I was gonna tack on one more scene to this one, but after re-reading it I decided no, I like it ending just where it is. :)

THANK YOU as always for the feedback and I see I have new readers - welcome to all of you! I am very grateful for all of your comments! By the way, just a small clarification because it was brought up in comments to me - Snow and Charming are NOT Emma's parents in this fic. It just didn't work in this verse.

I do not own 'Once Upon a Time.'

Chapter 12

Belle spent the night in Gold's room once again; Gold had to work the next morning so they set an alarm. They both got up at 6:30 and Belle went downstairs to prepare breakfast for the two of them. She prepared his usual Monday fare, and they sat down and enjoyed their meal together. "So what are you doing today?" Belle asked.

"I um – can't tell you those things. Spy stuff, you know." Gold said.

"Right. It's okay – I understand that." Belle replied. "You'll be busy all day then?"

"Till at least six. We can have lunch though – Miss Swan always goes out to get her lunch." Gold replied.

"How long have you been working with Emma?" Belle asked.

"Eight years on and off. I trained her and she is a surveillance specialist as I am. The past two years we've been on the same case together, and since all of the equipment is here it's easier for her to come here and work." Gold said.

"Well, that's nice for you. To have her company, I mean." Belle said.

"She's a good agent – but then again, she – she had a good mentor." Gold said, just as Emma barged into the dining room.

"Are you about done with your breakfast date here? We have things to work on." Emma said.

"Well, good morning to you too, Miss Swan." Gold said. He and Belle both stood up, having finished their breakfast. Gold walked over to Belle and planted a kiss on her cheek. "I'll be down for lunch. Miss Swan will do the shopping today – get a list together for her, love."

"I will?" Emma asked.

"Well, unless you have someone else in mind that can go into town. Because Belle isn't going out there." Gold said.

"Fine, whatever." Emma said.

"Emma – can I – talk to you for a moment?" Belle asked.

"I'll be upstairs." Gold said, and he left the room.

"If you want to talk to me about whatever the hell is going on with you and Gold, I'm really not -" Emma began, and Belle interrupted her.

"I know all of this is probably a surprise to you but -"

"Oh, that's an understatement." Emma said.

"I also know that Ian has – issues, but -" Belle began.

"Issues? Oh, he has WAY more than issues, you probably don't even know the half of it." Emma said.

"He's getting better." Belle said. "He didn't have any of his regular Sunday meals yesterday, and we even slept in till ten."

"Don't need to know your sleeping habits, I already saw more than I needed to. Besides – you're only gonna be here a few more days. There's nothing I can do about that." Emma said.

"That's why I wanted to talk to you." Belle said. "I, um – I was wondering if – when you go out today, you could – pick us up some – um – well, I'm not on the pill or anything and I don't think Ian has anything here so -"

"You want me to buy you CONDOMS?" Emma asked, a disgusted look coming over her face. "So wait a minute – you guys haven't -"

"Not yet, no. But – after I leave, I don't know when I'll see him again, and I just wanted us to – really be together." Belle said. Emma began to pace.

"No. No way. No way in hell am I buying that for you." Emma said.

"I'll give you the money." Belle said.

"It's not about the money – you don't know what you're getting yourself into here with him. Come on, the guy has been a recluse for twenty years, isn't that a red flag?" Emma asked.

"I know about his son dying." Belle said. "He's just had a hard time coping, that's all."

"Okay, I get it now, you've got the Florence Nightingale complex – you're one of these girls that likes to fix people, aren't you? Well let me tell you something – that guy CANNOT be fixed." Emma said.

"I already told you he's getting better. We had a lovely day yesterday." Belle said.

"One day. You had ONE DAY." Emma told her. "I've seen him have good days too, so don't think you're special. But I've also seen him at his worst. And that's not a pretty sight."

"I've seen him drunk. I've seen him – lose his temper." Belle said.

"You think THAT'S his worst? Honey, that's not even close to his worst, that was just the pre-game show." Emma said. "You may think you know him, but you don't."

"I know his heart. I know he loves me." Belle said.

"That's not always enough." Emma said.

Belle spent the day cleaning Gold's office, since she didn't do so the day before. Even though he said she no longer had to clean, Belle needed something to occupy her time. After she finished, she went into the living room to read for a bit. She was almost through with her book when Gold came downstairs. "There's my girl." Gold said, and Belle stood up and gave him a hug. Gold then kissed her on the lips. "Miss me?" he asked. Emma stood in the doorway watching in disbelief.

"Yes. I did." Belle replied. "I have our lunch ready, it's just warming in the oven. Emma I have that list for you, too."

"How about I go get our lunch set up and you go over things with Miss Swan?" Gold asked. He gave her another quick kiss on the cheek and left the room.

"I have the list right here." Belle said, and she picked up a piece of paper off the coffee table and handed it to Emma. "I um – I understand your concerns about Ian and I, but – will you please reconsider getting what I asked for?"

"It's a BAD idea." Emma said.

"Didn't you just see him? What he was like just now?" Belle asked.

"Yeah, I saw him. He's been like that all morning too – all nice, and polite, and not yelling – it's weird." Emma said. "And okay, maybe you're having a good effect on him. But I'm not getting you what you asked for."

"Excuse me, Miss Swan – did I just hear you turn down a request for something Belle wants?" Gold asked. He entered the room, went to Belle's side, and put his arm around her. "Miss Swan, whatever Belle wishes to have – she shall have." Gold gave Belle a kiss on the cheek. "Lunch is all set at the table, sweetheart."

"Yeah, she's not getting this." Emma said.

"Miss Swan – I believe that – well, that you owe me a favor, do you not?" Gold asked.

"You want to cash in your favor on this? Really?" Emma asked.

"As a matter of fact, yes I do." Gold said. "You get Belle whatever she likes."

"Alright then." Emma said, and she looked over at Belle. "So – what size?"

"Um – average, I suppose." Belle replied.

"Really? Huh. I'd have gone with small." Emma replied. "Just remember, Gold – this is your favor, right?"

"Yes." Gold replied.

"Okay. Be back in a bit." Emma said, and she left.

"You let me handle Emma, alright? She can be difficult. She's had a hard life." Gold said.

"She seems a lot like you. Closed off, brash, hiding her emotions – I think someone hurt her. Badly." Belle said.

"They did." Gold agreed. "But that's Emma's tale to tell, not mine." Gold said. "Come on – lunch is getting cold." With his left arm around her, Gold led Belle into the dining room.

That evening, Belle and Gold were cuddled in bed together. Gold had his pajama top off and was wearing only the bottoms. "So – that one right there, on your shoulder – what's that scar from?" Belle asked.

"Gunshot wound. That was in Germany – Munich, if I remember correctly." Gold said.

"How about these two, on your chest?" Belle asked.

"Knife. Russia – that one almost did me in, that second one there – inch away from my heart." Gold said. Belle reached over him and kissed each scar gently.

"How about the um – scar on your abdomen?" Belle asked.

"Oh, that one? Horribly traumatic. I um – I had to have my appendix taken out when I was fourteen. Missed two and a half weeks of school. Still haven't gotten over it." Gold said.

"I thought most fourteen year old boys would be thrilled to miss two and a half weeks of school." Belle said.

"Yes, well – I hated it. Didn't like having to catch up on what I missed. I was a bit of a bookworm." Gold said.

"I thought you said you weren't much of a reader." Belle said.

"Not for leisure, no, but – I was a very studious lad. Especially science, logic – I was fascinated by computers. To me they were – and are – the closest thing to magic we have in this world." Gold said. Belle began to laugh. "What?" Gold asked.

"You were a nerd." Belle said.

"Well what's wrong with that?" Gold asked.

"Nothing, just – you don't seem to be the nerdy type. I mean – you have a tattoo on your shoulder. Since when do nerds get tattoos?"

"They do when you're out on the town with your mates at age eighteen in London and you're dared to get one." Gold said. Belle glanced at the tattoo on his shoulder.

"Why a lizard?" Belle asked.

"Why not?" Gold replied. "It was – interesting. Plus it was on the first page of designs and I just wanted to get it over with before my alcohol buzz wore off and I could actually feel them doing it. I have one on my right ankle too."

"Ooooh, I want to see that one." Belle said, and she moved toward his leg, but Gold stopped her.

"Belle, please. Don't." Gold said.

"Ian, I – I'm going to have to see it eventually." Belle said.

"I just – I'm not ready for that yet. Okay?" Gold asked.

"Okay." Belle said, and she gave him a quick kiss. "Do you want to tell me how it happened?"

"I – I'd rather not. Not right now." Gold said.

"Alright. You'll tell me when you're ready." Belle said. "So – do you want to hear my battle scar stories?"

"You have battle scars?" Gold asked.

"Well, I don't have tales that are as intriguing as yours, but – I have a couple." Belle said. She pulled back her pant leg and showed Gold the back of her left knee; there was a scar about four inches long there.

"What happened there?" Gold asked as he sat up to look.

"I was nine years old and I got caught in the middle of an argument between my bicycle and a gravel road. I, unfortunately, was the one who lost the argument. I lost control and fell and one of the spokes in my back wheel got knocked loose and pretty much tore my skin off back there."

"Ouch." Gold said, making a face.

"Sixteen stitches; I screamed bloody murder for nearly an hour straight, I'm surprised you didn't hear me in the states." Belle said.

"Oh, that's what that noise was then." Gold teased as he reached down and kissed her scar. "Any others?"

"Right here." Belle said, and she pointed to her right temple. Gold examined it closely.

"Where?" he asked.

"By the eyebrow. It's hard to see, you've got to get in the right light, it actually cuts through my brow." Belle said. Gold looked closer.

"Oh, there it is. That little thing?" Gold asked, and he gave her a kiss on top of the scar.

"Yeah, that little thing was even more traumatic than the bicycle incident. I was fifteen and had just moved to New York from Australia. I was new in school and I was doing my best to make friends but I had this odd accent that everyone made fun of and I was always reading and they teased me about that too. Anyway, there was this boy in school that I just had such a crush on but I couldn't get him to notice me not matter what I did." Belle said.

"Are you sure he could see?" Gold joked. Belle laughed a bit.

"I hadn't quite - filled out yet, and my hair was a shorter. I was shorter – my second year of high school and I still looked like an elementary student. I was a bit of a late bloomer. So I was determined to get him to notice me. They had this dance at the school, and my papa told me I could have any dress I wanted, so I found this beautiful pink dress and this lovely pair of pink shoes to match. Of course, I hadn't really worn heels much before, and these were three-inch heels which I foolishly thought I could handle fine. Anyhow – I got to the dance, and when I opened the door to go in I lost my balance and fell face-first right into the door and cut my temple right at my eyebrow. Blood splattered everywhere - on the door, on the ground, and on my pretty pink dress." Belle said.

"Well, did he notice you?" Gold teased.

"Oh, everyone noticed me. The entire school started calling me the 'clumsy kangaroo' or the 'wobbly wallaby'. They even made note of it in the yearbook. And I ended up with four stiches on that one, plus a black eye that took over a week to go away." Belle said.

"Weren't you modeling shortly after that?" Gold asked.

"I was. Had a growth spurt that summer – finally. And all of a sudden all of these boys that did nothing but either laugh at me or ignore me decided I was interesting, which made me happy until I went out with them and found out that none of them had a brain in their head; in most cases, if they had one at all, it was located - elsewhere. Idiots, the entire lot of them. Immature, boorish, brainless twats." Belle said.

"Maybe that's why you like older men, then." Gold said.

"Well, I don't like stupid men – and you're definitely not that." Belle said. "Age doesn't really matter to me. I told you – I just see you." Belle climbed on top of him and started to kiss him hard on the lips, then began to kiss him up and down his chest. Gold trembled at the touch of her lips against his skin. "I want to be with you, Ian. I mean – really BE with you." Belle said. Gold pushed her away and sat up. "That is where all of this has been leading to, right?"

"Um – Belle, I haven't -"

"Ian, I know you've been in this house for twenty years, but it's not like it's something you forget how to do." Belle said. "I mean, you – you still CAN, right?"

"Of course I can. I just – Belle, you have to leave soon. I thought that – maybe it would be best if we – waited." Gold said.

"Ian, it could be months before we see each other again. I don't want to wait." Belle said. "I had Emma get us something." Belle reached into the drawer and pulled out a box of condoms.

"Oh, good god, THAT was what you asked her to get?" Gold asked, his eyes widening. "I used my favor on – THAT!? Emma! Good god, you asked EMMA for -"

"Ian, calm down." Belle said, rubbing his shoulders. "You've never called her Emma before, it's always Miss Swan. You do that a lot, don't you? Refuse to use names other than formal names. Why is that?" Belle asked.

"Because names – imply familiarity. Names give you power. And if you use someone's first name – they have power over you!" Gold shouted at her.

"So – you've given me power over you then?" Belle asked.

"Reciprocally." Gold replied. "Oh god – Emma bought these. Belle – I can't – I mean -"

"Ian, it's not like she doesn't know what's happening between us, she's an adult." Belle said.

"She's my daughter! Emma – is the girl in the pictures, Belle! She's my daughter!" Gold screamed. He got up out of bed, put on his pajama top, which was lying at the foot of the bed, grabbed his cane, and moved as quickly as he could toward the study, and Belle followed.

"Ian, please – I'm sorry, I didn't know." Belle said, almost crying. "Please don't drink, Ian."

"I'm not drinking." Gold said, and he made his way to his spinning wheel and sat down. He started to work at it, staring at it intently. Belle moved to stand behind him, and put her hands on his shoulders.

"Does it help? Spinning?" Belle asked.

"Helps me to calm down so I don't get – upset." Gold replied, still focused on the wheel.

"I'm sorry I upset you. I'm sorry." Belle said.

"You didn't know." Gold said. "It's alright."

"Does Emma know? About you? About her – connection with you?" Belle asked.

"Yeah. She knows." Gold replied, still not looking at her. "I got drunk one day and – Emma was there. Apparently I – told her things. Same way I told you things."

"You do tend to, um – reveal quite a bit when you're drinking." Belle said. "How did she take it?"

"Not well at first." Gold said. "I killed her parents, Belle. They – they were Russian spies. They had set up a whole life in the states, had been preparing for it since childhood apparently. They even had a child of their own – which no one knew until – well after. I found her in her bedroom, crying. Poor thing was terrified, I still don't know what she saw, if anything, nor does she. She was barely three years old so hopefully that is a memory that will be forever buried."

"Does she remember living with you?" Belle asked.

"No. She doesn't." Gold said. He stopped spinning and leaned back against Belle.

"You alright?" Belle asked, running her fingers through his hair. Gold nodded.

"Let's go back to bed." he said quietly. Gold stood up, and Belle took his hand as they walked back to the bedroom together and climbed back into bed. Belle quickly grabbed the box of condoms and tossed them back into the nightstand drawer. She snuggled into Gold's arms. "Belle, it's not that I don't want you. I do want you – more than you can even imagine. But – if we – and then you leave – I don't think I could handle that."

"I don't want to leave, Ian. Please don't make me leave." Belle said, and she started to cry. Gold kissed the top of her head.

"Belle, if there were any other way -"

"Come with me. You can come with me, you – you can be my protector." Belle said.

"No – I can't. They've connected you with me; the worst possible thing for us right now is to be together. It puts both of us in danger." Gold said. Belle looked up at him. "Sweetheart – when all of this is resolved, and I promise you, it WILL be resolved – we'll be together. And it will be magic."

"Okay." Belle said. She lay quietly in his arms for several minutes.

"By the way – average?" Gold asked.

"It was a guess – was I wrong?" Belle asked. Gold smiled a bit.

"Sweetheart, I might not have been graced with the gift of height but – I make up for it in other ways." Gold said. Belle sat up a bit.

"Really?" she asked.

"Something for you to look forward to." Gold told her. Belle leaned over him and kissed him.

"I can hardly wait." she replied.

The next morning, Gold and Belle enjoyed an early breakfast in bed. Since this was the day on which his meals were delivered, Gold ordered an extra meal for Belle. After breakfast, they each separately got ready for the day, and then Belle came back upstairs to meet Gold in the study. He was at his spinning wheel when she entered the room.

"You really like that, don't you? Spinning, I mean." Belle said.

"My, um – my mother taught me. Or she started to, I was just a wee lad. After she was gone, I kept at it. It was a way to – forget. And remember. At the same time." Gold said. "It helps me to – keep calm when the need arises."

"So why don't you do that instead of throwing things all over the room?" Belle asked. "Like you did last night."

"Because sometimes – I just can't control the beast." Gold said. Belle kissed him on the cheek.

"You're not a beast. Come on – you have a bit of time before you have to start work, right?" Belle asked.

"A bit, yes." Gold said.

"Well – let's take advantage of that, then." Belle said. She took his hand and led him over to the sofa. She climbed onto his lap and faced him, then kissed him on the lips.

"You don't mind doing this, do you?" Belle asked.

"Don't mind at all." Gold said. They kissed for several minutes, and were interrupted by Emma entering the room through the hidden door.

"What, didn't have enough fun last night?" Emma asked. Gold immediately pulled away from Belle and turned a bit red.

"Emma, I'm – I'm sorry, I didn't know your relationship to him, I never would have asked you if I had." Belle said.

"What relationship? He's the jerk that I work with because no one else will put up with him." Emma said. Gold looked down sadly when she said that. "Everything's all set, by the way. We're leaving tomorrow."

"Tomorrow? That soon?" Belle asked.

"Where is she going?" Gold asked.

"Robin and Marian will take her in. You know anything about babies?" Emma asked Belle.

"Um – no, not really, why?" Belle asked.

"This is a friend of mine from my early days in training and his wife; she's eight months pregnant and they were looking for an au pair, and said if you could do that until all of this – ends – you can stay with them." Emma said.

"Um – alright – I guess I can learn that. Where do they live?" Belle asked, standing up. Gold stood up after her.

"Couldn't you find somewhere closer?" Gold asked.

"For what, so that she could sneak out the window at night to come over here?" Emma snapped.

"Where am I going?" Belle asked.

"England." Gold said. "A dumpy little village called Nottingham."

"Hey, you haven't been there in over twenty years – it's not like it used to be." Emma said. Gold walked over to the fireplace mantle and began to finger one of the knick knacks sitting on it. Belle could see that he was angry, and she walked up behind him.

"Ian – I know what you're thinking about doing, but please don't. I know you're upset but you don't need to do that." Belle said calmly, and she wrapped her arms around him from behind.

"I don't want you to be that far away from me." Gold whispered, setting the item back down on the mantle.

"Is there a way we can keep in touch?" Belle asked.

"No." he replied. Gold turned to face her, and pulled Belle into a hug. "I need to discuss some things with Miss Swan – do you mind going downstairs for a bit?"

"Okay." Belle said. She looked up at Gold and touched his cheek. "We'll get through this." Gold stared at Belle sadly as she walked out of the room.

"Didn't I tell you weeks ago what a really bad idea it would be if you and her -" Emma began.

"Yes you did, Miss Swan, you really don't need to remind me of that." Gold said.

"I don't need you distracted. And if you give as much of a crap about me as you claim to -"

"I do." Gold said.

"Then stop mooning over that librarian and help me get my son back!" Emma screamed at him.