"-not what he needs right now, are you fucking kidding me?!"
"Why do you suddenly give a shit? Yesterday Kenny didn't even exist to you. Fuck off, Jew."
"It's not my fault; we all believed he ran away!"
"Guys!" Butters hisses, peeking his head from the hospital room. "Shut up!" He glares at Kyle and Eric, who are six inches from ripping each other to pieces.
Tension has been thick all night. Add the fact that they are all now deprived of sleep and there is a hot mess in the hospital.
The news stations aired Stan's quick broadcast; he sent them to stations nationwide. The article and documents were sent to major newspapers worldwide, as well as the local ones in Colorado. It was all they were seeing on the television; they were avoiding looking at the screen on the wall. Their identities were preserved to spare any retaliation. However due to the extensive time and proof they released they were all receiving money and were contacted by the White House.
Which is what Kyle and Cartman are arguing about now.
Butters sighs and closes the door. He turns and smiles weakly at Craig, who is still half out of it but trying his best to pay attention to him.
"So... so we got him out?" Butters nods. The raven-haired man tries to smile but he can't bring himself to. It just seems too difficult.
"Craig... I'm so sorry," he replies; he's unsure of what to say. The man in front of him had been raped to be nothing more than an example. A scare tactic.
The doctor told them he doesn't have too much damage. They are still running tests to make sure he didn't contract any diseases.
What could be said to Craig? That he's proud of him? That he did a good job?
He can't imagine what he's thinking right now. What he's feeling. He appears empty, haunted.
"It's... it's nothing," is Craig's reply. "Where is he? Did they fix his toe?"
He knows what he's trying to do; he can't focus on what happened to him. Otherwise it will consume him. Instead he's trying to occupy his mind with everything else. Considering there is a lot that Craig doesn't know that distraction isn't going to be so difficult.
"He's stable, he hasn't woken up yet. They had to do a blood transfusion and emergency surgery to stop the bleeding. A lot of hemorrhaging and tears... but they actually did sew his toe back on. They're giving him pain killers; it's going to be difficult to deal with, the pain I mean. How are you holding up?"
"Could be worse," Craig replies weakly. Butters nods; he can tell he's in a lot of pain. He says nothing, just smiles weakly and stares out the door. Kyle is pacing now; Cartman is smirking.
"I don't get how they can just be... normal." The black-haired man shrugs, "after what happened... I mean, you realize what you did? An entire trafficking ring was shut down. You found Kenny, and you got him out of there. But there they are acting as if nothing ever happened."
"It's what you gotta do. Otherwise there's no way you're going to be able to get over it. Can... can we go see him?" Butters shook his head.
"Not yet. No one is allowed up there. He's being monitored and we can't disturb that for another two days." Craig shakes his head.
Butters doesn't get it either; the last thing Kenny needs right now is to be isolated. He needs to be around people, especially people who genuinely love him. The doctors are worried he is a suicide risk. They want to evaluate his mental state so they know what they're dealing with. So far the words "Post Traumatic Stress Disorder" have been thrown around as if they are nothing.
But Kenny has no mental state. He has to completely rebuild. Maybe by then he will be able to remember who he is. Butters just has a feeling that kind of mental trauma will take far longer to escape from; he hopes some day he will remember. Kenny will never be back to normal; and it will take a long time for him to have any semblance of normalcy.
It was going to be worth it though. It has to be.
"What about the others?" Craig asks, then grunts in pain as he turns on his side. Butters smiles.
"They found 72 missing people in three hours." Craig closes his eyes and trembles on the bed.
"So it was worth it..." he trails off. The blonde tilts his head.
"What was?"
"Going in... I was just... I was raped. Once. Those seventy two people? They lived through it every day, and at least ten times a day. What I went through means nothing. It hurts... but I should be-"
"God dammit, Craig..." Butters interrupts. "Listen to me. Your rape was not worth it. What you went through is just as traumatic, if not worse. It wasn't what you were used to, as insensitive as that may sound. You were a casualty, one that shouldn't have happened. They used you as an example to try to scare us. They shouldn't have done that. Don't try to convince yourself that you should be grateful, or that it isn't as bad. It is. You're a victim in this, just as much as they-"
"But I don't want to be a victim!" He yells, "I'm an investigator, a private fucking investigator. I took six years of judo and mixed martial arts, I can protect myself. I'm not a victim. I won't be." Butters nods and knows Craig is about to break down. He isn't going to cry but he is so wrecked, in every aspect, that his nerves are running thin. He doesn't want to push him.
"I'm sorry," Butters resigns, "I didn't mean to make it sound like... I'm proud of you, you know? For going in there, for doing what you did, and making Kenny feel safe. I couldn't have done that."
"But you did," is the reply he receives.
"That's not what I meant and you know it." Craig just sighs and stares out the window. He feels like their conversation is done for now; he can't push Craig. Too much happened.
The door opens and Kyle sits in the chair across from Butters.
"Can you go talk some sense into him?" Kyle asks; Butters gawks in response. There is no way he and Cartman can be in the same room together; last night doesn't count. They haven't spoken in eight months. "He wants Kenny to go with us to DC, use him for popularity."
"That's... that's just like..." The redhead just gives him a look and shakes his head. Craig huffs in annoyance and presses the button on his morphine drip. He doesn't want to deal with them anymore.
Butters hesitantly stands up and walks out of the room. Cartman is looking at his phone as if he is waiting for an important message or call. The blonde clears his throat, then folds his arms over his chest. This is going to be awkward.
Except it isn't. Because everything Butters thought about Cartman is wrong; just like what they all thought of Kenny. They broke up because Cartman was protecting him. All he knew eight months ago was that Eric said he didn't want him in his life. He was trying to save him from being involved at all. Except here he is, standing in front of Cartman with his arms folded over his chest and a quietly amused smirk on his face.
"So... you want Kenny to go to DC with us?"
"That fucking Jew is wrong, you honestly think I'm thinking about me right now? Do you not remember who's on the third floor?"
And then he realizes what Eric is getting at. His reason is surprisingly unselfish, considering who he is.
They are all being honored for their bravery; even Kyle and Stan. All of them are to receive awards and their moment of fame for decimating a huge human trafficking ring. Their work didn't just stop in America; there are busts occurring all over Eastern Europe right at this very moment.
So if they are being honored for their bravery, why isn't Kenny? Why doesn't he get something for his suffering, for being a victim in a world he was forced into? Everyone who suffered just like him should be up there with them, instead of them, and have their time to speak and be heard. Why can't Kenny share his side of the story? He and the victims who were freed with him, or are still living in their hell, won't be cheered. They won't be seen for their bravery; they should have done something. They should have fought back; they had a choice. They are nothing but whores.
Despite having their freedom, they don't have a voice. They are going to live in a world where their damage is ignored and judged; there is no sympathy for them.
"He won't be well enough to..." he trails off. Personally, he finds himself agreeing with Eric. Why couldn't Kyle see what he was getting at?
"He should. He deserves it more than us. He should get all that stuff, not us." Butters scoffs and stares at him in surprise. "What?"
"You're saying no to money?" As wrong as it is, Butters was a little excited about the cash. He can now have heat in his apartment. He can pay off some of his loans. But taking that money doesn't seem right; it seems like they're using the people just as much as the pimps had.
But Butters is surprised to hear Cartman say no to that cash. He would have thought he would be rejoicing and trying to swim in it by now. Instead, Cartman just looks solemn.
"It doesn't feel right. And we should be able to see him." Butters nods.
Keeping Kenny away from them, from people other than white coats and authorities, seems like a terrible idea. He isn't in a proper frame of mind. He doesn't trust them; for all he knows they could hurt him.
At least Butters imagines that's what he would think. He isn't quite sure. He probably isn't even awake.
Footfalls sound on the sterile floor. Butters and Cartman look up to find Stan and Wendy talking quietly to one another. They are engrossed in their own conversation; they both look ready to pass out from exhaustion. Stan sighs and smiles weakly at them.
"How's Craig?"
"The same as before..." Stan nods and rubs the back of his neck. Wendy steps forward and looks at Butters, then Eric. "And Kenny?"
It sounds weird. It feels weird. Kenny is back in their lives. They rescued him. And now he's in the hospital... he's back. Nothing feels real right now; Butters half expects to wake up from a dream in his frozen apartment with his economics textbook as his pillow. But this is real; he's wide awake.
"His large intestine was severed along with the um... the hemorrhaging. They did a bowel resection and drained the blood. They're... they're going to let Clyde be his nurse. How... how did you find him? I don't understand."
"Does he have to have a colostomy bag?" Wendy rolls her eyes at Cartman's question. The look on his face indicates it was meant to be a joke. "I had a prostitution case about ten months ago. I thought I saw him, so... this is where it led me." She nods and smiles a little. "Do we really have to wait three days to see him?" Wendy sighs.
"Yes, he needs a proper evaluation. He'll be fine. Clyde will be with him."
"But it's his birthday..." Butters trails off; Wendy just looks worn down. She and Stan have both probably been deflecting media and trying to figure out what to do next. Or if there is anything left to do.
He just doesn't feel like it's fair to have Kenny be on his own. That seems like the worst idea, actually. How can he be properly evaluated in isolation? And what is going to happen if he fails? Are they going to put him in a long-term facility? That's the last thing he needs.
Butters knows that Kenny will find his way out either way. Whether or not he's in his right mind he will slip through the cracks. With the mind of a slave he won't want to be a burden; too many others need the care. He isn't worth it. It doesn't matter if he makes it or not. With his right mind? He doesn't need the help. He'll be fine on his own, thanks.
"What's the verdict with Craig?" Stan asks, "I mean, they're not just..."
"He said he doesn't want counseling or therapy. The only reason he's still here is because he was shot..." Butters trails off, "he needs help."
"He's Craig," Cartman mumbles, "he's not going to ask for it. We'll probably never see him again." The blonde doesn't believe that for a second; he'll be around still. After all, Kenny and Craig had been friends. He's going to want to stick close and make sure he's okay.
They stand in silence, staring down the hallway. Wendy finally straightens up, nudges Stan, and murmurs that she wants to see Craig. If he's awake she wants to talk to him. He smiles, catches Butters eye, then glances at Eric. He rolls his eyes in response and leans on the wall.
"So what are your plans after this all blows over?"
"I'm gonna try to join the force again." Butters nods, "you?"
"Just... go back to normal, I guess..." he replies with a shrug. What else can he do? He needs the pizza delivery job until he graduates. And even then finding a job will be difficult; especially since he has virtually no experience working in a business office. "Is this... was this case the reason you... pushed me away?"
"I didn't want you hurt."
Butters sighs heavily and runs a hand through his hair. He swallows back the nervousness in his stomach and finally looks up at Cartman.
"Well, I got involved anyway... you planned it, didn't you?" Eric nods hesitantly. "So no matter what... I was still just a pawn in the game, right? You always meant to have me involved. I just couldn't get in your way."
"That's not... God damn it, Butters. I didn't think you'd actually go with last night. I didn't want you fucking dying. Jesus... you had a right to know. I let you in. I just didn't think it would end up this way."
"Everything got fucked up, didn't it?" Cartman sighs heavily and folds his arms.
"Yeah. It did."
They're silent, mulling over the words spoken between them. Then, Butters cracks a soft smile.
"Can you imagine what Kenny would think if he knew we dated?" Eric stares at him for a brief moment before he busts out in near-hysterical laughter. The blonde can't help but chuckle along with him. It's kind of nice, really. It seems as if the tension between them dissipated with their laughter.
"He would probably be horrified," Cartman replies with an amused smirk on his face.
"That or he'd say, 'I knew it!'" They both smile at their imaginations.
"Probably both," Butters nods and sighs as he stares down the hallway. It's quiet. And he can't help but think this isn't so bad. He figures he even owes Eric a bit of an apology, or at least a "thank you". But he knows he doesn't need to say it. Cartman won't want to hear it. Not for this.
"Probably."
Their laughter dies and Butters sighs softly. He isn't sure what is left to be said or done, if anything. He feels like saying anything else would be pointless.
Cartman clears his throat and pulls out a cigarette. He nods to Butters, then walks away.
"Hey, Eric?" Butters calls; he isn't too far away, his voice barely carries. The brunette man turns around with a slightly annoyed expression on his face. "I think... I think he'd be happy for us."
His features soften and he appears contemplative for a brief moment in time. Then the man ahead of him lets out a sad, quiet laugh and grimaces slightly.
"Yeah..." he mumbles, then turns around. "I'm sure he would've been."
At that Eric disappears, leaving Butters on his own in the hallway. He stares at where Eric had just been. His smile fades as his eyes settle on Craig's room. His family is in there, as are Kyle, Stan, and Wendy. There are simply too many people. He isn't needed there.
Slowly he glances up at the ceiling; a sinking feeling settles in his chest.
Kenny's alone.
At this thought, he walks away from Craig's room. He stops at the elevator and sighs heavily as he hesitates to press the button. Up would take him to Kenny, down would take him home. He isn't sure what to do.
Thankfully, he isn't the one to make the decision. A man reaches over his and presses the "up" arrow, then boards the elevator. Butters follows suit and wraps his arms around himself as he approaches the third floor.