Chapter 66

-"Jasper, she's fine. They told me that she could go home. So I'm taking her home…. Yes….Don't worry baby we'll be there soon"- She hangs up the phone and looks over to me while we wait for the green light.

I feel like a child, her eyes are searching; I can feel her anger and at the same time the worry and sadness. But she doesn't question me. She just holds my hand and smiles sadly at me.

I'm settled in to the room.

Jasper broad my stuff here and put my bags on the chair over by the window, he doesn't say a word; he just smiles politely but doesn't meet my eyes. I don't know what Alice has told him or why she had to go to Tijuana, Mexico to come and get me, he had to sign the papers too, so he must have a clue.

When we crossed the border to the US, there was a wait of almost two hours, and we spend the whole time talking about her kids, well she talked I listen. I was afraid that if I made any kind of comment she would start her questions. I still don't know what happened, I don't remember much of the month in that place or the few days before everything happened.

I'm tired and hungry. So I sit on the edge of the bed and watch as Jasper comes and goes moving my thing into the closet and moving furniture around for when he comes in with a television set.

I know he's curious as to how long I'll be staying with them, but I still don't know.

Night falls and I'm in bed, I can hear the quiet of the house, the kids are asleep, David is almost 3 and baby Dallas is 8 months, I made them share a room since I'm sleeping in David's.

His small bed is comfortable and his toys are sitting on several shelves on the walls. The soft blue paint on the walls is soothing, the big letters spelling out his name with brown paint are in a beautiful script, Alice is very gifted in the whole decorating thing, she'd always love to do that, I remember her always cutting fabric and making things in that little doll house. And now she can do that for her own home.

Alice and Jasper's home is small but very comfortable. They started out in a small apartment, that's where I had visited them; Jasper works in construction and is going to school during the afternoons to get a degree in psychology, it's a little unnerving since everytime he looks at me I feel like he's analyzing me..

Alice decided to be a stay at home mom, but when she got pregnant with Dallas, she knew that she had to help out but didn't know what to do with David, she didn't want him in daycare, so while taking some courses in the local family center during the mornings sort of like a mommy and me thing with David. The instructor asked her if she wanted to take a course for child care. To which Alice thought it to be a great idea, so after convincing Jasper, they moved in to a house and when Alice finished her thing she started her own day care center. She takes care of 8 kids between the ages of 3 and 10, since she's always been so hyper and creative; it's all a piece of cake to her. Jasper is the one that has to work for it, since he comes home dog tired and sometimes there's still kids running around going crazy in there backyard. Alice had Jasper build her a dance studio in the basement; she made it sound-proof so that she can have all the kids going crazy down there while her own have naps or Jasper can relax.

I felt tired after her explanations and the catching up we did while we ate dinner. They kids where smiley and happy, they are beautiful, and David is the spiting image of his dad, right down to his passive deminer. There expression and mannerisms are so much alike that it's even funny watching them. Dallas is a great mixture of both Jasper and Alice, she has Alice's eyes, nose and hair, but her lips and mannerisms are totally Jasper.

Her smile is Jasper's too, and when anyone speaks she stares intently as if she understands every word and is just waiting for her turn.

They are beautiful and together they are the perfect family. I envy Alice, she has everything. I feel sad that I'm disturbing her life with my problems, I feel angry that she has to worry about me.

The two dogs in the small backyard start to wane and whimper, the cat sleeping in the living room is hissing. I can hear little David talking in his sleep, he giggles and sighs.

And then I feel it, the darkness of the room is oppressing and I feel the heaviness of my thoughts.

It's here.

It found me again.