Disclaimer: I don't own Yu-Gi-Oh! which is one of my deepest life regrets.

"Secrets are like plants.

They can stay buried deep in the earth for a long time, but eventually they'll send up shoots and give themselves away.

They have to. It's their nature.

Just a tiny green stem at first. Which slowly, insidiously grows taller, stronger, unfolding itself, until there it is.

A big fat secret, right in front of your face; a fully bloomed flower perfumed with the scent of deception."

― Judy Reene Singer, Still Life With Elephant

Chapter 12

He was standing in Kam, leader of Robinhood's office. Mokuba was lying in the corner, his arms duct-taped behind his back, his ankles taped together, and another piece of tape over his mouth.

"Maybe you aren't useless after all," Kam noted, and Darren, clad in a camouflage-colored uniform, clapped Alistair on the shoulder.

"What are you talking about?" Alistair demanded. Kam snapped his fingers, and Pegasus and Siegfried von Schroeder walked in the door behind them, dragging Seto along with them. Seto quickly took in the scene.

"Mokuba!" he said, struggling against Pegasus and Siegfried's strong grip on his upper arms. "Mokuba!" His gaze shifted to Alistair. "You promised that you'd keep him safe!" Before Alistair could reply, Kam spoke for him.

"Keep him safe? You're naïve Seto Kaiba. Alistair's orders were to bring him to us."

"What?" Seto's eyes widened in shock.

"No, Seto, that's not true," Alistair said quickly. "I didn't know!"

"You liar!" Seto shouted, trying to wrench himself from his captors' grasp. "Liar!"

"Alistair, wake up!" Alistair sat up so quickly that he almost head butted Seto on accident. His heart was racing and he felt a drop of sweat roll down the side of his face.

"It was just a nightmare," Seto said reassuringly. "It wasn't real. Was it about your brother again?" he asked after a pause while Alistair continued to completely pull himself out of the dream.

"No. It was about Mokuba. I was supposed to keep him safe, but I couldn't."

"You would never let anything bad happen to him any more than I would. Now come on, get a hold of yourself and go back to sleep." Still shaken, Alistair lay back down and Seto pulled him against his chest like he always did when the redhead had a nightmare, knowing full well that he couldn't really protect him from the things he saw in his dreams.

Even though he knew it was irrational, it was with a great sense of foreboding that Alistair said goodbye to Seto the next morning as the brunette left for work and his meeting with Britney.

Shaking off Alistair's strange behavior, Seto tried to focus on putting up his usual mental defenses. Given the very personal nature of Britney Whinnery's accusations, he had no doubt that she would try to say things to rile him up and he needed to make sure that she couldn't.

He met Roland at his office door.

"Are you ready, sir?" Roland asked.

"Of course." Seto's posture was perfect, not a hair was out of place, his mouth was a thin line, but he didn't appear to be anything less than self-assured; the picture of confidence; the image of Seto Kaiba that everyone had come to expect.

"We've heard from her laywer," Roland filled him in. "Apparently it's her father. He's a prosecutor, but his record is spotty at best. I don't think it's anything to worry about."

"It wouldn't matter even if he was top-notch; we aren't doing anything underhanded; just having a friendly chat. Besides, even if for some reason they chose to prosecute us; they wouldn't win. And who's the 'friend' she's bringing with her? Her boyfriend?"

"Presumably. His name is Darren Wiley. He was an art student at Domino U who graduated along with Miss Whinnery this last spring. He's credited on her website as being a research assistant for her exposés."

"Fine. I'm slated to meet with them after lunch in the board room, correct?" Roland nodded. "Good. Alert me when Mr. Uedo arrives. Until then, I'll be in my office."

"Yessir."

Seto spent the morning idly answering emails and reading memos. He had Valarie send Momo Tojikamuri a formal email to enlist her to travel to San Francisco's Kaiba Land and even had a moment to rearrange the trophies lining the walls. He was pumped full of confidence induced adrenaline the likes of which he hadn't felt since before his duel with Yugi at his duel dome. Unlike that time, there were no ancient spirits to get in his way which put his chances of success at close to one hundred percent. The knowledge that he was about to win a battle of wits without even breaking a sweat was utterly intoxicating and it took more willpower than he would have expected to keep a self-satisfied smirk off his face when he entered the board room.

He gaze swept over the small group of people and finally stopped on Britney Whinnery; the only woman in the room. She was shorter than he'd been picturing and much more meek looking with glasses and cornrows with beads entwined in the braids. She was wearing a salmon colored pants suit and nervously clutching onto a stack of papers. He could break her easily. Next he appraised her boyfriend, Darren Wiley, taking in his unshaven face, ponytail, and earring. He put Seto in mind of the kind of person Joey Wheeler would hang out with, meaning he would probably talk a big talk, but no one would take it seriously—Seto included. As for the girls' father, he was wearing a suit that was too big in the shoulder which told Seto all that he felt he needed to know.

The moment that he stepped into the room, everyone's eyes turned to him. He saw Britney take a deep breath, Darren curl his lip up slightly, and Uedo snap to attention. He sat at the head of the table with his lawyer and Roland hovering nearby.

"Please, take a seat," he said with palpably artificial hospitality. Darren, Britney, and her father all sat down. After sending Roland off to meet with the financial division manager on his behalf he began to speak.

"First off, I wanted to thank you all for coming here today," he started. "You, Miss Whinnery, have achieved something that no other journalist has managed before, which is to say, you have gotten my attention, so congratulations." She smiled awkwardly while next to her Darren began to glare at him, looking like he wanted to say something scathing. "The concerns you raised have not fallen on deaf ears. I agree with the points you raised and have been taking steps to makes some changes in several of our policies. Policies that are, as I'm sure you would agree, old fashioned and outdated, just like the previous owner of this company." Unable to do anything else, she nodded while Darren continued to not so subtly gnash his teeth. By this point Seto was completely in his element. He loved getting under people's skin by way of being pleasantly unpleasant (though he loathed it when others, namely Pegasus, did that to him). "This Thursday I'm planning on holding a press conference, and I asked you here today to invite you to interview me since you're the one that raised such an interest in my company. Before you say anything, know that we are prepared to compensate you." He snapped his fingers and Uedo took a white envelope off the clipboard he'd been holding and handed it to Seto who slid it across the table to Britney.

Unsure what else to do, she opened the envelope and removed a check. Her eyes widened and Darren and her father looked over each of her shoulders to read the number written on the paper. Britney started to say something, but her father cut her off.

"I need a moment to discuss this with my daughter," he said firmly, taking the check from her and placing it back on the table.

"By all means," Seto said graciously. "My lawyer can go with you to answer any questions you may have." The three of them got up to have a quick powwow in the hallway, leaving Darren and Seto seated at the table. "Your girlfriend is quite extraordinary," he told the scruffy man politely, a smirk playing around his mouth.

"She's not my girlfriend, but she is extraordinary," Darren replied, trying to keep his anger in check, knowing that if he decked Kaiba all hell would break loose. What made the whole thing worse was that he knew that Kaiba knew exactly how annoying he was being and was doing it precisely to get a rise out of him. What did Alistair see in Seto Kaiba that he found so redeeming? All Darren could assume was that Alistair just liked him because he was rich and handsome, but had tricked himself into thinking it was more than that.

Up close, Darren was unable to ignore Kaiba's undeniable beauty, but as much as he wouldn't mind having sex with him, possibly more than once, he also wanted to wipe the cocky smirk off his face with his fist.

"Oh, well if you're not her boyfriend, it's quite nice of you to come and support her in her moment of triumph."

"Her boyfriend had a class today, so he couldn't be here."

"That's too bad." Darren decided he couldn't handle Kaiba's smug smile any longer, and narrowing his eyes and trying to match the expression he said:

"And where's your boyfriend?" Seto's smirk disappeared.

"What did you just say to me?" he asked angrily.

"Since we were having a polite conversation, I simply asked you, since you asked about Britney, why your boyfriend isn't here to support you. Is he too busy saving the world?" Seto frowned.

"I dare you to say that with my lawyer in the room; you'd be finished. You're already finished."

"Am I? I don't feel very finished. Look: I know that you're planning something. I don't know what it is, but you're not going to get away with making Britney look like a fool just because you're a sore loser. She didn't want to use this against you because she says that you're 'one of us.' But you're not. You're a greedy, selfish brat who's used to getting everything he wants. Well not this time. If you try to pull anything funny, I will tell everyone about Alistair." To Darren's astonishment, though Seto looked surprised, he didn't seem as upset as he would have expected.

"I don't know how you know about him," he started, "but let me let you in on a little secret: I was going to tell everyone anyway. So if you do, even though it wouldn't be nearly as effective as I would have hoped, it wouldn't hurt me. In fact: it would help me get your little magazine on my side." Furious, Darren said:

"Oh yeah? Well how would your shareholders feel if they knew that their corporate executive officer was still working through an emo phase?" Seto suddenly felt as though a weight had dropped into his stomach.

"What?" Sensing that finally he had said something that made Kaiba nervous, Darren continued.

"I bet they'd be very interested to know why you never wear short sleeves."

"I don't know what you're talking about." But even as he said it, the leaden weight that had settled in his gut seemed to increase. Seto was positive that no one knew about the scars on his wrist except Alistair which meant that there was no way that this street punk could have found out about them unless Alistair had told him.

"Sure you do." Darren knew that if he revealed his source of information he'd probably ruin Alistair's relationship with Kaiba and maybe even get him into legal trouble, but the redhead had made his bed by choosing Kaiba, and now he was going to have to lie in it. "Alistair told me all about how he caught you cutting your wrist, and he also said that that wasn't the first time you'd done it." It was as though Darren had kicked him in the stomach. That couldn't be…Alistair wouldn't do that to him…This had to be some kind of trick!

Seto stood up abruptly, feeling suddenly sick to his stomach, and without a word he left the office, pushing past Uedo, Britney, and her father, ignoring their noises of surprise, and didn't stop walking until he'd reached the nearest bathroom which was mercifully empty and threw up in the toilet.

Alistair had been in on it from the beginning. He'd merely been pretending to be concerned when really he'd been feeding his friends information about him. How long had that been going on? Since before the redhead had gone to work for Robinhood? Since Seto had taken him in?

It suddenly occurred to him that this could have been Alistair's plan all along. He'd never forgiven Seto or stopped hating him. It had been his plan to gain Seto's trust so that he could take down Kaiba Corp and exact his revenge.

Thinking about all the nights that he'd slept in the same bed as someone who was trying to ruin him, about kissing him, and having sex with him caused Seto to throw up again. This was beyond betrayal, though he couldn't think of a stronger word. Had Alistair really been laughing at him the whole time?

As the minutes wore on, Seto's feelings of betrayal turned into red hot anger. How dare Alistair do this to him after everything he had done for him? Without Seto, Alistair would have had nothing. Without Seto he might even have died, so what right did he have to hate him so much?

He stood up, flushed the toilet, and washed his face at the sink. Alistair would pay for this, and pay dearly.

Alistair was sitting at the desktop in his room working through yet another practice calculus exam when he heard a car pull into the driveway. Getting up and looking out the window he saw with some surprise that it was Seto. That was fast, he thought to himself. He hadn't expected Seto to get home until much later.

He made his way to the foyer to meet Seto when he got there and almost bumped into Mokuba, who apparently had had the same idea. They exchanged a look, both hoping that the meeting had gone well.

Seto had spent his entire drive back to the mansion ignoring his vibrating cell phone and trying to figure out what to say to Alistair. He in no way wanted to give Alistair the satisfaction of knowing how deeply his treachery had cut Seto, not on an emotional level. As he got out of his car, still burning with anger, his cell phone buzzing in his pocket, he tried to compose himself. Any hope he had of that was shattered when he opened the door only to see Alistair and Mokuba standing there waiting for him.

As soon as Seto opened the door, it was clear to Alistair and Mokuba that something had gone wrong. When Seto laid eyes on Alistair's face, on the features he had become so accustomed to, features that were currently wearing a mask of concern, all of the cocky, unconcerned remarks he'd thought up on his drive were forgotten. All that remained were the feelings of complete and utter betrayal.

"What happened?" Mokuba asked. Seto ignored him. Looking directly into Alistair's silver eyes he said:

"I never thought that it would be possible for me to hate someone as much as I hated my step-father." It took every ounce of self-control he possessed to keep his voice from shaking. Mokuba's mouth fell open in surprise and confusion, but Alistair thought he knew what Seto was talking about. Clearly Britney had not kept her promise.

"I can explain," he started. Seto cut him off.

"Don't bother. I don't want to hear any more of your lies."

"Seto-,"

"You have no right to call me that!" Seto shouted, the sudden outburst causing Mokuba to jump. "I know who you see when you look at me! You were better off calling me Kaiba!"

"It was a mistake!" Alistair said loudly, angry that Seto wouldn't even give him the chance to explain.

"Oh I'm sure," Seto snapped sarcastically. "Just a misunderstanding, right?" He clenched his fists. "I take back what I said before. I hate you more than I ever hated him. He was a snake, so the hell he put me through was to be expected, but you, you had no reason to do this to me!" Mokuba had never seen his brother so upset before. "Congratulations: you win! You finally get the two things that you always wanted: you've fucked over my company, and you've fucked me! I hope you're satisfied." He started to walk past the redhead, loathe though he was to do so, but Alistair stood firm. "Get out of my way!"

"Listen to me," Alistair said, his voice rising in desperation. "I know what you think, but you're wrong!"

"Spare me! Your little boyfriend Darren Wiley told me everything. That's who you were with this weekend, wasn't it? Were the two of you at a club together celebrating, or did you just have a quiet evening at home laughing at what a fool you think I am? Is that what you've been doing the entire time you've been living here? Actually, I don't care.I am not a fool, and you aren't going to pull one over on me twice. Now get out of my house!"

"Seto!"

"Get out!" He shoved Alistair backwards and stalked past him, his trench coat, as always, swishing dramatically behind him. But unlike most times, this was no victory.

Hurt but angry, Alistair set his jaw and stormed out the open door, into the garage, and without so much as a jacket, he shoved his helmet on, aggressively turned the key that was always at the ready in the ignition, and took off down the driveway, slowing down just long enough for a startled Kanzo to open the gates.

Mokuba, feeling shell-shocked by the ferocity of the fight could only stand rooted to the spot until his cell phone started ringing. He didn't answer it, but the sudden noise was enough for him to unfreeze and chase after his brother.

"Seto!" he called, running up the stairs. "Seto!" He reached his brother's closed door and turned the handle, but it was locked. "Seto!" he called a third time, banging on the door. "What happened? Let me in!"

On the other side of the door, Seto was sitting on his bed with his head in his hands, his breathing shaky. He couldn't tell if he was trying to cry or trying not to. His cell phone started buzzing again. He yanked it out of his jacket pocket and hurled it against the wall where it shattered, the pieces falling to the floor. It was the perfect metaphor.

Mokuba heard the noise and redoubled his knocking.

"Seto!" He started to cry. "Seto…" He sank to the ground outside the door and hugged his knees, his tears falling onto his jeans. He was badly frightened. Nothing had ever had this effect on his brother before except the mind crush the pharaoh had inflicted on him after their first match. But that had been magic whereas this had been caused by something inside of Seto and that was what scared him. Even Gozaburo had not succeeded in causing the expression that Mokuba had just seen on his brother's face.

When he'd taken off, Alistair had had no plan in mind, no destination.

He wasn't sure who he was the angriest with: himself for having told Darren in the first place, Darren for telling Britney when he'd promised not to tell anyone, Britney for presumably telling Seto, or Seto for refusing to hear him out which probably would have resolved the whole thing.

He finally decided that while he himself was certainly the one to blame for setting the entire chain of events in motion, Seto was the one he was most angry with.

How dare he just throw away the last year like that? How could he believe that all this time it had all been a sham? Did he honestly believe that Alistair was that good of an actor after insisting for months that the redhead couldn't possibly lie without him knowing? Did he really think that he had never loved him? That he didn't love him still?

Suddenly he wasn't angry anymore, just sad. This was it; he was never going to be able to go back to how things were that morning when he had woken up with Seto's arms around him. His carelessness and Seto's hyper-sensitivity had ruined that.

Despite the gloom that settled over him, Alistair couldn't cry. For one thing, he was driving, and for another, it hadn't really sunken in yet. A part of him hoped that this would just be another one of their many fights that he'd stomped away from. Around dinnertime he'd drive back and without saying anything they'd look at each other and know that they'd each been forgiven.

He drove aimlessly around the city until he noticed that he was almost out of gas. He pulled into a gas station only to discover that he didn't have his wallet with him. Suddenly panicking, he dragged his bike off to the side to assess what he did have.

Not much as it turned out. He had his helmet, his keys, his cell phone, and a couple of coins. Opening the compartment on his motorcycle, he saw that he also had his insurance and registration papers, but not his license, though he did have a small stash of money, enough to cover half a tank of gas. Cursing, he tried to figure out what to do. Finally, he decided to call Mokuba.

Mokuba, who was still sitting on the floor across the hall from Seto's door, waiting for him to come out, had finally called Roland back, telling him simply that Seto wasn't feeling well, a statement he could tell Roland didn't completely believe.

He was thinking about knocking on the door again when his cell phone started ringing. Wearily, he checked the caller ID and saw that it was Alistair. Suddenly angry, he answered.

"What do you want?" he snapped.

"Can you just let me explain what happened?" Alistair pleaded.

"Fine."

"Months ago I used to hang out with this guy, Darren, before your brother and I were…before I cared about him, and I sometimes vented to Darren about certain things, but I didn't tell him it was Seto I was talking about; he figured that out on his own, and when he did I made him promise not to tell anyone. And that was it. I haven't even talked to him since before I left to work for Robinhood, I swear! I went to look for him this weekend to make sure he'd keep his promise, but I couldn't find him. I emailed Britney, his old roommate, and she swore she wouldn't tell, but obviously she did."

"I don't know…." Mokuba wasn't sure whether to believe the redhead's story or not. Alistair certainly knew how to act; he'd proven that by successfully pretending to be Pegasus. Could it be that he was lying so that he could…what? If Seto was right, wouldn't Alistair have already gotten what he wanted? Why would he continue to deny it? That hadn't been his style when he'd gone after Seto in the first place; he'd proudly declared his motivation once Seto had realized that it wasn't Pegasus he was dueling. That led Mokuba to believe that he was telling the truth.

"I'm not lying," Alistair insisted.

"He's really mad at you, Alistair," Mokuba said finally.

From behind his closed door, Seto heard Mokuba say Alistair's name. He worked up enough energy to get up off the bed and unlock the door. He wrenched it open.

"Seto!" Ignoring his brother, Seto snatched the teen's phone from him.

"Alistair!" he growled, his blue eyes blazing. "Don't you dare try to use Mokuba to get to me! I can't believe even you would sink that low. Never call here again! I don't want to see you, I don't want to hear from you! You're nothing but a snake, and if you ever have the misfortune of crossing me again I will dispose of you like one, do you understand me? You are the most despicable person I've ever had the misfortune to meet and I wish I'd left you on that plane to die!" He aggressively pressed the end button and tossed the phone to Mokuba before sweeping back into his room, slamming and locking the door behind him.

"Seto!" Mokuba started up banging on the door again. "I think he was telling the truth!"

But Seto couldn't bring himself to answer. That final outburst had sapped the last of his strength. He realized that he meant what he had said: he really did regret rescuing Alistair from the plane wreck. Now he had had a taste of happiness only to have it violently snatched away. It wasn't fair.

Whatever idiot had said that it was better to have loved and lost than never to have loved at all was completely wrong. If he had never fallen in love with Alistair he wouldn't be here now. He'd be at work completely free of the acute pain that was now working its way into his chest.

He fell backwards onto the bed and stared at the ceiling. Gozaburo had been right all along: the only person you can trust is yourself. Friendship and love were only for those who hadn't figured that out yet.

Without warning, the events of the past year began playing like some horrible slide-show, gradually going faster and faster until he rolled over and pressed his face into the sheets to escape them.

Something began digging into his chest. It was his locket. As soon as he realized that that was what it was, it suddenly felt far too heavy. He sat up and with one yank, he broke the cord and threw the whole thing across the room where it landed on the floor next to the pieces of his cell phone.

The first tears landed on the crimson covers, covers that were still messy from when he and Alistair had slept between them and woken up together amongst them that morning. Seto stared at them until his vision started blurring. That was when he started crying for real. All of the feelings of betrayal he'd ever felt, all the abuse, all the hurt, all of it came bubbling to the surface and spilled over until he was sobbing into the mattress. He clutched onto the sheets as though that would somehow bring him comfort. Comfort akin to that which he'd provided to Mokuba and to Alistair when they'd been upset. Where was his shoulder to cry on?

You don't deserve it; you're worthless. Pathetic. No one cares about you. No one ever did. You're nothing more than the means everyone uses for their own ends. Were you really foolish enough to think he actually cared about you? That he loved you? Who could ever love you? There's nothing about you to love. You're a selfish, arrogant brat, and even if someone bothered to try to dig deeper than that all they'd find is your twisted and ugly soul, broken into so many pieces it'd be almost impossible to put it back together.

Dimly, he registered that his brother was knocking on the door and calling out for him, but he couldn't move except to draw raggedy breaths.

If he'd been frightened before, Mokuba was terrified now. He'd never heard Seto crying before. His brother had always seemed above anything or anyone being able to hurt him.

"Seto! Seto! Let me in, please!"

"What's going on?" Trudy rounded the corner.

When she'd heard Seto and Alistair fighting, she'd ignored it like she always did, but when she'd gone to let the carpet cleaners in and heard Mokuba yelling upstairs, she'd instructed them to go ahead and start in the living room and run up the stairs.

"It's Seto," Mokuba wept as Trudy pulled the teen into her arms. "He won't come out of his room!" She could see that Mokuba was badly shaken, but she wasn't sure why since it was far from the first time that Seto and Alistair had gotten into a yelling match.

"I'll have a talk with both of them once Alistair gets back," she promised, soothingly rubbing Mokuba's back. She frowned. She was really becoming fed up with what they kept putting the younger Kaiba through. He wasn't a child anymore, but in her opinion he was still far too young to have to bear witness to his older brother's many domestic disputes.

"He's not coming back," Mokuba said morosely, hiccupping slightly. "Seto told him he's not allowed to come back." Her frown deepened. She let go of Mokuba and turned to her employers closed door. Knocking crisply several times she said:

"Come out here this instant! You can fire me or sue me or whatever you please, but you are not going to put this child through this again, do you hear me? It's not fair. Either you and Alistair keep your spats to yourselves, or reevaluate your relationship, because I can't stand for you to traumatize Mokuba like this! The two of you are setting a horrible example for your brother-the one you swore you would take care of! I don't care how much money you make or how many theme parks you open; throwing things around and yelling at someone that you're standing a foot in front of is a pretty miserable way for a role model to behave!"

When Seto didn't respond, she turned back to Mokuba.

"I see that he'd rather sulk than take responsibility for this, so come on; let's leave him to it. I'll go tell Miss Carmichael that her services won't be necessary today and then you and I are going out. I've been meaning to go to that craft shop downtown for a while now anyway; I want to make a wind chime and I called the owner who says they have glass pieces that would be perfect." She steered the raven-haired boy down the stairs, glancing over her shoulder as he reluctantly followed her lead. Truth be told: as much as she was annoyed by the situation, she was also a bit worried about Seto who she had never known to lock himself in his room. Shut the door certainly, but never lock it or blatantly ignore his brother like that. If he still hadn't come out by the time she and Mokuba got back she resolved to ask George where the skeleton key was to make sure that he was alright.

Author's Note: We have officially entered the 'hurt' section of this 'hurt/comfort' fic, so be warned that things will be taking a rather dark turn, particularly on Seto's end for the next few chapters.

This is mostly based on my own headcanon, but I feel like for the most part his arrogance is a front to cover up his self-loathing which is the result of being psychologically abused by Gozaburo, and thinking that he's been betrayed by one of the only people he trusts is just the straw that broke the camel's back.