Chapter 5: Artemis the Great and Powerful

A/N: A belated Happy Holidays, Fowl fans! I haven't been posting for a while, I know; there wasn't any internet access where I was. Sorry! So here's the next chapter!

I stalked down the winding corridors of Fowl Manor, ignoring the many security cameras. I was still fuming at Mulch leaving me to be caught by Artemis, Artemis locking me in a basement room, Foaly blowing up my iris-cam, and all the other various mishaps that had befallen me in Fowl Manor.

I stopped at a plated window and gazed outside. Fairies, not bothering to shield, milled about, talking and hoisting Neutrinos proudly. Right in the middle, barking orders, was good old Briar Cudgeon himself. I sighed and kept walking, up stairs and down stairs, again and again. Finally, I stumbled upon an imposing, glossed wooden door, with a complicated keypad of numbers glowing and blinking next to it. I groaned and slammed my fist on the keypad. It fizzed and popped. Surprised, I slammed my fist on it again. Some of the wires popped out, and the chip exploded. "I take that to mean I can get in," I muttered, trying the knob. It worked.

Artemis sprung up from his chair. "Butler, our human prisoner has escape- oh."

"That's right, oh," I said comfortably, smiling. "Your bodyguard is busy with the fairies outside, and I need your resident elf, so hurry up!"

Artemis raised one eyebrow.

"Captain Short is staying here until I get the ransom gold. You can tell your friends in the LEP that."

"Be that way," I muttered, realizing that there's only one more crazy, rash plan that worked in this situation.

Quick as a flash, I leaped across the room to a long wooden bench where some partly disassembled LEP weapons lay. I grabbed a Neutrino and swung it toward Artemis. It was way heavier then I expected.

"Now, Mud Boy, I want you to give me the code to Holly's cell, get down on the floor with your hands behind your head, and sit there like a good little boy."

His mouth twitched in something resembling a smile.

"Really? You are not much older then I, and you are also a human. You most likely don't know how to operate a fairy weapon, so I believe that you're bluffing."

I waved the Neutrino around in what I hoped was a threatening fashion. "Try me!"

Of course, I'd never shot a thing, and I had no idea how to use the weapon, but I was hoping that Artemis doesn't know that.

"I prefer not to hand over the code, thank you very much," he said smugly.

And that's when I slugged him in the face. It was kind of satisfying, you know. Call me violent, but the look of shock and surprise on his face was incredibly fun to watch.

"So, what's the code to her cell? Because there's more where that came from."

He rolled his eyes. "Captain Short is still bound to this house anyway, so you may have your code."

He scribbled something down on a piece of paper and handed it to me.

"Now," I told him, grabbing a tiny earpiece from the workbench, "Playtime's over. Time for the professionals to take over. If you're a good boy, I'll buy you a lollipop when I come back."

As I sprinted out the door, a dazed Artemis Fowl in the office behind me, I reflected, Nothing like a borrowed line.

When I was in a seemingly deserted corridor, I quickly clipped the LEP wings onto the shoulders of my sweater and activated the earpiece that I found.

"Mud Girl to Foaly. Mud Girl to Foaly." I murmured, tilting my head down.

"Receiving. Have you found anything helpful?"

"Yes. The access code to Holly's cell."

I heard a pleased whinny from the other end. "Good. Now, I'm sending some information to your... you don't have a helmet, do you?"

"No."

"Well, just find Holly, and hopefully she'll know the protocols from there."

"Got it."

I switched off the mike and set off at a steady pace toward a flight of stairs I remember there being from the book. Finally, after about half an hour of wandering corridors, I found her door.

I quickly punched in the code and poked my head inside. When my gaze fell on the elf sitting moodily on the bed, I'm pretty sure I audibly gasped. She was prettier, sharper, and more elfish then the books had described. Her hair was an enviable shade of auburn, and her uniform was tight and form-fitting. Her hands were scraped and raw from banging the bed up and down.

"Ahem- um- Captain Short?" I stuttered, hoping that she wouldn't right-hook me.

She turned around, and her hazel eyes flashed as she observed the Mud Girl that was in her cell.

"Get out, Mud Moron, and tell your precious Master Fowl that he should stop sending little girls to check on me."

I gulped. Mud Moron? Harsh.

"Oh yeah," I murmured, half to myself. "Juliet has been here too."

Holly got up from her bed, fists clenched. I shut my eyes quickly, then opened them, and took a deep breath.

"Holly- Captain- I'm from the future, sent here by some kinda- um... machine thing, um, and Commander Root hired me and Mulch to break you out before Cudgeon bio-bombs the place. Please don't sock me, I'm telling the truth. Here, ask the centaur," I said in a breath, tossing her the earpiece. She inserted it skeptically, then listened as a series of muffled whinnies issued out of the little tech. She tossed it back to me after a few minutes and strode over.

"All right, Mud Girl-"

"It's Charlie-"

"I don't care. Let's get out of here."

The first thing I did was hand her the Neutrino. The second thing we did was go back to Artemis's office. One quick shot and the genius was out for the count.

"It was a quick blast, non-lethal. Commander Root might want him for investigation," she explained to me as we dragged the Mud Boy between us.

"What about Butler? And the troll?" I asked, heaving Artemis's lolling arm out of my face.

"Troll?" she asked, alert.

"Cudgeon should be sending in a troll soon. We should get everyone out before that. Butler fights it, but he needs you to heal him... oh gods, we need to be there to help when that happens."

"Fights it? I'm confused. When is this going to happen?"

Suddenly, a crash echoed through the house.

"Holly!" I almost screeched. "Have you completed the Ritual yet? In your cell?"

She frowned. "Yes! I was waiting for Juliet to come in so I could mesmerize her!"

"Well, hurry up! We need to help Butler with the troll!" I shouted, hoisting up Artemis and running down the stairs.

At the main hallway, I dump Fowl on the stairs. Holly was right on my heels, yelling at me.

I spun around. "What?"

"Charlie, what is going on?!" she snapped irritably. I took a deep breath.

"Listen, Holly. I know this for a fact. A troll was just released into the manor. It is meant to kill Artemis and Butler. That cannot happen. You are supposed to fly in and heal a wounded Butler, and help him defeat the troll and send it out of the house on a trolley cart. You have to, Captain. And I will help."

She looked at me for a moment, and for that moment, I was worried that she wouldn't do it.

"Fine. Do we have wings?"

I handed her a pair of DoubleDex wings that I brought from Artemis's room, just in case.

Suddenly, we heard a mighty roar. I gulped, resolve strengthened. "That's our cue."