I make my way over to my room but wait outside the door for just a few moments. I know Cato will be in there and I need a little time to think.
I can't believe that I played the leading role in the force that took these magnificent girls' lives away. I feel so ashamed. Finally I walk in the door and hear that shower running.
I hop into bed and don't even realize that I drifted off to sleep.
I spent the first half of the night tossing and turning. I kept replaying moments in the game in my head. Mostly the moments of me killing Cato. All of a sudden I jerk awake and meet Cato's concerned eyes fixed on me.
"Are you okay" He asks, his hand rubbing my back.
"Yeah, just a nightmare." I start, "What time is it?"
"eight thirty." He tells me.
"What time is breakfast?" I ask him, never wanting to get up.
"Nine fifteen." He says
"Oh really? Looks like we have some time to kill." I smirk at him.
"Stop it." He starts shaking his head with a smile. My brows furrow in confusion. "Stop making me want you." He finishes.
"You don't want to want me?" I ask him, raising an eyebrow in confusion.
"I don't want you, Clove," he says, his gaze never leaving mine, "I need you." He says and kisses me gently for only a moment and then he pulls back.
I am angry, that's all I get? I ask myself, but next thing I know Cato has pulled my body onto his own and is kissing me with so much passion that I could have melted. I kneel over his chest, my legs on either side of his abdomen with my hands on his shoulders. When did he take his shirt off? I didn't know and I didn't care.
His hands are on the small of my back as he grabs the hem of my shirt and pulls it over my head. Our lips break apart only to let the fabric slip between them. His hands are warm and strong on my bare back and I liked it. I feel so thin and weak compared to Cato. I am so bony and small and he is beautiful.
Cato forces me up, he sat on the bed. I was in his lap, my legs wrapped around him. Cato starts to kiss my neck and I lightly bite his ear. Cato continues to kiss my neck and I watch as his jaw clenches when he moves. I watch his abs flex when he breathes.
Cato pulls back and presses his forehead to mine. We sit there, staring into each others eyes. His are ice blue while mine are just muddy brown. He smiles at me and I begin to giggle.
"Stunning" Cato whispers under his breath.
"What?" I ask. I couldn't tell what he said.
"You are the most beautiful girl I have ever seen." Cato says.
I kiss Cato again and wrap my arms around his neck. I lean back and pull him down on top of me and I wrap my legs around his waist. I run my finger down his back, feeling every bone of his spine. He has one of his hands in mine and the other one is stroking my hair. He squeezes my hand and pulls his lips just slightly away from mine.
"I love you." He whispers and pulls his face back even more. I lift my head back up to meet his lips. He wraps my hair around his hands and something changes. It feels as though it would have been impossible for him to want me more. His muscles clench and his breathing becomes sharp. My hands are on his back and I feel little beads of sweat forming.
Cato breaks his lips away from mine and I turn my head to the right on the pillow under me. He kisses me cheek and neck and then he stops. I turn back and find his eyes searching within mine again. He looks at every part of my face, searching for what I might do. He looks into my eyes and into my soul. I smile up at him and he looks calm as he grins back.
"I love you too." I say to him. I lift up my chin so my lips were pressed to his again. Cato grips my chin lightly in his hand and guides my head back down onto the pillow.
His lips break apart from mine suddenly as he starts to kiss around my lips. He kisses his way down my right jaw, onto my neck. Then he is at my belly button, he continues going down until he reaches right at the waistband of my jeans. He pulls back and grabs the button in his two hands, but before he does anything, he looks up at me. He is breathing heavy, sweat beading on his forehead.
"Are you sure?" He asks me, looking deep into my eyes. I nod in response.
He slides my jeans down, off of my legs and then I jump onto him and pin him down again. He has his hands on my bare thighs and my hands are on the bed next to his head. And then… well…