rising, Pettigrew talking, green lights, open empty eyes... Cedric's eyes. He felt the pressure on his chest increasing, his vision getting more blurred, and the tingling in his arms and legs. Barely breathing and not being able to stand up, Harry fell on the floor against a wall. He knew it was just a panic attack, he had had quite a few during his life, but recently they had increased significantly. All Harry could do was just wait it out, even though it hurt... guess I deserve that.
Unfortunately Cho passed him not 10 minutes after having recollected himself of the corridor's floor. She wanted to talk. And that is how he ended up the afternoon in an empty classroom retelling the death of Cedric and drying Cho's tears. Cho finally was able to pull herself together slightly and gave a small sad smile towards him "so sorry harry you had to go through this alone, I am so sorry I feel so terrible and I miss him so much. I know I can't blame you, but I just have to go now. If only you could have done more."If only he could have done more. That stung, that really drove a knife in his heart and twisted it around. It just broke him for another hour, silently crying his eyes out the moment Cho had closed the door.