Notes: I'm loving the response, so thank you! Thank you for reading/reviewing and enjoy the chapter.
Chapter Sixteen
Blaine was only a little surprised when Sebastian joined them at The Lima Bean. He had expected for Kurt to leave with him, especially when he'd gotten into Sebastian's car as they all left McKinley. The two of them arrived a few minutes after he, Sam, Artie, and Mercedes did, and Blaine watched as the two of them headed to the line to order coffee. The last time all three of them had been at The Lima Bean was back in high school and back then Blaine had felt uncomfortably the rope in a game of tug of war that he wanted no part in because it was Kurt he belonged with. Now, they were standing together, talking and joking and smiling and Blaine felt like everything really had turned on its head.
"You're the worst kind of person! What kind of advice is that? Poor Elliott," Kurt was saying when he approached the table with Sebastian following him.
"Well he appreciated it," Sebastian said and rolled his eyes.
They were all looking at Kurt and Sebastian and Blaine could feel the tension. It was obvious that Kurt had kept Sebastian separate from the rest of his friends.
"You all know Sebastian," Kurt said, "all of you be nice, and that goes double for you, Seb."
Mercedes grinned. "Well I guess if the two of you are friends then he must be decent these days."
"I was always decent," Sebastian said, "if misguided."
They could all feel the awkwardness and then Sam coughed. "So, what was really up with that whole steroids thing?"
Blaine coughed. Of all the things to ask.
Sebastian looked at all of them and then he sighed. "Well," he said, "Hunter Clarington the third transferred to Dalton and after our loss with me in charge he basically took over and we all just went along with it."
"Why?" Mercedes asked.
"I did always wonder," Blaine said.
"Well, for some of us it was our last year and anyone that disagreed with him was off the Warblers. The headmaster is good friends with his father and he was quite intimidating. And I have to admit that we really wanted to win."
"But it's in the past," Kurt said, "and Blaine is bringing The Warblers back to their former glory."
Sebastian nodded quickly. "They were really good at invitationals," he said.
"You were at invitationals?" Blaine asked.
"I wanted to know how they would do," Sebastian said and left it that, but Blaine knew that there was another reason for him to have been there and it had to do with Kurt.
Conversation got easier after that, and Blaine noticed that Sebastian didn't try to speak up too often. Instead, he would mutter things to Kurt. Blaine couldn't help but watch them because he could tell that there was something building there. They were too close to just be friends.
When the conversation turned back to Rachel, Sebastian stood up, excusing himself to the bathroom.
"I just think we have to keep encouraging her," Mercedes was saying, "but she said she was going to start figuring out if she could be ready for the audition so at least there's that."
Sam had gotten thoughtful when Mercedes brought up Rachel and Blaine could tell that things were a little awkward considering how often Sam proclaimed to be in love with Mercedes, and to be waiting for her.
"You alright?" he asked.
Sam nodded, but he glanced at Mercedes.
When Sebastian returned he first stopped at the counter for a refill and then he sat down next to Kurt again and pulled out his phone.
"How's the wedding planning?" Kurt asked suddenly and for a moment Blaine flashed back to when the two of them had been planning their own wedding, but of course it wasn't the wedding that Kurt was referencing.
Artie sighed. "It's been interesting. Brittany has some good ideas I guess, but she changes her mind all the time."
It should have been expected. Blaine was looking forward to the wedding. With Brittany's eccentricities it was bound to be different and special but also sweet and beautiful and all the things that a wedding needed to be. He tried not to let his mind stray towards what could have been. Instead he listened to Artie explain what Brittany had asked of him already.
"And I guess there's also something going on with Santana's abuela," he finished.
Sebastian who had still been looking at his phone suddenly handed it to Kurt, who didn't even blink as he grabbed it and grinned before he typed something quickly.
The sun was going down by the time that they all picked up their belongings and left The Lima Bean and once Blaine got into his car, he loitered there. He waved at Sam who was driving Artie and Mercedes home and then started his car, but waited.
Sebastian and Kurt had each bought two more cups of coffee and as they left The Lima Bean, Sebastian had thrown his arm around Kurt's shoulders and Kurt was laughing. He batted Sebastian's arm away, but Blaine could tell that he wasn't doing it because he minded Sebastian's touch. It was painful to watch. Kurt was so carefree and easy going with Sebastian. Their friendship was so clear, there, but Blaine couldn't help but also see that it could very easily turn into something else entirely. It made him wonder if Kurt was even thinking about their kiss anymore like Blaine was.
It was a constant thought, dropping in whether Blaine wanted it to or not. Being around Kurt had made him lose his trail of thought numerous times already, and it was something that he was more than ready to stop. He had a boyfriend after all and he was happy with him. It had just been a really good kiss. That was all.
Kurt dropped onto the sofa next to his dad.
"Long day?"
Kurt sighed. "Rachel went to New York for an audition."
His dad didn't say anything and Kurt was glad, because it wasn't that he was searching for anyone to tell him that he would make it too. He didn't need assurance or pretty words to bring up his confidence. It was just that he needed to be frustrated about it.
"So a few days without Rachel, you get that choir room to yourself. You should be cheering."
Kurt imagined that he probably would have been if Mercedes hadn't just taken over. Kurt had asked her about it, and Mercedes had been reluctant in telling him that Rachel had asked her to stick around and help him.
It wasn't that he didn't understand why Rachel needed the push or the help, because Rachel was his friend and he could see how devastated she had been even months after the whole tanking of her tv-show. The way that she grasped at the glee club was also a bit too much like Mr. Shuester for Kurt's liking, but he figured it was just temporary for her. She would pick herself up and get back to it after a time. Kurt hadn't been willing to push her, though, and he knew that he should have acted like Mercedes but a part of Kurt had reveled in the fact that Rachel Berry, self proclaimed star had made all the wrong choices and that instead it was he who still attended NYADA and who had the bright unblemished future ahead of him.
The thing was, and Kurt felt a little bit foolish for even thinking it, that none of his friends had ever tried to pick him up and push him to realize his potential. Maybe he just didn't need it, but a part of him just wished that back when he'd felt like everything was lost that all of them had banned together to send him on his way back to finding his dream and living the life he was meant to live. Of course, there had always been Blaine, who encouraged him to go to New York even though he had no job, or a school to attend, or even a place to live. Blaine had always been the best friend that Kurt ever had.
"Mercedes took her place," he told his dad.
Burt glanced at him. "She's your friend isn't she?"
Things were easier with Mercedes. She was a lot more easy going, and she had great ideas that didn't clash with Kurt's like Rachel's often did.
"I guess, maybe I'm just missing New York."
"That or you want to have your chance at being on stage again," Burt said.
There was also that. Kurt had gone to auditions, of course he had, but never for anything that would get in the way of his education. He had participated in plenty of NYADA student productions and he couldn't deny that he'd had fun with them.
"You will one day, kid," Burt said, "but you've said it, you want to graduate first."
Kurt nodded. "I'm just being silly."
He stood up, kissed his dad on the forehead, and walked up the stairs to his room wondering if a nap might do him some good. He didn't get to decide, before his phone was ringing.
"Dani," he said, "haven't heard from you in a while."
Dani laughed. "I'm sorry," she said, "it's just Sarah keeps me occupied and you know I've been trying to play at least once a week when I get time."
"Yeah. I've heard all about it from Elliott. How is he, by the way, Sebastian tried to fill me in on the stuff about the chick he took home because he thought it was a guy crossdressing."
Dani laughed again. "Oh my god, Kurt, you cannot begin to imagine the phone call I got the morning of. I felt so bad. I don't think he's tried to pick anyone up since, poor thing."
"So, what's going on aside from that?" Kurt asked, "and if you're just calling to check that I haven't gone on dates with fifty year olds, you can be assured that I haven't."
Kurt sat down on the edge of the bed.
"Actually, Elliott told me you and Sebastian kissed and I wanted to check that you were alright. You didn't sleep with him right?"
Kurt groaned and he stood up in one fluid motion. No one was supposed to know about the kiss. It was supposed to be something between him and Sebastian, but of course Sebastian had gone and told Elliott not that it made sense that he would. Kurt sighed. He had thought they were over it, that they wouldn't be discussing it again.
"No I didn't sleep with him," he said, "who do you think I am?"
"Should have known better," Dani said, "but you can't deny that he's hot. If I weren't a lesbian and he weren't gay…"
Kurt laughed. He'd heard that before, but he didn't want to tell Dani that it had come from Santana.
"Well, it meant nothing alright. It was just a stupid kiss and Sebastian and I decided that we could just forget about it and I don't understand why he would even tell Elliott."
"Alright," Dani said and then after a moment, "though it wouldn't be the worst thing for you to be interested in Sebastian like that."
"We are done having this conversation," Kurt said and he walked back to his bed.
The next day, Kurt was surprised to see Blaine at McKinley. They ran into each other in the parking lot.
"What are you doing here?" Kurt asked, "if I didn't know better, I'd think you were spying."
Blaine scoffed. "Oh, come on. We know who the spy is among us."
Kurt rolled his eyes. "We established I didn't really go there to spy, though," Kurt said, "remember."
He didn't need to say it out loud, and Kurt didn't know if he should considering that Karofksy which had been his issue then, was his issue again for completely different reasons.
They walked in silence to the school and were met by Sam and Mercedes.
"As it's turned out, the theme this week is to help friends," Mercedes said once they were all in the choir room with the new glee kids and everything, "and Santana and Brittany need help singing to Santana's abuela."
Kurt was only a little surprised that the idea hadn't been run through him first, but Mercedes at least looked apologetic and Kurt couldn't help but feel that for all the practice they were giving the glee kids on singing as a unit, that they were failing them when it came to giving them real lessons for them and for their growth as people and artists.
Still, he went along with the idea.
It was all a bit strange, and after they had done their part of backing Santana up, they all left them to it and Kurt let the glee kids go, telling them they didn't need to worry about afterschool practice.
"I want to get drunk," Kurt said when he got into Sebastian's car.
"What?" Sebastian asked.
Kurt leaned back in the passenger seat, but he turned his face to look at Sebastian and he groaned.
"It was just a long day," Kurt said, "and for once Blaine wasn't a part of it although I guess Mercedes already wants all of us to sing for Brittany and Santana tomorrow. I am so sick of singing to my friends."
Sebastian couldn't help but laugh.
"And," Kurt continued, "we didn't do it today because Rachel won't be back until tomorrow and of course we have to wait for Rachel."
Sebastian waited for Kurt to continue, but when he didn't, he pulled out of the parking space. "If you do want to get drunk, I'm all for it. And on the plus side, even though she wouldn't have bothered us, my mom went back to New York."
Kurt hummed and then he nodded. "Yes, let's get drunk and forget about everything."
Sebastian had noticed that Kurt was having a bit of a hard week, but he'd assumed that most of it had to do with the presence of Blaine at McKinley although that wouldn't have been his first guess. He would have thought that Kurt would be happy to have Blaine around.
So, later that night after they stopped to pick up a pizza and of course the booze, they were sitting in the den.
"This is nice," Kurt said, "I haven't done this in a while."
Sebastian for his part had never been the kind to stay at home and drink. Then again, that was probably because he enjoyed going out and hooking up while just on the side of buzzed.
"Rachel and I used to do it all the time," he said, "wine and pizza and gossip."
"That sounds like the two of you," Sebastian said.
Kurt who had sprawled himself out on the floor in front of the coffee table reached for his glass of wine and took a gulp.
"She's in New York. I told you, she went, and I guess her audition went well. She called me earlier."
"Oh," Sebastian said.
Kurt nodded and Sebastian was starting to think that this was the real reason that Kurt wanted to get drunk and not the Blaine of it all, but it was probably a factor too.
"I just," Kurt said, "I know I'll make it. I know. And I value the education I'm getting; the experience and the knowledge and all the things that I'm learning, the people I'm meeting, all of it. But I'm me. I'm this high voice, and this face, and I'm just not fit for a variety of roles. I just know that even if I kill it at every audition that there will always be someone that is manlier, someone that will appeal to a broader audience. Rachel won't ever have that problem."
Sebastian watched him as he downed his glass and reached for the bottle for a refill. They had bought more than just wine, but it was their starting point at least for while they ate.
"So you're getting down on yourself because of Rachel Berry," Sebastian said, "didn't she break her contract with a Broadway show? That's going to follow her for a while yet. I don't think any audition will make anyone forget about that or her flop of a show."
Kurt nodded. "It doesn't change that it's going to be harder for me."
Sebastian sighed. "You know, I'm still pretty impressed by that band of yours. You have a lot to fall back on if the whole Broadway thing doesn't work out."
He watched Kurt, and took a bite of his pizza. It was strange to see Kurt unsure of himself. Sebastian had been privy to Kurt's heartbreak over Blaine and he'd seen him upset and angry, and he'd even seen him in tears but even through all of that time, not once had Kurt insinuated that he thought he wasn't good enough.
"Sorry," Kurt said, "I'm being a bit morose. Things are just so uncertain, you know."
"Stop it, Kurt, you're going to be a star. I know it. You know it. Hell, even Rachel Berry knows it."
Kurt smiled a little and he nodded.
"Even if it's a porn star," Sebastian added because he couldn't help himself, "and I would be more than willing to be your co-star in that endeavor."
Kurt threw a crumpled napkin at him and laughed while he shook his head. The finished eating in silence and then Kurt got up and stretched.
"I still want to get drunk," he announced.
"I'm not stopping you, Princess, but I think it's just a little sad that we're sitting here just drinking."
Kurt glanced at him over his shoulder where he was crouched in front of the bag with everything they'd bought.
"You just want to watch more Doctor Who," he said.
Sebastian laughed, and while he hadn't intended that at all, he shrugged his shoulders. "Sure."
"Well put it on," Kurt said, "I'll enjoy it drunk or not."
An hour or so later, they were both sitting on the couch, the episode of Doctor Who forgotten because Kurt, as it turned out, was a talkative drunk and he was telling Sebastian all about the first time he got drunk.
"I don't know what I was thinking," Kurt said and threw his head back against the couch, "and it made me so sick. I threw up all over poor Ms. Pillsbury's shoes."
Sebastian laughed. He could picture it all. A younger Kurt with no idea what he was doing, hung over in school and throwing up on his guidance councilor of all people.
"She has OCD," Kurt added, "to make things worse."
Kurt kept drinking, and giggling, and talking and Sebastian felt like he was getting to know Kurt even better than he had ever expected to.
"I like you," Kurt said eventually and he stared right at Sebastian, "a lot. I like you, a lot."
He was slurring a little bit, and his cheeks were pink, and Sebastian thought that he was beautiful.
"Not supposed to," Kurt said, and he turned on the couch so he was on his knees, facing Sebastian.
"I think you've had enough," Sebastian said.
"Probably," Kurt said and he tilted his head to the side, and Sebastian could feel his eyes on him.
Kurt inched closer. "I keep thinking about it," he whispered.
"Thinking about what?" Sebastian asked.
Kurt shook his head and he smiled a little. "The kiss," he admitted after a moment.
"The one in the elevator," Sebastian said and he felt like his heart was thudding in his chest. His gut twisted.
"Nuh uh," Kurt said and he leaned forward.
It would have been easy to stop him, to push him back, but Sebastian found that he didn't want to. So when Kurt kissed him, falling into him because he had no balance, Sebastian only wrapped his arms around him and he fell back against the armrest.
Kurt kissed him sloppily and off center, his lips landing closer to the right side of Sebastian's mouth and he giggled when he pulled back, but instead of getting off Sebastian he went for it again and Sebastian lifted a hand to Kurt's neck, meeting him and sweeping his lips against Kurt's.
He tasted mostly of the margarita he'd drunk last, but Sebastian didn't mind one bit because kissing Kurt again was amazing and from the little noises that Kurt was making, he knew that Kurt would agree with him.
Author's Note: Alright, so as most of you know I've been debating endgame basically since the first chapter. I am currently writing chapter 24 and it is leaning in a certain direction, more so than I really noticed. However, I also very easily see the point where that could shift into a different direction.
So it's much of the same. However, and a few people have heard this from me I've also been considering the idea of an alternative ending to whatever ends up happening which I won't know until I write it. I do not write with any kind of outline or plan in mind aside from notes on the episodes and even those are literally sequence of events...so, what I'm saying here because I know everyone wants to know the endgame is that at the moment I am committed to the idea of writing both endings.
The one thing I want to do before I write the ending is watch how Glee ends. And that may impact that a little bit probably not a whole lot.
On another note, I will not be covering the entire season with this fic mostly because I don't want to drag it out more than it already will be. So, that's that...