A/N Dear anons, I doubt you have read the story this far, but I am a bit obsessed with answering the comments so here it goes:
1. Dear Guest, I do not see the need to change the story tags - I have Rumbelle as a pairing and Charming & Regina as characters. They do pop up in the story so I think it's fair.
2. Dear RumbelleFan, I'm pleased beyond measure you've heard about this fic but if someone has any grief as to how it ends, they could discuss it with me instead of talking "behind my back". I wish you'd leave anon comments on AO3 or smth so I could reply normally.
Nevertheless, I didn't alter the fic's ending. Funny that you've heard about the original story but not the sequel, which is currently a WIP and will also be posted here.
Angst is coming but there is a tag for that. Who doesn't love angst anyways?
Sorry about that detour, now back to the story.
It felt uneasy. She was still angry at him in the tower, mostly because of the way he spoke, and it hardly looked like they made up.
Yet Belle did smile at him when she found Rumpelstiltskin in the living room at his wheel and offered to share tea with her. Her feeling were ambiguous – she wanted to get away from him to have time to think yet she knew yearned to accept him; frankly, she understood them man if she imagined herself in his shoes. But still…
He cautiously moved to sit near, positioning himself right on the floor next to her, stretching one leg out while his arm rested on the bent knee of his other leg. Despite a seemingly relaxed and casual pose, his shoulders were stiff as if he expected her to move away but the girl made no sign his presence at her side was undesired.
"When you said you made arrangements, what did you mean?"
"Belle…" he scowled.
"I have the right to know. If you're going to inflict pain on someone because of me, I need to know."
"I'm not doing it because of you," he grimaced. "I used it merely an excuse to get to Regina."
"Still, it's my fault."
"Don't be ridiculous."
"It is. So tell me. What did you do?"
He was quiet but she knew she won. Rumpelstiltskin sighed.
"I detached my shadow."
"What? How?" Belle's eyes turned round. She didn't even imagine something like that was possible.
"With a dagger, of course," the man replied plainly as if cutting one's shadow off was with a knife was a most obvious and mundane thing. She squinted her eyes and indeed, in the soft light caused by the fireplace she could not see him cast a shadow.
"But why?"
"I sent it away to do… things."
"What kind of things?" she persisted.
"Nasty things. Belle, trust me when I say you don't want to know."
She did but she also feared his answer.
"Will those things prove.… fatal to Regina?" She asked carefully and he waved his hand it the air dismissively, indicating it was nothing worthy of her trouble.
"No, I don't believe they will."
Belle let out a sigh of relief and shifted to tuck her feet under herself.
"But, dearie, there're far worse things out there than death," he added dryly, making the girl wince.
They sat in silence for several minutes, Belle trying to process what she heard. What was worse than death? Torture, solitude, madness, or being shunned from every place and despised by everyone? Her mind lacked the ability to encompass what his devious imagination could conjure.
"Rumpelstiltskin, is there any way you could reverse it? Call the shadow back?"
"No." There was no regret in his voice but he sounded genuine, locking their eyes, his large irises holding the dancing bronze sparks from the mantle.
"But if you could… now that... That I've repeated more than once how important it is to me, would you do it?"
"How does it matter now?" he sounded irritated but didn't raise his voice. "It's done."
"It matters to me. Please answer."
His eyes searched her face. Her features were relaxed but her glare seemed hard and determined; it was important to her.
"Maybe," he admitted reluctantly, concerned about appearing too soft. Hell, had he not given into his anger - curse Regina for being able to provoke him even when she was miles away - he could have played along with this whim of Belle's. Not that he believed in, how Belle put it, the idea of her being held responsible if he kept his promise to the Queen to destroy her; but the way Belle spoke of them, well, a couple as if she wanted them to be together, was enough to convince him to do anything for her.
"Thank you," she said quietly and he closed his eyes. She had nothing to thank him for, nothing would change. Yet a mere promise that it might have been different restored her faith in him. "That's all I wanted to know."
Her hand faintly brushed his cheek and he leaned into the touch. It was wrong, completely wrong. He didn't deserve this, her kindness, her acceptance, but oh but how he craved it.
"Belle," his voice no more than a croak, ugly and flawed just like he was. Rumpelstiltskin shut his eyes tighter. "Why do you do this? Why do you reach for me time and again, even if I never fail to prove that I am a monster?"
Her hand petted his hair, slow gentle strokes of her fingers soothing yet he tensed and held his breath waiting for her answer.
"Because you're no monster, and if you won't believe it yourself, I can believe it for both of us." Rumpelstiltskin swallowed hard. Us. There was an us now and his stomach fluttered at it. Us.
"I see the goodness in you and there is a reason for everything you do. I don't think it's the first time Regina tried to get to you; only this time she used me to hurt you. You were afraid for my safety and you wanted to strike first now to never encounter that kind of situation again." It hit very close to home but that was to be expected. Belle was smart, but she didn't seem to realize just how much he was affected by her abduction. "I understand why you did it, even if I do not like it."
Rumpelstiltskin sniggered.
"You make it sound so simple, so.… human. Relatable, even. You read too many books, darling, not every deed has noble motives behind it and not every villain can be justified."
She smiled; the realization that they were done with his scornful dearie took the sting from his words. Did he even notice that he referred to her differently?
"Perhaps you don't read enough books," she teased and he sincerely laughed that time.
"Do you want to educate your monster then?"
"I'll read to you later. Can we stay like that for now? It's nice."
Rumpelstiltskin opened his arms and she edged closer, sliding down onto the floor and pressing her face in the crook of his neck as his arms wrapped around her form tightly. Neither of them spoke for a while. Only when Belle's body became limp in his embrace did he realize that this quietness was due to the fact that the girl had dozed off. Rumpelstiltskin chuckled, amused by how much at ease she could feel with him; most people were afraid to even approach him, much less to turn their backs to him, yet Belle wasn't a bit troubled by the fact she felt asleep with her head on the shoulder of this most powerful and loathed sorcerer. Then again, the notion of "most people" hardly ever applied to the girl.
He nudged her softly, smiling at a muffled hmmph she made.
"I'm terribly wounded, sweetheart. I've never imagined my company bored you to sleep," he made a mocking pout when Belle sat straight and looked at him groggily.
"Are you complaining that only a few women actually slept in your arms, preferring other activities?" She frowned and Rumpelstiltskin shook his head. How did she manage to turn his joke into a potentially disastrous discussion of his previous experiences? And there he was, thinking he possessed the rare gift of twisting one's words.
"No woman had ever found my embrace comfortable enough for sleeping. Or ever wanted to," he shrugged, hoping that'd be enough to satisfy her curiosity.
"Oh," she chewed on her lips before forming another question. "So what was it like with them?"
"Like satisfying the itch." Belle wrinkled her nose at that. "Quick, impersonal and unburdening. Fair trade, we just exchanged... favours."
"How many have there been?"
"How many what have there been?"
"Women!" she snapped and Rumpelstiltskin was taken aback by how forcefully she said it.
"Jeeealous, are you?" he teased in a honeyed voice, usually reserved to rub salt in the wound for someone he particularly wanted to annoy. Belle paused, thinking it over.
"Yes. Yes I am," she replied firmly, not a trace of humour or doubt in her tone. He eyed her, surprised at how surreal the situation was. Belle, (his) smart, stubborn, beautiful girl was jealous thinking there used to be other women in his life.
"So, how many?" she demanded.
"Two, if you must know."
"Just two?" She sounded relieved and curious, as if she expected the number to be two hundred instead of two. It wouldn't be Belle if she didn't question further. "What happened?"
"We parted ways," he said and made a face when Belle looked at him expectantly, waiting for a more detailed answer. "They left me," he added shortly.
"Why?"
Like there was really any wonder in that. It was strange enough (lucky definitely not being the right word to describe those encounters) he did get into some twisted kind of relationship with those two women, considering his character and appearance.
"What do you mean, why? This," he swiped his hands down his front, "isn't a good enough reason not to get involved with me? Well, it certainly is sufficient to choose other, more important things."
"They're just stupid," Belle concluded. "But I am glad."
"You're glad I was used and discarded?" He said half-mockingly, raising his eyebrows.
"Oh no, not like that. I'm glad that I do not have to win you over," she actually blushed at that. "I hate the idea of competition."
He decided he wasn't ready to know why she'd ever want to win him over.
"You're truly remarkable," he drawled thoughtfully, speaking more to himself than Belle. "Unique I'd say."
"Why, thank you, Rumpelstiltskin," she grinned at him cheekily. "I do believe that's the most genuine complement I've heard from you so far."