People who met Spencer Reid assumed he was touch averse. They listened to the excuses to avoid handshakes and the massive personal space bubble which might as well have flashing neon signs saying "STAY AWAY" and that was that. But Spencer wasn't like that at all, not with people he knew. Spencer might not like being close to strangers, with their potential for unsavoury personal hygiene habits, but his team were different.
Spencer liked contact from those he trusted, particularly post case when he was drained and needed comfort. It was well known that during a case Spencer wouldn't sleep, would rarely remember to eat, and would pretty much survive on sweetened coffee. The intense mental stimulation of their job, coupled with the lack of self-care, would leave Spencer reeling by the time they got on the jet home and in desperate need of help to get him back to himself. The BAU team all had a massive soft spot for the young Dr Reid and all took pleasure in indulging him when he needed it. It wasn't exactly a hardship to provide the touch-starved man with a hug on the jet, or a comforting side to lean into on post-case debriefings. He didn't ask for much and they were all well aware that his life outside of the team lacked the family the rest of them had to support them and provide physical reassurance. So, without discussion or conscious thought, they all became that for him when he asked it of them.
They could rank the level of his emotional need by who he chose to help him. JJ often got a sleepy but calm Reid next to her after a successful case, chatting away about this and that while she played with his hair. As Henry's godfather they were pretty much family, and she treated him as such. She fussed over him and made sure he ate and drank something other than coffee, and asked after his weekend plans and included him in her family's.
Emily seemed to be chosen if Reid had done anything even remotely badass, particularly if his cleverness saved the day. They high-fived and rough housed (as much as one can on an aeroplane) and sniggered at videos on Emily's phone or played complicated card games, hunched close together and goofing about. Emily was like the big sister he never had, always ready with a plan that would inevitably end in trouble for them both.
If the local force were trying in their interaction with Spencer, if they questioned his abilities and made him second guess himself, then it was Rossi he looked to for an avuncular boost, complete with an arm round his shoulder, long winded stories about old cases that all started with 'Hey kid, have I told you about the time…' and a little shared scotch until he could fall asleep, still propped against Rossi's side.
Some cases were easier on the team than others. If it was bad, if the death toll was high and the unsub sadistic, then Morgan wouldn't wait to be approached but would drag Spencer to the sofa as soon as they got on the plane. He would wrap Spencer in a soft blanket kept in the overhead lockers, cover his ears with Morgan's headphones and a playlist he made specially for such occasions, and sit so close that Spencer was virtually in his lap as he outright cuddled his 'little brother'. Morgan kept him feeling safe, kept his mind occupied with music and touch so he could get some much needed rest and shut his brain off from going back over and over the case. Morgan took his role as protector very seriously.
But if it was unspeakable, if it was children, or horrors no-one should have to see, or if one of them nearly didn't make it back, then Hotch was the one Spencer turned to. The quietly spoken Unit Chief would steer Spencer in to the seat next to the window, then sit next to him, arms resting on the table, effectively shielding him from the rest of the team. Hotch's suit jacket would be wrapped around Spencer's shoulders and somehow Hotch always managed to have some dried fruit to offer along with a bottle of water. He gave Spencer a place to think without comment or censure. He didn't push Spencer to talk about it, but was ready to listen should he want to.
Paperwork would cover the space in front of them and Hotch would silently work until Spencer was able to rouse himself enough to read over Hotch's shoulder and offer a word or two in commentary. They would talk quietly, Hotch asking about seemingly random things unconnected to the case and listening carefully to the answers whilst continuing to fill in boxes on the reports. Once the pens were capped and the papers put back into the briefcase, Spencer would lean against him, still whispering facts. It wouldn't take long before he would be curled up with his head on Hotch's lap. Hotch would lean back and relax, leaving a hand in Spencer's hair or on his shoulder, keeping him grounded while they both slept.
It had become something of a litmus test for the core BAU team when vetting new members to see how they reacted to Spencer post-case. Their reaction to a strung out and needy Spencer told the whole team whether they were a keeper or would be transferring out again in a matter of weeks. One particular newbie was so derogatory in his comments about Reid when he fell asleep on Morgan that the newbie didn't last past the flight home - Hotch completing the transfer papers mid flight in seething anger at the lack of compassion shown. In comparison, when Alex Blake first encountered Reid on the jet she merely smiled indulgently and offered Rossi a top up of coffee as he was trapped in his seat. She was clearly one of them.
Spencer never called them out on their indulgence of him. Perhaps he saw that looking after him gave them all something they needed too. That he gave them the chance to be something more themselves, to be in control for a short while and make something better for someone when all too often the world around them was a dark and sordid place. That perhaps an arm around a shoulder, or a shared conversation was less about providing him with the comfort he asked for and more about the mutual need for care and affection between them all. After all, caring for each other was what families did.