Chapter XVII

19th Cerveth 3002 T.A

Tauriel spent 59 years in the halls of Rivendell, she had plenty of chances to sail but found in herself that it was not time for her to leave the ones close to her. Life on Middle Earth had taken its toll of the once warrior elf she had witnessed so much death and it was difficult to go back to how she was. Tauriel was still the impulsive and reckless elf she always was and still wore eleven military garb rather than the gowns.

The almost 700 year old elf was still as beautiful as ever, red hair that grew only a tiny bit longer and her youthful look still unaffected by the years. She still maintained her spontaneous demeanor and it was that personality that grew Arwen, daughter of Lord Elrond to start an unlikely friendship with the Silvan elf.

Tauriel had met Arwen after a decade of living in Rivendell. Arwen was returning from Lorien and had come across Tauriel in the library and was curious about the new elf that called Rivendell home. They had discussed formalities and over time they quickly diminished and Arwen considered Tauriel kin just like how Legolas considered for Tauriel.

Another notion that brought the two women together was the friendship between Legolas and Aragorn. Everyone knew of the feelings between the man and half elf and it was only a matter of time before the approval of Lord Elrond. Legolas and Aragorn had gone out to find information on the evil rising in the east.

Tauriel knew she was lowly compared to her older friend but that never stop the two from coming together and talking about Arwen's fathers politics and the issues that were present in Middle Earth and also about love and life. Tauriel never spoke about Kili or what had happened, only Legolas knew and talking about it caused too much grief which she would never beat.

Just thinking about what would have happened if the child survived and how she would raise it to not think so lowly of their heritage and hold themselves high made her upset but every day she would think of them and continued on.

Tauriel had walked out onto a secluded balcony after she had woken up from a dream that involved a girl who she had not seen before sitting under a tree playing with a stone. After trying to go back to sleep to no prevail she ended up to where she was. Her night gown reflecting the moonlight that was always clear in Rivendell, she played with the necklace that Legolas had given her for celebrated birthday. The sliver chain had on it a small stone of some sort that glowed underneath the starlight.

"This night is quite beautiful, don't you think Tauriel?" Arwen spoke behind Tauriel, which caused the Silvan elf to leave her thoughts. "Sorry to disturb, you seem so caught up in your thoughts."

"It is quite alright my Lady." Tauriel bowed her head "Can you not sleep either?" she asked the beauty who walked up beside her

"I can hardly sleep when Aragorn is gone." Blue eyes met green eyes with kindness. "What has you up my friend?"

"Dreams and the unusual sort at that." She focused back on the starlight and Arwen look out towards the moorlands.

"I dreamt of a young girl, sitting underneath a Rhovanion tree. Playing with a rune stone that I had lost many years ago" Tauriel was confused as to who this girl was and why she invading her thoughts.

Arwen know looking back "And why was that unusual?" Tauriel had thought it was unusual because she had looked like Kili and had the same cheeky grin he had.

"Arwen, what you do if you lost Aragorn?" Tauriel had danced around the question before answering it. Arwen was taken aback by the question and was confused as to why she was asking. Before she got around to her answer Tauriel interrupted with an apology blaming the fatigue was affecting herself.

"You've lost someone before have you not? Someone you loved?" Arwen questioned with kindness and sympathy. Tauriel nodded played with her necklace again. "I do not mean to pry and to answer your question I would not know what I'd do I would probably pass of grief and weariness but I do not like to think of it. Are you okay Tauriel?"

"I lost someone I did not know I loved until after he died." Tauriel started her story hoping that Arwen would understand. "He was a dwarf." Tauriel stop after speaking and looked at Arwen, she had the same compassionate look on her face and started to speak "It only takes a moment to fall in love and a lifetime to say goodbye to it. You are who you are and people should love who they want regardless of race, gender or religion. We are all one." She was wise, hearing Tauriel was in love with a dwarf was nothing to her, she just wanted to heal Tauriel from the scars that love left upon her. Arwen believed in something that not many other people or elves at that believed in. Tauriel wanted to continue her story as she felt comfortable with it and realize it was love that hurt her, not being in love with a dwarf.

"I did not know I was in love with him at the time but I healed him during the Battles of the Five Armies and I must have felt something towards him because, I had a child by him which did not survive birth." Arwen was soundless, she listened with sorrow and empathy, not only did she lose her love but also her child. It now explained as to why Tauriel spoke of love in past tense and had no desire to find a partner. Elves only love once and Tauriel was robbed of that chance.

"Not all scars show, not all wounds heal. Sometimes you can't always see the pain someone feels. Do not be sad that you did not get a chance to love, sometimes we have to let go of something that once meant the world to us. Not because we want to, but because we have to. You will meet again, Tauriel, love treats us all differently. Arwen smiled with content as Tauriel smiled at her.

Everything was put into place by Arwen and she felt at peace with her life for the first time in 60 years. "Thank you for your kind words."

"It is what I am known for." The ladies parted ways after several moments and Tauriel reached her room and went back into bed and stayed awake for a little while longer. After speaking with Arwen, Tauriel knew that her time to sail was getting closer and she was pleased at the fact of sailing. Leaving Legolas would be hard but he would sail as well so it was not like she was leaving forever. She just wished could see Kili before she left.