Skulduggery, Valkyrie
Do you ever think about how dirty the phrase "I have a skeleton inside me" sounds?
Um, no.
Not even a little bit?
No, are you okay?
Marvelous!
I may or may not have a boner right now
Yeah, I'm going to go now...
(Val leaves)
Skul, Ghastly
Your scars remind me of stitches on fabric.
Okay... Thanks?
You're welcome. But you're not welcome to touch
Touch what?
My lumps my lumps my lovely lady lumps
Valkyrie, is this you?
Why would it be Vally-kins?
Yeah, okay, Val.
(Ghastly leaves)
Skul, Dexter
You are a fine piece of ass
I know
How much do you charge?
Are you calling me a hooker?
Are you not a hooker?
No, not anymore...
What if I gave you a lap dance?
Skulduggery, are you alright
I have a bit of a boner
(Dexter leaves)
Skul, Fletcher
I want to feel your hair.
Don't touch my hair! You'll mess it up.
I want to run my fingers through it while we kiss passionately.
Who is this? Val or Tanith?
Your mom!
My moms dead.
(Fake Skul leaves)
Skul, China
How often do you stare at yourself in the mirror?
Not often. Why?
I stare all the time.
At me or yourself?
At my reflection in your soulless eyes.
I'm not soulless
YOU MURDERED MY FAMILY YOU BEAUTIFUL SON OF A BITCH.
I said sorry
WELL SORRY DOESNT SWEETEN MY TEA
how would you know what sweetened tea tastes like?
Shut up!
AN: I've done the request! This was incredibly fun! If you really want the horoscopes I'll write another one. (Trying not to say your name. Can I call you Lil?) anyway. I freaking loved writing this and may make a part two.
Aeyla Skywalker: I'm glad you like my stories! I'm still in denial about Ravel. I still cry. I'm going to do dexter with everyone. How about that? Maybe just Val's parents and Fergus and Beryl. I was thinking about writing one with older Alice getting a crush on him and Valkyrie freaking out. Of course Dexter would make it worse by flirting with both females. And for the stories. I didn't like them because i couldn't really think of anything to write and they didn't make me laugh.