Shepard's head throbbed. It was the kind of ache that pulsed through the rest of his body. His fingertips curled into his palm as he stirred from unconsciousness. Visions of destruction still swam through his head, intertwined with the usual echoes of his past. A heavy sigh escaped his lips as he opened his eyes, fighting the intensity of the bright light.
"Doctor! Doctor Chakwas? I think he's waking up." A woman's voice called out, a little more loudly than he appreciated. Shit, I feel like I've been slamming back tequila. What the hell happened?
He pushed his memory, fighting the visions still flashing in his mind, until he recalled Eden Prime. The beacon, the geth. Finding Chief Williams. The colonists, dead. Mutated. Nihlus, dead. Jenkins, dead. His eyes shut once more as he took a deep breath and he rested his forehead in his palms. Lose one of your squad and an entire colony. Let the Spectre run off and get himself killed. Great fucking job, Shepard. He looked up, but still refused to turn towards the voices speaking behind him. Another ache, and a flash of fire. And now, you're seeing things. Goddamn fantastic. This is why I don't do colony runs.
"You gave us quite a scare there, Commander. How are you feeling?" The doctor walked around his bed to stand before him, a concerned expression on her face.
"Great." Shepard's voice was short, intending to cut off any further questions about his wellbeing. Chakwas looked far from deterred. "How long was I out? What happened to the beacon?"
"About fifteen hours, something happened down there – "
"It was my fault. I must have triggered something getting close to it, you had to pull me out of the way," Williams spoke up quickly, cutting the doctor off. Shepard glanced over his shoulder at her, raising an eyebrow.
"You had no way of knowing," The commander put simply, confused by her reaction to the events. Much to his surprise she seemed to relax at his words. Huh.
"But what about the beacon? Were we able to retrieve it?" He repeated urgently, looking back to Chakwas. He needed to know the mission wasn't a complete failure.
The doctor frowned and shook her head. "Unfortunately, no. The beacon exploded, and the resulting blast was what knocked you unconscious."
"Some kind of system overload, we think. The lieutenant and I carried you back to the ship," Williams put in, coming around the table to stand beside Chakwas.
"Appreciate it." He nodded towards the soldier in thanks, earning a smile from the woman. Someone's proud of themselves. He managed to quirk his lips in a half smile, before another throb pulsed through his brain. The next few minutes passed with him nodding as he listened to Chakwas drone about abnormal brainwaves and rapid eye movement. He offered short replies, affirming her suspicions that he had dreamt but not elaborating. He wasn't about to let the ships only doctor believe he was a psych case.
"How's our XO holding up, doctor?" A deep, familiar voice cut into his thoughts. Shepard glanced around at Anderson as he entered the med lab, nodding and pushing to stand up.
"I'm fine, sir." The captain looked right past him, however, clearly not taking his word for it.
"Doctor?"
"All readings are normal. I'd say our commander is fit for duty." Chakwas smiled at Shepard and made to leave the room. Williams cast a last quick glance at the commander before snapping a salute and following her out. Shepard wasted no time.
"What the hell happened down there? Geth? We weren't prepared, sir. Intel dropped the ball." He grimaced, become increasingly irritated at Anderson's calm exterior. Why wasn't he upset? The mission was a spectacular failure, and the man before him remained impassive as Shepard let loose on him.
"We lost the beacon. Oh, and the Spectre meant to evaluate me was killed. By another Spectre. I mean, what the hell?" He growled out, watching as the captain quirked a brow. "Sir." He added as an afterthought, and Anderson shook his head.
"What's this about, Shepard? You didn't seem too thrilled about even being considered as a candidate when we talked with Nihlus," Anderson asked, leaning back against the nearest bed. "Missions don't always go as planned, you know that. We knew going in this wasn't a simple in-and-out."
"I lost Jenkins." Shepard growled, looking away. "I lost the colony."
"You know that wasn't your fault. You did your job, and you did it well, Shepard." Anderson shook his head, pausing a beat to examine his XO. "Now come off it, and tell me what happened with the beacon. We need something to bring before the Council about Nihlus and the geth invasion. Lieutenant Alenko submitted a report while you were out. Now, Saren is a Spectre as well, and if everything is how it looks, then he's gone rogue and allied himself with the geth. He was one of the Council's best agents and he's about as anti-human as they come. If he's who we're up against, we're going to have a hell of a time convincing them he's guilty." Anderson sighed, pacing back and forth in front of the commander.
Shepard rubbed a hand over his face, fingers scratching at the lengthening stubble. "Saren was there for the beacon. The geth wouldn't have been trying to move it otherwise."
"Right. Did anything happen when you triggered it? Anything that might give us a clue as to why Saren wanted it?"
"Maybe. When I approached it, I… had a vision." Shepard glanced up to Anderson's eyes, searching for clues that he might be sent to a ward somewhere. Shit, he's going to think I'm insane.
"A vision? Of what?" Anderson stopped his pacing, offering the commander his full attention.
"Destruction. War. It was fuzzy, in pieces. There was screaming, synthetics slaughtering people. I couldn't tell if it was geth." Shepard closed his eyes at the resurgence of pain in his head.
"We have to report this to the Council." Anderson said quickly, apparently unfazed by Shepard's vision of the apocalypse.
"What? We can't bring them a bad dream as evidence. They'll think I'm insane!"
"We can't even begin to know how much information was stored in that beacon. It was Prothean, thousands of years old. Any piece that may have transferred itself to you is something Saren now has as well, and something we need to bring him in." Anderson's voice became heated, determined. "We need to stop him, Shepard. Whatever secrets he wanted from that beacon, I guarantee you he'll use them against humanity. With that and his newfound army of geth, we need every shred of evidence available to us to bring to the Council. With them on our side, we might have a chance at it."
Shepard nodded. "Understood, sir. We'll bring him down."
"Good. We should be getting close to the Citadel. Head upstairs and tell Joker to bring us in to dock." Anderson ordered, and started towards the door before adding, "Williams will be joining the ground team. She's a good soldier, so try not to be too much of an ass." The captain smirked, and left a frowning Shepard alone in the medbay.
Fan-fucking-tastic.
Shepard rolled his neck, considering his treatment of the new member of his squad. He knew he had been a bit short with her on Eden Prime, but getting your ass shot at and losing a squad mate generally did that to him. Added to her and Alenko's chatter mid-combat, he was rather proud he'd only told the two to shut up and shoot once. His insensitive reaction to the loss of her squad wasn't lost on him, however. He sighed, brushing his hair back with his fingers. He might have to apologize for that one.
The commander stepped out of the medbay, set on heading to the cockpit to talk to Joker, but stopped as he heard Williams approach from behind.
"Commander Shepard, have a minute?"
Shepard nodded, turning towards her. "Sure, Williams."
"I just wanted to apologize again. Getting my commander injured is generally not how I like to start off a new assignment. It won't happen again, sir." Williams said seriously, but there was an undertone of humor that surprised Shepard. "I'm glad you're okay. The crew needs some good news after what happened to Jenkins." She continued, humor vanishing from her voice.
She's obviously already settled in. She didn't even know the kid.
"Jenkins was a good soldier. He'll be missed." He ground out, shifting his weight from one foot to the other. "And don't worry about it. Like I said, you couldn't have known what would happen. I needed a nap anyways."
Williams smiled. "Right. Thanks, Commander." She stopped, seemingly conflicted on whether or not to continue. "Can I ask you something, sir? I know you said down there that dying is just part of the job, but you can't really believe that, can you? I lost my entire squad down there. Hell, you lost your whole unit on Akuze. I know God wouldn't just let that happen unless he had a plan."
Shepard tensed instantly."God had nothing to do with this. You're a marine, Williams. People die. Praying isn't going to stop that." He barked, but cut himself short as the woman seemed to regret her words. He inhaled deeply, trying to extinguish his temper. You're supposed to not be an ass, asshole. Shepard glanced at Williams, taking in her now frigid expression. Shit. "I'm sorry about your squad. Welcome aboard." He muttered quickly, then stalked off towards the stairs. Behind him, he overheard hushed voices.
"Is he always that much of a dick?"
"I don't know. He usually just doesn't talk."