All the way to work I think about Ana's mood this morning. We've only been trying for a little over a week; it's unrealistic to expect results so soon. If she starts obsessing about this it will only make matters worse. Maybe I should insist that she accompany me to my session with Flynn today. That might backfire, though, since whenever I try to coerce her into something she doesn't want to do she usually digs in her heels and becomes more obstinate. The funny thing is that I'm surprised at how disappointed I felt when I saw that box of tampons.
My worries prove baseless, however, when I get a call from her midmorning. She's crying and apologetic and I do my best to soothe her, trying to convince her that she's not infertile and that she's not a failure as a woman or as a wife. I'm pleasantly surprised when, without my bringing it up, she asks me if she can go with me to see Flynn. I suggest lunch at the club first and she agrees to meet me there.
When she comes into the private room Andrea booked I can tell she's still upset. Except for a brief time before and after Teddy was born, Ana's never been very hormonal. No matter where she is in her cycle, her moods have always been pretty much on an even keel. I can only chalk up this change to distress at not being pregnant.
"Hey, baby, how are you doing?" As she comes to the table, I stand up and give her a hug and a kiss.
"I'll be okay," she answers, as I pull out her chair and she sits. "I just can't believe how depressed I got when my period showed up this morning. It was like my world fell apart."
We're interrupted by the waiter. "Mind if I order for us?" I ask her and she waves her hand to give me the go-ahead. I tell him we'll both have the salmon en croute with duchess potatoes and the salad niçoise. I'd ordered San Pellegrino when I got here and he pours our glasses for us before disappearing with our order.
I look at her and take a deep breath. I'm treading lightly here since the last thing I want to do is trivialize her feelings. "I'm disappointed, too, but really, it's way too early to expect results. We've only been trying for about a week!"
"I know, it's just that I got pregnant so easily with Teddy, I thought for sure it would happen right away."
"It'll happen, baby, just relax. So you still want to go with me to see Flynn?" I ask her.
"I do," she replies. "I think you're still a little too skeptical about what's going on. I'd also like to hear firsthand what his views are on this sort of thing."
"He was rather noncommittal last week but we were working from the premise that these are hallucinations. I doubt that he watches Ghost Hunters or the Long Island Medium but I think he'll probably have an open mind."
"Well, a lot more has happened since last week so I'm hoping he has a very open mind."
"Just so you know, I did tell him we're trying for another baby." She looks surprised and I hasten to reassure her. "I think he was a little shocked but he seemed genuinely happy about it."
"You didn't tell me that last week when you described your session with him." She sounds a little miffed.
"It slipped my mind. You were rather upset when I told you I'd seen him and you and I went off on a tangent. Really, I totally forgot about it." It's hard to tell but I think she's mollified. I change the topic and we talk about work and our schedules for the week.
Our meals arrive and we discuss our session with Flynn. I want to make sure we remember everything that's happened since I saw him last week. Ana thinks it's important to mention Taylor's conversations with the previous owners and the fact that nothing happened to me when we were at Escala over the weekend. I've also brought the notepad with my handwritten account of what happened yesterday morning.
There's plenty of time after we finish our lunch so instead of heading back to our respective offices we decide to take a leisurely walk to Flynn's office. It's a beautiful day and it feels so good to be strolling along, holding hands with my beautiful wife. It's so fucking normal, too; she's alive, I'm alive, no ghosts or hallucinations or apparitions. I only wish Teddy could be here with us.
Flynn was prompt, as usual, and Ana and I have taken our time recounting our experiences, all the way up to her reaction this morning to getting her period. He's interrupted us from time to time, for clarification or to make comments. Once we finished, his first response was to Ana, reassuring her that conception doesn't always happen quickly and can take up to several months. I think she's feeling more relaxed about it but I won't know for sure until later, when we're by ourselves.
We then discuss the whole paranormal aspect of these events. Much to Ana's relief, Flynn is completely open to the possibility that this could indeed be a visitor from beyond the grave.
"Freud and Jung," he says, "both investigated the paranormal. And I've heard too many things from my patients to completely disregard the idea that these things happen. But what I'd like to focus on right now is your reaction, Christian. In spite of your belief that these apparitions are mainly from your imagination, you seemed to respond quite strongly. Why do you think that is?"
Oh, boy, here we go with the psych-speak. Ana pipes up, "Christian, if you like, I can wait outside or go back to the office so you can discuss this with John by yourself."
"No, stay here, please. I'm not going to say anything I don't want you to hear." I turn to John. "Whether this is real or my imagination, I guess I'm pissed that she shows up now. Things are going well for us; I don't need this shitty drama in our lives. She said she's trying to make amends. If she'd been any decent kind of mother to me twenty-six or -seven years ago, she wouldn't need to make amends now. Maybe it's having a son of my own, seeing him so innocent and helpless, that makes me angry that someone who was supposed to protect me subjected me to the horrors she did."
"Fatherhood can change a man that way," John remarks. "According to my notes, she mentioned that 'he's alive.' Do you have any idea what she's talking about?"
"No clue. Could be her pimp, could be my birth father, Elena's ex-husband, could be anyone."
"Hmm, of course I haven't heard her the way you have but it seems like she's giving you some kind of warning. Have you felt like you're in any kind of danger lately?"
I shake my head while thinking about my answer. After a moment I tell him, "No, not any more than usual. I've been a target ever since my wealth reached a certain point, which is why I have my security team. But as far as I know, there are no imminent threats to any of us. I'll make a note to ask Taylor but I haven't seen or felt anything out of the ordinary."
"Okay, then. It seems that these events are growing more vivid. I'm glad you took notes. If you don't mind, I'd like a copy of them for your file."
"No, not at all," I say as I hand him my notepad. He takes it and calls his receptionist to make copies. While she's doing that he starts wrapping up the session. "I think that whether these phenomena are a function of your mental state or are really paranormal events, you should proceed as you've been doing. Keep journaling and keep on engaging with whatever this is. On the chance that this really is your birth mother, you may find answers to questions you didn't even know you had. Keep an open mind, Christian, just like your wife." He gives her a wink and she smiles back at him.
"It's easy for her to say," I state, looking back at him, "She's not the one going through this." Turning to her, I ask, "How would you feel if your birth father showed up in the middle of the night wanting to talk to you?"
Her smile is gone in an instant. "I'd give almost anything to talk to my birth father," she whispers, "If this really is Ella, I think you're very fortunate, Christian." I can see her eyes start to well up and I'm about to reach over to hug her when the receptionist knocks on the door. She's got Flynn's copies of my notes. He takes them from her and hands me back my notepad.
"Unless I hear from you before then, we'll meet again next week," he says as Ana and I stand up. We shake hands and leave. Downstairs, Taylor's waiting and after some discussion, we have him take us both home. On the way there, I ask her how she's feeling about not being pregnant. She reassures me that she's okay and to prove it, she crawls on my lap and we make out like teenagers until we're in the driveway of the house.
Once inside, we check on Teddy and tell Gail when to have dinner ready. Since we've been away from work all afternoon, we decide to check in, so she heads to her office and I to mine. There aren't any major crises for me but plenty of issues to manage and direct people on. There's an upcoming deal that may mean a lengthy trip to South Africa for me. I don't really want to go but if I do, I'll find a way to bring Anastasia there for at least some of the time.
Dinner is a beautifully serene affair on the terrace. The weather's perfect and Teddy's babbling happily in his high chair while Ana and I take turns feeding him. When we're finished with our meals, we leave the dishes for Gail and head for the trail down on the coast. It's a lovely evening, much like when I walked here last week. Ana and I walk hand in hand while Teddy bumps along in his carrier on my chest. I purposely avoid looking at the cliff on the way back, not wanting any specters from the past to ruin these precious moments.
When we get back to the house we put Teddy to bed and then head to our room to get ready for bed ourselves. I'm in my shorts, standing at the sink in our bathroom, brushing my teeth, when naked Ana comes up behind me, puts her arms around me, and starts gently stroking my chest. Hmmm, what's this about?
"Christian?" she murmurs softly.
"Yeah, baby?" I reply with a mouth full of toothpaste and bubbles.
"Remember that night in the hotel in Savannah?" Is she thinking what I think she's thinking? Just in case she is, Mr. Happy starts getting ready to make an appearance. I finish brushing, then turn around to face her, wrapping my arms around her and cupping her buns.
"I'll never forget it. Why do you ask?"
"Oh, I was just thinking about it…" she answers coyly, running her fingers through my chest hair and looking up at me with beautiful blue eyes. There's a hint of a smile on her face and Mr. Happy is now standing at full attention.
"I see. Well, Mrs. Grey, history has a way of repeating itself." I walk around behind her and take her little hands in mine. "I remember how uncomfortable you were with your nakedness." I place her hands on her tummy; she's watching them with a sultry look in her eyes. "I love the fact that you're so comfortable with it now." I start moving her hands, the left one down to her little mound of hair, the right one up to her left tit, squeezing the nipple just a little. A slight moan escapes her lips. I nuzzle her neck, just below her right ear, flicking my tongue lightly against her skin. I slowly move her hands so their positions are switched and move my head so I'm nuzzling her neck on the left side. Mr. Happy is trying to work his way out of his cotton prison, stimulated by his contact with Ana's luscious derriere.
After a couple minutes of stroking and watching ourselves in the mirror, I take her hands and place them on the edge of the counter. "You know what to do, baby," I tell her and she grips the edge firmly. I take her hips and pull them back until she's bent over. Stepping out of my shorts, I spread her legs far apart. Just like that night in Georgia, I reach between her folds, find the tampon string, and gently tug it out, then throw it in the toilet.
Positioning myself just right, I gradually guide my cock inside her. Oh sweet lord, she feels so good! I start with slow deliberate strokes and reach down so I can gently caress her clit. Her moaning intensifies and I pick up my pace. I ever so subtly increase the pressure on her with my hand and I start to feel the quivering in her hips that I'm so familiar with, that I love. She starts breathing in little gasps and I know it's close, both for her and me.
Finally, I feel her pussy grab my cock as she shudders and shouts, "Christian!" and I follow her down that sweet tumultuous path, spilling myself into her. We last through a couple more thrusts, then collapse on the floor as one, my dick pulling out of her, spilling semen and blood and moisture down our legs and onto the tiles. I lean back against the closest thing, which happens to be the bidet, and we wrap our arms around each other.
"Hard to believe that was over two years ago," she whispers.
"I was just going to say the same thing," I whisper back, chuckling. "Would you like to take a bath together like last time?"
"A bath would take too long to run, how about a shower instead?" she replies as she looks up at me.
"A shower it is, then." We struggle to our feet and walk over to the stall.
The shower was quick and we're in bed, spooning. It's been an emotionally exhausting day and I have the uneasy feeling that there will be many more just as exhausting in the near future. But as long as I have Anastasia and Teddy, we'll get through them.
"Christian?" she murmurs sleepily.
"Yeah, baby?"
"I love you."
"I love you, too, Anastasia."