Hope you enjoy this chapter, please review. Thanks Jodie. xx
Chapter Three
"Please..." she called "I know you dont want to dig up the past no one does.. but I have speant the last six years mourning him.. I need the truth.. I have to know why everyone lied to me.. why Smithy walked away so easily.." she sighed before wiping her eyes, she turned away but hearing the door creek she turned back. "Come in.." he spoke his voice hushed and his figure hidden in the darkness "Quickly". She moved inside and smiled as he ushered her into the living room, she was surprised by the sight infront of her, the room was dim and there was stacks of newspapers piled up and down the walls. The table was covered in photos the of Grace and Jake and the room was covered in cobwebs and dust, she turned back to the man "When did you last see Jake?" she asked and he moved over quickly pulling the many photos into a pile and taking them and resting them onto the fireplace, he was limping as he walked and she thought back to the fire and how he had seriously hurt his leg. As he turned back she was shocked, he had old stubble on his face and his normally well trimmed hair was shaggy and out of place, she frowned as he moved back towards her "He didnt do it easily..." he spoke and she frowned "What?" she asked and he sighed "Smithy.. he didnt walk away easily". She frowned "What happened?" she asked. He shook his head "Its more than my life is worth..." she cut in "This isnt fair... I know the man I love is still alive.. I want to know.. how the hell this happened.. I need to know why everyone I know and trust lied to me.." he cut in "They didnt.. everyone was lead to believe he had died.. but.. there was a lot that I cant discuss.." she cut in "I cant believe this... I have mourned him.. I have speant years in therapy... and my little boy is growing up believing his daddy is dead". Neil sighed "It wasnt a desicion we took lightly..." she laughed as she rose to her feet "Lightly... why dont you try living my life for a day... feeling what I am feeling.. I have blaimed myself for six years... knowing if I hadnt of got involved with Oliver... this wouldnt of happened.. and it was all a lie.." he shook his head "I know its not much but he loved you Smithy he hated it but he had no choice.. Jack and I did what was best.." she smiled as she moved back over to him "And I deserve an explanation Neil?". He shook his head "I cant help you anymore.." she sighed "Why?". He sighed "I think you should leave now.." she frowned, she knew she got all she could out of him "Have you contacted Grace recently?" she asked and he sighed "Goodbye Stevie". She smiled "I know she would want to hear from you.." he cut in "Go.. get out.." he shouted "Now" he moved to the stack of papers, pushed them accross the floor and she headed out of the door as quickly as she could.
Stevie sat in the car, thinking over the information, she closed her eyes letting the tears roll down her cheeks, the last six years of her life had been a lie and she was sure as hell going to find out why everyone lied to her. As soon as Jack found out that she knew, he would begin to close ranks, she had to do her digging and quickly if she was to find out what really happened the night Smithy had died. Thinking back she could see him, his cheeky smile, his flirty wink, them thoughts had got her through the last six years. She cared about Andrew, she really did, but he would never be her happy ending. Blinking back the tears she glanced up at Neils house and seeing his net twitch, she rose her hand to wave goodbye to the man she knew was watching, her former boss, her former friend before starting the car and heading towards the station, intend on doing some more digging, she had to know, she needed to know the truth. She flicked the radio on and humed along to the music, she needed a distraction. She was tempted to call Grace, inform her of the way Neil was living, the recluse he had clearly become. Neil had returned breifly after the fire, but due to post tramatic stress he had quit only days later, with immediate effect and she had been offered the promotion, Jack thinking it would give her some thing to focus on, to cope with her grief. Neil had vanished from everyones lives overnight, and despite the best attempts of many memebers of staff he wouldnt have contact with anyone, so eventually they gave up. This had come the hardest to Grace, she too was mourning her lover and it had brought her and Stevie closer together. Grace had spent weeks trying to contact Neil and get him to speak of his feelings to open up to her, that was until the day she came to work with a black eye and she never again mentioned the former DI. Stevie tried to ask on a few occasions, but knowing how hard it is herself to talk about a love you have lost she soon decided it was best to keep her friends mind from the situation.
Arriving at the station she headed inside, smiling as she passed people. It was late and she knew really she should of headed home to see her son, but she would send Callum a quick text and then crack on with finding out what was going on. Arriving in CID she headed into her office and sunk down in her chair before flicking her computer on. She jumped as the voice echoed from the door way "Stevie... you are here late?" she glanced up at Jack and nodded slightly "Yes Sir.. I could say the same about you and besides I am looking into Smithys death..." he frowned "It was six years ago..." she glared at him "You lied to me Jack". He frowned "You need to stop what ever little fantasy you have going on here DI Moss... let it go.." she cut in "So you arent denying he is alive?". He shook his head "I am saying... what ever this little scheme you have going on... bury it" she rose to her feet "The day Smithy died... I have never recovered... I lost a huge part of me.. and you know what it was a lie.." he cut in "Smithy is gone... he is dead". She shouted "But he isnt is he..." he nodded "He is dead Stevie.. and if you believe different your losing it" he turned to the door and she frowned "I have been to see Neil" he turned back to her and smiled "Why?" he asked and she smiled "Because despite what you have said... and that he was just as vague... I know that I saw Smithy and that he is alive... and he may of walked away from me and Dale but there is no way I can walk away from him... not until I at least know why". Jack turned and stormed from the room and that just made her more determined to find out the truth.
"You need to walk away.." the man stressed. He glanced out of the car window and sighed "I dont think I can Jack... I cant walk away from Stevie again..." the man cut in "She has moved on.." Smithy laughed "Well clearly not... she broke down when she saw me.." Jack laughed "What would you do if you saw someone you believed to be dead?" he asked. Smithy pulled his hood off and turned to the man "I spend every minute of every day.. thinking.. wondering what my life would be like.. if we would be married by now.. maybe we would of had kids.. we had so many plans.." Jack frowned "And you know why you had to leave her behind.. it was for the best". Smithy frowned "I love her Jack" he nodded "Then you cant put her in danger..." he cut in "Why do you think I havent seen her... I just walked away... my life has been hell.." Jack frowned "Yeah... I hear Cyprus is a horrible place to live". Smithy frowned "If I hadnt of found out... would you of told me... that my mum was dead..". Jack smiled "She wasnt your mum any more... you have a new identidy... Dale Smith doesnt exisit". Smithy grabbed for the door handle and Jack frowned "Do the right thing... leave and dont come back Smithy... you know as well as I do the danger.. you and Stevie would be in". Smithy pulled his hood up and sighed "Tell her I love her" Jack shook his head "You know I cant do that". Smithy sighed "You have no idea what I have been through... I love Stevie so much". He opened the car door and made his way into the darkness.
Stevie moved into the kitchen with the man close behind her "Look Stevie... we need to get us sorted..". When she had returned home Callum was gone, leaving Dale with Andrew, she hadnt been thankful, especially as she wanted to continue with her digging. She frowned "Not now Andrew.." he smiled "Why?" he asked "Because Dale is sleeping and I need.. I need to get some sleep... to think things over.." he laughed "You promised you would commit..." he paused, staring at her "Tell me you love me" he stressed "Tell me you are in love with me". She turned away "I cant Andrew" he laughed "I will never be number one... I will never come first.." she sighed "I am sorry but.." he cut in "Dont bother Stevie" she grabbed his wrist "I do love you.. just not in the right way". He shrugged "So why bother". She leant into his lips and kissed him "Because I want you... stay" he shook his head "I cant Stevie... I have to be in work early tomorrow... I havent got my things.." she ran her hand down his chest "Well surely you can spare me... a few minutes before you go home.." she leant into his ear "Come to bed". She led the way to the bedroom, closing her eyes as she went, this wasnt what she wanted, she wanted Smithy back but right now, she had to keep Andrew onside and this was the best way to do it.
She had shown him out just under an hour later before she checked in on her son. Heading into the kitchen she flicked the kettle on and grabbed a mug from the cupboard "Who is he?" the voice startled her and she dropped the cup, she turned to see the man stood in the back door way. She felt the tears stain her cheeks as she smiled "Smithy". She smiled as he removed his hood and she stared at him, his eyes were dark and his skin tanned, his hair shaved and stubble on his face, she moved towards him slightly and reached towards his face, she touched him gently, using her knuckles to graze the prickle of his hair, before pulling her hand away and slapping him violently round the face. His hand shot to the sore spot on his face and he smiled "Im sorry". He reached for her and she stepped back "Six years Smithy... how could you?" she asked and he sighed "I had no choice Stevie". She frowned at him "You couldnt phone... send me a letter... just to let me know you were alive". He shook his head "You would of tourtured your self". She laughed "Oh yeah... and its just been a walk in the park... believeing you were dead.. and it was all my fault". He sighed "Jack told me you were coping..." she cut in "Well Jack told me you were fucking dead Smithy". He sighed "Aint you even going to offer me a drink?" he asked and she shook her head "I have finally moved on.. I need you to go..". He smiled "Is he good enough for you?" he asked and she sighed "Andrew is lovely... I am happy" his eyes fell to the floor and she smiled "But he is not you". Smithy sighed "I love you Stevie Moss... and there will never be anyone else.. nobody will come close." he placed his hand to her face and sighed "I should go... look after yourself..." leaning into her lips, he pecked her gently as he pulled back she grabbed his hand and smiled "How could you leave me Smithy... you say you love me... how can you walk away from the person you love". He smiled "There are people after me... Oliver... he was a lot more connected than we ever believed... I couldnt put you in harms way... as soon as it was leaked he had died.. there were people who wanted to avenge his death.. they wanted me dead... so it was easier for me to already be dead.. you have no idea how hard it was to leave you and my mum behind..". He grinned "You are beautiful". She sighed "I dont want you to go... let me come with you..". He sighed "Stevie.. I am living life on the run.. I have a whole new identidy.. I couldnt do it to you". He moved into her lips and pulled her tight into his body, his hands playing in her hair, she was in the most perfect place, she wanted to hate him, to be mad at him but right now, she couldnt let him go, she loved him so much, she ached for him, she needed him. Hearing the soft voice from the room down the hall she pulled back from the man and he glanced away before turning back to the blonde detective "Who is that?" he asked and she smiled "Thats Dale.. my son... our son Smithy".