This chapter is short, but the next couple of chapters will be longer. Phryne and Jack are being stubborn.

Chapter 7: Jack and Phryne Reflect

Jack

Pushing Phryne away gently and very reluctantly Jack gets up. They have to face the day. He checks that the coast is clear, and Phryne walks swiftly to her room, closing the door very gently behind her. Jack rests his head against the door frame for a moment, thinking. He trusts Phryne more than any other person in his life, but what is he going to do about her? His code of honor will not allow him to be sexually involved outside of marriage, and he knows Phryne has no such qualms and is totally anti-marriage. He sighs deeply at the conundrum. He doesn't want to return to a time when they just flirt with each other and share soul touching eye contact, but he can't see a way to move forward. He knows if he rushes her in any way or makes her feel trapped or like he is trying to control her, she will run scared.

Jack grows furious as he thinks again of her father locking her in a cupboard and Rene Dubois daring to crush her with violence. He appreciates her need to banish those haunting memories. His visions of the war haunt him and he hasn't successfully banished his memories either. He wishes he could clearly communicate his understanding to her. Can their friendship survive him saying no to her? Can he continue to play with fire and remain true to his code? Can he allow her the freedom she will die without? Is he able to allow her to take lovers? Fierce jealousy rears its head and Jack sighs deeply. They are at an impasse He frowns, knowing his heart will shatter if a relationship as friends is her decision, but also knowing in his heart he won't be able to give her up.

If friendship is her decision he will learn to live with the restriction for he can no longer envision a world that does not contain Phryne Fisher. "The course of true love never did run smooth" Shakespeare sums up his feelings perfectly. How apropos he thinks also remembering Mrs. Bolkonsky's words regarding his greatest passion and true love. Maybe he needs to stick to ham and mustard pickle sandwiches. They are a lot safer! He hopes that he can wait while Phryne determines what she wants out of their relationship. And that he handles whatever she decides with good grace. The only way he knows is to show her; to wait for her. He sighs again. He can do this. He is a patient man.

Phryne

Entering her room and closing the door Phryne leans against it feeling unsettled. In the past she has always been in a hurry to get rid of her lovers once the passion plays out. She is awed by this desire she has just to be with Jack – in his presence – not doing anything but being together. She doesn't understand. This can't be love. She can't love him. She can't commit to any man, can she? Her mind quickly reminds her that Jack is not just any man, and as she thinks back over their relationship, she realizes the truth of what her mind is telling her. She wonders if Jack will take their relationship to the next level; his code of honor is so ingrained in him that she doubts very much that he can.

She frowns slightly, a small crease between her brows. She doesn't want to think about this right now. Tossing her very tousled black hair as she shakes her head, she moves to select clothes for the day. It is only moments before Dot joins her. Dot noting that Phryne looks tired but less haunted than she has the last few days, helps her dress, filing her observations away to ask Phryne about later.

Jack and Phryne

Phryne and Dot are talking animatedly about the case as they join Jack in the dining room. They have just been seated and are contemplating what to have for breakfast when Constable Collins returns. Hugh's eyes are only for Dot, and Phryne shares an indulgent smile with Jack, who smiles back with his usual half grin. After a hearty breakfast they go to view and catalog the evidence they collected the previous day. As they are going through the pictures, they are able to surmise that in addition to the daughter who is checking on her mother, there appears to be a son, a deceased husband, a daughter-in-law and several grandchildren. Phryne notices something else in the photographs; there appears to be another house that the family owns or frequently uses. There are a number of pictures with this different house in the background. Jack decides that he and Phryne will return to the Kendara Way house to see if they can find out the location of the other home. Dot and Constable Collins are to go to the police station and the hall of records to see what they can find out about the family.

Jack and Phryne are both quiet on the drive, they hold hands, but each is in their own world. Jack is contemplating how to tell Phryne that he won't make love to her – not like he wants or dreams of since they are not married. Can she be content to share kisses and caresses that stop very short of consummation? Can he survive being that close to her and continuing to deny them both? Will she ever see that true love is not a prison? All these thoughts are tumbling about in his head, but he says nothing. He just squeezes her hand a little tighter and gives her a look of deep admiration.

Phryne wonders what Jack is thinking. She knows he is going to be reserved in the light of day, but she also senses great passion simmering beneath the calm exterior. She desires more than his kisses. She wants all of him. She longs to be free to touch him wherever she likes – every day. This thought shocks her. She has never wanted to be with a man long term since Rene totally traumatized her. She glances at Jack, noting his handsome profile and the way he is holding her hand. She isn't sure that she can remain unscathed in his presence. She wants to be free to do whatever she wants, whenever she wants to do it. She isn't going to change because of Jack's antiquated ideas. She is a modern woman after all and, does not need a man in her life except when she decides she wants one. These thoughts do not bring her comfort though. Instead she has a niggling feeling that with Jack things can be different; that she's making a mistake to assume he will bend to her desires like so many others in the past.