I woke up in a complete and utter daze. I forgot where I was and what had happened, just long enough to have a moment of bliss before the rude awakening hit me. The shooting, the med closet, and Callie. Oh, Callie.

I looked to my right and she was gone. The alarm clock next to the bed read 8:46AM. I can't believe I had slept so long; we usually were at the hospital by 5:00AM. I ran my hand through my hair, assessing the grossness of it, realizing that should be the very least of my concerns at this time. Then I heard a shower starting. I looked over, and the bathroom door was cracked open, just ever so slightly. Enough for me to see that Callie was standing just in front of the shower door, naked. I closed my eyes, embarrassed for her, trying to maintain her modesty. But I gave up on that after a moment or two, and saw her step into the shower. It was a beautiful shower, the entire floor and walls were a light grey tile. The showerhead was huge and hung from the ceiling. There were flowers in the windowsill. And my favorite part, the shower doors were glass.

I sat there for a moment, just watching her. She was just standing under the water, not moving. I wondered why she didn't shut the bathroom door, why it was left open just a crack, enough for me to see. Was it an invitation? Or just a simple mistake?

I don't know what came over me, but suddenly, I was walking to the door. But I paused. This is fucking crazy, I thought. She is vulnerable, scared and sad. Even more than that, she is MARRIED. She is in a heterosexual relationship. I can't do this. I absolutely cannot do this.

Just as I was about to walk away, I realized I was never really going to walk away. I was in too deep. I love her. I have loved her since the day I met her. I wish I could erase that feeling. But I can't. Last night, was horrible but at the same time, completely amazing. She touched me; she initiated this. I can't ignore that. I don't want to ignore that.

I walked into the bathroom. I took off my clothes, layer by layer, until I was completely naked and staring at her. I knew she had heard me come in, but she didn't turn around. She had her back to me, her forehead against the tile walls, just letting the water fall down her back. She looked completely stunning. I felt like I was going to throw up I was so nervous, but I opened the shower door anyway. Still, she didn't move. I let the warm water wash over my body and through my hair. I took a step, and was now millimeters from her back. Still, she refused to turn around, like she was ignoring me. But she didn't move, she didn't say no, she didn't scream in surprise. She wanted me there; that much I was sure of. She just didn't know how to want me there. I put my hands on her waist and felt her quiver.

"Look at me Callie" I whispered in her ear. She dropped her head a little further, then slowly turned to me. We were facing each other, water pouring over us as we were directly under the showerhead. I lifted her head with my finger, forcing her to make eye contact with me. Once we did, I felt the mutual acknowledgement between us that these, our feelings, were completely real. They could no longer be ignored, or brushed off. And we were about to physically make our feelings known.

"Oh Arizona" She sighed, resting her forehead on mine.

"Calliope" I whispered, closing my eyes. Our hands were entwined, my thumb stroking her hand. I felt her lift her head, just enough to align our lips. I felt her breath against my lips.

"Kiss me" I said. She put one hand at the base of my neck, and slowly, our lips met for the first time. We kissed slowly, navigating the waters of this incredibly new dimension of our relationship. She had a fistful of my hair and I rested my hands on her face. After a few seconds, she pulled away and took a step back. I took a moment to just stare at her. Her perfectly rounded breasts, her curvaceous figure, her stunning eyes and perfect, caramel colored skin. I could never have resisted her. I backed her into the wall, putting our hands straight up against the wall, so she couldn't withstand me.

She looked me in the eye, "I'm scared Arizona"

"Me too" I said. I began kissing her neck and I heard a small moan escape her lips.

"I have never done his before…with a woman" She confessed.

"Me neither, not like this, anyway" I said, ending my sentence with a kiss on her forehead.

"What are we going to do?" She asked quietly, a tear running down her face. I rested my forehead on hers, letting her arms fall to my waist. She pulled me close.

"I don't know" I whispered, "But I am here, now. I am with you. And I am not going anywhere."

She let a small sob escape. I kissed her, harder this time, and the sob resolved. I drew away from her slowly and sat down on a small bench towards the back of the shower, water still raining down on us. I grabbed her hands and pulled her into me. She stood and I wrapped my arms around her waist, slowly kissing her stomach. She had her arms around my neck, soft moans leaving her lips as I inched my way up her torso. I lifted my head briefly, and pulled her down so she was strattling me. Our clits grazed briefly, and we both gasped. With her sitting on my lap facing me, I began suckling each nipple slowly. I let my tongue roam her areola, my hands wandering to her ass, giving it the occasional squeeze. She placed her hands on my breasts, unsure of herself.

"It's ok" I said, putting a strand of hair behind her ear, "Do what feels right". She smiled and kissed me deeply, her tongue tracing my teeth. I squeezed her ass again, and she shifted her pelvis closed to mine, enough to make contact. She then wedged her right hand between us and she palmed my crotch. I moaned and pulled her closer. She looked so beautiful, soaking wet on top of me, her long black hair running down her back. Without moving her hand, I shifted her onto my left leg. I moved her back and forth, pleasuring her with the simple skin-to-skin contact. She threw her head back, breasts bouncing slightly as we moved. She rubbed my clit harder with her palm. We moved in sync for a few minutes, until she stopped, suddenly breathless.

"Arizona, I am so close" she said, shifting herself back so she was sitting between my legs again.

"I know Calliope" I could feel my own juices coating my legs. She leaned down and began kissing my neck. She leaned towards my ear, biting my earlobe.

"I want you inside of me, the first time" She admitted bashfully. I pulled her face towards me and kissed her softly.

"Take me to bed, Callie".

We didn't even bother turning off the shower or drying off. She took my hand and led me out of the shower. I picked her up, her legs wrapped around my torso and laid her onto the bed. Her raven black hair splayed across the pillow. She was absolutely glowing. I climbed onto the bed, her knees were loosely together, as if she was hiding herself from me. I hovered over her, my wet hair dripping onto her chest.

"Are you ready?" I asked. She nodded, pulling me down by the ass. It felt so good to be on top of her, to feel her warmth. I slowly crept up to the kneeling position and spread her legs. I could see her bud, swollen with anticipation. I kissed her inner thighs, making my way towards her mound. When I finally kissed her bud, she trembled. Smiling, I kissed her soft lips and slowly, entered two fingers into her. I felt her walls tighten around my fingers and began a rhythmic pace. She met my rhythm with thrusts of her hips. I quickly began rubbing her clitoris with my available thumb.

"Oh my god, Arizona" she moaned.

I quickened my rhythm, feeling her walls begin to contract. She grabbed my ass, squeezing it to the point it was almost painful. I curled my fingers inside of her and accelerated the thumb speed on her clitoris. She thrusted once more and then felt her walls quiver, releasing my fingers from their grip. Her entire body relaxed, and I removed myself from her. When I fell beside her, I couldn't help but smile. Because all the terribleness of yesterday melted away, just for those few moments, and I allowed myself to fall into her.