Kyle* walked to the door of his mansion, the children following him, and he opened it. He most of his friends standing there, most with pretty pissed off looks on their faces.
"Okay, Kyle, why the fuck did your lunatic of a husband take our kids and bring us here?" Craig* asked in his deadpan voice, holding onto his twitchy husbands hand.
"Yea, I swear, Kyle, if he dragged me away from practise I will break his neck!" Stan* said, angry as this was the fifth time Cartman* had pulled him away from training for, generally, mild or unimportant things.
Kyle was about to respond when Cartman* walked up behind him and smiled at their friends. "Hello, Ladies and Gentlemen!"
"Get on with it, you Anorexic Asshole!" Craig* shouted, glaring at Cartman* from the crowd of adults.
"Ha! Alliteration, I can do that too. You, Sir Craig, are a Deadpan Douche!" Cartman* responded smiling at his 'wit'.
Craig* rolled his beep blue eyes, "Just get on with it!"
Cartman* smiled, and beckoned the group into his house. Butters* was standing with the crowd of children, looking nervous as he bumped his knuckles together and his eyes darted from side to side.
"Ladies, Gentlemen, I will now show you something that may shock and disturb some of you. I just want to assure you, though, I didn't do anything this time!" He then clapped his hands and the past children stepped forward.
All of the adults gasped when they saw the child versions of themselves. Stan* and Craig* both turned to Cartman* and glared.
"What did you do‽" Stan* shouted, his fists clenched at his sides in anger.
"Yea, Asshole, what did you do this time‽" Craig* screamed in agreement.
Cartman* raised his arms up and over his head, "Hey, hey, hey! I didn't do anything. At least present day me, I'm pretty sure that past me was the one to send past you guys–es, and female guys–es to the future!"
They then turned to Cartman, who was biting his nails. Once he noticed Stan* and Craig* looking at him, Cartman raised one of his eyebrows. "What? What'd I do‽"
"You sent your entire grade to the future!" Stan* yelled.
"Oh, yea, I did! Hey, wait, where's Mr. Garrison?" Cartman looked around.
Stan* just slapped his hand to his face, grumbling. Butters* walked back into the kitchen with Cartman* following him. A kid with black, slick backed hair, who wearing a button up shirt and black dress pants and shoes walked into the lobby and said: "Follow me to your rooms." He led the group to the right side of the building, headed up the stairs and pulled out a clipboard. They came to the first door, and read out the names: "Craig and Tweek Tucker."
"What about our kids?" Craig* asked, as the kid began to walk away.
The kid turned around, sighing. "They are all staying in one room at the end of the hall!"
"Fine." Craig* said, dragging Tweek into the room.
At the second door the kid read out the names: "Damian Thorn and Pip Pirrup." Then: "Jimmy and Nancy Valmer." Then: "Sally Turner." Then: "Kevin and Esther Stoley." Then, snickering: "Dog–Poo and Emily Petuski." Then: "Jason and Jessie Mullen." Then: "Pete and Kelly Mellman." Then: "Kenny and Butters McCormick." Then: "Wendy Testaburger and Stan Marsh." Then: "Scott and Heidi Malkinson." Then: "Clyde and Bebe Donovan." Then: "Token and Nicole Black." And, finally: "Bradley and Sally Biggle."
Once all of the parents, besides Kyle who was following them, Stan turned to the black haired kid and asked: "Why are you doing this?"
The kid turned to him, "What, take you to your rooms?"
"Yea."
"I need to do some sort of job every week to get my allowance and since I finished my dinner first I was asked to do this." He said, pulling out a keychain and unlocking the door.
Inside the room there was fifty beds, all lined up next to one another. Next to the door was a large T.V., a laptop was attached to it.
"Mr. Cartman said that the girls will be on the right and the boys on the left. Also your dinner is in about…" he looked at his watch, "half an hour. Today is Steak and egg. Salad will be available and yada yada yada." He left the room, closing the door and heading off with Kyle back to the dining room.
Once the door was closed, Cartman left, though no one else noticed, picking their beds.
Almost no one talked to each other, creating an awkward silence. That silence was broken by the door opening and Cartman* coming in. He was holding one pile of silk pyjamas and one pile of other pyjamas. He placed the two piles down and said: "God, you're all quiet!"
"Yea, Cartman." Stan said, now laying on his bed and searching his pocket for his phone.
"Ok, anyway, dinner's in twenty five minutes. You can, you know, look around and stuff, or whatever." He turned to walk away but turned around quickly and said: "Just don't go down to the underground level under any circumstance!"
He then walked away and slid down the banister, laughing.
"Jeez, Experiment, your dad is a lunatic!" Zachary Donovan said, hopping off his bed, looking out of the window at the end of the room and calling all of the boys over.
Lola rolled her eyes and walked out of the room, causing Kyle to follow her, for some reason he didn't know. Lola walked down the hall to a room, opened the door and walked in.
Kyle slowly looked in through the key hole. He saw a relatively large pink and purple room with a relatively large bed. There were three book cases, each with five shelves. Each shelf was full of books, all ordered alphabetically.
Lola sat on her bed, reached under her pillow and pulled out a stuffed green frog. She smiled at it, then hugged it. The green frog had a load of stitching on it. The frog reminded Kyle of something, he just couldn't put his finger on it.
"Clyde Frog!" Kyle said, snapping his fingers.
Lola threw her frog onto the floor in surprise. She slowly walked towards the door and opened it slightly, looking through the crack at Kyle.
"Hi, err… dad?" Lola said through the crack.
"Hey, Lola." Kyle replied, rubbing the back of his neck.
"Err… what do you want?" Lola asked, opening the door all the way.
"Well, I just saw you leave and followed you. Do you have a stuffed green frog in there?" Kyle asked, obviously already knowing the answer.
Lola sighed and lowered her head. "Yea."
Kyle walked past her and picked up the frog. "Did your dad give this to you?" Kyle asked, handing the frog back to Lola.
She smiled at it, "Yea. He said he was given to him when he was born."
"The last time I saw it, it was ripped up and being put underground." Kyle said, remembering when Cartman 'killed' all of his toys, kinda losing his mind.
"Yea, dad said he ripped him up and left him underground for about a week, but then dug it up when he was scared. He got my grandma to sow it back up. He gave it to me when I was three." She smiled.
Kyle smiled and the turned back to her. "Why'd you come over here?"
Lola looked up from the frog, "It doesn't matter."
"No, come on, I'm your dad, ain't I?" Kyle asked, smiling and wanting to know why she came here, though he didn't know why.
Lola smiled back before looking down and saying: "Whenever anyone calls me 'Experiment' I just feel like you and dad didn't want me. But whenever I see Clyde Frog, it just makes me feel happier!"
Kyle frowned, getting up and walking out. Just before he left, Kyle turned back and saw Lola hugging Clyde Frog extremely tightly.
Cartman* placed the knives and forks onto the table, and then turned towards Stan* who had just entered the dining room.
"Hey, Cartman, what's for dinner?" Stan asked.
"Steak. Wendy's a vegetarian, right?" Cartman replied.
"Yea."
"Okay, sweet, that's what I thought." Cartman responded, walking over to him.
A sudden bang caused Cartman to jump up, screaming. He landed in Stan's arms, who just looked down and frowned at him while Cartman smiled.
"Hi." He said before being dropped onto the floor by Stan.
Kyle came running in, panting. "What happened, Eric?"
He pulled himself off of the ground and said: "I don't know, but I'll check my lab."
Cartman* walked into his elevator and pushed the button which sent him down to his lab. Once the door opened, he saw Cartman on the floor, holding his time machine in his hand.
Cartman* walked over to Cartman and picked him up, though he struggled, and dragged him to the elevator. When it opened he threw Cartman at the ground. He saw that most of the kids and their parents were looking at him and Cartman as the latter pushed himself off of the ground.
"What did Cartman do this time?" Stan asked Cartman*.
"I dunno, he was in my lab doin' shit with his time machine." Cartman* replied, and walked away. Cartman got up and rubbed his head, stumbling and hitting the wall.
"I was trying to fix my time machine!" Cartman said and fell over.
Ten minutes later the dinner table was set up. All of the plates besides three had a large steak and one or two eggs on them. The middle of the table was full of dishes which had a large array of vegetables, condiments, sauces and a large chocolate cake. The three plates that didn't have a steak on them had a salad. They were for Wendy*, Lola and Cartman*, all of whom were vegetarians. The group all sat at their designated seats, with Cartman* at the head of the table. They ate in silence for about five minutes before Kyle shouted: "Stop kicking me, Fatass!"
"I'm not fucking kicking you, Jew boy!" Cartman screamed in response.
"Yes you are!" Kyle shouted back, kicking Cartman from under the table.
Cartman grabbed his fork and jabbed it into Kyle's side. "No!"
Kyle pushed Cartman off of his chair and Cartman responded by pulling Kyle off of his chair. Kyle fell on top of Cartman and he punched him in his face. Cartman grabbed Kyle's collar and threw Kyle off of him. Kyle* Stan and Stan* stood up to pull them off of one another but Cartman* raised his hand to stop them. He smiled as he remembered the last time he and Kyle had one of them fights. After a minute he let them stop them from fighting.
The group continued to eat in silence for the rest of the meal. After they were done, the kids were led by Cartman* back to their room. He opened the door and told them to all put on their pyjamas. Surprisingly, despite all of the pyjamas being the same size, Cartman was able to wear his pair. Cartman* told them to get into bed and then shut the light off. But, before actually leaving, he said: "You can talk to each other all you want, I was just told by your parents to take you to bed!"
A/N: Sorry it's been so long since I updated and I know this isn't the best chapter. I've just been preoccupied recently.
I'll try to make the chapters in the future better.