Oooh, oooh, guess who waited a whole year to update for the next February to come after missing 2014's Valentine?!
To make up for it, here's a chapter that's literally twice as long than the first two combined with an unusually steep improvement in both writing and story depth that'll probably end up being really jarring for all readers-
But that aside, enjoy!
It was the fourteenth of February...or, to be more exact, it was half an hour away from the midnight of the fifteenth.
Under the midst of rain and cars frozen in time, two girls were riding on a motorcycle through it all. Driving the vehicle was that mysterious raven-haired girl called Homura, but more importantly, there was a drenched Sayaka on the back, with a vacant smile as she clutched a plain, simple plastic bag close to her chest, suppressing tears while doing so.
That morning, she had made the wrong choice. She could've given chocolates to either the boy she'd had a massive crush on for years but mostly ignored her, or the friend who made her feel truly happy every time they were together. Hence, she fooled herself into thinking that she had a chance, and instead of following her heart, she had followed her fantasies. It was a mistake, but at the time, she hadn't realized it. At least, not until that afternoon, when she caught a glimpse of her from a distance, their eyes meeting...
And yet, at the time, neither of them said anything. If, during that exact moment, she'd had anything, anything at all, it could've been a chance for her to give it. She just stood there and watched as that girlturned around and left. As much as she'd wanted to, she couldn't have taken the chance back then, since she'd already wasted it on someone else.
That occurred not too long ago. When Sayaka realized this, her emotions went out of control. Hastily gathered together what leftovers of the chocolate were still around, she rushed out blind into the heavy rain outside to search for the one human being who made her feel better, even though there was little to no chance to succeed amidst this massive city. Even as she tripped again, again and again and again and again and again and again onto the hard, wet streets and got smothered by more and more mud, she just got back up to continue. She might've even got hit by a car once. It began to dawn upon her that she might've been too late, and that she had already left for her hometown, but even then, she couldn't give up.
Yet, just when all seemed hopeless, that was when that mysterious raven-haired girl appeared out of nowhere, asking her what had happened. Figuring that she had nothing to lose, she simply let her feelings be known, rambling about this and that, how she'd given her heart to the wrong person and how she'd made a mistake she couldn't possibly fix. Then of all the things Homura could've responded, she went with—"Are you talking about Sakura Kyouko?"
Gah! Gah, gah, gah, had it really that obvious, even to someone she barely even knew?!
In any case, that was how Sayaka had ended up here now, on the road from Mitakihara to Kasamino. About an hour must have passed, but to the world, only about one minute had gone by. Seriously, how convenient was it that the one person who knew where she lived could also stop time, and not to mention have a motorcycle—though, come to think of it, maybe Homura just stole and hijacked it with magic.
Well, so long as it allowed them to get to Kasamino before midnight came and Valentine's Day ended, she wouldn't complain.
It was like, one massive miracle. It was just so unlikely, so unbelievable. But it really happened.
So, she couldn't fail now. She had to succeed!
"We're here."
The duo stopped in front of a large luxury hotel that towered over them. The environment around them was unfamiliar to her, with all the buildings here seeming colder, more practical in a way without bothering to be excessive, prizing industry over aesthetics. Overall, the atmosphere of Kasamino Town was very different from what Mitakihara was like.
"Once again, Akemi, thanks." Sayaka spoke nervously, trying to express her gratitude in a way that didn't involve screaming in happiness. "I… really appreciate it."
Then she got off the motorcycle, slightly worried that the fact that she'd been crying before might be visible in her ears, slightly scared about how Kyouko might react, this and that. However, if she was going to do this, she had to do it with a burning spirit. Summoning all her determination, she started to move forth towards the doors.
"Good luck, Sayaka," said Homura.
"Okay, but remember, you're coming with m—"
Just as she'd turned around, she caught a glimpse of Homura touching her time-altering shield, and in the next split second both she and her motorcycle just disappeared into thin air, leaving Sayaka all alone to fend for herself.
Then, all of her confidence drained away.
"HOOOOOOOOOOMMMMMMMMMMUUUUUUUUUUUUUUURRRRRRAAAAAAAAAAA!"
Alas, her attempts to call out for her sole companion were drowned out by the sound of the heavy downpour, persisting even in another town. Besides, even if it wasn't raining, Homura's ability allowed her to travel entire kilometers in just seconds, so who knew, she might've already gotten back to Mitakihara.
Wait. How am I supposed to go home?!
Phoning her parents this far off to pick her up, this late at night too, was practically unthinkable.
Left without a choice, Sayaka's only remaining option was to turn back towards the building towering over her. Of all the places Kyouko could've chosen to stay, why did it have to be here? Staring at it for a couple of minutes in silence, she gulped and finally mustered up the courage to enter through the automatic glass doors.
It must've been quite a bizarre sight when a young, teenage girl in a dirtied t-shirt and jeans entered, with her appearance so disheveled from her messy hair to her soggy shoes that it looked like she'd powered her way through a massive storm, not to mention how all she had in her possession was a small plastic bag. Only half an hour to midnight, she was so ridiculously out of place compared to the grand, well-furnished lobby that the receptionist panicked and ducked behind the counter for a moment, as though she'd been mistaken for some kind of zombie.
"Ugu…" Curse you, Akemi Homura! Curse you, curse you, curse you, curse you! What the heck am I supposed to do now anyway?! You could've at least told me the room number!
The girl herself could feel the warmth of the interior as she walked ahead, only then realizing that her body was shivering. Her drenched clothes had dried up somewhat over the journey, but they were still pretty wet, cold, and uncomfortable too. Keeping her head down, she tried not to let the grandness of the place get to her, but naturally, it wasn't helping. The very shoes she was wearing were leaving muddy footprints on the pale marble floor, and every attempt she tried to be unnoticed failed miserably as each step she took made a he loud squishy sounds that resonated painfully amidst this otherwise quiet, relaxed atmosphere. Imagine what Hitomi would say if she saw her in such an undignified state here!
No. No no no, she shouldn't think about that. One thought would lead to another, and then she'd be so overcome by fear and embarrassment that she wouldn't be able to go on anymore. This was already a nightmare. Don't think, just walk. Don't think, just walk. Don't think, and just walk.
Upon arriving at the counter, the blunette looked up to see a fairly old woman sitting behind it with tensely-narrowed eyes, one who didn't seem like she liked kids or teenagers in general. As soon as she opened her mouth, the woman interrupted her by asking her what she was doing here, wincing with each word, apparently struggling hard to maintain a formal, composed attitude in the face of someone who obviously didn't belong here.
Then, when she tried to properly answer, she found that her words were stuck in her throat. It hadn't occurred to her before, but what was she supposed to say anyway? How was she supposed to explain herself?! Should she just say something like 'Hey, I just, like, came here on formal business. Nothing special, just want to give a Valentine's present to someone. A friend said she'd be here… oh, didn't I mention that she's a girl?' and expect things to go smoothly? Or should she start from the very beginning and tell a long, sad story about their connection with each other so that she could be sympathized with?
Curse you, Homura! Seriously!
As a result of the lack of response, the receptionist really didn't have the patience for waiting around and seemed to assign her as some kind of hobo, going on to dully follow out some prewritten script and say things like "Unfortunately, we do not give out free accommodation" and "If you explain your case, we may be able to call your parents for you." Whenever she did try to state something, she kept getting interrupted before she could finish.
Reaching her limits, she decided to take a more direct approa-
"Oh, but if you intend on interacting with the guests here, I'm afraid that's a no-go. We can't have you disturbing anyone here."
"…what?!"
Just as she'd been reaching her limits and was about to try clearly explaining why she was here in great detail, her hopes were shot down by that one statement. So, what, after having made it all the way here, she wasn't being allowed to meet anyone?!
Well, it wasn't as though it was uncalled for, since no one in their right mind would ever let someone who looked like a hobo pass through. This hotel had high standards to uphold and guests to impress. Actually, now that she thought about it, it was kind of a miracle that she had gotten this far without being stopped by the guards. Were they on a break or something- no, no, that wasn't important! Focus!
"Okay, fine, that's understandable, but can I at least ask a question?" asked Sayaka, trying to maintain her own composure.
"No," came an overly blunt reply.
"Oh come on! I just want to ask about one of the guests!"
The receptionist closed her eyes and took a deep breath, before facing Sayaka directly. "If you have a relation to this person who is supposedly staying at our hotel, then could you please show some credentials to prove it first?"
Some… credentials? "Well, um, I'm not really related to her…"
"Do you know her room number?"
"Not really…"
"Does she at least know you're coming?"
"N- no."
As though concluding a case, the receptionist spun her chair away, no longer finding any real point in talking. "Then what possibly possessed you to believe that you would be allowed to meet this miss?"
"…"
There was no way that she could come up with an answer to that. To begin with, she and Kyouko had only known each other for a month or so. Sure, they'd hung out and fought Witches together along with the others, talked every now and then, but now that she thought about it, were the two of them really close? Had Kyouko considered her as a close friend, or did she only think of her as an ally with a similar life? Had this whole journey been pointless?
…No. Even if that were the case, she had to settle her own feelings no matter what.
However, after having come this far, was this really where her journey was going to end? Here? Only due to some stupid hotel rules? Out of the corner of her eye, Sayaka noticed a large, decorated clock attached to the wall which showed the time. 11:45 PM. This was the worst Valentine's Day ever. She didn't have time for this at all, and it was getting to the point that she was beginning to seriously consider transforming into a magical and just power her way through, regardless of the many cameras and normal people around here. A spectacle like that would definitely get Kyouko's attention, wouldn't it?
Oh, but what if Kyouko was asleep?
No, no, even more importantly, what if she wasn't in this hotel to begin with? What if this was all just some sort of prank by Homura to further torture her?!
Considering how that girl always acted so obsessive over Madoka, it wouldn't be a surprise. This may be a scheme to systematically eliminate all of Madoka's friends so that she could have her all for herself for Valentine's, in which case, she'd totally fallen for it.
"Well?" the receptionist asked again.
"Well, that's…"
It was hopeless. This was the end. If only she'd realized sooner that the balance between hope and despair was always zero. The more she hoped and tried to accomplish something, the more she would suffer as a result of it. Miracles didn't truly exist in this world. She'd made an irreversible mistake earlier that day, and by trying to fix it, what did she accomplish? Nothing.
How dumb… Well then, guess I should probably lea—
"SAYAKA?!"
Just as she was about to turn around and leave, a loud, unmistakable voice echoed throughout the lobby.
And there was only one person in the whole world who sounded like that!
"Is that…?" In response to the yell, she immediately towards the source—a girl with fiery red hair by the elevator, wearing denim shorts and a partly open green sweater in such a way that it gave off a careless, delinquent-esque impression that was just as out-of-place in this hotel as her own muddy, drenched self. The girl's brownish eyes were wide open and the look on her face was a mix of utter bafflement and disbelief, maybe wondering whether or not this was some kind of dream, or illusion, and to be honest she was thinking the same thing.
How to describe this feeling, growing in her heart? It was kind of like all the darkness that had built up throughout the course of this whole day was being washed away, just like that. With the sight of Kyouko right in front of her, in the flesh, she felt like all the troubles she'd had to go through were all worth it, just for this one… this one moment.
"K- K- Kyouko!" Sayaka replied back, putting in more power than she'd been intending. She also sounded shakier than usual, and though she hadn't noticed yet, there was a clear, relieved smile on her face.
"Oh, so you're with her? Never mind then, do what you want." As soon as the receptionist took a glance in the same direction, she appeared to shrug and give up.
"Sayaka, you… What are you doing here?!"
Kyouko ran over towards her, and the closer she got, the harder the blunette found for it to breathe. But it didn't matter—what was important was acting normal. Yeah. Like this was just a random visit out of the blue. Hopefully, she didn't look like she was about to burst into tears.
"Y- yo, Kyouko. How's it goin'?" Laughing it off a bit, Sayaka cleared her throat and gave a normal greeting, as if it was just a coincidence that they'd met here, and that it wasn't near midnight in some hotel far, far away from Mitakihara. "Well, as for me, just thought I'd pay a visit and see how you're doing. Nothin' special."
"How… When… Why…" It was pretty obvious that Kyouko was at a loss for words, her mouth hanging open, but the veteran magical girl then shook her head, figuring that things would make more sense later. "Erm… Maybe, maybe here's not the best place for this. U- upstairs then?"
"Sure."
The two girls made their way over to the elevator, and the top floor was selected before it shut tight with metallic doors to take them to the top, which would take about twenty stories. Compared to the lobby, the elevator wasn't all that special, but with mirrors on all four sides along with the ceiling, it made it impossible for Sayaka to look anywhere without feeling extremely uncomfortable, considering that the reflection in all of them showed her standing side by side with Kyouko herself.
Once again, she found herself having to check whether or not this real. Had she really made it all the way to Kasamino, or was she just dreaming? She had to be dreaming, right? After all, what she was doing right now…it was the stupidest thing she'd ever done in her entire life.
"Hey, um. How'd you find this place anyway?" Feeling a need to say something, Kyouko hesitantly broke the awkward silence, though it only served to make the atmosphere even more awkward.
"Weeeeelll, long story short, a certain Ms. Know-It-All brought me here," Sayaka responded before she could stop herself. Figuring that it was too late now, she figured that she may as well continue. "Or to be more exact, she abandoned me here to rot and die. Which reminds me, curse her."
"Ah, now I get it." As soon as the redhead heard that description, she crossed her arms and nodded in understanding, as if perfectly understanding the situation now. "Yeah, nothing about that girl ever makes any sense. Figures that she'd pull something like this on me… Dammit, Homura."
"I know, right?"
"Yeah."
"Yep."
"…"
"…"
"…So, uh."
"Mhm?"
"What's that plastic bag you're holding?"
That question hung in the air just as the elevator made a light 'ding!' noise and opened up to reveal a carpeted hallway with a line of doors on the left side decorated with number plates, and a long windowpane on the right stretching towards the end, with a wide view of Kasamino City being drenched in heavy rain.
"Err, more importantly. Why are you staying in a place like this?" the blunette asked, in an attempt to change the topic. With a forced smile, she held the plastic bag behind her back and stepped out of the elevator. "Actually, how are you allowedto stay here to begin with?"
"I- I do what I want. Got a problem?" Kyouko replied, averting her gaze to the other side as she did so. Afterwards, she opened the first door to the left and headed in just like that, whilst adding, "Oh, and I um. Kinda hypnotized the staff."
"Wait… Wait wait wait, what?!...hey, wait just a second! Isn't that against the law?!"
Without stopping to think, Sayaka ran into the hotel room after her, closing the door as she did so. At the time, it didn't occur to her that by rushing in so carelessly, she'd lost her last chance at backing out of this.
The redhead flicked a switch on the wall, illuminating the lavish room. Or at least, it would've been lavish had everything not been so messy, since it looked like a whole parade of animals had crashed here only minutes ago. But right now, it was the least important thing to complain about. "Um, I don't think so? Does the law say anything about magic?"
"I don't know! But that doesn't change the fact that it's still bad!" Sayaka protested, unable to just let a matter like this slide. To be honest, she was actually a little hurt at this, since after all they'd been through, she was still up to the same old tricks. "Jeez, I thought you'd stopped doing things like abusing your powers!"
"But…" Letting out a pained sigh, Kyouko sat on the nearby bed and faced her directly with a serious look. "Where else do you expect me to stay, Sayaka?"
"Well, that's…" The blunette raised her voice to answer, but somehow, found that she couldn't. For whatever reason, the words were stuck in her throat. Or maybe she couldn't find any to begin with. "That's…"
Of course, it hadn't actually occurred to her before, where that girl normally stayed. She'd always just assumed that maybe she had a house of her own or was staying with a relative or something like that, but now that she thought about it, none of those things made any sense at all. After all, Kyouko had always been living on her own will and strength for what might've been months if not years, never receiving any support from anybody, and as for her family…
Well, thinking about it that way, the only two options were that she either slept on the streets, or used her powers to stay in someplace more comfortable like a hotel. And the latter was definitely a lot more preferable to the former, considering her exaggerated personality.
"Besides, didn't you wonder why I returned to Kasamino in the first place?" she continued, her gaze drifting off into the distance.
"I… I dunno, I just assumed you were done with your business…" Sayaka said, though her voice was filled with uncertainty, her annoyance fading away.
"Well, I guess there's that, but also, it's…um, Saint Valentine's Day, right? The day you're supposed to show your appreciation to the people closest to you by giving them chocolate or, or something like that. That's cool and all, but for me, it's just kinda lonely. It's just such a depressing day that I can't bring myself to eat anything sweet since it'd feel wrong. And I bet you lot all had your hands full today too. So… Yeah." As the words came out of her mouth, her gaze drifted off into the distance, as if reminiscing about a happier time in the past. It hurt pretty bad to see her like that.
"I'm… I'm sorry to hear that."
"Yeah, um, it's all cool." Having seemed to realize what she'd been saying, she smiled embarrassingly before looking back up. "Oh yeah, speaking of which. Since today's Valentine's, did you actually give chocolate to someone?"
At that, Sayaka froze.
Snapping her back to reality, she immediately remembered the original purpose for her being here.
"Um, yeah. Right, about that."
Her expression changed, first to a worried look, then to a frown, and then finally to a nervous, somewhat reluctant smile.
Um, uh, okay. Think. Okay, she doesn't know anything about what happened today so I should just- "O- o- of course! Just who do you think I am? There's no way I'd ever let an opportunity like that go to waste, right? I spent the whole night preparing chocolates, and then I went up to Kyousuke-kun and gave them to him!"
…
Wait.
Only a second later did she realize that, in her nervousness, she just totally messed up what she'd been planning on saying. A crack formed in her head. Did she…did she just ruin her last chance by blurting everything out like that?
"Hm, right. That's like you," Kyouko agreed with a nod.
"Yeah! I know, right?"
Oh no.
No. No no no no, please, god, no. Just, just no. Come on. Maybe it's not that bad, but OF COURSE IT'S THAT BAD DAMN IT WHY DID YOU HAVE TO TELL HER THAT? And to think I came all this way- gah! Gah, gah, gah, gah!
God damn it, after coming all this way, it's all ruined now! Gah!
Somehow, all of this must be Homura's fault!
Due to having blundered badly, the calm, confident composure she'd been maintaining over the past few minutes was starting to crumble. Now what? Now what was she supposed to do? How was she supposed to backtrack on her words after having already admitted that she'd given someone else chocolate already?!
This wasn't how it was meant to be at all. It didn't mean a thing that she spent hours searching in a race against time. It didn't mean a thing how, by some strange miracle, she ended up all the way from Mitakihara, bringing along all her leftovers. It didn't mean a thing how she truly felt. She thought she might've had a chance, that the mistake she'd made could still be reversed, but no. It was too late now. Far too late.
The plastic bag she'd been holding behind her back, the one that she'd risked everything just to bring here, was dropped, hitting the floor with a thud.
Left without a choice, she kept on smiling and forced herself to speak, no matter what, even if it wasn't what she wanted to say. Even if it only made things worse. Even if it hurt. "Y- y- yeah! Kyousuke-kun was so happy he ate it all!"
No, he wasn't.
"I was scared at first, but then I was really relieved when he accepted it!"
For about two goddamned seconds, yes. Then I realized what a fool I'd been for the past several YEARS.
"I mean, he was so, so happy,"
That's a lie. He didn't care. He just treated it like some dull surprise and went on like nothing had happened.
"And appreciated my gift a lot…"
What a joke. What an absolute joke.
"Yeah, that's all I ever wanted."
Was it? Was it really?
"So, I…"
Was something as stupid as that what you really, REALLY WANTED ALL ALONG, MIKI SAYAKA?!
"So t- t- that's w- why, I…!"
"Sayaka." Before she'd realized it, the warmth of two arms had pulled her into an even warmer embrace, like a hearth. Her eyes opened wide in surprise at this sudden act, caught off-guard, but quickly found all her energy draining away, unable to put up a protest against this comfort. The redhead held her closely with a serene expression. "You're so easy to read it's almost laughable."
"K- K- Kyouko…!" Unwillingly, tears started to well up in her eyes, and all attempts to hold them back were apparently futile as they flooded out, drifting softly down her cheeks. Unconsciously, her arms began to rise up and wrap around her back in return, burying herself against her shoulder as a greater onslaught of tears came about.
It was only to be expected, her mind had been so occupied with emotion in the past hour that there'd been one crucial thing that she forgot. The most crucial thing too.
The reason why they became such close friends, and the reason why she liked this girl in the first place—
"K- Kyouko, you know, the truth is…!"
"Yeah. I get it."
With a smile, Kyouko hugged her tighter, as though to tell her that everything in the world was going to turn out alright.
"You don't need to tell me. Idiot."
—it was because, more than anyone else, Kyouko could understand how she felt inside her heart. So things like pretending and lying, all that kind of stuff was pointless when it came down to it.
How did she ever manage to forget something so important?
"A- a- a- and…"
"Yeah?"
At this point, salty tears were streaming out uncontrollably, senselessly, soaking Kyouko's shoulder, but she was probably wet already just by being in such close contact with the still-drenched Sayaka so it couldn't have made that much of a difference. It was ridiculously embarrassing, and she didn't really have much of a reason for it either, but it couldn't be helped.
"And that b- b- bag I brought, it's actually meant… Meant for you…!"
"T- that so? Shoulda guessed as much."
Relaxing her grip, Kyouko leaned back a little so that her mouth sweetly brushed against the other girl's ear, breathing softly as she wanted to say something clearly. Then, Kyouko whispered, "Thank you. For coming all the way here for me."
"D- d- dummy, I should be the one saying that," Sayaka muttered back, slightly peeved that she didn't get to say it herself, but otherwise happier than she'd ever been.
Then, as she sunk into her arms, her eyelids slowly but surely began to close, her consciousness gradually fading away. Maybe it was due to exhaustion after all that had happened today, or maybe it was simply due to the fact that this warmth she was feeling was unlike anything else she'd ever really had before.
It was an unfamiliar feeling, yet at the same time, she felt like she should know what it was, because it was something all humans ought to have in their lives. It was the kind of thing that could assure them they could rest easy in peace, without fear or worry.
As she tried hard to think about what it was, like an ocean rushing over to take its place, darkness eventually overcame her senses.
.
.
.
.
"So um, when do I get to try out the chocolates?" Kyouko asked innocently.
Sayaka's eyes snapped back open, and she raised her head with an annoyed look. "Kyouko, you ruined the moment!"
"Oh, well, if you wanna keep on hugging for a few more minutes, I guess that's fine. Sure, let's stay like this. I mean, it's not like our legs'll get tired or anything."
"Urgh, I guess you have a point there."
With reluctance, she released herself from the redhead's hold, and was hit with a wave of tiredness straight afterwards, barely possessing the strength to stand at all. Where'd her energy all go? Or had she been this tired from the start and yet never noticed? Whatever the case, she had to let herself collapse onto the softness of the nearby bed for some relief, though it wasn't nearly as warm as the arms of a human being.
Then, as soon as she landed, she found that she was way too tired to move her limbs anymore. Great. How was she supposed to get home now?
"You could stay here for the night if you want," suggested Kyouko from nearby, having gone to pick up the plastic bag. She glanced into its contents curiously for a moment, causing the other girl's heartbeat to involuntarily beat faster in nervousness, before pulling out a small chunk from within and taking a bite—"W- w- w- whaaaa!"
D- d- don't tell me it was that bad?! I know it's leftovers, but how-
But contrary to her dreadful feeling, Kyouko exclaimed, "T- this is so much better than I expected!" Her eyes seemed to even sparkle in delight as she went over to the bed and sat down besides Sayaka. "No, really, I'm surprised! It's better than anything I've ever had before! Seriously, thanks!"
Ah… That's good. A small smile grew on Sayaka's face as she watched her happy like that. It was a little strange. This wasn't anything like fighting to save others, and yet, she felt so much better from an act as simple as this. All the effort and emotional turmoil she'd gone through to get to this point now felt worth it. It seemed like, just by being able to bring a smile to the ones closest to her, she felt like her existence in this world had some sort of meaning.
If that was the way she truly felt, right from the very beginning, then no wonder it hurt all the time.
"It… It sucks to be alone, doesn't it?" She found herself saying, looking up at the ceiling.
Kyouko's gaze turned to the lying next to her. "It really does."
"But… When I'm with you, I feel different. For whatever reason, I feel…" Now she understood what this feeling was. "I feel like I'm at home."
"…Heh." At that, Kyouko let out a small chuckle.
"W- what?"
"You know what… I feel the same."
Is that so? Just by hearing that, what little worries there was still ingrained inside of the little mermaid knight faded away, the darkness making way for the light, and she snuggled into the covers of the bed.
"I see. Then, if you feel that way too…"
With a dreamy smile, Sayaka's eyes closed, letting herself drift off into the realm of sleep.
"It makes sense that, of all people, I fell in love with you."
She was always so stubborn, tried to meet everyone else's expectations and make those around her feel safe, yet refused to accept that the real reason she did those things was because that was the way she wanted to be treated in return.
And so, that was how it was. Without a doubt, she did not regret what she'd done today.
After all, by some miracle, she'd fixed her mistake, accomplished her dream, and most of all…avoided being an idiot.
It was the fourteenth of February...or, to be more exact, it was around twenty minutes away from the midnight of the fifteenth.
It truly was funny how this day had gone, with her emotions going all over the spectrum. That morning, she'd woken up so excited, pouring all her heart into making chocolates for the boy she thought she had a massive crush on for many years.
She couldn't believe how stupid she'd been. It was true; she truly did like him, but it turned out that it wasn't in thatway. It was only his talent with the violin that she'd fallen in love with, because the music had the power to make anyone happy. She admired that ability to inspire emotion in others more than anything else, and she was one amongst many driven by that feeling.
As for the boy himself though, he was kind, but spoiled, and kind of a jerk too. He'd accepted her chocolates with nothing more than a simple 'thank you' before resuming his violin practice, and she had been but one of many other girls who'd lined up to also give him gifts. When he'd accepted her gift, she'd been so happy at first, but that feeling faded away quickly when she saw how nonchalantly he ate her chocolates.
It had left a void in her heart. Really, one could say that it was seeing him like that that made her realize that there'd been a void in her heart for all these years.
Because of that, this feeling had driven her to come all the way here. She'd gathered up what little leftovers she had left into a plastic bag, scoured the entirety of Mitakihara amidst the pairing feeling, and eventually by some miracle, came across Homura who offered to take her to where she wanted to go.
But of course, she should've known that girl was unreliable, considering that she ended in front of a hotel in Kasamino as soon as they arrived, forcing her to talk to a receptionist who was refusing to give way. After all this, she was being stopped by some stupid regulations – but then again, there was no guarantee that the one she wanted to meet most was even here.
It was hopeless. This was the end. If only she'd realized sooner that the balance between hope and despair was always zero. The more she hoped and tried to accomplish something, the more she would suffer as a result of it. Miracles didn't truly exist in this world. She may have been able to save some people with her wish and powers, but what she'd really wanted all along was something else entirely. As she thought about this, strength slowly started to leave her body, and the plastic bag held in her hands felt like a meaningless weight that wouldn't have done any good either way.
She'd made an irreversible mistake earlier that day, and by trying to fix it, what did she accomplish? Nothing.
How dumb… Well then, guess I should probably lea—
"S- Sayaka?!"
Just as she was about to turn around and leave, her ears caught an unmistakable voice across the lobby.
There was only one person in the whole world who sounded like that!
"Is that…?" In response to it, she immediately towards the source—a girl with fiery red hair by the elevator, wearing denim shorts and a partly open green sweater in such a way that it gave off a careless, delinquent-esque impression that was just as out-of-place in this hotel as her own muddy, drenched self. The girl's brownish eyes were narrowed as if to discern whether or not this was some kind of trick, the look on her face a mixture of disbelief and confusion, and she herself might've been thinking the same thing.
All of a sudden, she became conscious of exactly why she'd come here. With the sight of Kyouko in the flesh, staring straight at her, she felt more nervous than ever, ever before.
"K- K- Kyouko!" Sayaka replied back, putting in more power than she'd been intending. She also sounded shakier than usual, forcing a smile.
"Oh, so you're with her? Never mind then, do what you want." As soon as the receptionist took a glance in the same direction, she appeared to shrug and give up.
"Sayaka, uh… What are you doing here?"
Kyouko walked over towards her, and the closer she got, the harder the blunette found for it to breathe. But it didn't matter—what was important was acting normal. Yeah. Like this was just a random visit out of the blue, something spontaneous that didn't actually mean anything. Hopefully, she didn't look like she was about to burst into tears.
"Y- yo, Kyouko. How's it goin'?" Laughing it off a bit, Sayaka cleared her throat and gave a perfectly ordinary greeting, as if it was just a coincidence that they'd met here, and that it wasn't near midnight in some hotel far, far away from Mitakihara. "Well, as for me, just thought I'd pay a visit and see how you're doing. Nothin' special."
"Really? But it's really late, you… you know?" At a loss for words, Kyouko scratched her head at this bizarre occurrence, but the veteran magical girl then shook her head, figuring that things would make more sense later. "Well, I don't really get it, but uh, maybe we should talk upstairs in my room?"
"S- s- sure."
The two girls made their way over to the elevator, and the top floor was selected before it shut tight with metallic doors to take them to the top, which would take about twenty stories. Compared to the lobby, the elevator wasn't all that special, but with mirrors on all four sides along with the ceiling, it made it impossible for Sayaka to look anywhere without feeling extremely uncomfortable, considering that the reflection in all of them showed her standing side by side with Kyouko herself.
Once again, she found herself having to check whether or not this real. Had she really made it all the way to Kasamino, or was she just dreaming? She had to be dreaming, right? After all, what she was doing right now…it was the stupidest thing she'd ever done in her entire life.
"Hey, how'd you find this place anyway?" asked Kyouko, breaking the silence and serving to only make the atmosphere even more awkward for Sayaka, though she herself seemed oblivious to it. "I mean, I didn't tell anyone, and I'm pretty sure you're not the tracker type."
"Yeeeeaaaah, well, long story short, a certain Ms. Know-It-All brought me here," Sayaka responded before she could stop herself. Figuring that it was too late now, she figured that she may as well continue. "Or to be more exact, she abandoned me here to rot and die. Which reminds me, curse her."
"Ahhh, now I get it." As soon as the redhead heard that description, she crossed her arms and nodded in understanding, as if perfectly understanding the situation now. "Yeah, nothing about that girl ever makes any sense. Figures that she'd pull something like this on me… Sorry for bringing you into this, Sayaka."
"Ha- haha, it's okay."
She was probably imagining the scene wrong though, not that Sayaka was going to go out of her way to correct her. With that matter out of the way, she figured she had to continue the conversation somehow to keep talking, so she decided to say something.
"To be honest though, I was trying to find you." Only a second later did the blunette realize that this was completely the wrong thing to say, and a crack formed in her composure.
"Wait. Really?" Kyouko paused at that sentence and turned to give her an odd look. "Isn't it, like, Valentine's Day? Shouldn't you be with that violinist boy or something?"
Oh crap, I screwed up. I screwed up, I screwed up, I screwed up. Being questioned as the elevator made its way to the top floor, she was beginning to lose her confidence. Her thoughts were scrambling in an effort to figure out a way out of this.
"Ahaha, ahahaha... Well, it's nearly midnight, isn't it? So it doesn't make much of a difference either way, ahaha!" Sayaka stated, in a forced attempt to laugh off the matter.
"Hmm, I guess you have a point."
Then the elevator made a light 'ding!' noise and opened up to reveal a carpeted hallway with a line of doors on , and a long windowpane on the right stretching towards the end, with a wide view of Kasamino City being drenched in heavy rain. It seemed like a rather melancholic view.
Having finally arrived, she let out a deep breath, but she shouldn't have let her guard down because as soon as she did—
"But then what's that plastic bag for?"
At that, Sayaka nearly choked on the oxygen around them, losing her composure for a moment. Like she didn't need another reminder for the reason she was here in the first place. Though she couldn't quite explain it, she felt like the situation was getting worse by the second, an ominous feeling growing inside her heart. But even if things were turning out this way, she still had to keep on trying. She had to press onwards.
The violinist boy, Kamijou Kyousuke, turned out to not be the one she'd liked all along. The truth was that she felt sorry for him, being all alone in that hospital room, and so she'd dedicated everything so that he would be able to smile again and make others feel the same with his talent, but somewhere all the lines, she fooled herself into thinking that she loved him romantically in order to fulfill this task. Her wish had been granted, and now he was able to enjoy life again, surrounded by his friends…
So there was no more need for her to go the effort of caring for him. There was no more need for her to fool herself.
The one she held deep inside her heart was someone, not him but someone else entirely, and that just so happened to be the amazing, beautiful human being standing right before her. That was why she came all the way here. That was why she made it this far. No matter how wrong it sounded, she understood that this was how she truly felt.
And if she missed this chance, she might not have another one. It might eat her out from the inside for as long as she continued to live life as a magical girl.
"Um, yeah. Right, about that." Her expression changed, first to a worried look, then to a frown, and then finally to a nervous, somewhat reluctant smile as she forced herself to speak. "I kinda um, brought it for you?"
Kyouko had been about to enter the door to the left, with her hand on the doorknob, only for her to freeze right there. With her back turned, the expression on her face couldn't be seen.
"Uh, by that… What exactly do you mean, Sayaka?"
"I mean that it's for you," she repeated before she could stop herself.
"Really? It's not a trick or anything?"
"Really really! Um."
"Uhh, okay."
"So."
More confused than ever, Kyouko turned around and tilted her head with a quiet look, not getting it at all. "Sooo…?"
"So here."
"What is it?"
"They're chocolates, of course. I mean. It's Valentine's, as you said. Yay."
"You mean…you came all the way here to bring me chocolates?"
"But you came all this way, and in the middle of the night too… I honestly appreciate it, Sayaka, but I kinda feel bad here," Kyouko said with a halfhearted smile on her face, starting to feel awkward in this situation.
"It's fine, it'd just be cool if you could accept it or, or whatever."
How much more obvious did it have to be made until she got? With each line Sayaka spoke, she felt sicker and sicker, her fists beginning to clench.
Should she have really come here? Or should she have just stayed? This might be a mistake. It might have been the best idea to come here. It might've been better to stay at home, and keep on living complacently as she'd always been. What if she got rejected? Or worse, what if she ended up ruining their friendship this way? What if she'd never come here? What if, what if, what if? Things might've probably been better off that way, but this way, she'd be ruining what little chances she had left. What was she even doing here?!
Calm down, Sayaka.
Focus.
Focus on what you came here for, then leave.
"Sure, but…"
"U- um, but?"
"But I- I mean, why me? Shouldn't you be with that violin boy—?"
…she
couldn't take it
anymore.
"Ugh, enough about him already!"
Just like that, Sayaka snapped, unable to take it anymore. Like a dam that just broke, all her feelings came pouring out.
"It's simple, isn't it?! Over the past few months, after everything we've done together and all the times that you've been there for me, I've ended up falling in love with you, Kyouko, you total idiot! Is that clear enough for you?!" she yelled out, and as each word came out of her mouth, her body was trembling with fear and disgust at herself.
"M- m- me? As in, me?!" Taken aback by the sudden outburst, the redhead blinked multiple times as she took a step back, finding it hard to process this abrupt information. "B- but-"
"Yeah, we're both girls, but so what?! So what if I'm a lesbian?! That's how I feel! I spent hours searching for you and came all the way from Mitakihara to give you a gift for Valentine's, so here I am! I hope you're happy!"
That's… that's not the way I meant to say it.
However, even as she voiced out her feelings, she'd understood that it was all already a mistake judging by how the other girl was reacting. Each word was making the truth more and more apparent. Had she actually been hoping on the smallest chance that her own wrong feelings could be returned? How pathetic. How truly pathetic.
With this careless, blind action, their friendship had disappeared into the air. It was gone. She'd defiled the truly innocent intentions of someone who wanted to help her and asked for something more, something impossible, and she would have to face the consequences of that for the rest of her life. Kyouko might never come back to Mitakihara at this point, having been creeped out from this encounter.
That's not the way I meant to say it…!
"O- okay, hold on, um." Kyouko looked extremely flustered as she tried to come up with a response, not sure what to say after having been confronted with this overly direct revelation. It seemed that she was trying to think of a way to say something without hurting the others' feelings. "H- how should I put this…? Haha, sorry, Sayaka, it's just that this is a little hard to take in…"
That's right. It must've been something completely unexpected for her. Now that she thought about it, why did Kyouko return here to Kasamino in the first place, and on Valentine's Day of all days? If she had to guess, it was probably because she wanted to be alone that day. And yet, she herself had just gone and intruded on her privacy without warning, bringing along an unprecedented, repulsive confession.
Now she knew. This had been a mistake. It had been totally a mistake to come here. She should've known that she didn't belong here, but once again, she'd denied seeing the truth because of her own selfishness.
"It's okay," said Sayaka, hanging her head low.
"Yeah, I-"
"It's okay, it's okay, it's all okay…!"
I should leave.
I should leave now before I make things worse.
"Sayaka?!"
Keeping her breath steady with her gaze turned slightly towards the right, she dropped the plastic bag and summoned up what little courage she had left.
"It's okay…because I'll remove myself from your life as soon as possible. Sorry for taking up to your time."
Then, shutting her eyes tight, the blunette enveloped herself with blue energy which condensed to form a blue-themed outfit, with a long, flowing white cape, a fortissimo-shaped hairpin, and the radiant sapphire gem that was her Soul Gem attached to her belly.
With that, she promptly thrust her body forth towards the right, smashing through the glass windowpane and throwing herself out into the open sky in what was the closest escape route, being drenched in a harsh wave of rain as she did so. Though she hadn't really wanted to damage hotel property, it couldn't be helped.
"SAAAAAYYYYAAAAAKKKKAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!"
Kyouko's voice screamed out behind her, but it faded further and further off as she plummeted straight afterwards, a thirty-five story drop all the way to the bottom that would put an immense amount of distance between them. In most cases, it would be instant death for the individual, though she was different due to being a magical girl. With her powers, things like this meant really little to her. This was just the most effective way of running away.
Once Sayaka was halfway through with her fall, she spun in midair to increase her velocity before kicking off the side of the luxury hotel, launching herself sideways which caused her to reach and ultimately hit the rooftop a shorter building on the other side of the street.
Sliding against the wet rooftop, she was quick to get back up, now totally drenched from top to bottom with grazes all over her skin, looking worse than she'd ever had in her entire life. Not that she minded, since it was a minor cost to pay.
With a satisfied expression, she let out a sigh as she glanced up at the hotel, only for it to change into utter panic as she saw Kyouko transform into her own magical outfit and leap out after her without any hesitation.
S- she's following me?!
I- I- I hadn't thought of that! You dummy! This is for your sake!
Left without any other option, Sayaka turned around and started running, now understanding that this wasn't going to be as simple as it sounded like at first. One foot after another in succession, she came towards the edge of the building and jumped, crossing over ten meters as she did so before landing onto the closest rooftop and racing towards the next. She had to put as much distance as she could between them and lose her somehow. If she did that, then hopefully that girl would just give up and go back home.
'Home', huh.
Knowing that these thoughts would only distract her, she cleared her mind whist moving her legs at rapid speeds that a normal human couldn't dream about, maintaining her cycle of motion, focusing only on the thought of running away. She might've been traveling at about over forty kilometers per hour, and could've gone faster if the concrete surface she was running across wasn't so slippery. In fact, most of her concentration wasn't on actually running, but on controlling her footsteps so that she didn't slip, since it would only take once for the chase to be over considering Kyouko's greater speed and experience.
How long ago was it that Kyubey had told her that she didn't need to feel the pain if that was what she wanted? It was really useful to know that now. Her lungs were on fire and her heart was beating faster than ever, but neither of these things mattered much due to this information. Closing off her bodily sensations to escape more effectively, the scenery blurred past her as she ran on further through the rooftops of Kasamino City, underneath the empty night sky with an absent moon, her path lit only by the city lights below.
She had only one destination in mind, and that was Mitakihara, following the road and landmarks she recalled Homura driving past. Taking less than a split second to glance behind her shoulder to see if she was still being followed, she nearly lost her breath as she saw Kyouko closing in on her with surprising speed, being a lot closer than expected, clearly visible even amidst this heavy downpour of water that obscured visibility. At this rate, there was little doubt that she'd caught.
However, now was the time to put her own skills to the test…!
When Sayaka next jumped to cross the gap between rooftops, she abruptly took out a sword, stabbed it into the wall, and forcefully changed her course to dive downwards. As she did so, she took out multiple longswords and stabbed them into the walls, creating multiple layers of obstacles that'd be sure to slow down her pursuer. Before hitting the hard ground below, she rolled in order to minimize the impact and channeled the energy of getting back up to increase her speed, rushing out into the open streets.
She had to get away. She'd acted like a complete idiot, so she had to get away no matter what, yet that idiot was ruining it all by chasing after her! Now she had no real idea what she was trying to accomplish by running away, but it was too late to back out now. Gah! Gah, gah, gah, gahgaghagaahgageienggenvreivnriovnwovnwrinvow!
"SAYAKA, WAIT—"
"STOP FOLLOWING ME ALREADY!" The girl in question screamed back at the top of her lungs, having moved onto the road to take advantage of all the speeding cars, knowing that most if not all of them would try to stir out of the way.
Even though she couldn't see very clearly with rain constantly pouring onto her face, she anticipated the approach of each car from the front lights and either went to the opposite side it swerved or jumped straight over it, succeeding each and every time. Hopefully, there weren't any accidents as a result of these actions. Though it really bugged her that she was using innocent drivers as obstacles, again, it couldn't be helped. I really am messing with my own morals here, huh? Some hero I am.
Several minutes must have passed, the sound of her hoarse breaths mixing in with the sound of the continuous raindrops that were only growing even more intense, but there was still no sign of the crimson magical girl giving up as fast footsteps followed her every move. It was fairly apparent that this wasn't going to be nearly enough against a veteran who was used to countless situations like this when facing Witches in their lairs.
She needed some better way to lose her, something that she could take advantage of, but the border of the city was fast approaching and would soon be in the open with little left to take advantage of—then, the solution appeared to come to her just as the urbaneness of the city gave away to a nearby massive cathedral in a far more rural area on the outskirts, looking damaged enough that there was a fair chance it had been neglected to decay, left abandoned.
It was spacious enough to run through, but small enough that the corners and rooms could easily be taken advantage of, so it may very well what she needed.
With this in mind, the magical girl zigzagged past the various trees to confuse her pursuer, and then launched herself over the gate, making an abrupt beeline straight towards it once she crashed onto the wet grass, her feet hitting the ground so hard that they were kicking up patches of dirt. Kyouko might've screamed something at her, but she didn't quite hear it as she raced for the main chapel, her surroundings darkening as they went farther away from the city lights. Her destination had no sources of light, so she'd have to rely on a bit of luck so as to get through this.
Even though she'd blocked out her own bodily senses, for some reason, there was a sharp pain starting to grow inside her chest, becoming more painful with every step. She wondered what it was, but knew that she had no time to stop and check out the cause.
Once she reached the entrance, Sayaka thrust all her weight forth and slammed straight into the large dual doors, pushing them open. It seemed that they hadn't been locked to begin with, which helped a lot. Bursting into the darkness of the main chapel interior, the first thing she noticed was a strange dryness in the air, in direct contrast to the heavy downpour she'd just been through. Judging by how the floor and walls seemed…well, long-since scorched, as if there'd been a fire here sometime ago. If there had, it'd make sense that this place ended up being left alone. Apart from that, it might've been magnificent sight with the architecture and stained glass if it were lit. But that wasn't important.
Unable to see very much in the darkness, she materialized her Soul Gem in her hand so its blue glow could light the way for her. Barely making out a door at the end, she ran down the many rows of benches for parishioners to reach it, and then went through into a cloister with hallways running in either direction, both of which led deeper in. Without hesitation, she took the right path.
By now, she must've been in total darkness, and only the glow of the sapphire gem made it possible for her to know where she was going, but she had to keep it dim to make it easier to lose the girl pursuing her. From not too far away, she could hear footsteps entering the area where she'd been moments ago.
"Sayaka! Come on, Sayaka, just stop and listen to me! Please!"
Even with the distance she was putting between them, Kyouko's voice resonated very clearly throughout the whole building, and her determination faltered slightly as she heard the pained tone in the others' words.
It wouldn't hurt if you weren't trying so hard to catch me… You idiot!
Ignoring it, Sayaka passed by different doors, not knowing what any of them were. Prayer rooms or something, it didn't really matter. Blindly navigating her way through, she tried her best to take random turns that would deter Kyouko, but she would need something more concrete. Something that could make her lose this girl for real.
Turning her head slightly to look for something along those lines, her attention was caught as she saw an oddly-angled thin gap in an eastern wing corner, one which she definitely wouldn't have noticed had it not been from that position. It was as though a second building had been built to be attached to it, but the workers had made a slight miscalculation and left this in to make up for it. Knowing that she could use this, a sword formed in her hand and it got thrust in the other direction, its metal smashing into stained glass at the very end that made a really loud sound that caught her pursuer's attention.
"Sayaka! SAYAKA!"
The blue magical girl dimmed her Soul Gem so that it didn't give off any light and squeezed herself into the darkness of the thin corridor, holding her breath so that she wouldn't be seen. Only moments afterwards, Kyouko came into view, and without looking back she rushed in the other direction to follow that sound. It was the most basic trick ever, but apparently it worked.
Now that she'd finally thrown off her trail, she sighed slightly as she turned in the other direction. To go back out would be to risk being seen, so she instead smashed herself through the wall using her own physical strength, triumphantly emerging back out into the open with no one following her anymore—
Or at least that was how it should've been, since instead she ended up back in the main chapel area, at which point various chains shot out from every direction and mercilessly wrapped themselves around her body and limbs, trapping her on the spot.
"W- w- w- WHAT?!" Sayaka cried out in a panicked tone, her eyes widening as she tried to comprehend what had just happened. Though she tried to struggle against the chains and break free from them, it was impossible. In this position, summoning swords to free herself was useless when she couldn't actually hold onto any of them.
Wha- No! NO, NO, NO, this isn't how it's supposed to go!
Quickly afterwards, the chandeliers attached to the ceiling were switched in, illuminating the whole area. It revealed the run-down nature of the interior, with poorly-maintained stained glass, a desecrated floor, hints of cracks, dust, and cobwebs everywhere, and none other than Sakura Kyouko herself, sitting on one of the benches with a sad expression on her face as she returned Sayaka's own desperate look. Her hair and red-themed magical girl outfit was completely drenched, much like herself, but chances were that she cared about a certain something else much more.
"Gotcha," Kyouko said dully.
No. No, no, no, HOW THE HECK DID THIS HAPPEN?!
"H- how did you… I saw you… go… in the other… direction!" The blunette gasped out hoarsely, her throat so dry from all the running that she could barely speak at all. "And how… did you know I'd…?!"
"Rosso Fantasma. I didn't know I could still use that power, but I might not have caught you otherwise. Probably helped that of all the places you could've gone to, it just had to be here, huh. This place, I know every corner about it. It wasn't hard to think about what you might try to do in here and prepare for it, so…"
As her voice drifted off, Sayaka noticed something else, standing out more than anything else, and that was a simple plastic bag plopped right next to the crimson magical girl. She, she actually brought it all the way here? The explanation faded away from her mind as she focused on that more relevant detail.
Why? Why, why, why does that dummy always insist on doing things her own way?!
"You shouldn't have. Idiot, you shouldn't have…!"
"Sorry. Can't help it, that's just how I am." Kyouko grinned widely, as if to demonstrate just how big of an idiot she was.
"Let me go… now! You're just making things worse!" Sayaka screamed at her, closing her eyes tight, unable to bear this anymore. Things were getting worse and worse, and her one attempt to her own mistakes for good just had to be intercepted! What good was this going to do to her? Or anyone now, for that matter?! "This was my own decision to make, and it was all for your sake, so why did you have to stop me?!"
"Isn't it obvious, Sayaka? You didn't let me answer."
"But I get it already!" she complained, as if it should be obvious.
And it had been, hadn't it?
"I'm not completely dumb you know?! I get it, I totally get what you were going to say! I get it I get it I get it I get it I get it! I get that you can't return my feelings, I get that you don't love me too, so—"
"Don't just fucking assume things!" Kyouko yelled back suddenly, now extremely pissed as she got off the bench and made her way over to the chained magical girl, still trying to break out. "That's the thing about you, you always jump to conclusions and make decisions without thinking first! What, you thought I'd be happier or something if you just left my life like that?!"
"YES!"
"WELL GUESS WHAT, YOU'RE WRONG!"
No, she wasn't wrong. She couldn't be. She remembered her reaction not too long ago, and it couldn't have been anything else but the embarrassment and confusion at having someone of the same gender confess their feelings. That was how it was!
"But—" she opened her mouth to voice her thoughts, but was cut off.
All the chains disappeared, and in their place, Kyouko grasped onto her collar, held her up, and stared straight into her blue eye with a look more determined than ever.
Then, right in her face, she voiced out as clearly as possible, "I DO LOVE YOU TOO!"
"Wha…" At first, Sayaka was at a loss for words, losing her breath altogether. Her thoughts, and even her heart stopped, with blood rushing up to her face as she found herself involuntarily blushing. But it didn't take long for her to regain her composure and protested. "Th- that's not true! You're just saying that to make me feel better! If you're not a lesbian, then don't force yourself to—"
"You think that's the only form of love there is?!"
She got released afterwards, dropping back to the ground, but just as she was about to take advantage of this to scramble away, Kyouko's arms forcefully wrapped themselves around her waist, trapping her in a tight, warm embrace from which there was absolutely no escape.
"So, what, you don't love your mom and dad? Your family? And what about your best friends? You're telling me that you don't care about any of them?!"
"T- that's not—"
Sayaka tried to speak, but she found that she'd somehow ran out of breath. Or rather, she couldn't breathe, being this close to the girl she liked most to the point that this unbelievable warmth she could feel was suffocating her in a way.
This was just cheating. It wasn't fair. How could she concentrate like this? It was almost fantasy-like, and truthfully, a part of her just wanted to sink in and just let it all go, but another part of her insisted that this was fake, refusing to accept it.
She tried to make sense of what was being said, but her emotions were going all over the place, interfering with everything. She felt frustrated and extremely humiliated, as well as baffled about everything that was going on right now. Truthfully, she had no idea what she was even trying to say or achieve here, her strong, determined will beginning to crumble.
"That's not what? Important? Of course it's important because, Sayaka, you are important to me! So yeah, I do love you, as the closest friend I've ever had!" The redhead spoke her mind firmly, a bright look returning to her face with each word, making sure that Sayaka would be able to understand what she was attempting to convey. "And not only that, but thank you! Seriously, thank you! Thank you for coming, because um—"
Kyouko's grip lightened slightly, the tone of her voice faltering near the end, and her expression softened tremendously as she made herself admit something she hadn't really wanted to admit. Her eyes even started to water up a little, suppressing back tears.
"—I, I was actually feeling kinda alone the whole day, you know? I used to spend Valentine's Day with my dad, mom, and Momo. Right here, in fact. It used to be a special day, but I came to hate it after what happened. And I thought I wouldn't have been able to bear it if I didn't get anything, so I thought I'd leave Mitakihara for a while… But, because of you, I'm glad. No matter the reason, I'm glad you came all this way to give me a gift. I- I- I was so surprised you came that I had no idea what to make of it!"
For a moment, Sayaka could only stare back blankly, with but a weak grip on the reality around her.
…
… … …
… … … … …and then it all finally clicked together in her mind, causing her to smile without being aware of it herself.
"I see," muttered Sayaka.
"Yeah, right?"
Brightening up a lot at that, Kyouko released her right arm and decided to help her over towards the nearby bench, figuring that she'd be exhausted after that little chase, and indeed, she was, as she collapsed onto it straightaway without much of a complaint.
"Heh… Ehehe…" For one reason or another, the blunette let out a light giggle.
As soon as she sat down, her strength seemed to vanish into thin air, causing her body to fall over sideways without any way to stop it. Before she knew it, she was lying on top of the bench with her head rested on Kyouko's lap, and the latter let out an exasperated sigh.
"We're so far off now we won't be able to get back to the hotel anytime soon, not like this... Seriously, Sayaka, what am I going to do with you?"
Even though Kyouko was complaining, she sounded so happy and relieved with that stupid grin of hers that it was hard to believe.
Just watching her face, Sayaka couldn't help but smile too. It was a little strange. This wasn't anything like fighting to save others, and yet, she felt so much better by being able to keep her company rather than running away. If she'd successfully escaped, then that would've been the mistake since that would've meant leaving Kyouko in a state of panic for the rest of the night, and potentially a long time afterwards until she was finally found.
It seemed like, just by being able to bring a smile to the ones closest to her, she felt like her existence in this world had some sort of meaning.
If that was the way she truly felt, right from the very beginning, then no wonder it was hurting so badly.
"It… It sucks to be alone, doesn't it?" She found herself saying, looking up at the ceiling far high above.
Kyouko's gaze turned to the girl lying below her. "It does. It really does."
"But… When I'm with you, I feel different. For whatever reason, I feel…"
This feeling, this warmth she felt, it was hard to describe. The kind of thing all humans ought to have in their lives, which would always assure them they could rest easy in peace, without fear or worry. But she knew just the right word for that.
"I feel like I'm at home."
It was only natural. After all, the reason why they became such close friends, and the reason why she fell hopelessly in love with this girl in the first place was because of how she was able to understand her feelings so well. So stuff like denial and running away, all that kind of stuff was pointless when it came down to it. Somehow, she'd completely forgotten about that little, crucial aspect.
Whether Kyouko was a boy or a girl, or who knew, maybe even something else, chances were that she still would've fallen in love with her one way or another, because sometimes, that was just the way things worked in real life. There didn't really need to be a reason for it apart from 'I understand you'.
Really, the only obstacle had been the fact that, in the past, she couldn't have brought herself to admit it.
Only under harsh pressure like this could Sayaka let her true feelings be known, because she was so stubborn and so singleminded that she tended to make messier for herself instead of stop and think about a better solution.
"…Heh." Then, Kyouko chuckled slightly. "You know what?"
"W- what?"
"I feel the same."
Her eyes widened in surprise at this, but then relaxed. Of course. Of course that was how it was.
Sayaka was feeling colder by the second, but with her by her side, she felt like she could conquer that feeling. Just by hearing those four words, all the worries still within her were cleansed away, like a burden chained to her leg that had been greatly lightened, and she snuggled into the warmth of this girl's lap without any more fear. Truthfully, she still had plenty of regrets, but it couldn't be helped. She'd just have to deal with them and move on.
"I see. Then, if you feel that way too…"
With a dreamy smile, the little mermaid knight let go of reality and closed her eyes, her consciousness drifting off into an illusionary realm of sleep.
"I guess I've been such an idiot, huh, Kyouko?"
Hah!
Haha!
You thought I wasn't serious about it being incredibly long, but you forgot that it was I, (Merciful I)Dio(t)!
But man, seriously, this is the longest chapter I've written yet, ever. Hopefully, um, you all don't mind this sudden spike. I never really put much thought into how interesting the Sayaka-Kyouko dynamic was, but you know, this was so entertaining to write that I couldn't help it. How scary. To think an improvement in writing skill after a year of absence could also function as a curse…!
Also, for those who noticed, this is indeed a continuation of the one-shot "I Made a Mistake" I wrote. I actually considered deleting that thing and just copy-pasting it all as the intro of this chapter, but then that would've made it even LONGER omaigawd.
Welp, thanks for reading all the way through, and if you enjoyed this particular piece, then feel free to review~ Next up is Madoka's turn which'll hopefully come up in the next four days instead of like, next year. Don't think it'll be as long as this one, but look forward to it anyway!