Chapter Sixteen - Summer Exchange
Malfoy,
I am really not sure why I am writing, but honestly Hedwig was just happy to have something to do. I cannot imagine you living close to muggle London, so I suppose you live quite far away. Give Hedwig an extra treat or something, she deserves it.
I really have no idea what I expect by writing you... I had to do something soooo you will have to survive getting some letters from me. I am bored and need to have something on my mind, honestly.
Yesterday I once again couldn't sleep and as you might understand, I cannot just easily go out for a walk around the block you know. I did get myself some tea, that's how I came up with writing you. I stole my aunts' 'fancy' tea, Darjeeling or something, you would probably like it, it's expensive and posh. I think that I am going mad by talking only to Hedwig.
HP
Potter,
To say I was surprised to receive your letter is an understatement. While your life seems extremely boring, I would like to point out that mine is the complete opposite and while I appreciate your writing, shouldn't you be complaining to those 'friends' of yours? I daresay I am not the best sympathiser, as can be understood for someone at my level of society, and would appreciate it if you take understanding in this.
I must applaud your aunt for her tea choices, the Darjeeling tea is an old English tea that we acquired from the North of India in I must say, better times. My mother holds this particular tea in high regard, but I am afraid my tastes are a bit sweeter and, dare I say, even more sophisticated. I personally take high pleasure from French tea sorts. When my mother and I are in our French Manor, we often go visit a tea specialist. Last time he recommended Thé des Vahinés, which has become one of my favourite teas to drink. I recommend you ask your aunt whether she knows of it, or even holds it in her possession, which is unlikely but not impossible. The tea specialist only does business with highly regarded people, you see, and we Malfoys are, of course, one of the highest.
How dare you imply that I do not understand how to treat an owl properly. I am greatly offended by this and will take notice of it. To be honest, I am uncertain why I am even replying to your letter. Out of pity I presume.
Should you be interested in learning more on tea drinking, I am quite acquainted and would take pleasure in teaching an imbecile like you to navigate through the wondrous world of tea.
Well wishes,
D. L. Malfoy
Postscriptum. You should always end your letters with an ending phrase. Has no one thought you proper etiquette Potter?