Summer Rain / Omake.
A/N: Do you ever just think back to the old chapters and question why or how Takeshi came to like Sakura? Well, I question it. And now you will see from this omake (if you choose to read it) that he questions it too. :)
Written in present tense (something I don't ever do) just for a try and for a hang of it. I write things mostly for a purpose. So here you will read in third person, limited on Takeshi to access his thoughts on Sakura. You can analyze and decide for yourself in the end about his feelings or regards for her LOL. I'm terrible at understanding guys and especially a guy who I assume would think about baseball a lot (and I'm sure I got the references wrong, feel free to fix me if I do) so don't expect anything great ;_;
Read if you're bored while I figure out what kind of direction I want Summer Rain to go in... also if I want to make up a random mafia family and add in some trouble (still thinking). Would it be too boring without? Or too much with? If you have any thoughts or suggestions, let me know. c: Well, enjoy!
P.s. Italics for emphasis. And sometimes the emphasis means a certain person. Italicized senpai, he, him = Hibari. c:
Always
Yamamoto Takeshi
"Now, now. We could always-"
"SHUT UP, BASEBALL BRAIN. No one is asking about your intake!" Gokudera snaps, glaring up at him. Same as usual so Takeshi chuckles (he'd chuckle anyways though).
"Ah, Gokudera-kun! It's okay," Tsuna put his hands up and tries to calm the silver haired male.
Takeshi glances over to Sakura, smiling and covering her mouth as she laughed. Though it didn't quite reach her eyes. It never really does.
They are currently walking home together with Tsuna and Gokudera as usual (sometimes senpai would join them but he had boxing practice today). All is normal. Even her smile-but-not-really-smile is normal, sadly.
Sometimes he wonders why she did it. To be polite? He believes that she probably assumes no one ever notices. But he does. He spends more time glancing at her than she probably realizes.
She's pretty. Her light pink hair that smells wonderfully like the flowers she's named after (the kind of thing that reminds him 'Ah, she's definitely a girl'). Her warm brown eyes that always made him feel a certain way but he wasn't entirely sure what... it's kind of like a feeling when he knows his friends are watching him play baseball. Her smile was nice but he finds himself wishing that she would truly smile. So he cleverly calls it a smile-but-not-really-smile.
Though she does. She does sometimes. On rare occasions and he finds himself keeping track of it. He would count the time when they surprised her for her birthday but- she kind of cried then. Happy tears, she said. He didn't really know people cried happily, it seemed contradicting, but then again he remembers the first game he picked up the weight and carried the team to victory- he remembers the tears then.
She smiled when he gave her the birthday gift, it was a soft and kind glow that made the hour he spent in the jewelry shop after a long day of practice worth it. But it gives him this heavy feeling, a bit of an ache, when he recalls the brightest smile (bright like the blazing sun on those summer days of baseball practice) he saw on her- when senpai gave her the clip.
"Takeshi-kun?" She's looking up at him now.
And he smiles, as always. "What is it, Sakura-chan?"
"Nothing, you just seem a bit out of it. Are you okay?" she asks. Caring, kind as always.
He chuckles. It's just what he does, no matter what. "Of course."
She nods, thinking nothing more of it. Sometimes he wonders if she sees more than she says. Though she says little. At least to him.
He looks over at Gokudera who was now grumbling about how close Sakura is walking to Tsuna. "You need to give juudaime his space!"
"I-It's okay, Gokudera! It's really okay, Sakura-chan."
Sometimes he would expect her to argue with Gokudera the way he feels like she would if it were senpai. But instead she only casually takes a step farther, still looking up at the sky as if it was more interesting than what the gray haired male was saying.
"Ah, I guess I'll be going this way now," Tsuna said.
"Okay, juudaime. Please be careful on your way home," Gokudera smiles. Only ever to Tsuna, as always.
"Thank you, Gokudera-kun. I'll see you all tomorrow," Tsuna smiles before waving.
"Bye, Tsuna! See you, Gokudera!" Takeshi grins as he waves back. Gokudera only scoffs and walks away with two hands shoved in his pockets.
Sakura nods with a smile, not quite reaching her eyes as always, and gives a small wave.
Then they split up and walk their separate ways. Sakura by his side, as always. When everyone splits up into different directions, she would remain by his side. He wonders if he's anything more to her than a walking buddy. She told him he was special once- perhaps twice. Said he was her closest friend. Closest friend.
It was silent for awhile, there's nothing to say usually. But he was comfortable in the silence with her and he thinks she feels the same way. Though sometimes he would bring up a conversation.
"Would you like to play?" he asks as they stroll by a baseball field of a park. ..And the conversation was usually about baseball. At least he didn't bring up questions she never really seemed to enjoy answering, which is usually thirty percent of total conversations (he would usually get an 'out' for those). But what else is there to talk about?
Though he could tell she wasn't truly interested in baseball either. But she tries nonetheless. "Um. I don't mind watching you- Ah. I guess it doesn't work that way," she purses her lips in thought. He already regret asking her. He knows she's too nice to outwardly decline. "Uh. I don't mind pitching. Some people say I'm pretty good at it," she uses a joking tone and she gives him a silly thumbs up.
He hums, watching her expression. Smiling, waiting. She smiles often. But she doesn't really smile. At least, not often.
"It's fine, Sakura-chan," and he lets her go with his usual gesture, ruffling the back of his head. He rather she doesn't force herself to do anything she doesn't want to do.
"Are you sure?" her eyebrows knit slightly. He knows she felt bad at the choice of words she used or afraid she said something wrong. She seems to feel that way often, he notices.
"Yep," he chuckles and places a hand on her head. She was shorter than him by probably seven inches. Seven inches is a lot, he realizes. He was five feet ten and he assumes she was only around five feet three. She was petite, small, and thin. The baggy navy blue cardigan she wore, the sleeves that cover her hand sometimes made her seem even smaller. But it was cute in his opinion anyways.
She nods and turns her attention back to the street. She was always careful, he realizes. He also realizes that he started walking slower ever since she started walking by his side. Her strides were smaller than his. He had much longer legs after all.
"Ah!" she exclaims in a short breath as she runs over to something. "Takeshi-kun, it's a kitty!" She exclaims happily as she bends down, staring at a small black cat. She reaches a hand out to it slowly and it regards her for another moment, slowly easing in.
"You like cats?" He asks. He didn't know that. Then again, he didn't know a lot of things about her. She beams as she successfully picks it up. For a moment, he was gaping at how excited she looks. It was as excited as he has ever seen her actually.
"Yeah. I love cats," she answers softly with a warm smile as she scratches the cat's ears. It meows and snuggles into her, causing a giggle. "I wonder who it belongs to," she muses.
"It has a collar," he points out as he bends down with her. He reaches a large hand out to it- but it shies away immediately, hissing. Takeshi chuckles. "I don't think it likes me."
"It's probably just scared," she reassures him. But it warmed up to her, quickly too.
Though he doesn't blame the cat. He was more of a dog person himself. "You prefer cats over dogs?"
She replies right away. "Yeah. Dogs are nice though but- I don't know. I just.. I love cats," she smiles gently as she pets the cat. "You actually have to play with dogs. Cats kind of do their own things which I prefer," she adds. Her words linger in his mind for a moment but he pushes it away. "Cats lay around. I lay around. We could lay around together," she laughs softly to herself. He didn't really take her for a lazy type though he knew she wasn't exactly very active.
After another moment, it jumps away and she watches as it leaves. Though she wasn't pouting like he'd expect her to. She simply watches it calmly, presumingly lost in thought. He wonders what she thinks about.
"Ah, it left," she whispers but to no one in particular. She picks herself up and he stands up as well. "Shall we go?" she turns to face him with a kind smile.
He nods and they walk side by side. From the side, he notices a few guys from other schools staring at her with whispers and grins. This happens from time to time and he doesn't really know if she truly doesn't notice or doesn't bother to notice. Takeshi casually takes a few steps closer to her, a bit too close- since he bumps into her.
"Sorry," he said with an apologetic grin. She looks up at him with a questioning expression but she returns a smile, yet again.
He glances ahead and finds an arcade, one out of an assortment of other shops that he dully passes by. "Sakura-chan, do you like arcades?" A conversation topic more than anything even though he notices that she didn't really bother to talk much unless spoken to.
He thinks he heard her muttering something about 'crowded'. "Not really. It sounds fun though," she says and he's sure that wasn't what it sounded like she said a moment ago. "Do you?" she asks politely and that was probably why she changed her answer. She was polite. And careful.
"Yeah, they're pretty cool. Though I don't have much time for it," he replies.
"Did you want to go?" she offers. Polite, again.
He shakes his head, sparing her. "Then.." He really didn't know what she would like to do. Not baseball sadly, and not arcades apparently. "If you could do something you want to do, what would it be?"
She stares at him but she was in thought. Her expression darkens for a short moment, fast but he caught it, and she recollects herself as quickly as it came. He wonders if she had it in her to have negative thoughts. Ones such as revenge. And after seeing her anger after that day-
"Maybe travel," she muses. "But if that's too much… I do like cherry blossom viewing- Ah, though that's only in Spring," she purses her lips. He realizes he likes the way she always puts a lot of thought into his questions- sometimes.
Sometimes he wishes she didn't have to think so hard. Especially on the questions he knows she dislikes being asked. The ones that he couldn't help but ask once in awhile anyways. Though it never turns out so well.
"Ehh? I didn't know. I should've taken you this Spring," he frowns. What was he doing even, he tries to remember. He should've. It should have been obvious that it was something she would be interested in. Kind of.
She seems confused for a moment until something dawns on her and she laughs softly. Her laugh-but-not-really-laugh. "It's fine," and she turns back to the street. "I went on my birthday." She did? He didn't fail to notice the change in her expression- a barely noticeable pink color on her cheeks. He internally questions the reason behind it but he knew better to not. Plus, he could guess the answer anyways.
And the way she turned- she did that sometimes. She does it when there was something she didn't want to speak about.
He watches her and notices the strand of hair that arches over her head, kind of like a loop. It kind of reminds him of an alien. He wonders if he should tell her. How would she react? Would she react the way she does when….
"Sakura-chan. You look like an alien with a strand of her sticking up on your head," he tests with a chuckle.
She looks up at him with slightly parted lips before stopping and glancing into a store's window. She frowns slightly and pats it down. "An alien, huh," she muses. "Sure. I'm weird anyways," she laughs softly as she turns back. Another laugh-but-not-really-laugh.
Well, he didn't quite expect that. He wasn't sure what he expected. Though he kind of hoped she would have a more interesting reaction. But he supposes she was always like this. Except… And Takeshi silences his mind. But it was harder than it sounds.
She tends to always be the same around him. Calm, smiling. That smile-but-not-really-smile. She was frustrated with him once- the night of her birthday. Sometimes she was worried. Twice she cried around him. She's grateful, appreciative of him, he's sure. She's polite and she's reserved. She jokes sometimes but rarely and they were mostly insults to herself. She was impressed at his baseball games, he remembers proudly.
He thinks that's about it. He remembers that she was shy once, when all his actions (when he pat her head, when he pulled her into a hug, when he requested her to call him 'Takeshi') were new to her he assumes- when they barely knew each other. Those days seem more like a dream now.
She no longer seems unsure of what she says around him- or anyone for the matter. She didn't blush as much and he starts to wonder why she did to begin with.
Though that isn't all. He knows there's more to her. Takeshi has seen more. But seen and experience were a home run apart when it came to scores.
Her outbursts that he was at first shocked to hear but was amused by at the same time. Her anger, her fuming. Her teasing. Her embarrassment. Her annoyance, her irritation. Her speechlessness, her amusement. Her disappointment, her confusion. Her waiting, her chase. Her glare, her frown, her pout, her gaze, her surprise, her smile/grin/smirk even-
To the same person. To the same person she dropped her carefulness around as if she couldn't keep it together even if she tried. The person that she suffered to even be polite to, and Takeshi was almost sure she put politeness first. The person that somehow pulls out every inner traits she had, the traits he only ever sees her show around him.
Ones Takeshi would not have known those traits to exist in polite, ever so careful Sakura if he didn't witness it. Because she never showed such things to him at least, something he started to notice some time ago.
She almost always let Takeshi win, though there was nothing to 'win' (and sometimes he wonders if she prefers a challenge but it wasn't in him to challenge her). But she doesn't let him win. And when she does fight Takeshi back, he wishes that she didn't. Wishes that there wasn't anything to fight back about.
She only ever stops to turn around to find him when he stops walking by her side. Because it was natural, he realizes. They wouldn't truly be friends if she didn't at least do that, he thinks. But she doesn't scan the room to find him. She doesn't look back to a place, knowing that she'd find him. Doesn't glance over her shoulder. Doesn't snap her head over at attention if she knows he was in the area. She does do all of that. Just not to him. But him.
He's sure she never really watches his back when he leaves. Because sometimes, he looks over his shoulder, one last glance at her. But him. She watches as he leaves. An expression kind of like… Kind of like when she watched that little black cat leave. Cat. A bit amused mixed with another type of emotion, he wonders if that's why she likes cats (but he doesn't think so). Or if that's why she likes-
He pushes that thought away too. He doesn't dwell much on things he doesn't quite understand. But he dwells on her, so he's not too sure. She was like a curve ball. But even those, he knew how to handle.
But perhaps she likes cats because she's like a cat? Though he doesn't want to think so because that cat didn't seem to like him. Then again, he doesn't like cats that much either (though he as nothing against them). He finds them cute, only a bit boring. Cats couldn't really be played with, they're tease-able and pettable- But there's more than one type of cat, he concludes.
Anyways. She always comes up with a reply whenever Takeshi speaks to her. But he notices she found it harder when it came to him. And he finds himself wondering which is the better end.
Though…
He frowns when he thinks about that day. The day when Takeshi finally decided to admit that this whole 'mafia game' Tsuna and others play wasn't really a game. The day when he realized that 'mission' they went on, to that burning poor poor poor home... Was her home.
And the day when he found her in his arms. That ached a bit but he remembers her crying face and miserable screams ached more; he remembers clenching his fist just like the others. And he wonders if the ache he felt- when he held out a hand to her and she stared at it blankly before sinking further into his chest, clutching as if he was her only savior and perhaps he was- was in between the pain of other two aches.
He snaps out of his thoughts as she snaps open her phone. And who is she talking to, he questions inside. Though he knew, he didn't really want to. She tenses just momentarily as she reads it, frowning and scowling at it. And she texts back quickly, slightly annoyed as she sighs. Usually when this happens, she goes and buys something sometime later. Inside, he questions as to why that person doesn't just drop the act as if he always needed something. He didn't have to. He had her attention-
If only Takeshi had a phone. He would get one if that means they would talk more- but baseball equipment and what not demands more money and more priority than the phone. And if he admits it, though it isn't too hard he realizes, baseball holds almost as much priority as her. Not HER but he means that his relationship progression with her.
Sure, she was his friend. And he treasures her because of that. Friends are nice, after all. And Takeshi loves his friends. And then that means that he loves her.
But he also loves baseball. It is a passion, perhaps worth a thousand suns. The powerful feeling he received when he plays- the adrenaline he gets from the games. The hardworking, paid off sweat going toward skills, scores, games, and winning-
He is losing track of what he was thinking. But baseball made him feel so much. He wonders how she makes him feel. She was pretty. Pretty and the only girl he ever really noticed for beauty. He remembers the first time he saw her, when he somehow hit a ball that almost injured her. She dodged that with some kind of remarkable reflex or luck, he didn't know that day. But he knows now- that it was reflex.
He remembers staring at her for a moment. She was new, a new face, a new student. And he was amazed for a moment. He wonders if it was when she moved here, if it was a start of something life changing for him- or if it just happened to be when the whole 'mafia game' started.
But now that he was thinking, he really wasn't sure how she made him feel. She wasn't baseball. Oh no, she wasn't. She was a girl. Girls and baseball are different. Much much much different. He at least knew that. It would be nice if they were the same thing. He loves baseball.. and girls- well, girls aren't baseball. Hm, moving on.
He starts to wonder what it would be like if she enjoyed baseball too- though she didn't unfortunately. And if she also knew how to wield a sword, it would be cool- though he didn't care too much about that.
He starts to wonder if it even matters that she likes cats over dogs, opposite of him. But little things like that shouldn't matter.
He likes her petite-ness, it made her cute, but he kind of questions what it'd be like if she were taller. He also couldn't imagine if she were to be a bit more.. loose, not so feminine but then he questions himself why he was trying to imagine her like that to begin with.
And though he likes her long hair too, he imagines how refreshing it'd be if she were to cut it short. It'd be better for sports- though she didn't play sports. Then while he was at it, he couldn't help but wish she played more sports or would actually like to go places like the arcade. Perhaps there would be more to talk about-
"Takeshi-kun?" she calls out, staring at him with those warm brown eyes. Her eyes silently question his thoughts but she doesn't ask. Perhaps she didn't really want to know but he believes she would deep down, at least an itsy bitsy small little itty bit. "We're here," she states as the both of them stop in front of his sushi restaurant (where she didn't enjoy working).
But he didn't care about what she would be like. Or what she liked. Or even who. He cared about her. Sure, he found her pretty first. But now, she was his precious friend after all this time. And though he wonders if she'd ever be more than a friend, or what she felt for him even though he's sure what he felt for her was what people around him deemed as 'love'- He knows she'll at least be his friend. Always.
"Yeah," he grins, like always. And he adds in a chuckle like he usually does. "Sorry, I wasn't watching where I was walking." She says nothing more, only a small nod and another polite smile.
He wonders if she is ever interested in him, though she doesn't ask him as much questions as he asks her. If she questions his thoughts the way he questions her. If she spends time looking at him (though he is a bit disappointed to say their gaze never meets) like the way he glances at her. He wonders if she has preferences and if he doesn't really meet it.
But she stays by his side and she walks alongside him. And after all this time with her, he realizes she wouldn't really do something she didn't want to do. So he realizes at least they agree on something- that they don't really care that they're not the same. Because it doesn't matter to friends, and so they were friends regardless.
Although he could probably figure it out- admit if he wants to, he doesn't really know how she feels. Truly. Because she hasn't really answered to his, to her: unwanted, questions. Perhaps he might've made a few strikes, he would imagine. Perhaps two, two to her unhappy but vague answers. But it wasn't three. So he won't give up, not until he was 'out'.
Yamamoto Takeshi doesn't give up until the 'game' was over. Never. Just like always.
But vaguely, he questions:
Is always a comforting home to go back to, or an inescapable curse?