Let the light guide you trough
AU Finchel. She heard it like they all had. They boys were coming home, within the next few hours she'd be able to hold Finn again. Or so she thought. After a mission goes terribly wrong, Rachel is left wondering if she'll ever see him again. And then the she sees the white car approaching. Her heart shattering into a million pieces.
A/N: okay guys! I'm here again! This chapter is took me a long time to cook up as I didn't know how it would turn out! I hope you like it.
I DON'T OWN GLEE! or the song by Teddy Geiger used here!
Chapter 9:
The package arrived on a cold October afternoon as Rachel made her way home from running errands. It just sat there, enormous and alone in her living room. It had been a couple hours since the kids had arrived from school but it seemed no one had made an effort to look inside.
soon she would understand why. It was a package from Finn, sent exactly two months before his disappearance. With shaky hands Rachel moved the tape away to uncover the lid. Jack examined it with her. "What is it mom?" He asked.
"I'm not sure." She admitted sitting on the ground and beginning to take everything out of the box. Jack helped her pulling everything out with her carefully. First came a package of letters. Each with one child's name on it. And Rachel's.
"Oh God." She remembered having to call Kurt because it was too much for her to take. Finn had taken the time to make this package for them, presents for each child's birthday he'd missed and his anniversary to Rachel.
"What does all of this even mean Kurt?" She asked exasperated She'd been slowly trying to put herself back up for the sake of her kids for so long now, for so long after the funeral which had been so hard on her, and somehow she could not let herself go."Did he know he, wasn't going to come back?" Her best friend stared at her in utter hopelessness. He wasn't sure why Finn had sent this and why it had arrived until now, he must have known something might go wrong.
Well of course he was being careful, he was in the midst of a war. Nothing turned out as it was expected. Puck and Quinn for example tried to pick up the pieces as he was given indefinite leave. Sam and Mercedes had went on to plan their wedding, one Sam cursed because it was clear he would not be able to dance at his own wedding, when he'd told Santana this she scolded him and told him Finn would not be there to be his best man so he better just shut his pie hole. As for Mike, recovery had come slower and more painful and yet he had remembered having Finn say he'd plan a surprise for Rachel and the kids and he hoped it would arrive the same time he would.
Sadly, only one of two things had arrived at Rachel's doorstep and it killed her.
"Honey, well he was in the middle of a war, none of us know what happened out there, I'm just guessing he was being careful , in case something did happen."
"Something did happen Kurt. He died," Rachel said dryly curling into her bed as she stared at the box and battle whether to tell her children about it or not.
When Jack beat her to it, she figured it was best to get it over it like band aid and take it off quickly rather than make any more miserable, so she sat her children down around the living room and handed them each an envelope. Matt took his with a weary manner. He knew what this meant. "This is it huh? He really is dead."
"Matt..." Hannah pleaded. She was still not used to hearing her daddy was in heaven so literally. "Don't say that!"
"Why? It's the truth... and now we're supposed to sit here and accept his stupid gifts? Well I don't want them..."
"Matty... I know we're all still in pain..."
"So this is meant to help?" He asked. Rachel stared at him for a moment as the teen sighed. Out of all of her children, Matt was the most outspoken and cold in a matter of her children, he was like that because he had experienced Finn leaving him more time than his siblings, as for Cory, he just tried to help Rachel the most so emotion wouldn't get the best of him.
"Okay well, all of us are entitled to be mad in anyway we want, so if you don't want to be here, you don't have to be." Rachel said as she totted Wyatt in her arms.
"Daddy.." the little boy said tracing his hands over Finn's handwriting on the box. Cory gave his brother a pleading look but Matt threw his envelope to the side and slammed the door to his room on his way up the stairs, making Rachel flinch as she tried to battle the tears coming from her eyes.
Rachel watched as each child received a present from Finn, whether or not it had been their birthday. Cory got his dad's old drumsticks to go with his set, Rachel cleaned her eyes as the memories of Finn playing back in school flooded her. He had also gotten Finn's own drum set which had rested in the attic for more than six months now, but the teen refused to touch them and instead was happy with just the sticks. Matt had gotten a new hockey Jersey by one of his favorite teams, the Vancouver Canucks, one present that she and Finn had been saving to give him for a while now. She figured it had been super special because on top of his special team jersey, he got one with the team colors with M. Hudson engraved in the back. Truth be told, Rachel was sure Finn had gotten the jersey before being moved overseas and had not told her about it.
Jack was the easiest one of all as he happily accepted personalized tags, a few coloring materials as he was sure he'd be the next big shot illustrator for either one of the big comics company, his son was a true artist and his drawings mostly expressed what he was feeling. "Paint beautiful memories buddy, love dad." was written on his drawing pad. Hannah was the tomboy of the family much to Rachel's dismay as she was the only girl, but her present wasn't any less special, she had such a wild imagination that she'd told Finn she wanted to be a writer, even though at her young age she was yet to be an expert so instead of that, Finn had gotten her a couple books and a special recorder for her to tell her stories to herself and then share it to others. The babies present's were a bit different, Perry was a ball of energy so he got tags with his name on them as well as a military cap and some candy, while the babies got regular baby stuff plus a message engraved golden bands , in fact, each of them had received a singular form of those golden bands from their dad.
When she reached the point of a small jewelry box with her name on it, she took a deep breath as she opened it. "For my partner in more ways than one, the love of my life. I hope this makes you smile." It read. The beautiful necklace was shining in all it's force when she took it out.
The last piece of the package had a notice. For mommy's eyes only.
Hey Rach, sorry I left this for last, even though it's not less important. I just hope you like it and, happy anniversary babe. I can't believe we've made it this far.
love forever Finn
She held on to the note as she pressed play on her computer.
A familiar tune began to sound on the background and she couldn't help but smile as she saw Finn with a wide smile on his face looking back at her. He held on to a guitar as Puck sat next to him equally excited but mumbling something about how he owed him one.
FINN:
I'm just an ordinary man,
Just trying to do the best I can.
(And there I'm faces in the sand?)
Just trying to find out where I stand,
Where I stand.
I skipped my heart across the sea,
And let them water set me free,
Give me a reason to believe,
(To rescue these forgotten dreams?)
I've always been afraid to change,
I don't want to make the same mistake,
When you lose it all,
You find yourself the strength to start again,
To start again.
I'm just an ordinary man,
You saw the beauty in my hands,
In time we'll learn to love again,
it's been so hard to understand.
I've always been afraid to fall,
That's the only way to change my life,
When you lose it all,
You find yourself the strength to start again.
beat
How many times can I walk away?
I finally said what I need to say,
Nothing to lose and almost everything to gain,
I open my eyes to another day,
I'm learning to see in a different way,
I know in the end that love will always find a way,
I've always been afraid to fall,
I've always been afraid to say it all,
Cause when you lose you lose it all,
With nothing left to say,
When you lose it all,
You're love will find a way,
When you lose it all,
You find yourself the strength to start again,
Start again.
As the music died down, the tears on her eyes became too much to bear. "Oh Finn..." She traced her fingers across the screen and onto his face as she smiled. "I love you so much, I promise to you I will be strong..." She cried as her own voice echoed in her heart.
The sound of her phone startled her, she cleaned her eyes and tried her best to compose herself. "Hello?"
"Mrs. Hudson?" A female voice said. Rachel held her breath as she, for some reason stared back at Finn on the screen.
"Yes, this, this is she..."
"My dear, I believe I have some news for you. We might have found your husband."
"I'm... have you..." She didn't even recognized herself when she asked if they had finally found his body.
"No, I... He's here in the hospital...I'm sorry it took us so long to..."
She dropped the phone as a sharp breath left her. Finn was alive.
Crappy ending I know! Sorry but yay! News on Finn again! and by the looks of it, he's alive! can we sigh in relief? But what in the world happened?