Chapter Three: "It's a beautiful day to save lives."

She stared into clear blue eyes. She saw drive, excitement, and compassion in them. She saw Derek. She knew he was her son, even if most of her memories of him were when he was a little boy. She could look at him on a good day or a bad day and her damaged brain would know that the man she was staring at was Derek Bailey Shepherd. She could remember having him like it was yesterday.

"He's perfect."

Meredith cried at the sight of Derek holding their newborn son.

"He's just perfect."

"What are you doing here?" Meredith asked, "Are you crazy? Don't you have scut to do or something?" She surprised herself, and Bailey, at her ability to remember the fact that he was a surgical intern. She was having one of her better days.

"Mom!" Bailey pushed passed her and into her apartment, "I found something. I'm so excited. You're going to love it."

"What is it?" Meredith eyed him questioningly. She never did like surprises, but these days she hated them even more than she used to.

"It's you and dad." Bailey pulled out a couple of DVDs, "Operating. Together. I found them in the archives at the hospital. I thought you would like to watch it with me."

Meredith stared at the objects in her son's hand. She couldn't identify the feeling they brought her. Maybe she was nervous. She couldn't decide. She wasn't sure what she was about to see.

"I can't remember operating." Meredith finally whispered and then looked into her son's eyes, "I'm a surgeon."

Bailey nodded. She said it more as a reminder, a stament, rather than a question.

"We don't have to watch," Bailey surrendered, "I just have the day off and I should study. What better way to study than to watch two brilliant surgeons operate all day?"

Meredith offered a small smile, "We can watch."

"I brought popcorn." Bailey flashed his mother's smile.

She saw herself in him too. He was a perfect mix. She smiled back and led him to the couch. She grabbed one of the DVDs and hesitated as she opened it. 'It's okay.' She told herself, 'There's nothing to be afraid of.' She exhaled and pressed play when the DVD retreated back into the DVD player.

Bailey moved a pillow so Meredith could sit next to him. She plopped down and hugged the pillow to her chest as a crowded operating room appeared on the television screen.

"Ok everybody." Dr. Derek Shepherd sighed deeply, "It's a beautiful day to save lives. Scalpel."

Meredith stared in awe as Derek's voice came through the speakers. There he was. Derek. He was in his element. He wore his ferryboat scrub cap. She felt tears spring into her eyes. She saw herself standing next to him. She looked so young. She was an intern. She felt Bailey's hand squeeze hers.

"You okay?" Bailey asked as he saw a tear slip down her cheek.

Meredith nodded, "He's so good. I don't remember this. I just remember that he is extraordinarily good. He loved his work."

Meredith caught herself. 'Loved?' She thought, 'Why would you say that? Where was Derek?' She shook her head. She was confused again.

"Mom. You are extraordinary too. You were both beyond brilliant. I'm so proud to be the son of two amazing surgeons. I have so much to learn, but I want to follow in my parents footsteps." Bailey told her, "Getting the chance to watch surgeries like these. It's a gift."

"I'm proud of you Bailey." Meredith squeezed his hand back, "You're going to be a good surgeon. A brilliant one. Don't ever give up. It's going to be hard. But don't ever give up."

"I'm going to have it all... Like you and dad." Bailey smiled, "I'm going to be brilliant. Have a great career, love, a wife, and a family. I want to build a dream house like the one we used to live in. I want it all."

"Dream house." Meredith whispered.

"Take a look at the shirt I bought Zola. It's in the bag on the counter." Meredith told Derek as he walked into the kitchen towards the refrigerator.

"Guys don't get all goo-goo over baby clothes," Derek sighed but turned around towards the counter.

"Just look," Meredith demanded.

Derek pulled the pink shirt out, "What is this?"

She watched him read the front of the shirt and then look at her. He turned it around and held it up for her. She smiled at him.

"It's only three weeks, so I shouldn't even be telling you. I mean, I still have a hostile uterus and terrible things are constantly happening to us, which is why I haven't told anyone. I haven't even told Christina. So, if you tell anyone, I swear I will kick you out of this house… that you built."

Derek walked towards her, "Don't worry… And good things happen to us. We're gonna have another baby." The smile she saw on his face was priceless. He kissed her.

"We're gonna have another baby," She laughed as she repeated him and sealed it with a kiss.

Meredith looked at her son, "Bad things are constantly happening to us."

Bailey let his eyes fall to the floor, "Mom, I'm sorry."

She shook her head, "I don't want you to be like me… thinking the world is out to get you. Maybe it is. Maybe it isn't. I think it is definitely out to get me… but…. you're bright and shiny. Like you're father. I want you to be bright and shiny. Brilliant. You can be the sun. Don't ever let anyone tell you differently. Be positive…. you'll have to fight like hell, but you can have it all."

"And good things happen to us."

She heard Derek. She always heard Derek.

"Good things happen to us." Meredith nodded, "That's how your dad sees the world. Be that way."

Bailey stared at his mom and then smiled as he quoted his father, "It's a beautiful day to save lives."

Meredith felt the tears again. Those bastard tears, but these tears felt more on the happy side of things, "That's right," She nodded and swallowed the lump in her throat, "Always."

She hugged Bailey, thankful for his existence, "I love you."

"I love you too mom." Bailey whispered as he hugged her back.

Meredith closed her eyes. She was in the operating room. Ferryboat scrub cap. She was remembering. They stole glances at each other.

'It's a beautiful day to save lives.'