Eighteen

On a frigid evening in early February, Richard Castle busied himself in his apartment's kitchen crafting his latest culinary masterpiece. In the tight space with both the stovetop and oven running, it was very warm, but when he walked out to the open apartment area to set a bowl of salad on the table, he shivered immediately. Damn. How did it get so cold in the apartment? He hadn't changed the heat setting in weeks and Alexis knew better than to touch the dial.

Oh well, he thought mischievously as he returned to the kitchen. Kate would be there soon and they would have the whole evening to warm each other up. In multiple ways, he hazarded to guess, especially since they hadn't seen each other in four days.

As she was in need of a well-deserved break and had a few vacation days to use, Kate had decided to take a long weekend to spend some time with her father at their Pennsylvania cabin. Though he teased her for seeking out an even snowier climate during the peak of winter, Castle fully supported her decision to go and promised to hold down the fort while she was gone.

Due to the fact that cell reception was spotty at best in the mountains, they hadn't spoken very often during her time away. Castle had managed to send her a message to invite her to dinner on the evening of her return and she agreed. On her way back she texted to say they hit traffic and she might end up being a little late, but he expected her at any moment.

Just as he was pulling their main course from the oven, he heard the knock at their apartment door. He called out for his daughter to get it. A minute later, his partner entered the kitchen looking as lovely as ever. Her hair was swept back from her face in a ponytail clearly revealing her eyes, clear and bright and reflecting the emerald hues in her sweater. The dark circles that usually lined them were gone and, if he was not mistaken, her cheeks even appeared rosy. Though, honestly, that was probably due to the bitter cold outside.

"Hello," he greeted her warmly. "How was your trip?"

"It was good…long," she added with a slight laugh.

He blinked at her. "It was only four days."

"Yeah but four days of my dad and me…just the two of us…in an isolated cabin…"

"Ah," he nodded. "Say no more."

"I mean, I know I grew up with the man, but the older I get, I swear I don't know how I stood it. I mean, I love him but-"

"No, no I totally get it," he promised her. "Trust me, if my mother and I were alone in a cabin for more than two days it would probably turn into The Hunger Games and only one of us would survive."

Kate laughed and reached over, skimming her fingertips down his arms. "I guess I, ah, kinda missed you."

"Me? Well, I guess I kinda missed you too," he echoed with a chuckle. Then, he reached out a hand, hooked it around her waist and pulled her in for a quick kiss. Then he kissed her again. And again until, just a few seconds later, he'd backed her up against the refrigerator, their lips firmly intertwined. Both of them had completely forgotten they were not alone in the apartment until they heard a deliberate throat clearing behind them.

Both Kate and Castle jumped apart. Red faced, they looked at the young girl standing with her hands clasped behind her back. "I just wanted to get a drink," she explained simply.

"Ri-right. Right. Sorry, Alexis," Castle said, taking a step back. As Kate appeared rather frozen, he reached out to grab the arm of her sweater and pull her away from the fridge. Alexis reached inside, pulled out a bottle of juice, and then turned to leave the kitchen but not before shooting the adults a skeptical look.

When the younger girl was gone, Kate let out the breath she'd been holding in. Covering her face with her hands, she leaned back against the counter and moaned. "Oh god, oh god, I'm so sorry."

"It's not your fault," Castle told her with a mildly amused smile. She was completely freaking out and it was very entertaining.

"But she saw us!" Kate squeaked out. "How bad is this? Bad right? Really bad?"

"Well, let's see." He rested one hand against the counter and placed the other at his hip. "She found us kissing…fully clothed in the middle of the kitchen… Yeah this is about a two on a scale of one-to-ten."

Kate blinked at him, disagreement plain on her face. "But she saw us kissing."

"Relax, Kate," he said, stroking her arm. "She's not going to write a report about it an email it to Montgomery. She was probably more annoyed we were blocking the fridge to be honest." Noticing his partner still looked rather shell shocked, he kissed her forehead. "It's fine. Just go sit down; dinner will be ready in a second."

With great reluctance, Kate shuffled her way out to the main area of the apartment. She found Alexis already seated at the table. When the girl looked up at her, Kate felt her ears grow hot. Damn her inability to suppress this kind of embarrassment! All she needed to do was play it cool and casual. Right. That was easier said than done.

"So, Alexis, how's school?"

The younger girl shrugged. "Okay, I guess. Nothing interesting. We're going on a field trip this week."

"Oh really?" Kate asked. "Where to?"

"Just a museum."

"That sounds nice."

Alexis scrunched her nose in displeasure. "It's an art museum. I don't really like art. I'd rather go to a history museum and read all the stories about the past."

Kate smiled at the girl; she really was her father's daughter.

As dinner progressed the awkwardness in the trio dissipated easily. Soon they were laughing about various things and talking about upcoming plans. "Dad," Alexis began as their meal came to a close, "can we go see the new Disney princess movie?"

Castle pursed his lips together. "Really, Alexis? You're not too old for those?" Truthfully, he didn't care. He had been known to shed a tear or two at the end of an animated film before (damn that Toy Story 3), and playing spot-the-adult-humor throughout the film was always a fun game. Castle merely found her desire to go amusing. One minute she was thirteen and practically a grown adult who wanted to do adult things. The next, she wanted to see Disney movies and yelled at him when he suggested giving some of her stuffed animals away.

"Actually," Kate interjected, a shy smile across her face, "I kind of wanted to see that one, too."

While Alexis smiled proudly, Castle gaped at his partner. He had her pegged for having a much different taste in movies. "Really? You?"

She shrugged helplessly. "I kind of have a weak spot for Disney movies. They remind me of how-" She cut off her speech and lowered her eyes to the table. Nervously adjusting the silverware by her plate she said, "Of how I used to watch them with my mom."

Castle smiled softly to himself before turning his eyes towards his daughter. Fortunately, she didn't need any encouragement; the wheels of her brain were already turning.

"We should all go!" the girl suggested.

Kate's gaze snapped up and she raised one hand to protest. "Oh, no. I don't need to intrude on you spending time with your father and-"

"No, please," Castle insisted. "We'd love for you to join us. How about Saturday? A matinee?"

Kate arched her eyebrows at him. "Isn't that Valentine's Day?"

He tilted his head to look at her. Truthfully, he hadn't thought about the date, but she was correct; it was Valentine's Day. That certainly was convenient. "It is. What about it? Do you have other plans?"

She cleared her throat. "Ah, no. No. I just…"

"Please Kate—c'mon!" Alexis encouraged with her innocent smile and large doe eyes. Castle made a mental note to give her an extra helping of dessert the following night.

Kate's eyes shifted between Castle and his daughter for a moment before she finally agreed. "Yeah, okay; I'll come with you."

Much to Kate's surprise, the movie theater was packed at one p.m. on Valentine's Day afternoon. Not with couples as she would have expected, but with families and chattering children. Then again, she shouldn't have been surprised. The movie they were seeing had been at the top of the box office charts ever since its release the week of Christmas.

As the line for snacks was several dozen families deep, Castle suggested that they go find their seats then he would go out and get their popcorn. That way, Alexis didn't have to miss any of the previews. They found three seats together towards the center of a row at the top of the crowded theater. Castle left his coat on the seat between the two girls and then tip-toed his way out of the row, which was difficult given his large frame.

Kate pulled off her jacket, draped it across the back of her seat and pulled her cell phone from her pocket before sitting down. She made sure the device was on silent mode before slipping it back into her coat pocket. Just as she turned to make sure Alexis was situated, she realized the girl was now sitting beside her. Slightly startled, she jumped and clutched her hand to her chest.

"Is there something wrong with your seat, Alexis?"

The girl shook her head. "No it's not broken, I just wanted to sit here for a second."

Kate nodded and leaned back in her seat. After no more than a minute of silence she heard, "Are you my dad's girlfriend now?"

The words hit Kate's chest like a lightning bolt and she spluttered appropriately. "Wha-wha-what?"

"Are you my dad's girlfriend now?" Alexis repeated the question in a calm, enunciated way.

Kate cleared her throat and leaned forward in her seat. Great. Of course the girl had chosen that moment to ask her question. "Alexis, your father and I are partners; we work together."

The younger girl blinked at her. "I'm thirteen, not stupid. I saw you kiss. Plus, I hear you leaving early in the mornings and I know what that means."

Kate felt her cheeks grow hot. Alexis heard her leaving in the mornings? Shit! She always tried to be so quiet, too! When she looked over and saw a very persistent look on the red-head's face, her shoulders rounded. "Well, I…it's complicated, you see."

Alexis nodded and dropped her hands to her lap. "It's because I'm a deal breaker, isn't it?"

As the girl had mumbled, Kate wasn't sure she heard her correctly. "Excuse me?"

Alexis looked up at Kate, her eyes full of sadness. "It's because I'm a deal breaker, right? Because my dad has me. That's why you don't want to be his girlfriend."

Kate felt her throat tighten. What a terrible thought for Alexis to have in her mind! For Kate, it couldn't have been further from the truth. On the long list of reasons why she didn't want to be Castle's girlfriend, Alexis didn't even fall into the top ten. Heck, she wasn't on the list at all. Kate knew she had never showed any dislike or disinterest in the girl. If anything, it was the opposite. She always tried to be polite and attentive to her when they had dinner. They'd even gone skating together that one time. Thus, she deduced if Alexis had those thoughts in her mind they must have come from somewhere else.

"Alexis, has someone said that to you before?"

The girl shook her head. "Not to me, but I heard it."

Great, Kate thought; that almost made it worse. She reached out a hand and put it atop the girl's. "Alexis, look at me." Kate waited until she did before continuing. "If there is a woman out there who doesn't want to be with your father because of you then she doesn't deserve your father in the first place. The relationship your father and I have is complicated, but I promise you you're not the reason why."

Apparently satisfied with this, Alexis gave Kate a small smile before moving back to her seat. A few minutes later, Castle returned with popcorn, M&M's and drinks. He'd barely been seated thirty seconds before the theater lights dimmed and the previews began.

Throughout the film, Kate found herself struggling to pay attention as her thoughts remained mostly on Alexis and what she had said. For the most part, Kate argued back and forth with herself about whether or not to reveal their conversation to Castle. After she decided she had to tell him something, she wrestled with how much and in how much detail. Finally, she decided she would tell him what Alexis said, but keep it as simple as possible.

When they returned to Castle's apartment, Kate informed her partner that she needed to speak with him—alone. He sent Alexis inside and they remained in the hall while Kate briefed him on what his daughter had said. As soon as she repeated Alexis's "deal breaker" line she witnessed her partner's eyes cloud over with recognition. "So that happened?" Kate concluded. "Someone really said that?"

"Ah, yeah, yeah…" He skimmed his hand over his forehead and turned away from her momentarily. "This woman I was seeing a while ago…I guess…I guess it was shortly before I transferred to the twelfth—the spring before. Alexis would have just turned eleven. We saw each other for a couple months before she said that she liked me, but she never wanted kids and didn't want to be around them so Alexis was a deal breaker."

Castle paused and gave his apartment door a guilty look. "We, ah, she told me while we were sitting in the living room. I thought Alexis was in bed but…but I guess she heard. Damn it."

When her partner covered his face with his hands, Kate stepped in and wrapped her arms around his back. "You have a wonderful daughter," she assured him. Then, when he lowered his hands, she pressed her lips against his. "Thanks for the movie."

After she'd gone, Castle stood in the hall for another moment to collect himself. Then, he went in and found Alexis getting herself a drink in the kitchen. He leaned against the doorframe. "Sweetie, I just talked to Kate. She told me what you guys talked about before the movie. Do you want to talk to me about anything?"

Alexis shrugged and walked past him with her glass of water. "It's fine, Dad. I mean, Cayden at school told us how all parents have sex, so whatever."

Castle nearly fell over. "Whoa what? What? What?" He stammered at his daughter. Oh god, this was what having a heart attack felt like, wasn't it? Nausea. Heart palpitations. Sweating. This was it; he was dying. He'd been referring to the situation in which she felt she was responsible for him and Kate not having an official romantic relationship. How the hell did sex come up?

"Who is Cayden? And why were you talking about this?" he demanded of her.

Alexis shrugged. "It was after health class; Cayden is in my grade."

Castle covered his face with his hands. Jesus, what were they teaching kids these days? Did he even know what sex was at thirteen? Oh, right, he probably did, but still! He took a deep breath. "Okay, Alexis, okay just hold on. Let's just take a deep breath and sit down."

Her brow wrinkled. "Dad, you face is turning red."

Castle resisted the urge to moan. "I know. Sweetie, just sit down for me, please? Let's talk about this." He guided them both towards the sofa and she reluctantly followed.

"It's okay Dad."

"It's really not," he assured her. "What Cayden said is not ok. I mean, talking about other people having sex isn't polite and you shouldn't do that."

"I know that. Cayden's the one who brought it up." She tapped her fingers against her water glass before adding, "And then Peyton said she walked in on her parents and she said it was really gross, so I really don't want that to happen."

Oh god, he was going to throw up. Yep, he was definitely going to throw up.

Swallowing hard, Castle spoke with great sincerity, "Trust me, Alexis, I will do everything in my power to assure that doesn't happen."

Appearing relieved, she smiled at him. "Okay." She moved to get off the couch, but her father stopped her.

"Wait one more second. I just…What I originally meant was that I don't want you thinking in any way that you're the reason Kate and I…well, we aren't officially boyfriend and girlfriend."

Alexis considered this for a moment before posing the question, "Why aren't you?"

Castle took a deep breath. Oh that question was kind of like Pandora's Box, wasn't it? There was no way he could possibly explain the truthful reasons to her. Hell, he wasn't sure he understood them himself, so he decided to stick with the vaguest answer he could. "Many reasons. Not least of which is our work—our partnership there. Others, you're not old enough to understand, but I promise you that none of those reasons have anything to do with you."

"That's what Kate said," she told him. Castle smiled at her, and she mirrored his expression. "Thanks Dad."

Once she had walked away, Castle leaned back against the sofa and exhaled. Alexis had barely been a teenage for a few weeks and already they were having conversations like this? Jesus, if it got worse, he wasn't sure he could survive it!

"Dad! What are we having for dinner?"

Oh. Right. Food. Castle grumbled and stood from the couch. "I, ah, I'm not sure, but I think I need to take a shower first…"