When Jane had joined Maura on the couch, she pulled out her phone and set it down gently in her lap, screen up. She set her palms flat against her thighs and wiped them slowly, hoping the soft material of her sweats would soak up her moist hands. She could feel the muscles in her fingers twitch and suddenly her scars started a dull ache. She brought her hands to her chest and rubbed her scars firmly as she stared at her phone. Maura leaned forward to the coffee table and turned the television off, then leaned back and turned slightly to Jane. Her eyes moved between Jane's eyes unblinking and her hands unresting.

"Hey," she said with a gentle touch to Jane's upper thigh. The brunette looked over at Maura and hated that her mind had gotten them back into this situation. She remembered sitting on her own couch after Hoyt had gotten back into her life the first time. She'd gone out for a drink with Maura before they came back and started cleaning up her trashed apartment. She'd had four beers and each time when she reached for another sip of one, she noticed that her bottle was empty. After her third was empty and she raised her hand for the bartended to bring her another, the blonde had leant over and whispered over the music and chatter of the Dirty Robber and suggested that they go home to Jane's after this one. Jane had nodded and despite her efforts to make the fourth beer last, it was soon gone and her body buzzed again.

She'd busied herself with breaking already smashed pieces of shelves and ornaments and tattered furniture pieces when they got back home. She didn't want to think about much; she just wanted to get out her frustration and immense hatred for this creature that was after her in some way. She'd cried in front of Maura before, and although she felt a little uncomfortable at first, Maura had made it so unbelievably easy to let it all out. She'd sat down next to the crying brunette as she sat huddled in the corner of her bedroom with her hands bandaged after Hoyt's attack, not even able to wipe away her own tears with the backs of her hands because they hurt so much. Maura had sat down and placed a pillow on her lap. Jane let herself fall limp against it and eventually cried herself to sleep.

This time though, she wasn't going to cry. Not just yet, anyway. She had a messy war zone like apartment to deal with and crying wasn't going to make it any easier or quicker, so she forged on. After hours of discarding broken bits and pieces, and having given the whole place a good clean, Jane sat down on her couch as the morning sunlight seeped in through her blinds and rested on her tired face and burned her reddened eyes. Maura slumped down next to her and rested her head against the back of the couch but lifted it up when she felt Jane's weight on the couch shift. Jane sat back up with her phone resting in her hands and a little scrap of cardboard pinched between her fingers. Maura read the name that was one it and placed her hands over Jane's, covering the name.

"It's going to be alright again," Maura said, gently rubbing Jane's thigh as the brunette gazed back at the phone in her lap.

"I hate how I've called him so many times before, but I'm still nervous."

"You have a right to be. But I'm not going to let you go through this alone, so dump your nervousness on me as much as you want."

"Okay." Jane said it in response to Maura's suggestion, but she told herself that it meant she was ready to call him, so she picked up her phone and dialled his number. She hung up in less than a minute and gave Maura a shaky smile. "Tomorrow. Four o'clock."

"Okay." Jane wished it would all just be okay already. She was sick of this happening. It made her tired and cold even though it was sunny outside. She pulled a cushion from beside her and placed it on Maura's lap before lying down and slowly letting the tears fall.

At half past three the next day, Maura arrived up in homicide to collect Jane for her appointment. She smiled at Korsak and Frankie as she picked up her jacket and walked over to Maura by the door and slipped her hand straight into the blonde's open one. She knew that her actions would probably show that she was feeling a little depressed and just wanted to curl up into a ball at Maura's side like a puppy, but she didn't care. She knew she was feeling depressed. She'd felt like this when Frost had died. She just wanted to cry and sleep. The fact that she realised that she was slipping back into that depth of misery, and that she was watching it happen scared her.

When they arrived at Dr. Anthony Kenneth's office, they took a seat in the waiting room and not five minutes later, the tall clean-shaven man stepped out with a sympathetic smile on his face. "Hi, Jane."

"Hi, Dr. Kenneth."

"Would you like to go in and wait for me?"

"Sure," she tried to say with a little life in her voice, but instead she sounded like... well, the depressed person she always seemed to be when she came in here.

"Hello, Dr. Isles."

"Please, call me Maura. I'm not here as Jane's friend now; I'm here as her girlfriend, so please tell me whatever you need me to do for her to feel better."

"Of course, Maura. Well, I'm going to work alone with her for a bit; do a bit of hypnosis so I can understand fully what's going on and how it's affecting Jane, and then I'll get you in and we can all have a bit of a talk about what we can do to help Jane get past this."

"Okay, sounds good." She took a seat down directly across from the door where she could see Jane's leg as she sat on the couch. There was one foot on the ground and then a discarded shoe, so Maura assumed that Jane had one leg tucked up under her other one in an effort to feel somewhat at home.

"We hopefully won't be too long," Dr Kenneth said, before turning to his receptionist. "Callie?"

"Yep." The doctor turned and walked back into his office and closed the door. Maura's eyes followed his footsteps the entire time until the door cut them away and then looked up at the perky blonde with glasses that stood in front of her. "Can I get you a coffee or anything?"

"No thank you; maybe just a glass of water?"

"Absolutely," she said and then walked away. Maura's eyes drifted back to the closed door and strained her ears to hear Jane's or Dr Kenneth's voice above the deafening silence. Callie returned a moment later with a glass of water, and Maura took a large sip of it immediately. She set down the half empty glass and picked up a magazine to distract her. Celebrities did something, events happened somewhere, money was spent, parties were hosted; Maura didn't care. Her eyes kept wandering back to the doorknob of the door that separated her and Jane and occasionally fell down to the crack under the door as a shadow passed it. She slouched back in the chair and tossed the magazine onto the empty chair beside her. She breathed deeply for a moment or two and then glanced at her watch. They had been in there for half an hour and it was absolutely killing Maura.

She thought back to when she and Jane weren't yet together and she'd stayed awake at night thinking of how their lives would be better together every day and night, not that they weren't already sort of doing that. But she'd told herself that Jane's nightmares would stop and that they would be replaced with dreams of their future; she told herself that no matter what they went through, they would come out the other end stronger and more in love than ever; she'd told herself that she would fight every day to make Jane not feel any pain ever again. She closed her eyes to stop the tears as she realised she'd failed. She opened her eyes and leant forward to grab her glass when the water in it rippled.

She hadn't registered what had happened at first until her mind began to clear and it happened again. There was a thump on the wall coming from Dr. Kenneth's office and then she heard Jane call her name. She stood up and barrelled over to the door but before she could open it Callie had jumped in front of her and placed her hands on her upper arms.

"Dr Kenneth's got her under hypnosis. She's alright, just let him-"

"I know; let him do his job. I'm sorry."

"Not at all," Callie said and then walked Maura back over to the chair she was sitting in. Maura had no idea how she was staying so calm and level headed when the goddamn love of her life was going through mental and emotional distress just beyond a door and she couldn't get to her. She rested her forehead in her hands and then quickly came back up for that water. She gulped it down and then Dr. Kenneth's door opened.

"Is she okay?"

"She's fine," Dr. Kenneth said as he opened his arm for Maura to walk past him to see Jane. She moved in swiftly and saw Jane standing by the couch with half of her bottom lip sucked in between her teeth.

"Hey," she said, feeling as if she hadn't seen Jane in months.

"Hey," Jane replied, popping her bottom lip out, revealing that there was a slight split on it and the blood was oozing out fairly quickly.

"Jane!"

"I'm okay, Maura," she said although she gladly let Maura cradle her head in her hands and kiss her forehead and dab at her lip with the soft pad of her thumb.

"I'm sorry about that; we just went over Jane's dream during hypnosis," the doctor said as he closed the door.

"So you know what happened?" Maura asked, although she knew he obviously did for her had just relived Jane's dream with her.

"Yes; and I believe I know why it's happening so strongly for you Jane, and why you, Maura, are involved in this so heavily."

"Heavily?"

"Yes; well, you see it's like this. Jane, you once told me that you didn't want a man in your life because he would love you but not want you to do this job, correct?"

"Yeah," Jane said as she tightly squeezed Maura's hand. They sat down together on the couch and Jane felt comforted by the warmth radiating off the other woman.

"But, Maura has always been a big part of your life." Jane nodded. "I believe that in the past, you have been haunted by your own demons because of your own experiences, but now as you have in a sense shared half of yourself with Maura, and vice versa, you've begun experiencing her trauma as well."

"That's all very speculative, Doctor."

"I know. I'm not a cop; I can't get solid evidence in the form of a tangible object or anything like that, but I can tell you, Jane, based on your experiences to do with Hoyt, and essentially sacrificing yourself for your friends and family when you shot yourself, love is a big factor in why you had this nightmare."

"I'm confused; you're saying I had this nightmare because I love Maura?"

"Pretty much," he said, making Jane slouch back in the couch in what appeared to be disappointment to Maura, so she pushed forward.

"So what you're getting at is that when Hoyt targeted her the last time and also attacked me, it was because he'd realised that we meant... that we were..."

"That we loved each other more than anyone else," Jane chimed in.

"Yes; and when Jane shot herself to save Frankie, and Barry, and Vince and me, that she was doing this because she loves us and we love her, and when this happened to me, a metaphorical part of her was there with me?"

"Something like that." The look on Jane's face was that of pure confusion, but Maura understood, more or less. "Look, it's the brain; it's a tricky thing; and as Jane's had these nightmares, I'm going to say that you've had your own, too Maura, am I right?"

"Yes."

"What?" Jane butted in, looking at Maura. "You've had nightmares too?"

"Yeah."

"I mean... of course you have be... but-"

"Jane; I used to have nightmares about Hoyt, too; and not just when he attacked me... before then. I used to see myself standing over you as you..." she took a deep breath and squeezed Jane's hand. "As you were pinned to the ground and he was standing over you; I used to see it, and every time I went to tell you, you ended up coming over and staying anyway, so I never told you. And when you shot yourself; your blood was on my hands in every dream; when I was crouching over your body, when you were in the hospital bed, even when you got home and were getting better."

"Did you know this was what was happening to me?"

"No, darling, I didn't. I didn't even really understand why it was happening to me, but I think now, that it was because... I loved you. I was in love with you and that's why I had those nightmares."

"Oh, Maura." Jane threw her arms around Maura's neck and dug her fingertips into the blonde's hair and clothes and pulled her close. Maura squeezed back with as much force until she could hardly breath, but she didn't care. They were so much a part of each other's lives that they had, in ways, become one person, which for them at the moment was causing some serious drama, but on a larger scale, was incredibly romantic. Maura thought about just how romantic it was and it made her smile from ear to ear as she closed her eyes and breathed Jane in, feeling her arms squeeze her.