Disclaimer: I own nothing but the plot.
Hi! *ducks down for any rocks or rotten food thrown her way* I'm guessing this apology is very needed.
So here goes, I'm sorry, I guess the muse for this story is that I have to be down in the dumps for this to really happen, and I'd been having way too much fun lately so this was sort of put on the back burner, I totally intend to finish this so please no angry messages or reviews, lol!
Anyway I have two more stories I'm working on, but want to have at leased half of them done until I start posting, Thank you to everyone that's still with me on this ride and welcome to all the others that have started along the way. I love hearing about your theories and what ever it is you want to ask or tell me. Ok I think that's enough of my rambling, on to the story!
Chapter 89
Needles and glass;
Barbwire and raw cement;
Splintered wood and rusty nails.
Everything was over.
I had failed.
The mission was forfeited by the weakness and depression of this body I had inhabited. She was too close that she even courted death in her sleep.
The place had reeked of desperation and loneliness, her place of work gave her a respite from her diseased existence, it was cold, almost like a living tomb; the marble the wood, the sparse furniture, it all pointed out to her wanting to lose herself in it and just give in. So my influence and the guidance of the hooded ones had driven her right in to its arms. And again Death had won.
And again I was back, but this time I could see the solitude in this place, the different creatures where not exposed or roamed the rooms. I could only hear the low murmurs and the faint shadows. My senses where again numbed and I couldn't see myself as being anything really. This time around, my flesh was not exposed or rotting; I could feel clothed and saw it when I looked down to examine myself. The black long robs covered me down to the grown. My hands hide inside too long sleeves, but when I raised them they where white as bones. Turning them, flexing them I could see the blue veins under the thin skin. I had transformed into this now.
But still this place felt like a prison, but more for the mind.
I fought the nothingness, the numbness. I felt the cold inside my bones, crystallizing the last feelings I'd had as Dolores Umbril.
Despair, hopelessness, worthlessness, sadness almost acute to depression, loneliness, longing and at the end resignation.
I fought it, but it was too much, like a giant wave swallowing me up. The cold seeping to every part of my brain, commanding it, guiding it to unwanted thought, giving in was not an option as I remembered his face, the softness of his gaze the curiosity and wonder in them made would surely melt the coldness inside me.
In a thumping sound a voice rose and broad me out of my memories, I felt exasperated to be taken out of my musings, I could swore I would have almost loved him. There was a feeling there a warm inviting soft feeling giving in, rearranging everything inside me, but this interruption had made it seized and disappear almost completely. I schooled my expression, because I knew they could even read me like that, and fixed my gaze to the floor, attentive listening to the instructions, I was now to inhabit a young girls body, I was to bring him back with me this time, and by doing so, opening the gates that imprisoned us here. I could feel the cold again, the sadness, I was sorry for everything that would happen, but I needed to see him again, I needed to touch him this time, I felt a new emotion kind of like excitement mixed in with anticipation, I was aroused as I thought of the soft looking hair covering his arms and chest, his tanned skin covering young new muscles, barely peaking from his ragged clothing. Yes I felt myself excited at the possibility of touching his skin.
Heat, light, warmed, soft touches here and there, wetness between my thighs, my hand lingering softly against my eager skin. The cool breeze of the morning pebbling my nipples under the thin sheet, the softness of the bed and the linens as well as the pillow under my head. The movement is faster, my fingers dig inside me trying to find a secret place that will unleash an euphoria of need and want building it sure to a monumental release. The blush on my skin radiates warmed, making the small beads of sweat to peak out of the pores, cooling the skin and moisturizing every place. The soft ache on my throbbing bud, the friction making it tender and sensitive. It's sleekness is mesmerizing to me, the slightest of graces and my whole body reacts as if unchaining a reaction where my legs part, arms flailed above my head, back arches as if pressing my ass to the mattress, breathing becomes labored, my mouth opens and my eyes scrunch shut as if trying to hold on. Yes my self educed orgasm was interesting and pleasurable. I'd forgotten the sensations my own hand could provoke when manipulation the flesh, that same flesh that was so in tuned with my mind the movements the speed, the pressure, the way I would hold of from diving and chasing after it. The sun had changed positions and was now warming my bed fully I knew I had to get up, in the back of my mind where this person resided until it was said that I would leave, her schedule consisted of washing up, dressing –the image of a long flowing summer dress came to me, feeding a young smiling boy; walking him to a nearby school. The long walk to the dress shop would take a little more time, but the walk there was pleasant with this new weather –Images of cold winds and snow whipping at her face made me shutter. The adrenaline still coursed through my veins as I left the bed. The large mirrored closet doors held my true image as they'd done before with Dolores. It only gave the image of this new body once and then it turned slowly but surely to the real reflection within. The emaciated like thin body covered in a bone white feathery skin. As I twisted and turned I could see the protrusions on my back, the long black scars. I closed my eyes in fright, but the image already imprinted on my brain, the jagged breaths the only noise in the otherwise quiet room. I moved away keeping my gaze down. The small pink doors hide a simple washroom, entering it, my feet felt the cold of the tiles and I jumped a little from it, turning away I saw the small pink fluffy slippers.
As I washed the remains of my morning pleasure my mind kept shifting images of places, people objects, I wanted to find him as soon as possible, the feelings inside this body where too strong for me to contain, the hormones and the excitement where confusing me, I had to gain control or else the mission would fail and I'd be send back there, but this time I knew that I would never get a new chance.
Combing my hair, placing small hoop earrings, some gold bangle bracelets on my wrists and brushing some make up on my face, I kept feeling dread making my skin prick. I looked around for the long flowing summer dress in my head, and found it hanging on the back of the door. I quickly threw it on and made do of a pair of flat sandals that matched the accessories.
After fixing a light breakfast I went in search of the smiling boy-face that had been in my head moments before.
Founding him still asleep on a small room, done in various shades of blue. He looked angelic while he slept, his round cherub cheeks and soft looking skin sparked feelings of tenderness and love towards him.
I kissed his cheek and felt dread again. The skin on the back of my neck prickled and fright and disdain filled my blood.
I quickly moved away from him, leaving the room and closing the door careful not to wake him. As I turned to look back to his door, the small deep blue letters engraved on the door with the word Philip on it, his name. A warning sounded in my head and flashes of a small broken little girl being used and touched the way a any child shouldn't, I could see the small frighten dirty face, the way his large rough hands would take her clothing off, pulling it even when she protested that it chaffed her skin, or that it would the zipper would scratch her. I could see the little girl curled up inside the back seat of the car shaking and crying like a frighten little defenseless animal, and the shadow that followed her everywhere, still not aware if it's power, it could have saved her, it could have done so much, but the loud booming voices would make him repent and move away from her. He was as trapped as she was.
Ok, so I figure this is almost done, I'm really writing the next one, not kidding this time, I figure about 100 chapters, round all the corners.
Love
Mel