Chapter 6

15 February 2012

Next morning it was the shrilling noise of her phone alarm that woke Kotoko up. She woke up groggily and was a bit surprised to realize that she was sleeping on the couch. Why wasn't she on her bed? As she became aware of her surrounding,images from last night assaulted her mind. Did she really kiss Kin-chan? What is wrong with her? The noise of pots and pan clattering in the kitchen filled the room and she realized that not only she kissed him but she asked him to stay with her as well. What was she going to do now? Is Kin-chan going to think that they will start dating after last night? Isn't that what she expected when Irie-kun kissed her? Being faced with so many conflicting feelings and questions was definitely not a good way to starts one's day.

Kin-chan cheerily entered the living room. He carried with him coffee and breakfast for Kotoko. He wanted to start this new stage in their relationship in the right way. He had wanted them to have their own little improvised version of breakfast in bed. Kotoko was sitting up and looked in deep in thought as he presented her with the food. "Good Morning, Kotoko!" Kin-chan cheerfully greeted Kotoko. All Kotoko could to do was grunt out a greeting back as little people ran around smashing things around her head. Her hangover from hell made normally loud Kin-chan's voice reach an ear-splitting intensity.

"Ah! Kotoko-san is hungover. Don't worry I have plenty of greasy food, juice and coffee. My food would soon work its magic , so come on eat up." Kin-chan whispered all this in a surprisingly gentle manner for him."

"Thank you, Kin-chan. You are so good to me.I am very grateful." Kotoko said all this with her head down and guiltily looking down at her hands as she was embarrassed to look at him after last night. "I believe I have been very unfair to you. Last night…" Kotoko shakily continued speaking but before she could complete her sentence Kin-chan cut in between "Kotoko-san can never be unfair to anyone and last night was perfect. Anyway, I have apologize Kotoko-san as I have to leave. Chef called me before you woke up. He needs me to go pick up the ingredients with him today."

Kin-chan left soon after and Kotoko was left unsettled. She had wanted to clarify that the kiss was a huge lapse of judgement on her part. She wanted to explain how lonely she was feeling last night. But all this was left unsaid and Kotoko felt even worse. She knew longer the things went unexplained the worse Kin-chan would feel. She still could not believe that she had been so callous as to kiss Kin-chan when she knew it in her heart that she could never look at Kin-chan in a romantic manner. She simply wasn't attracted to him in that way. It was sobering realization for Kotoko that Kin-chan was to her what probably she was to Irie-kun. Yet, this same realization made her want to do better and treat Kin-chan better than how Irie-kun had treated her but then she went on and kissed him. She gave him false hope, a dream she knew that can never come true. As she got up to get ready for college she wondered how will she ever repent her sins against Kin-chan.

At the end of the day as Kotoko dragged her tired body back home she looked back at the disaster of her day. Due to the rollercoaster that was her life currently she had been more prone to day dreaming today and had lost her head several time in class as well at work. She had gotten scolded at both the places and one of the kids almost got hurt because of her absent-mindedness. She was saddled with even more guilt after that and thus, a guilt-ridden Kotoko had decided to look for Kin-chan at Aihara ,after she logged out from her work at 7 in the evening. Though she couldn't find any relief from her torment as she got to know that Kin-chan had to go back home suddenly after getting a call informing of his nephew's birth. She was also embarrassed to find out that earlier today Kin-chan had gleefully announced to all his friends at work about their kiss. Even her Dad had asked her if she had finally given into Kin-chan's persuasion. She claimed it to be just a misunderstanding and though she could see his Dad didn't truly buy it ,he thankfully decided not to push it further.

As she had sat there contemplating the crazy mess she had made of her life she had looked up at her father who had been wearily working down the counter, clearing everything up. Looking at him brought to mind the engagement party and she had weighed in her mind the question that was at the tip of her tongue. Should she or should not ask about it? Ultimately her curiosity had won and she had asked her father about.

Shiego had looked at his daughter's peculiar expression while working and realized that she must be wanting to ask about last night and when the question finally left her mouth he didn't know what to say? He finally saw her moving on and he did not want her to get caught up in her fantasy world again. So he settled the matter saying that it was a very beautiful party and that he enjoyed himself. Well, it was not a complete lie he argued with himself. He just left out some stuff. Kotoko had sensed that there was more to it than what her father was sharing but believing that it was stuff she probably didn't want to hear in the first place she had given up the line questioning. She soon after she left the place ,both of them hiding facets of truth from each other.

What a fruitless day it had been ,Kotoko thought to herself as she climbed the stairs to her apartment. When she reached her floor she was surprised to find an unexpected visitor. What was he doing here? This day keeps getting crazier and crazier. Kotoko walked up to the person fallen asleep at the foot of her door. As she got closer to him ,she realized how haggard he looked. His clothes were all rumpled. She had never seen Irie-kun so disheveled before. As she woke him up she noticed with a gasp the deep dark-circles underneath his eyes.

Naoki was surprised to find that he had fallen asleep, but then again it was given that he would succumb to exhaustion after being awake for the better part of the last 48 hours. He knew that this discussion could probably have waited but when he overheard Kinnouske blabbing all about finally winning Kotoko's affection at the restaurant and he couldn't stop himself. After that his feet automatically carried him towards an address that he had memorized secretly after he heard his mother discussing it with his father. Now, as he stood in front of her ,his uncharacteristic behavior finally seemed to have caught up to him and the realization that anything he says now would be completely out of the line had him fumbling for words. But before he had even began thinking what to say Kotoko had started speaking.

"Irie-kun ! Are you alright? Are you hurt? You look so messed up. Come on in. Let me look at you in a better light." Kotoko dragged him inside and then in the light of her apartment gave him a once over. "You don't look hurt but let me get you something to drink. Sit Irie-kun, sit." Kotoko's nervousness and her shock at Irie-kun's state temporarily overcame whatever anguish and pain she carried in her. When she walked in the room she was mesmerized by his presence. Even tired and unkempt he looks so beautiful thought Kotoko wistfully.

Kotoko placed his drink in front of him and sat down with her own. As the two sat looking at each other the air got heavier with awkwardness and tension. Kotoko had this overwhelming urge to hug Irie-kun but she knew it would be beyond inappropriate. So to change the atmosphere ,Kotoko steeled herself and with a false cheerfulness asked "So Irie-kun how was the ceremony yesterday? I am sorry I couldn't be there but I bet Sahoko-san looked amazing."

"We broke up. The engagement did not take place yesterday" Naoki replied calmly. "Sahoko-san refused to get married."

"Wahaa…What …but why? She liked you. How could…could anyone say no to you?" Kotoko was flabbergasted. She simply couldn't understand why anyone would not want to marry Irie-kun.

"Anyway, my relationship might have gone south but I understand you have found some romance in your life. I didn't realize that you would get over your years long love with me so soon." Naoki's expression was something that Kotoko had never seen on his face before. He was angry but he looked so broken.

"Han? What are you talking about?" Kotoko asked in stupor, her single minded focus on him made her oblivious to anything but Irie-kun.

"You kissed Kin-chan, didn't you? Naoki asked confusedly. For a moment looking at Kotoko he thought maybe that Kinnouske was lying but then he saw the realization dawn in Kotoko's eyes and Naoki was faced with truth of the information that up till now his mind had refused to believe. Naoki was sure that he just heard his heart break.