Some things are more important than REM sleep.

It was almost midnight. Sheldon set his marker down and sighed. His latest theory was running him in circles. He was hungry and thirsty so he decided to make a trip to the vending machines. He was digging change out of his pocket and he swiftly turned the corner in the hallway and collided hard with someone. They fell to the floor in a tangle of limbs. One grunted and one shrieked.

"Would you please stop that caterwauling?!" a feminine voice said sternly.

Sheldon clamped his mouth shut and opened his eyes. A jean covered hip was centimeters from his nose. He gulped and clenched his hands involuntarily. The person on top of him squeaked loudly.

"Whoa, there buster! Bad touch!"

Sheldon looked down and saw his right hand squeezing a pert breast. He blushed and jerked his hand away. He tried to scramble backwards but this time the person yelped in pain.

"Holy crap on a cracker! Are you trying to kill me?!" Two green eyes glared up at him from his lap. "My hair is caught in your belt buckle. Can you untangle it?"

Sheldon looked a couple of inches to the side and saw a knot of hair caught in the belt buckle and the button of his chinos. He tentatively began working the knot free. A hand brushed his thigh as she tried to maneuver off his lap.

Sheldon was shocked by his body's reaction. He was even more embarrassed when she noticed. Which wasn't hard to do since her head was in that area. He groaned and tried to scramble away, once again pulling her hair. She gripped his hips tightly.

"Wait!" She sighed softly. "Okay. We're both embarrassed, right?" Sheldon nodded. "So, we're on equal footing. Let's just ignore the way our bodies are reacting to each other and try to get untangled. Before I end up bald."

Sheldon took a steady breath and set to work releasing her hair from his clothes. A couple of minutes later they were freed, and standing. Sheldon brushed off his pants while she pulled her hair back into a ponytail.

She held out her hand. "I'm Penny."

He shook it shyly. "Dr. Sheldon Cooper."

"You're here kind of late," she remarked.

"I am working on a theory," he replied. "I was just taking a break to get a snack." Sheldon was finding it difficult to look away from her twinkling eyes.

"So you're one of those beautiful mind geniuses?" she asked.

Sheldon's heart thumped loudly and he blushed again. "Yeah," he murmured.

Sheldon noticed how her eyes seemed glued to his lips. The pulse at her neck was beating furiously. He wet his lips with his tongue and her pupils dilated further. With a fair amount of pride he realized she was aroused. By him!

"I was just about to take a break and have some lunch," she said. "Would you like to join me? It's a large sub."

Sheldon had never had any interest in romance. He had no time for emotions or relationships. He definitely had no desire for desire. "I'd like that," he said shyly.

"Why are we doing this again?" Howard asked quietly.

Leonard adjusted his glasses and sighed. "Sheldon is acting weird. He's up to something. Three times this week he has come home and taken a three hour nap. Then he gets up to eat or watch something. At 11:30 those nights I hear him sneak out. He doesn't return until after 2am. I want to know what he's doing."

Raj yawned widely. "He's coming here. To work. What could he be up to?"

Howard looked at them with wide eyes. "Building a death ray? Creating Skynet? Who knows. It's Sheldon!"

They watched him open the university door and step inside. They followed at a distance, careful of his Vulcan hearing. They peered around the corner as he paused outside his office door and smoothed down his shirts. Then he opened his door and stepped inside. They tiptoed down the hall and heard voices through his door.

"Is that a girl?" Raj whispered in shock.

Leonard looked at them with surprise. "A video on his laptop, maybe?"

Howard stood and hurried down the hall. They scrambled to follow. They exited the building and made their away around the side. They slipped through the hedge and snuck close to Sheldon's window.

Three sets of eyes grew wide at all the exposed flesh. Three jaws sagged as their friend bent the blonde over the desk. Three pairs of ears heard a soft giggle turn into a faint moan. Seconds later three men hurried to the car promising to never, ever spy on Sheldon again.