"Abed, which way?" Troy asked, following directly behind his best friend.
"You tell me, Gandalf," Abed replied. They had almost completed a circle going around the campus, during which, Abed had lost his sword.
"Should we go back to the quad?"
"If that's what you think. You're Gandalf the White. You should know."
"Cool," Troy smiled wide. "Will Excalibur be there?"
"Could be. There were too many people on the quad beforehand to know for certain if we missed it."
"You think we missed it?"
"Possibly."
Off in the distance, someone screamed. Shortly after, "Pop pop," could be heard.
"Magnitude," Troy whispered.
Duncan hopped in front of Abed and stuck him with a plastic knife. "Gotcha!" the British professor laughed.
Abed opened his mouth, letting air out as he moved his head back and forth.
"What's that?" Duncan asked, stepping away from Abed's breath.
"Fire. You're dead."
"I just killed you."
"I'm Smaug. Smaug has impenetrable scales, even on his stomach. You merely broke your knife," Abed replied. "I just breathed fire on you. You're dead."
"This is bloody rubbish!" Duncan declared, throwing his toy knife to the ground by his feet.
Abed shrugged. "Blame J. R. R. Tolkien."
"Good job, Abed," Troy exclaimed. "I was worried there for a moment." Just as soon as he ended his sentence, Troy felt the point of something at the center of his back.
"Pop pop," Magnitude said from behind him. He was dressed as an elvish warrior with a short sword.
"Troy," Abed breathed.
"Abed," Troy cried.
Abed moved to the right to get a view of Magnitude's weapon. It looked just like he always imagined an elvish sword. "Cool sword. Can I see it?"
"Uh, sure," Magnitude said, handing over the sword.
Abed turned it around, jabbing Magnitude with it. "Got ya," he said happily. "Sorry it had to go that way, but Hulu is very important to me. Nice sword though," he said, giving the sword back to Magnitude.
Magnitude sighed, taking the sword and walked away.
"I'll find Excalibur, Troy," Abed promised.
"I know you will, Abed." Troy sighed. "I should have been Gandalf the Grey. That way, I could have come back to life as Gandalf the White."
"We all make mistakes, Troy." Abed patted Troy on the shoulder. "Get ready for a Lethal Weapon marathon."
"Great! Can we reenact it again?" Troy asked excited as ever.
"Do you even have to ask, Murtaugh?"
"Go get 'em, kid. I'm getting too old for this shit."
Abed gave a light smile. "Cool. Cool, cool, cool."
"Are you sure Star Burns has Pierce?" Britta asked, walking quietly around a building.
Shirley nodded. "I saw them take him when Chang's army was attacking." Shirley held onto the sword that came with her Joan of Arc costume.
Neither of them had been spotted yet. It was a good thing too. It was hard enough for Britta to run in her giant horse costume. If they got caught, she would barely be able to defend herself. Since the costume was so big, she couldn't move her legs very fast or her arms. Britta could hardly look to her sides. She managed to hold onto a knife that Shirley had given her, but truthfully, it was only for looks. If anyone attacked her, she couldn't defend herself with it.
"Let me go, Sun Burn!" Pierce yelled.
Shirley and Britta both came to a quick halt.
"Isn't that kidnapping?" Britta said.
"Are we going to free him?" Shirley asked.
"It's my duty to help him. Star Burns is taking away his right to freedom."
"Whatever you say, anarchist," Shirley mumbled. "How are we going to free him? We'll have to battle against four people, and then Star Burns. You won't be any help dressed up like that."
"I could be some help," Britta pouted. "But Shirley, you're the greatest woman warrior. You can do this."
"I am?" Shirley smiled.
"Well, who you're dressed as was."
"Mmm. I'll take it, I guess," she said, her enthusiasm drained a little.
"What should I do?"
"Be the distraction," Shirley suggested. Get them to come out here. They've got to be inside the building. That's where Pierce's voice came from. Once they come out, I'll be able to fight them off easier.
Britta sighed. "Sure." She went in front of some of the windows and started galloping back and forth. "Nay! Nay!" she said as Shirley just shook her head.
"Hey! That's Britta. Get her!" Star Burns ordered from inside the building.
Three students came running out of the building. Shirley snuck up behind one and stabbed him. The other two turned to face her - one had an axe, the other held a long sword.
"God, be with me," Shirley said, rushing at them. Her sword was pointed straight ahead. One student backed up, scared of Shirley's war face. This allowed Shirley to stab her sword forward further and catch the fearful one in the stomach. She turned to the student with the long sword. He swiped down, but Shirley blocked the blow. He swung under her feet to which she jumped up and brought her sword on the back of his neck. She squealed happily.
Walking into the building, Shirley only saw Star Burns. "Where's your other ghoul?" she asked.
"I could ask you the same question," Star Burns replied. "Except making it plural."
"We got separated," she said honestly.
They were in a classroom with Pierce sitting at a desk and Star Burns standing beside him with a fake sword in his hand.
"You came back for me," Pierce exclaimed.
"You came back to watch him die," Star Burns said. "I'll get to you afterwards."
Just then, the window burst and the missing student flew into the classroom with Britta coming through just after her. She stood up energetically with glass shards in her costume. "I got her!" Britta announced proudly about the student groaning as she got up from the floor and walked out the door disappointed.
Star Burns turned to Britta as Shirley dashed forward sticking him in the back.
"No!" Star Burns yelled. "I was going to watch Breaking Bad with that Hulu pass! I need to get some tips on . . ." he stopped talking and ran out of the classroom.
"Britta, we did it!" Shirley exclaimed, jumping up and down clapping.
Britta made a face. "Star Burns got me just before you got him."
"No, Brit-ta."
"Sorry, Shirley. Good luck."
Shirley watched as Britta left the room. She frowned.
"I have something that will turn that frown upside down," Pierce said, standing up from his seat.
"I don't want to know," Shirley told him.
"Thank you for saving me," Pierce smiled.
"You're welcome, Pierce."
Piece moved in to hug her. He put his arms around her. Shirley pushed him off and stuck him with her sword.
"Hey!" he yelled.
"I'm not spending this whole game with you harassing me." Shirley shook her head. "I won't be able to last a minute more being stuck with only you."
"Guess I deserve that." Pierce shrugged. "But fine! You won't have the company of a noble jester."
"What a pity," she replied sarcastically.