Please be aware that some content of this chapter may be deemed M rated

Forty

Gem was upset at how the afternoon had finished so abruptly.

Time was precious with her Captain.

She was wrong to suggest a transfer to the Guard as tempting as it was to have him around on Coruscant.

Safe.

She felt physically sick.

She waited for a comm.

She sent two.

No answer.

She decided to head to the one place she thought he could be. She showered slowly and dressed thoughtfully, thinking of how he liked her to look.

A black asymmetrical dress that fell to the knee, her hair out loose and a heavy gold collar, the only jewellery she wore.

Alighting from the speeder cab on Level Thirteen, the fine black heels of her shoes clinked prettily on the stone pavement as she headed into the Republic Bar known colloquially to the troopers as The Bunker.

He wasn't there.

Looking around she quickly found a familiar face in Obi-Wan, drinking with his first in command, Cody.

"Gem, what a lovely surprise! Please join us. You've met Cody no doubt?"

The Commander stood and bowed his respect at the young dignitary from Oriis. "We've met briefly," she extended her hand and he shook it gently.

Cody smiled and wondered whether she had anything to do with the mood Rex was in earlier that afternoon.

She couldn't help but look past the two of them, scanning the bar quickly for any sign of him.

It wasn't lost on the soldier.

"Ben," she said, "I'm so glad you're home safe."

Rex had mentioned that he was on assignment with Kenobi.

"Please sit and allow me to get you a drink." Gem opened her mouth but before she could reply, he was gone lost amongst the sea of men, leaving her alone with his Commander at the small table.

"I don't believe I have seen the Captain here this evening," Cody said cautiously.

Gem swung around to meet his gaze.

He could sense her disappointment but now he could see it written all over her face.

"Ma'am, if I may -" he began when the General arrived back, interrupting him.

"Here we go. Cody, I took the liberty in getting you a refill."

"Thank you Sir."

They sat and to his credit, Ben played the perfect host.

He was indeed charming and reminisced about their childhood together, much to the delight of Cody, seeing his General in a completely different light.

Gem laughed for the first time that day and immediately forgot the tone of the earlier encounter with her lover.

"So is it hard keeping Ben alive?" She smiled, taking another sip of wine.

"No Ma'am, I think it's more that he keeps me alive," was his honest reply.

"It's a mutually beneficial arrangement isn't it Cody?"

"Yes Sir," he smiled in return.

Rex didn't show, but she did notice Fives and another Officer watching the three of them talking.

Fives looked bedraggled and surly, leaning into the bar drinking.

They were interrupted by another soldier slapping Cody hard on the back, causing him to spill some of his drink.

"Wolffe! Welcome back ner vod," Cody stood quickly and they clasped hands in the familiar soldier way and briefly touched foreheads. "What's brought you boys back into town?"

"We've got the penguins working on the main reactor of the Intrepid, HQ decided to give us 48 hours libo."

He was funny and had a lower voice than any other soldier she had met before. He turned around and shook Obi-Wan's extended hand.

"General. Good to see you Sir."

"Commander, may I introduce my," he stopped briefly then added, "my sister, Skylar Gem."

Gem stood and was immediately struck by the long scar running down the side of his face, catching his right eye on its trajectory. The eye itself was interesting, it was cybernetic.

"Is that an Optk-17?" She asked extending her hand to meet his, staring quizzically at his eye.

Wolffe was both shocked and embarrassed by her beauty looking at his scarred face and automatically stepped back slightly

"Yes Ma'am."

"My father invented that model!" she added all the time smiling.

"You must excuse my sister Wolffe. Her father was a scientist who developed cybernetics on Oriis."

"No harm Sir. I am pleased to finally meet you Ma'am. I believe you are familiar with my General, Master Koon.

"He and my mother were great friends once, Sir."

"It is true then that she was a Jedi and that you were once to train as one yourself?" His question seemed innocent enough.

"My mother was a Jedi," Gem smiled, "but I was never to train unlike Ben. I enjoy the company of others way too much to live such a solitary existence."

"Come now Gem," Obi-Wan interjected, "we don't live the lives of Monks. It's not so bad being a Jedi."

"But surely being allowed to have a healthy relationship would only enhance your sense of empathy and connection to the very people you are committed to serve." She was hinting at something more personal, and he knew where she was heading.

"We can have relationships Gem, just not get emotionally attached."

His voice raised a little in annoyance at her challenging him and questioning his faith.

Gem took a small sip of her wine and muffled "hypocrites," under her breath, just loud enough for the three to hear.

The comment didn't go unnoticed by the General.

"I think Gem," he said slowly, "you are coming from a certain viewpoint that this conversation will never be able to, unfortunately, satisfy."

Both Wolffe and Cody were enjoying watching the woman challenge the Jedi Master.

"We've never had this conversation Ben. How do you know it wouldn't be satisfying if we always avoid the topic?"

He sighed.

It was true, they had never openly discussed his opinion regarding her mother's demise from the Jedi Order.

"Gem," he softened, "your mother could never be a true Jedi living in emotional conflict.

There, he said it.

"Is that what you truly feel Ben, or just what you are trained to believe?"

Cody and Wolffe shifted uncomfortably.

"You can't be both Gem. You can't be a mother and a Jedi. It simply isn't done, and frankly I have had enough of this conversation." His voice had now become loud and she could tell he was getting angry.

Gem kept pushing.

"Why not?" Her tone matching his. "There are other orders that allow their members to have lasting and fulfilling emotional relationships, what was Yoda so afraid of? What's so special about your Order?"

Obi-Wan leaned back and rubbed his hand across his mouth. He was gradually losing control.

She never did know when to give up.

"Gem, your mother was a wonderful Jedi. However, the emotional dilemma of bearing a child and serving her Religion was always going to cause her inner conflict."

"A dilemma, so that's what I was. I don't understand? Why then did they take her back?"

"She had to be true to her calling Gem, her Faith in the Force was just too strong."

"Faith! It was her lack of Faith in her religion the end that caused her to take her own life. She was bullied into giving up her family Ben! The Order supported her in leaving her child but then turned their back on her at a time when she needed them the most. How is that possible?" She could feel her mouth involuntarily turn down as she struggled to keep her feelings under control.

"Would anyone like another drink?" Cody, tried hard to break up the unpleasant turn the discussion was taking.

"She made her choice Gem," Obi-Wan replied firmly.

"And what a choice they gave her. Here, come back to being a Jedi but forget the kid and the husband." Gem was bordering on hysteria. "And the unbelievable thing is, that they wanted me to join the Order! After everything they put her through, they still wanted me to train as a Jedi."

Several soldiers had stopped talking and were listening to the raised voices. Fives had also taken interest in the turn of events.

Watching closely from the bar.

"It was still her choice to leave Stewjon in the end, her choice to come back to Coruscant."

"She had no choice Ben, being a Jedi was all she knew."

"She did and we all know it."

"And what was it then, tell me! Give me some Jedi insight into what the true answer is," she challenged him again, pushing further and further.

That was it.

"You should never have been born!" Ben yelled back.

"Sir!" Cody stepped forward, placing himself slightly between his General and the woman.

A silence descended the room.

"I'm sorry Gem, I'm so sorry!" Obi-Wan was caught out by his emotions.

She quickly grabbed his right hand and placed it over her heart.

"I know," she looked at him nodding, "I know."

"Well, maybe I'll just get that round of drinks," Cody breathed out and headed towards the bar.

Gemma smiled at her brother and laughed, all for the benefit of the others in the room watching.

"This is why we have to have families Ben, who would we ever have those fractious conversations with?"

"You know I love you, don't you?"

"Of course I do Ben. Of course I do." She excused herself and headed towards the refreshers.

She avoided eye contact with anyone, tears beginning to spill down her cheeks. She dodged soldiers but managed to bump into one hard as she gathered speed down the stairs.

"Sorry," she said absently, looking up.

It was Fives.

She recognised him and stifled a cry in the back of her throat and continued on her way.

Not paying any attention to where she was heading, Gem grabbed a door handle and opened it, stepping through before realising the mistake she had made.

Instead of the door to the female refresher, she had opened and stepped out into the dark alley behind the club. She turned quickly but the heavy door had immediately shut behind her.

"Kriff," she muttered under her breath, wishing this day would just end.

#

"Have either of you seen Gem?" Obi-Wan asked Wolffe and Cody. The men had decided to call it a night and began to collect their helmets to leave and board the shuttle back to the barracks.

"No Sir. Would you want us to take a look around?"

"No, no need,' he said vaguely, "she's probably gone back to the Senate building, I'll head there and check."

The two commanders looked at one another and downed their drinks.

"You check the 'freshers and I'll do a sweep of the bar." Wolffe said as he got up from his chair.

Cody passed Fives and gave him a gauged nod, still angry about the fight earlier that afternoon with the Captain. This was turning into a particularly tiring day.

"You see the young Representative pass here before?" he asked the ARC.

"As a matter of fact I did Sir, she wasn't too happy either."

"Did you notice which way she went?"

"'Freshers I'd say, but I haven't seen her since. I'll check again if you like?" Cody grunted acknowledgment, turned around and headed back up to meet Wolffe.

Fives headed down the stairs and belted on the ladies room with his fist.

"Gem, Skylar Gem are you in there?"

Several women, one a Twi'lek he knew quite well opened the door and came out.

"Nobody in here but us handsome," she said running her hand under his chin.

Fives smiled, had it been a better day he probably would have taken her back to the bar for a drink. He turned and noticed the exit door and stopped, looking at it again.

She wouldn't have gone out there?

Would she?

Thinking like an ARC he decided to have a quick look around the perimeter. Cody was probably right, she would have headed home with her tail between her legs from the earlier altercation with the General, but in all honesty, he couldn't dismiss the nagging feeling that maybe, just maybe she went out here by mistake.

And like a true ARC, he was right.

#

"Kriff Gem, you OK?"

She was on the ground on all fours. She was dazed, and couldn't focus on him when he knelt down beside her. A small trickle of blood was travelling slowly down her forehead as Fives gently pulled her up from the ground. Gem's legs gave way from under her, the gold collar gone.

"Come on, you need to see a doctor." Fives looked around and noticed movement to his left, he didn't have a weapon other than his hands, which were fully occupied at the time and felt uncomfortably vulnerable. Walking quickly he headed towards the front of the bar and hailed a speeder taxi where he placed her gently in the back seat.

"Nearest hospital," he ordered the driver as he sat next to her.

#

It was twenty three forty five when he managed to get back to the barracks. He walked the familiar corridors until he stood outside the same door he had done only hours earlier. With a sigh, he pressed the buzzer for a second time that day.

Rex wasn't startled, he was used to his sleep being interrupted, but was more annoyed when he saw who was standing there as the door opened.

"You come back for another go?"

"Shut your stupid face and come with me." Fives was annoyed and tired as well.

"I swear soldier if - ," Rex began.

"Give it a rest will you, it's Gemma you di'kut."

Rex's eyes glanced at Fives chest plate and noticed the blood. He quickly returned into his room to grab a top and boots.

They walked with speed and in silence through the Military compound and into the Senatorial building.

"She was down at The Bunker, probably looking for you. She had a fight with Kenobi and ended up lost on Thirteen and mugged. She has concussion."

The doors of her apartment hissed open and Rex walked straight through to the woman's bedroom.

"Yeah, thanks and all that," Fives muttered under his breath, turning to retrace the steps they had just taken.

Rex allowed his eyes to adjust to the muted light and made out the woman lying on the bed, still dressed in the black dress. He could clearly see the white Bacta bandage on her head and moved quietly to her side.

"Gem, it's me."

"Rex,' she was groggy and his heart sank at the sound of her fragile voice.

"Gemma, you should be in Bacta, concussion can be healed in an hour. Come on, lets' go and see Kix."

"No, it's OK, no Bacta Rex, please."

"I don't understand, they should have just put you in it at the hospital," he said, his voice raising at the idiocy of the medical professional and Fives for not insisting it.

It was Gem who had agreed with the doctor at the public hospital on Level Twelve that she should in fact, avoid the Bacta. It accelerated healing yes, but even the medical profession didn't know the effect it would have on a nine week old foetus.

#

He was in no mood to head back to the Barracks again that evening and definitely in no mood for caf and conversation with his brothers.

There was only one thing that could take the edge off, and only one person who could sate the restlessness growing inside him.

He headed out of the Senate Building and immediately sought a ride.

Arriving at the expensive looking apartment building Fives entered and decided against the elevator, taking the stairs instead, he climbed two at a time, effortlessly making his way to the ninth floor before checking the hallway for any activity.

It was an old habit, but it had kept him alive up 'til now.

It was late. He made his way to the door with the Basic numbers 961A written on it.

He pressed an ear against it and listened.

Two voices, one female the other male.

Banging loudly on the door he shouted. "Tash, open up."

Continuing his relentless pursuit, "Tash, it's Fives, open the kriffing door!"

He heard the latches being worked and waited against the wall.

She was furious.

"What the fek do you want?" she hissed, looking back behind her nervously.

Fives stormed past her into the luxurious apartment.

"Fives, I didn't say you could come in!"

"Natasha, is there a problem?" The male sitting on the couch holding a glass of wine stood up and watched the entrance of the ARC in full armour.

"It's a clone!" He sounded shocked at the soldier's presence.

At that comment, Fives turned slowly around and moved slightly towards the man in the Coruscanti business suit before he said menacingly, "get out."

"Natasha? What's going on?" he asked the woman again.

"It might be best if you leave. I'll call you in the morning." She motioned him towards the door.

"I don't like leaving you here alone with him," he sneered, intonating his head towards the soldier.

"Usen'ye! Slana'pir di'kut!" Fives roared.

He turned and grabbed his coat off the chair beside him and headed towards the woman.

"I can call the Guard if you like?"

"It's OK Birch. I'll be fine. He's a patient of mine."

She put her hand on the man's arm and knowing full well Fives was watching, she leaned in and kissed her suitor passionately on the mouth. He moved away smiling, and looking back at the figure in white as he closed the door behind him.

"Was that really necessary?" Fives questioned, raising an eyebrow.

"You just can't barge in here when you're on leave and expect me to drop everything Fives," she yelled back.

He moved towards her.

"Don't. Don't come any closer! And take that shabla thing off!" Jerking her head and indicating his helmet. Tash turned and stepped further into her own residence. She took him in, huge, formidable in the armour, her heart racing uncontrollably under her silk top, her cheeks flushed with rage.

Fives did as she requested.

Breaking the seal he lifted his bucket off. He knew he had pushed it this time. He could see just how angry she was at having her evening interrupted.

It just fuelled his lust further.

She looked good, dressed in a simple black skirt and blouse. He golden hair tied neatly at the back of her head in an elaborate bun. Red lipstick, and fragrance, yes, he had missed the way she smelled. There was nothing like it in the whole universe, it was unique to her.

He looked up from under his brow as he brought the bucket down on the table next to the empty wine glass.

"Look at you. You've been in another fight haven't you?"

The bruising from the beating in the gym at the hands of his Captain was becoming more evident as the hours passed.

He moved towards her.

"No! Don't you dare!" she glared at him.

He ignored her warning as he pushed her up against the wall and pinned her against his body.

"Fives, I can't keep doing this," her voice trembling.

"Doing exactly what Tash?" His lips began to nuzzle her neck as his hips ground against her prone body. He separated her legs with his own and continued to gratify himself at her expense.

A loud breath escaped her mouth.

She was unable to move, held against the wall she could feel pieces of his armour against her delicate skin, and she flushed at how good it felt.

It was always this way with him.

He pulled back and looked into her eyes, her lids heavy with passion and with menace in his own he sought her mouth and kissed her roughly.

She responded by winding her arms around his neck.

Tash moaned into his mouth as he quickly sought out the material between her legs. The delicate fabric stood no chance against his nimble fingers as he deftly lost two into her.

"Argh!" She gasped at the invasion and he pulled back slightly at the sound.

"No?" he questioned, his eyes sparkling.

"Yes," she whispered back, and a broad perfect smile escaped his lips.

She wanted him, he knew it, and with the green light given, he lost all control.

They recoiled against the wall, fumbling and panting as they moved towards the couch. Fives removing pieces of armour as they twirled, dancing further and further towards the inevitable.

He pushed her into the back of the couch and with the essential pieces of his armour removed he pulled her skirt up to her waist. He was thrilled at the sight. Suspendered black stockings with matching black lace underwear.

"Really Tash, you needn't have gone to so much trouble," he smirked.

Flipping her around, he pushed her forward and pulled the offending item of underwear aside and moved into her from behind

"You bastard Fives," she breathed out as he continued to press her into the couch.

Feeling her pulsing begin only magnified his craving further. Faster and faster he moved against her until he too, cried out her name and slumped against her back.

Then silence.

Breathing hard, she waited for him to release her before she turned around. She looked up into his eyes, he avoided her gaze, looking away as she pulled her underwear back in place and readjusted her skirt.

She knew this behaviour well.

It was Fives Modus operandi.

Tash sighed and placed a hand gently on his shoulder.

"Want some caf?"

"Thanks," he responded as he supported his weight against the couch. "Mind if I stay tonight?"

She stopped and replied, "you know where the bedroom is," secretly smiling as she placed two mugs down on the counter top.

#

"I'm sorry Tash."

She had changed out of her clothes and was wearing a floppy oversized shirt, her hair cascading over her shoulders.

Sitting up in the large bed surrounded by pillows, Fives had eaten some food and had two large mugs of caf.

She crawled in next to him.

"Want to talk about your face?"

He rubbed a hand over his head. "Not really. What I do want to talk about is us."

She scoffed at the remark. "There is no us Fives. You arrive, we have sex, you leave. It's what we do."

"What if we did more?" Fives turned to look at her, "that is, if you want to be seen with a clone."

He averted his eyes.

Tash had never seen him like this before. He never wanted anything more than what they had.

"You really are an or'dinii you know?"

"You're Mando'a is getting better."

He turned his face towards her and there they sat looking at one another, silent and wary.

"Look Tash, maybe I should get back and -" he began and started to pull the blanket aside.

"No, don't go. Stay." Tash spoke softly, "I do want more Fives. I always have."

He leaned forward and kissed her lightly on the mouth. She settled back against his shoulder.

"Tell me soldier boy. What's been happening?"

Fives took a long breath and began. He told her about Freya, the mission to the Citadel and the death of his best friend.

And she sat there, ensconced in the crook of his shoulder, and listened.

#