42 squeezes his eyes closed and tries not to gag as he tastes the bitter seed that coats the back of his throat. After several more thrusts, Master pulls his head away from his pelvis and lays back on the bed. He sighs and outstretches an arm, waiting for 42 to curl up next to him.
Except he doesn't move a single muscle.
"Come here," Master orders. He remains. Master digs his nails into his arm and yanks him down. A loud cry of pain emits from 42's throat. He feels Master smile against his shoulder as he kisses the knobby flesh. "You're such a good boy, you're my good boy..."
The compliments make his stomach flutter, much like the delicate caresses on his arms and chest. He shivers and closes his eyes as he feels Master's fingers trail down his abdomen.
He can fight back. He can demand to have the answers; Craig knows who he is. Craig has everything he needs. He needs to get back to him.
He's not going to fight back. Instead he'll play right along. He needs to know the truth.
"Thank you," 42 whispers, closing his eyes as he feels a thumb press against his hip bone, which juts out from starvation.
"You know I don't want to kill you, you're my favorite, pet..." he doesn't move. His hands are almost on him now. "But I can't have you misbehaving, and I surely can't have you influencing 43. Isn't that right?" He nods.
What's going to happen? What does this mean? He gasps as Master strokes him slowly. This is new; no one has done this before.
"Does that feel good?" Master asks, then bites his shoulder. 42 gasps out loud and feels his legs spread as his body gives in to the ministrations. "This is what you should do, make people feel good... do you do this?"
"Mm..." he falters, then tries his best to nod, "Y-yes, M-Master..." he moans. His face is hot, the pressure in his stomach feels different now. He barely registers the pain as he feels the ring of muscles around his abused entrance contract.
"You know I love you, right?" His eyes stare right into Master's; he's hypnotized. He loves him. He knows he loves him. He can feel it. No one has ever made him feel like this.
"Yes..."
"And I only hurt you to punish you for being bad. I don't want to do it. When I hurt you it hurts me, you realize that? You hurt me, so much."
42 feels the hand tighten around his arousal and he lets out a strained whimper.
"So much it almost kills me," he feels nails scrape along his sensitive flesh. No, no, not that. Make it feel good again. His body jerks and he curls his toes as he silently begs for the release of this built up pressure. It hurts, it hurts, it hurts.
"I'm s-sorry," he manages, "I won't hurt you again." Master nods and runs a hand through his hair.
"Lay on me," 42 lies back against Master's chest and rests his head on his shoulder. This feels right. This feels like love. He wants this. "Someone is going to try to take you away from me tonight."
His eyes open and he glances back, trying to get a look at Master's face.
"W-"
"But they won't love you... not when they see you, you realize that? You're hideous. You're nothing. You are deformed. You're very bad, aren't you?" He trembles as he nods. "No one can love a bad slave. No one can love something like you, can they?" He remains silent. "Can they?"
But Craig...
42 closes his eyes and shakes his head.
"No, Master. I'm not... h-huh..." he trails off as Master's hand begins to stroke him again, "I'm not worth anyone's love."
"No, you're not," his eyes burn. "But you know what?" His legs shake as Master presses his solid member against his torn hole. "I love you, and only I will." His face flushes darker as he feels his head rub against him. Oh God he wants it.
"M-Master, please..." he whines, pressing himself as hard as he can against Master. "I-I want you to... to make love to me. P-please...?"
He feels Master pull away from him. His hand releases his arousal and he lets out a moan of anguish. His body twitches with this sudden need he's never quite felt. He needs it bad.
42 falls off the bed as Master swings his fist into his cheek. He howls in pain and clutches his stomach as he crashes to the floor. Despite the fatal ache in his body, he still feels the twinges of lust.
"You want me to make love to you?" He hears his voice bellow. 42 can taste blood as he feels a kick to his side. He wasn't thinking, he shouldn't have...
"I'm sorry, I..." he trails off, "I didn't mean to. Master, I only live to serve you... to love you. Only you." He sees a silver glint in Master's hand.
"You only live..." he sees the blade and closes his eyes. Oh God, not like 40. Not like 40. "Because I let you. Give me your foot."
"Wh-wha..." he outstretches his leg and winces as Master twists his foot. Bones pop, and he fights off the urge to scream. The knife is thrown on the floor, and he drops his foot to walk over to his dresser. 42 bites down on his lip; he feels blood gush in his mouth as he splits the flesh.
Master turns around and has a pair of wrench.
Oh no.
"M-Master, p.. please?!" he begs, "I... I didn't run, I didn't... I thought... you said you love me!" he cries finally, the tears burn his cheeks.
"I do," Master lifts his leg again, and grabs holds his heel as he clamps the wrench around his big toe.
"Then why do you hurt me?! I've done nothing wrong, I just want to feel you love me. I just want to feel LOVED!"
His eyes roll in the back of his head as a boiling jolt of pain runs through his nerves. A sickening crunch fills the room and his body seizes from the horror.
With his eyes closed he sees Craig, he sees another man who told him he loved him, he sees the pizza man.
"Kenny McCormick?" he hears the voice echo in his head.
"I'm sorry, I don't know who that is."
He opens his eyes and finds himself in the basement once more. As his eyes adjust, he lurches forward, the contents of his stomach spilled from his mouth as he sees his toe next to him.
He doesn't glance down. He can't.
As he comes to he realizes he is alone. Craig is gone. Where did he go? What did they do to him? He wants Craig. He wants the answers.
"Kenny McCormick?" he hears the pizza man's voice once more in his brain.
"I'm 42," he whimpers, wrapping his arms around himself. "I am nobody. I am nothing... Craig, you lied to me... you don't know me... I'm going to die tomorrow. I will have served my Master, my purpose done. I'm nothing without him. I love Master. I would die for Master..."
But Master won't die for him. Master will kill him. Master loves him... he has to love him. Why else would he punish him? Because he hurts him. 42 is nothing but trouble. He causes pain. He's terrible. He deserves to die, he shouldn't hurt anyone anymore.
He is proud to be 42. 41 was the best though. She loved Master, she gave him children. He could never do that. He presses his hand to his stomach and clutches the skin tightly; if only he could bear children. Then Master would love him. Master would be so happy.
They would be vile children. Just like him. Master would have them killed. Just like him.
He lays down and closes his eyes. With his arms around himself he rocks back and forth slowly and begins to hum. He likes the sound it makes. Humming makes him happy, makes him fall asleep. He wonders if that's what music is like. He doesn't remember music. He doesn't think he ever had the chance to hear it.
He wakes up when he feels a gentle hand touch his arm. He opens his eyes and finds Craig looking down at him with a cut on his face and his left eye swollen shut. He's shivering, he's sweaty. He looks haunted.
"Is it your first time?" He asks weakly, Craig remains silent.
"What if..." he trails off, "what if I told you we could get out of here?" 42 closes his eyes. Escape isn't be worth it; running will kill him. The last time he did... he shudders. He remembers the electric currents running through his body. He can't do that again.
"No, I'm not leaving Master. You shouldn't either. Are you hurt? Did they fuck you?" Craig's eyes are glassy. "You didn't say no, did you?" he receives no answer, "you can't say no, you can't... I told you... oh, Master will be so upset."
"Fuck your Master," Craig's voice trembles, his shoulders shake, "they tied me down... I can fight, they knew that. And they... oh God, it hurts..."
"Lay down," he says, "on your stomach, I-I'll... make sure you're okay." Craig shakes his head.
"Don't... fuck, they... how can they do this?"
"It's what we are," he answers, running a soft hand down his back. He feels Craig flinch, hears the catch in his throat. "I won't hurt you."
"How many times have you heard that?" His eyes lower.
"I only hurt myself... I love them. I want to make them happy. It's what I'm here for. Today's my last day... I'm dying soon. I've done my job, and I haven't done it well."
"Be-because you know it's wrong!" Craig's voice cracks, "fuck..." 42's hand rests on his rump and he tenses.
"Don't..."
"Can I make sure you're okay? Tomorrow you have to be. Even if it hurts you have to be okay."
"Fuck tomorrow..." Craig sighs, "it hurts, Kenny..."
42 freezes.
Kenny. Kenny McCormick.
"Who is that?" he whispers, slowly spreading his cheeks. There's blood. Not a lot. Craig whimpers.
"Your name's Kenny. Kenny McCormick. We went to high school together."
He went to high school? He knows him. Craig knows who he is. He's the second person to say that name. The pizza man. He has to know the pizza man.
"I didn't go to school, I was found as a baby by Master."
"Do you remember growing up with that psycho?" 42 feels around his hole; they didn't use lubrication. He pulls his hand away; that's all he needs to know. The rest is self-explanatory; he's been through it enough to know there was tearing and bruising.
"You'll get used to it, sometimes it even feels good..." he trails off, "I don't remember growing up. I don't remember very much. I just remember Master, 41, and my home. This is my home. This is all I know..."
"He stole you. You have a mom and dad who are still looking for you. You have a brother, an older brother. You have a younger sister. You have friends who haven't stopped looking for you, and we've found you, Kenny."
"You're lying!" he cries, retracting from Craig. "You... you're trying to trick me. I'm nothing. NOTHING! And so are you!"
He sees Craig glance around him. His eyes settle on something.
"What the hell is that?" He asks; 42 follows his gaze.
"My toe."
Craig lets out a whine and rests his head on the cement floor.
"Why? What the fuck?! How are you okay with that?! How are you not in pain?"
"Because I'm bad, because I deserve it. Pain is my punishment and I deserve it. You deserve this, you fought back. You told them no. You're just like me and you can't be. You won't make it."
"You're fucking sick," Craig spits, "to believe that we deserve to be cut up and raped. They've got you... so wound around their fingers that you can't see what they're doing is wrong."
'They saved me. Master loves me, he's the only person who loves me. It's not wrong, it's what we're made to do." Craig curls his legs to his chest.
"My... my master wants you. My master wants to take you with us. He's coming to get us." 42 narrows his eyes.
"Master told me," his voice is cold; it shocks Craig.
"You remember a few weeks back? There was this guy... he bought you for the night. Got you chocolate?" 42 closes his eyes. He remembers that; he remembers that well. It's the reason why he's blind in his right eye.
"Yes."
"That's my master."
He had been nice. He held him, told him he loved him. He actually believed him when he said it. No wonder Craig is so useless. He doesn't know the ropes. His master knows nothing. He can't live like that.
"Oh."
But can he? He could live each day and not be fucked. He could be held and given chocolate. He could have a say. Maybe that master will grow to love him too. Maybe he'll make love to him. He told him no, but maybe... maybe he would.
He lowers his head. No one will. No one will ever make him feel loved. Because he's not. No one loves him. No one but Master. And Master won't waste his time feeding his wrongful lust.
"I... I want you to come with me."
"You lie," he replies, "you're trying to hurt me. I've done nothing wrong... I'm nice to you. Why do you want to hurt me? I'm no one. I'm nothing. I have no name. No one loves me... only Master. He almost made love to me, you know," he wants to make Craig jealous. Master loves him far more than Craig's could ever love him.
"What do you mean?"
"Master loves me, I asked him to."
"Is that why you lost your toe?"
He remains silent. Craig's tone was condescending; he didn't like it.
He doesn't have a chance to reply. The door opens and Craig whimpers. 42 watches him recoil and try to disappear in the shadows. It won't work; they always find him. There is no use in trying to hide; their eyes always shine so bright when they're scared. He hasn't been scared in a long time.
He turns around and kneels when he sees Master. He lowers his head and lets out a purr as Master rakes his fingers through his hair.
"43, come out here, I'm not going to hurt you." 42 can assure him this; his voice isn't sadistic. He just wants to talk. He nuzzles his head in his thigh. Master laughs. "You're affectionate tonight, pet."
"Only for you, Master."
Craig hobbles out of the corner. He has a limp as he walks. 42 realizes he's taller than Master. He's so beautiful. Lean and strong; he closes his eyes. He can only think of Master like this.
"I apologize for my men's behavior, I did not permit this to happen. If there is anything I can do to accommodate you, let me know. I suspect my pet has informed you well?" Craig remains tight lipped. "I suggest you speak."
"Yes, perfectly well, thank you," his tone is threatening. 42 turns to him with a look of surprise. The expression on his face is one he has never seen on another slave. He's challenging Master.
"Your Master hasn't done well in showing you your place, has he? I'm unsure if I can allow my best to go to such lazy hands... which is why I'm here, my love." 42 looks up; his eyes shining bright with happiness as he hears the words.
Craig eyes the master warily, what is he trying to do here? What is he going to say? Seeing 42's affection only reminds him what is at stake. He knew what he was getting into; but rape? He's in shock; the realization hasn't set in, and he doubts it will until they're far away from here.
"You know I love you, pet..." Master says, brushing his cheek. 42 nods and clings to his legs. "And I know you're not good, you're practically worthless." Craig opens his mouth to fight back but watches the blonde nod.
"I'm sorry, I'm trying... I don't want to be a burden anymore."
"You're a burden out there. You're worth nothing anymore. No one wants you. 43's master has offered money for you but you will be of no use to him. You realize that, right? It's your choice but if you stay with me, I want to marry you.'
Craig's eyes widen as he hears the words. He's on to them; that's the only explanation. Or at the very least he expects something.
"I..." 42 glances at Craig, then to Master. He sees the gentle smile on his face and relaxes.
"Don't decide now," he pauses and then looks at the raven, "your master is on the way. Then you will decide."
Cartman was on the way? Tonight? They had set the plan for tomorrow. But this whole night had been a wreck from the get-go. And as far as he could tell they both needed to get out; now.
"I will come back down to get you when he is here. Please choose wisely."
They are left together in the dark. 42 holds his toe in his hands.
"Your husband wouldn't have done that, or raped you with a pole in one night. He would hug you, tell you you're good. He'd tell you you're beautiful and the most incredible person in the world."
"But I'm not, that would be a lie. Master doesn't lie." Craig sighs heavily.
"Kenny, you are the most amazing person I've ever known," he answers with a gentle smile. He sees the confused and shocked look on his face and can' t help but feel a little happy.
"I don't know how... I'm nothing," is the response he receives. This causes Craig to laugh.
"Actually, the answer to life, the universe, and everything is 42."
His eyes shine with tears and he feels his hand take Craig's in his. Craig's body is beginning to ache now. The adrenaline was beginning to wear off.
"Is my name really Kenny?" he whispers as if he were swearing for the first time. "Do you... do you really know me?"
"I thought you said I was lying."
"I..." he trails off, unable to finish his sentence. Two people in the same night using the same name on him didn't seem logical. He didn't understand how both Craig and the pizza man could lie to him, especially when the pizza man didn't have any reason to. "I don't know who to believe."
"The thing is..." Craig trails off, "that's your choice. You are free to choose. This is your life and you are in complete control. Just know that my... master's... offer still stands. I promise that you'll be free by morning."
42 whimpers and looks down at his toe in his hands. His eyes then settle on Craig, who is visibly shaking and quickly losing composure. They did this to him... to both of them... were they bad? Was it their fault? He didn't see Craig do anything wrong, and he... he shakes his head. He can't let himself believe Craig. He can't die like 40.
All he has ever wanted was freedom. But as he touches his stomach, he realizes he'll never have it. These scars and brands will make him forever bound. He has no way out; only in death. He wants his way out; he wants to be free.
And that's not the freedom Craig or his master could give him.
Only Master could.