So, the night wasn't as bad as I thought it would be. We ended up drinking most of it, ordering a pizza at one point and harassed the delivery boy, who seemed to shake the whole time. I ended up getting more comfortable around Alfred and Gilbert, even joking around with them. I can't remember the last time I was able to have a "guy night" like this and to be honest, I really missed it.
At some point, Mathias had told them that we were sleeping together. Alfred high-fived him, while Gilbert cheered because he ended up winning some bet. It wasn't really important to my drunken state and any thoughts that I might have been able to come up with disappeared when Mathias locked lips with mine in a celebratory, lust-filled kiss.
After a few more round and drinks, I was dragged to Mathias' bed, leaving his two guests to their own devises. The only thing that I could, vaguely, remember was the pleasure that ran through me till we ended up collapsing from exhaustion. The last thing I could recall is Mathias' arms wrapping around me before drifting off to sleep.
I was woken the next morning by kisses being placed all over my chest and neck. Opening my tired, aqua eyes, I was greeted with the sight of a grinning Dane. "Wow. You actually stayed the whole night instead of rushing off, Cinderella." He joked, giving me one last love bite. Grunting, I leaned over to give him a kiss. It was like thing at the start with Tino and I, because of that, the thought kept eating at me in the back of my mind. How long will this last? Will we eventually get tired of each other and move on? I can't do that to my boys ever again. I must have zoned out, because Mathias snapped his fingers in my face. "Hey, don't think too much right now. You're here to forget for a while and not worry about any of it." He remarked sitting up and hitting me with his pillow.
"Mathias?" I questioned as he reached over for his usual cigarette.
He put one in his mouth and light it before replying. "Yeah."
I hesitated for a minute. "Where do we stand?" I asked, ignoring my headache, ignoring the faint noises that started in the living room. The only thing that I was concentrating on was the closed off world with just Mathias and I.
Mathias froze, lighter still in hand and cigarette hanging from his lips. Looking towards me, he brought his hands to his lap. "How do you want me to respond to that?" I was confused by his answer. Was he just telling me what I wanted to hear? Before I could find the right words to say, the blond continued. "I can't decide this whole thing. You're apart of this too. I can't dictate your feelings or thoughts. You're your own person." He took a drag of his smoke and took the stick away from his mouth. "Since we're already on this topic, what do you want out of this? Out of what we've been doing?" Mathias asked, not sounding upset, but more curious himself.
Slowly sitting up and propping myself against the headboard, I put on my glasses from the other nightstand. "I have kids to think about." I replied, not looking at him. "I'm not allowed to be selfish and I don't think I could live with myself if I just abandoned them. I love them both too much." I stopped, biting the corner of my lip. "I can't put them through stuff like this again if we're not serious or something happens." Finally mustering up the courage, I looked up to see Mathias looking me over.
"I get it." He said, flicking some ashes in to the ash try by the bed. "Do you not want to try a real relationship with me? I understand if you don't for your kid's sake, but I want to make sure that's what you want. I don't mind fitting your need if you are looking to be serious." The way he said it, he made it seem like such a casual thing.
Looking over at him in shock, my heart began to race. "Do you really mean that?" I asked clenching the sheets in my fists. "Don't you know what that would entitle and what you would be giving up?" I probably should have been up selling myself rather than down, but I had to make sure he knew I meant it and I was doing well for my kids at the same time.
Mathias continued to enjoy his cigarette, ignoring the banging and loud yelling coming from the next room. "Yeah, I'd have to settle down, stop partying with my friends as much, not sleep with random people anymore…." That last one hurt and caused me to wince. "But I will say, don't come between me and my drinking. I'll cut it back a little around the kids, but no way in Hell am I going to lose that in this merger." He stubbed out the stick before lying back on my lap. "Is that understood by you?" Mathias asked, giving me a grin.
A soft smile spread on my face. "Okay." I remarked, as I couldn't help but start running my fingers through his devastated hair.
Mathias motioned for me to bend down, to which I obliged, earning a kiss. "When do you have to go back to work?" Was his next question as he fiddled with the sheet draped over my lower half.
"Monday. Boss gave me Thursday and Friday off last week 'cause of my overtime." I let my eyes scan over his tanner skin, almost covering the light freckles that were dusted across his cheeks and along the bridge of his nose. "You work tonight correct? What about Tomorrow night?" I asked lacing his free hand in mine.
Hmming contently, Mathias stretched out his back and nodded. "Yeah I work tonight and tomorrow. Will you be fine here, or are you going to go out?" He countered as his fiddled with my hand.
"I have to get a few more things from the house and some paperwork that I didn't get to, but that's about it." I paused thinking about my sons. "I might stay the night there so I can talk to my kids about the whole thing. Maybe see what Tino wants to do with our assets." My head shot up when something hit the door.
Mathias also turned his attention to it. "Quit braking my apartment! It's not much but it's mine!" He yelled to his friends, who could be heard laughing. "Those jerks." The Dane smiled and rolled off my lap. "That's fine, just text me and let me know if you're staying the night so I'm not surprised when your not back." Throwing on his sweatpants from last night, he stretched his arms up giving me a clear view of the pin-up mermaid he had tattooed on the left side of his rib cage while the Viking knots on his right shoulder became distorted. Tino didn't have any tattoos, which might have been a factor in Mathias and my relationship. Even though there were something similar between them, there were far more things different. "Get dressed so I can try and kick those idiots out." He said in jest.
I nodded, shifting carefully, as to not strain my soar muscles, getting out of bed and grabbed a shirt and loose pants. By the time I was dressed, Mathias was already in the living room and yelling over his guests about him having to work and not wanting to deal with them and customers. It was all with an underline of joking and they all laughed during the whole ordeal. Walking out, I was able to catch Mathias waving them off before turning to me. "You hungry? I'm making some late breakfast." He said slapping me on my ass as he made his way to the kitchen.
"Don't." I glared at him and rubbed the stinging spot. Following him to the small space, I saw him banging around with pans and ingredients. "Can I use your shower first?" I asked trying not to think anything dirty when he bent over.
"You don't have to ask if you'll be living with me. Mi hus er dit hus." He replied in his native tongue. It dawned on me that when I lived in Sweden, my mother wanted me to learn Danish when she got remarried, but I never took my time to learn Tino's language. Maybe I was more like my mother than I thought I was, leaving my first family for a Dane, that seems to be a theme.
"Tak." I muttered before going to wash myself. After getting undressed and in the shower, I let out a content sigh as the warm water cascaded down my body. I had just finished rinsing the conditioner out of my hair when I heard a knock on the bathroom door. "Ja?" I yelled over the water.
Opening the door, Mathias slid in with my phone. "Your son is on the phone."
I quickly turned off the water and snatched the phone from the other blond, not caring that I was still wet. "Hello?" I answered it, panic finding it's way in my voice.
"Dad? Are you going to be coming home today? I want to make sure I'll be here if so." Peter asked.
"Ja, don't worry about that. Do you want me to stay the night too? We can go to a movie or whatever you want." I replied, doing whatever I could do to make the whole situation up to him.
There was a pause on the other side. "Yeah, that would be fun. Thanks dad." Peter said before hanging up.
Setting my phone on the sink, I wrapped a towel around my waist and got out of the shower as I ignored Mathias. Anger found it's way through my veins as he just stood there, waiting for me to say something. I brushed my teeth and when I was done, I leaned on the sink. "Don't answer my phone again." I muttered through gritted teeth.
"Sorry, I just thought you'd want to talk to him." Mathias countered, but it didn't calm me.
"No. They don't know who you are and it'll make it worse when and if you meet them. I don't want Tino finding out about you by you picking up my phone. Please, just leave it alone." I practically growled at him. Mathias stood there in silence. My eyes soffened when I saw the hurt look in his own. "I'm sorry, I just don't know how to handle all this." My parents didn't handle their divorce well and I suffered through it, I was the one who ended up suffering the most though.
Mathias shook his head. "I get it, but…." He trailed off like he was thinking about how he wanted to work his next question. "When are you going to tell Tino about us?" The Dane asked.
I thought for a second. There wouldn't be a good time in the near future and it would be hard to explain why I was living with Mathias. "I guess I'll have to tonight." I said giving him a worried look. Nodding Mathias ran a hand though his hair before walking out. Good thing I had a fun time last night.
Translation:
Mi hus er dit hus (Danish): My house is your house.
Tak (Swedish/Danish): Thank you.
Ja (Swedish/Danish): Yeah.
A/N: I don't know when the next time I'll be able to post is, but I want to thank the people who have reviewed so far. :) Thanks so much!