Val, Skul
C'mon, Skul, pleeeeaaaassssseeee?
No, I'm in the middle of a meeting
So? I'm more important! Tell them I'm going into labor!
And what happens when they start asking about the baby?
False alarm
Valkyrie, you can wait a few hours
You can wait a few hours
For?
Idk yet I'll think of something though
Have fun with that
(Little while later)
I JUST REALIZED I HAVENT PUNCHED ANYONE IN LIKE TWO MONTHS
Do not go out and hit anyone
Why not?
You look like someone shoved a watermelon in your shirt
Excuse you! And anyways I'm pregnant. I won't get punched back
I'd punch you back
Yeah, but you're a dick
(Later)
I'm bored
Leave the meeting and buy me food?
I think you've had enough food
Did you just call me fat?
Well, you're not necessarily skinny
Fuck you, man
I've clearly struck a nerve
I have another person in me! OF COURSE IM FAT!
Okay, so, if you know you're fat then why are you yelling at me?
BECAUSE YOURE NOT ALLOWED TO TELL ME IM FAT! ONLY IM ALLOWED TO SAY IM FAT!
I don't understand
YOURE SUPPOSED TO TELL ME IM AMAZING AND BEAUTIFUL AND STUFF
Why would I lie?
You are SO lucky I can't fit behind the steering wheel of my car!
Why?
Because id be driving down there to punch you in the face!
ALL I SAID IS THAT YOUVE GAINED WEIGHT!
That's okay
What?
It's okay
Why is it okay?
Because you won't be able to talk once I rip your jaw off
Um, can you not do that?
I'm going to sell it on the black market
Couldn't you just kill me?
No, this way is more painful
I fear you, sometimes
Good
Valkyrie?
Yes?
Please don't take my jaw
Hmmm, fine
... I don't trust you
Good
YOURE FREAKING ME OUT MAN
You want to be freaked out even more?
Not necessarily
My water just broke
Haha so funny
I'm not joking
Seriously?
Yes
Shit...
AN: Is this what you people wanted? Now I can't get the image of pregnant Val out of my head. I needed to get something in there about Val hitting people. Skulduggery probably wouldn't let her work on any fun cases after he found out.
PokGirlBlue: well then. Don't hurt yourself. This does wonders for my ego.
Skyla: You are the second one to fall out of your chair. Does no one ever sit on couches anymore?
Blossom The Cat: thanks
Aeyla: I thought about making it Val but that's unoriginal. Skul would be the one to message people things like that and mess with them though.
Cosmic Echo: Hope you liked this and it was everything you've ever dreamed of.
BethShadows: THANK GOD someone sits on couches these days! Why am I so excited about this?
Berlin: I used to do it every other day but then school happened and I *deep sigh* school is cruel.