Slow Way Home
Chapter 27

[Day 34 of 45]

Christopher Pike was sitting in his private medical quarters, food in front of him and his companion, and they were talking of the repairs the ship was undertaking while they were in flight. However, Jim didn't seem to have much of an appetite. She kept moving food around her plate rather than eating.

She kept up with conversation though it was lacking her normal enthusiasm. It was as if somebody else – a stranger – was updating him.

"How are you dealing?" he asked, changing the topic.

"With?" she asked.

"Everything, you look tired," Pike told her, worried. Her skin was pale, deep dark bags were under her dull eyes which had lost their vibrancy. This worried him.

"I've been having nightmares," Jim admitted with a shrug. He looked at her, worriedly. She seemed to hesitate for a moment but he gave her that look. She always gave in to that look. "I'm on Delta Vega watching Vulcan be destroyed. Like Older Spock did. However, as I'm watching I hear a noise." He nodded. "I can't see it but I hear it coming so I start running. It's blistering cold and I run. Then, out of nowhere there are the twins. Just standing there. I grab them because I can't let the monster grab my babies. Then I run some more, pulling them behind."

He nods, understanding that fear. She takes a hesitant breath before continuing.

"Then… Jory slips. As that happens something rips him away. I watch him be dragged by his ankles and he's screaming. I can't… I can't get to him. Then I turn back to Mandy and she's gone. And I'm alone and…" He nods understanding.

"You hate being alone," he states and she nods.

"Sometimes Spock is there, and he disappears too. Other times I'm watching… I'm watching the older Spock's son die like he did," Jim admitted. He understands because she told him everything. Or he believes she did. About the older Spock. That she saw their life.

"I understand," he said. "You are worried about it happening. But it won't. You are a strong woman."

"Maybe. But I was even stronger in that other reality, more stable even, but I still Lost David. I watched my husband die, and when I finally managed to get him back I lost our son. I'm not sure I'm that strong," she admitted to him and he knew she rarely let people see her fear, her pain. "And what's worse – I never had David in this reality but because of the meld I love him as if he were my own. I think of him as my son. And I lost him. How screwed up is that?"

"You won't lose Mandy and Jory," Pike reminded her. She was still so young. "You won't lose Spock."

"What if I do?" she asked and he sighed before grabbing her hand. She was stronger than she believed. For all her showboating, her cocky flirting and apparent ego, she was highly self-conscious. It was moments like those that showed him she could be a great captain. Possibly the greatest in Starfleet. She was young, headstrong, but she cared. No matter what she did she would do her damnedest to help.

And she appeared to finally be ready to respect the chair.

"I will always be right here," he told her. "If the worst happens you have a big family. The Doctor, Gaila, Scotty, Your In-laws… " She nodded her head and he watched her dip her head.

"Anyways," she stated clamming back up and they returned to work.

Slow Way Home

Amanda Grayson walked down the corridors beside her son, passing the Crew and Guests all working together. Even though she wasn't psychically strong she sensed her son's worry through the parental bond she shared with him.

"How are you dealing?" Amanda asked and Spock glanced at her.

"With?" he asked. She didn't sense sarcasm. Since reuniting with Jim she'd heard him use Sarcasm… subtly but it was there. Still, he was sincere.

"You are a father now," she told him and he nodded. "How are you handling it?"

"Adequately," he told her and she gave him a look. That's as they arrived at his and Tibby's quarters. Opening the door they entered and she saw him relax subtly. As the door closed he turned to look at her. "Mother… how am I to know if my actions are correct for the twins?"

"I don't know," she told him and he frowned. "Parents try their best but we fail. Raising you amongst the Vulcans… I still don't know if that was what was best. You were tormented by your peers. You never had the chance to be happy as a child."

"I worry I will fail as a parent," he admitted and she nodded while touching his clothed arm.

"You will be alright, as long as you try your best," she told her son. He nodded. She could see the wheels turning.

Slow Way Home

Vera smiled as Providence chattered away about 'Tommy'. He was a cute red haired boy her daughter had a crush on.

She missed her husband. He'd understood their daughter better than anyone else. Though she couldn't wait to get home to her daughter. She wasn't meant to be in space. She was a base doctor. Her jobs were to be on a planet working to heal people that way.

"Mother, I love you," Providence told Vera who smiled.

"Love you too, sweetheart," Vera told her daughter. Then they ended communication. Despite everything dark in her life, it felt like something good was coming and maybe she'd be happy again. She was worried about her husband not being there but life was moving forward. She just had to hold on.

Slow Way Home

Gaila Roe wasn't feeling very well. She'd been sick off and on all day. It was the worst time for her to catch a bug. Laying down she set the alarm to wake her in forty-five minutes. Bones moved towards her as she laid down.

"Get better, love," he told her. She smiled at him. "I wish you'd let me look you over." He said while grabbing for his Tricorder. She put a hand over it.

"Bones, go doctor somebody else," she said. "Before I break that." Her eyes turned to the Tricorder for a moment and he rolled his eyes.

"Note to self. You get moody when you're sick," Bones stated and she waved him away. As he left the room he turned and threw a look back at her. Then he disappeared. She sighed, closing her eyes while sinking into the mattress.

Sleep came easily.