Auggie and the way into the dark part 3

Auggie stood next to reception desk in the hall, waiting for Emily. This would be his first field trip and he was nervous. He had spent 5 weeks in a hospital and his second week at the rehab facility had just begun. He had not been out for more than 6 weeks and it was his first field trip as a blind man. After two minutes Auggie heard footsteps approaching and then the voice of Emily "Hey, good morning. I hope you had a good night" Auggie turned into the direction of Emily´s voice and she offered him her arm. "Ready for a field trip?" she asked and Auggie nodded although he was rather insecure what was expecting him. He had learned to move around the building with his cane within the past week but going out was something entirely different. At the centre he felt protected and almost everyone knew him but the world outside was not made for people with visual disabilities.

Auggie grabbed Emily´s arm and they left the building. After a short walk along the sidewalk Emily said "Next to us there is a traffic light. Let go of my arm and try to find the curb with your cane." Auggie swept his cane a bit to the right and found the curb. "Listen to the sound of the cars and to the sound of the traffic light. When the lights are green you will hear a buzzing sound. That is the sign that you can start walking." Seconds later Auggie heard a buzzing sound and Emily instructed " feel for the curb again and start walking. I will be right next to you." Auggie found the curb and took a few steps forward. His heart was beating like a hammer in his chest. He was scared to walk right into the dark nothingness before him and almost stopped in the middle of the street. Emily had watched him and said."Keep on walking, I am by your side." When Auggie reached the other side of the street he almost stumbled over the curb. He was sweating and his heart was still racing. "Well done!" Emily said and touched Auggie´s arm in an attempt to calm him a bit. She had realized that he was sweating and slightly trembling. "I don´t know whether I can do that again." Auggie said. "It is so scary to walk and to cross a street without seeing. The noises and voices around distract me, too." "This is your first day out, what did you expect?" Emily replied "I have seen hundreds of people who showed just the same reaction. You don´t have to feel embarrassed or ashamed. This is a completely normal reaction. But in the course of time you will learn how to get around with your cane. It is just a matter of time and practice."

Throughout the week Auggie had a field trip every day. He learned the way to the supermarket, to the bank, to the hair dresser and to the pharmacy. And with each trip he became more and more confident. On Friday afternoon Emily said " How do you feel after this week?" Auggie hesitated a bit before he replied "Well, at first I was pretty scared but as you said before, I regained a bit of confidence with each trip and I feel that I can regain a part of my former mobility as well."

On Saturday morning, when Auggie was on his way back to his room after breakfast, Sandra, one of the other instructors of the centre, approached and said "Mr. Anderson there is a visitor for you." Auggie was surprised. Who could that be? He did not expect anyone. His brothers were all busy and had no time to visit him and his parents were still on their Europe trip. He made his way to the reception desk and was greeted by a familiar voice "Hello Auggie I have been looking for you for weeks. I am glad I have found you now." That was the voice of Erin, the girl he had been dating before he went to Iraq. Auggie was surprised, even a bit shocked. Erin was the last person he had expected to visit him. "Erin? " he said and looked into her general direction with an incredulous expression on his face. "What are you doing here and how did you find me?" Erin stared a bit. Auggie looked just like before. Like on that day when they had said goodbye before he went to Iraq. A white shirt covered his broad shoulders and his brown hair curled slightly around his neck and on his forehead. However, the expression of his eyes made him look different. He looked into her general direction but it was clearly visible, that he could not see her. Auggie and Erin both started feeling a bit awkward. He, because he had not expected her and she, because she had never been around a blind person let alone around a blind friend before."Would you like to accompany me to my room?" Auggie asked and ended the awkward silence. "Yes" Erin replied and then Auggie started to walk, using his cane for orientation.

After a while he stopped, turned to the right, let his cane trail along the wall to find the door and opened it."Come in" he said and folded his cane whilst making his way to the bed. He put the folded cane on the bed and sat down in the chair next to the window. "Take a seat." He said and Erin slowly moved a bit closer. She felt uncomfortable. Not only because they had not met for a while, but also because Auggie was blind now. Erin sat down on the other chair. She cleared her throat and started the conversation "I missed you Auggie. After you went to Iraq you sent me a few e-mails but then there was suddenly no response anymore to the e-mails I sent to you. I was worried and last week I called your brother David. He told me what happened and that you were here now. I miss you Auggie and after I heard what happened to you I wanted to see how you are doing." "It is very nice of you to come" Auggie said. And then he continued "But as you see, I am not the person I was before. I have to start from scratch with my life because the explosion has left me a souvenir and then he waved his hands in front of his eyes.

" Would you like to go for a walk?" Auggie asked. He needed a bit of fresh air and a walk through the park would be just right. "Yeah, why not" Erin replied. Auggie stood, walked over to the bed, felt for his cane, grabbed it and made his way to the door. Erin followed him. Closing the door behind him, Auggie unfolded his cane with a quick movement. Erin watched him and asked "Do you need help?" Auggie turned towards her and answered " Here on familiar ground I feel pretty comfortable. But if you would like to offer me your arm to guide me I would appreciate it." "Okay let´s do that." Erin said but the tone showed Auggie that she felt a bit insecure. Therefore he added. "I will take your arm right above the elbow. You need to walk half a step ahead of me. This way I will notice when you change the direction or when we approach stairs. Touch the back of my hand with yours to let me know where your arm is and I will grab it."

Two minutes later Auggie and Erin strolled through the park. Auggie enjoyed the sunshine on his face, the chirping birds in the trees and the sound of rustling leaves in the wind. After a while Erin asked. "Would you like to sit down? There is a bench over there." "Over there?" Auggie asked and added "Over there does not ring any bells. You have to be a bit more precise." "Yes of course" Erin was a bit embarrassed she had to get used to the fact that visual cues did not work for Auggie anymore. Therefore she said "The bench is about 5 steps to the right." Auggie smiled and said "That a girl!" He found the bench with his cane, felt for the seat and sat down. "How long do you have to stay here?" Erin asked as she had taken a seat next to Auggie "Don´t know yet. This is just my second week here and there is still a lot to learn for me. The most important thing for me will be Braille class. I want to be able to read and write again. But it will take some time to get the hang of it. And then, I will also have to learn some basic things to get around a kitchen without burning or cutting myself." Erin smiled and said "Sounds like a lot of work to me." "Yeah, to me too" Auggie replied. "But I need to learn all that to regain a bit of my independence. My cane skills are pretty good already." He said and waved with the folded cane in his hand. Half an hour later Auggie and Erin returned. When they reached the door of Auggie´s room, Erin asked "Would you like to see me again?" And then she blushed and said "Ah…I mean….do you want me to come back?" Auggie tried to meet her gaze by turning into her direction and said with a smile "Yes, I would like to SEE you again! And by the way you don't have to avoid words like look, see, watch and so on just because I am blind. I also use these words although seeing for me takes places in a different way these days."

Erin placed a kiss on Auggie´s cheek and walked away. Auggie stood there for a few seconds more musing what had just happened. Did he really want to see her again? In fact he did, but he was also scared how a relationship might work. He had already had a couple of relationships including Natasha the Russian computer hacker. But he had not been blind. Now, being with somebody meant, that the partner had to adapt to the circumstances, too. When living with a blind person it was crucial, not to change anything in their environment and of course Auggie needed some help when he went to unknown places. Could Erin deal with all of that? Auggie was not sure.

Two days later

It was Monday morning and Auggie sat in a classroom. He felt like he was going back to the time when he was in the first grade of elementary school. David, the instructor had explained to the class how the Braille six-dot system worked and now they were all supposed to decipher the first Braille letters with their fingertips. Auggie slid his fingers across the page, trying to decipher the first letters. Oh my God he thought. This was really hard work. Would he ever be able to memorize all the different combinations of dots and would his fingers ever become sensitive enough to read all the different letters? David, who was one of the blind instructors at the centre said, that it was only a question of diligence and time to learn Braille and Auggie was determined to give his best to get the hang of it. Now, every evening after dinner, he spent an hour with his Braille books. He wanted to read and write as soon as possible and maybe he could find a job, too.

Auggie was just sitting at his table trying to write down a few words in Braille with his stylus and Braille slate when his cell phone rang. With his right hand slightly extended he walked over to the nightstand and grabbed the phone. "Hey Auggie , how is it going?" That was the voice of Erin. She had not visited him for a while and wanted to talk to him now. "Hi Erin" Auggie said "Nice to hear your voice again." "In fact I am calling because I wanted to ask you something." Erin began "I have not been out for a while and I would love to go to my favourite Italian restaurant again. And I thought it would be nice if you could come with me." Auggie listened to her and hesitated. Then he said "Well….I´d love to come with you. But are you really sure that you want to do that? I mean…you know that I cannot see anymore and to be honest I am a bit scared to be out in public for the first time. I am afraid I might still be a bit too clumsy and I don´t want to make a fool of myself let alone to embarrass you." "Oh come on Auggie" Erin said in an encouraging tone "How would you embarrass me?" I will guide you and let you know what is going on around us. Sooner or later you will have to do that. You cannot avoid public places for the rest of your life because you are blind now." "Maybe you´re right" Auggie said. "Okay! When do you want to pick me up ? " Erin smiled and said "That a boy! I will pick you up on Friday evening at 8:00 and I assure you we will have fun." Auggie ended the call. He would have to buy a new phone, too. Right now he could receive calls but he could not dial a number himself. The touch screen of his cell phone was not accessible for blind people and he always needed someone to dial the number for him or to compose a text message for him. A cell phone with speech control and with a talking phone menu would be next on his shopping list. This list was getting longer and longer since many things now needed to be adapted to his disability. He needed a Braille watch, a talking alarm clock, tactile dots on stove; microwave and washing machine, a talking scale and a number of other gadgets when he wanted to live independently. On the other hand he had always been a tech-guy. He was fascinated by technology and so he was somehow looking forward to trying all these different things.