"You're kidding." I gasped. Magnus had pulled back but I could still feel the ghost of him on my lips.
He thought Zach had planned to kiss me? No. There was no way.
"You don't see the way he looks at you?" Magnus' smirk could be incredibly annoying at times. How could be so assured? He hadn't known Zach for longer than five minutes! He hadn't even been at the party. He didn't know what had happened.
"You mean smiling?" I asked with a fair amount of sarcasm. "He smiles at everybody. That's pretty much his thing."
"Maybe he does. But the smile I got said 'back-off'." Magnus placed a hand on my shoulder, replicating Zach's movement a few moments before. He smiled, too, but made sure I got an eyeful of the challenging look in his eyes as he said: "This is mine."
I scoffed and ducked from beneath his grasp. Magnus was crazy. A guy like him who saw mating opportunities in anything with a pulse was bound to get that idea. I was convinced he had it wrong.
We entered the diner still debating Magnus' 'discovery' – that was what he called it. I labelled it a misconception – the sign outside had read 'Takis'. I'd never noticed the place before.
The inside had the same kind of slightly-dim lighting as Java Jones and the menus looked a little worse for wear. It was nice. Not too sterile looking, not a complete dump either.
"You're ridiculous." I muttered once Magnus had sent the waitress off for cold drinks.
"I'm ridiculous?" Magnus laughed. "You got desire confused with homophobia. That is ridiculous."
"I did not!" I snapped, summoning the restraint not to whine about it. I hid my face behind my menu to hide my embarrassment.
Magnus wasn't right. He wasn't.
But what if he was?
I thought about how much would fall into place if what Magnus said was true. Like why it would matter to Zach if Jace had turned out to be my boyfriend. Or why he'd avoid me for so long – thinking I had a sexual harassment claim against him or something.
"I did not." I reiterated. This time more for my own benefit. New doubts in my mind were the last thing I needed but now I'd have to be keeping my ears open again. If anything, this new suspicion was more awkward than when I thought Zach had a problem with me.
Magnus tilted my menu down to the table so he could look into my eyes. He appeared to be searching me. I cast my gaze back downward.
"Am I an idiot?" I asked. I felt like one. Stupid, oblivious Alec. Always missing the signs. A step behind everybody else.
Magnus reached out a hand to cover mine. He was warm as ever. "No. You're just innocent."
I managed to snap out of my thoughts and pulled a face at him; wrinkling my nose at the implication. Children and puppy dogs were 'innocent'. Not me. I told him as much and Magnus responded by grinning. Something told me he wasn't convinced.
"Okay." He conceded. "More like… New. I mean, you didn't even date before me, did you?"
Not in any real capacity. I'd had guys I liked and guys I'd spent time with; I wasn't a complete shut-in. The thing was that I was aiming for a very small section in the middle of a Venn diagram of 'Gay' and 'Compatible' males. I never would have pegged Magnus as being in that section, yet there we were.
I nodded along. "No, I didn't date."
"So you never learned the signals." Magnus professed. I was sure he was master of the signals; although that wasn't a skill he ever had to use on me.
I wasn't one to stand out, but when it came to flirtation I was about as subtle as neon. Not in that cool, confident way Magnus and Jace had, either. Mine was a foot-in-mouth kind of obviousness where I just couldn't keep my intentions veiled. Jace had known about my crush on him long before I did.
"Is this the part where you try to school me on 'the signals'?" I joked. The waitress came back carrying two glasses and set them down in front of us. I could proudly say I actually noticed her flirtation with Magnus; the way her body turned to almost cut me out of the picture. Magnus gave my hand another squeeze, right in plain sight of her, and she veered off.
I couldn't keep my smile at bay.
That's more like it. I thought. Which probably would have made me sound like a possessive gnat had I said it out loud. I figured it was alright to think though. I could be selfish in my own mind; so long as in the real world I showed I appreciated the efforts Magnus made to be different.
I'd seen the backlash that occurred when I didn't. Magnus was happy to drop this whole arrangement he'd had with Camille but he wanted the fact he'd done that to be acknowledged. Which I thought was fair enough; I was as grateful to have another chance as he was. Even if it did take me a while to decide that was what I wanted.
"I'm not teaching you anything." Said Magnus. "It would be too easy to lose you if you knew how expendable I am."
Not only did the statement itself surprise me; so did Magnus' sincerity. He really seemed to think there was a risk there. I thought he was insane if he thought my cup runneth over with options. I wasn't that oblivious.
"I already have this younger Doctor guy to worry about." He continued with a little of his usual humour coming back to his voice.
"You don't have to worry about anybody." I said, seriously. I wasn't his ex-wife; Magnus wasn't going to look over his shoulder one day and find me sleeping with my workmates.
I got the raised-eyebrow response.
"I have you." I said without much thought. Then I suddenly re-thought as quickly as the words left my mouth. Unfortunately I couldn't come up with a counter-statement fast enough and started to babble. "Well, not officially. I mean we're- I just- You know-"
"If you don't mind me asking…" I didn't mind Magnus saying anything that interrupted my shocking display of incoherency. "Why not officially?"
My thoughts went from hazy static to blank slate. All that I had left at my disposal was the autopilot saying the things I knew I should say.
"It's too soon." I heard myself reply. "It's not the right time."
Magnus leant back in his seat casually and seemed to contemplate this. Eyes cast to the ceiling, fingers around his chin and all. "But you are planning to make it official at some point?"
"Yes. Of course I am." I wouldn't have stood by and let everything he Magnus had had before fall apart if I didn't.
Now Magnus nodded. "And we're already exclusive. I haven't looked elsewhere. You have nobody lined up?"
"No." I agreed. "There's nobody else."
"And we see each other one-on-one an awful lot." By now Magnus was squinting at me like he didn't quite understand what was going on. "I don't want to be pushy Sweatpea but pouring water into a cola bottle doesn't make it fizzy."
I blinked at him. "What are you getting at?"
"If you're treating this like a relationship, I don't think labelling it something else makes a difference." Magnus lifted my fingers up to his lips, leaned forward and kissed them reassuringly. "And I'd like to be together, already."
I bit down on my lip. Magnus knew how to be persuasive and he raised a pretty good point. Of course he did. What he said didn't change the fact that it was all going very fast. But neither did my splitting hairs about the terminology.
"Well… I know how you hate to be single…" I said shakily. Nervous. After everything Isabelle had done to warn me of this moment, it felt like I was doing something wrong. Breaking a law. Not a big, go-to-prison law; one of those rules nobody follows. Like running across the road before the traffic light stops the cars.
But sometimes you're just ready to go and it doesn't seem that dangerous, anyway.
And the Angels knew I was ready.
Thank you for reading! I'm keeping my fingers crossed that this one goes down okay. I know there are a few of you in the 'give it more time' camp.
Thanks for your reviews, too. It was fun seeing how many of you had accurate predictions about the last chapter! The next one, 'Searching For Signals' is coming soon.
