Disclaimer: It's been months since I updated but I have failed to acquire ownership of Yu-Gi-Oh! in the interim. Damn.

"Your soulmate is not someone that comes into your life peacefully.

It is who comes to make you question things, who changes your reality,

somebody that marks a before and after in your life.

It is not the human being everyone has idealized,

but an ordinary person, who manages to revolutionize your world in a second…"

Anonymous

Chapter 31

"I can't believe you punched him," Alistair said, peeling his gloves off and tossing them onto the room's coffee table while Seto shrugged his jacket off and threw it over the back of a dark blue armchair.

"Why not? He insulted you—and me—and needed to be put in his place."

"Why did he even think that?" Seto looked at him a moment, mulling over how he wanted to explain von Schroeder's assumption.

"Domino is a rich city for the most part and even the poor areas are expensive by the standards of some of the countries nearby. It's also difficult to gain citizenship, especially if you don't have a lot of money. Some people here take advantage of their wealth by promising a better life to anyone willing to sleep with them." He would have thought that Alistair knew that considering his very disapproving attitude towards the upper-classes, but the look on the redhead's face told Seto that this particular practice had escaped his attention.

"That's disgusting."

"That's why I punched him. It was completely out of line for him to assume that that was the situation. Granted, he always was an entitled, prejudiced—."

"I'm not really that insulted that he thought that, I'm more so disgusted that people do that. It's completely perverse to capitalize on someone else's misery." Seto hadn't really been thinking about the situation in such broad terms, but he supposed that Alistair was right. Always so altruistic…

"I can't say I'm surprised he'd want to; he's a snake and is therefore far too repulsive to find anyone to sleep with him for free."

Alistair could have pointed out that the same could objectively be said about Seto, but chose not to start a very unnecessary argument when they had far more important things to talk about. "How do you feel?" he asked cautiously. Seto still seemed (understandably) wound up and he'd begun pacing back and forth in front of the huge bay window overlooking the park.

"I'm fine," he insisted, forcing himself to stop pacing. Alistair shot him a skeptical look and crossed his arms. "Once I know what everyone is saying I'll be able to relax."

"So check." Alistair gestured towards the brunet's laptop case which was leaning against the bedside table.

Seto hesitated. He really did feel the need to find out what was being said, but he didn't want to know. What if Alistair and Saito were right and having done this caused more problems than he'd been able to foresee? Still, not looking wasn't going to make it go away, so he ultimately crossed to the bed and pulled his laptop out of the case and rested it on his legs, pulling up his favorite news sources the moment the computer booted up. Not surprisingly, a photo of him kissing Alistair on the red carpet and an accompanying 'news story' and film clip were already gracing the front page of the Dueling Network's website. The headline read: Seto Kaiba Shocks the World with Gay Red-Carpet Kiss. He rolled his eyes. He highly doubted that 'the world' gave a damn about who he did or didn't kiss.

The article (the multiple spelling and grammar errors of which alluded to how quickly and without thought it had been written) essentially listed a series of questions under the guise of actual journalism. Was Kaiba gay? Was the man he'd kissed his boyfriend? Was it just a publicity stunt to put Kaiba Corp back in the spotlight? Was he going to go public as the first openly gay duelist?

"Anything interesting?" Alistair asked tentatively, sitting beside him on the bed and reading over his shoulder.

"Of course not," Seto replied, snapping the laptop shut before the redhead could read what it was that the internet had to say about him, not all of which had been flattering.

"But now at least you know." Seto nodded, suddenly wondering why he hadn't received any phone calls from work before remembering that he'd turned his phone to silent so he wouldn't have to put up with the barrage of inevitable messages from the PR department. He pulled out his cell phone, saw that he had just as many missed phone calls and messages as he'd had the day the Out Loud article had come out, and set it aside on the desk before laying down on his back with his eyes closed, his legs dangling off the side of the bed.

"What did Wheeler say?" Seto asked curiously. "I saw him flailing around like a fish out of water, which I suppose is fitting seeing as he hardly belonged here in the first place." Alistair rolled his eyes, but he was smiling slightly. Admit it or not, Seto spent an inordinate amount of time fussing about what Joey thought for someone who claimed to hate him. Alistair lay beside Seto on the bed.

"I think his actual first coherent sentence was something along the lines of 'what the hell?' followed by a practically incomprehensible rant about what a horrible person you are. Then Yugi and Tea intervened and did this awkward thing where they talked about everything but that, which to be honest I would have been fine with except that Mai just had to throw in her two cents about how she couldn't blame me since it's obviously in my nature to latch onto the most powerful person around."

"I forgot that she worked for Dartz too. How pathetic of her to act all high and mighty when you both had the same boss."

"I have no idea what Joey and Valon see in her."

"Don't you?"

"I meant besides her boobs."

"I can't speak for your friend, but I guarantee you that Wheeler is too stupid to want anything more than Mai Valentine's breasts." Alistair wouldn't necessarily call Joey stupid and he would have said something about it had he not known that calling the sandy-haired duelist 'stupid' was Seto's unconscious way of acknowledging his affection for him.

"Anyway, that's what they had to say, what about Pegasus?"

Seto snorted derisively."He thinks that because we happen to 'bat for the same team' we should be best friends. I reminded him that he and I never were and never will be anything remotely akin to friends. Then Siegfried decided to join the party and you know the rest."

Alistair propped himself up on one elbow. "Do you think he was serious about suing you?"

"I doubt it. He's completely self-absorbed and ridiculously affected, but even if his company is a fossil that's just barely dragging along, he's not stupid. He wouldn't really want to go to court with me because if we went it would end up looking worse for him than for me considering that he instigated the whole thing."

"Since when did being a dick trump punching someone?"

"Since I hired a better lawyer."

"How do you know that?"

Seto smirked but didn't open his eyes."My lawyer's the best. Do you honestly think I would have punched him if I thought there was a chance that I'd have to suffer negative consequences?"

Alistair raised an eyebrow. "I was under the impression that you weren't thinking at all when you did it. You looked as taken aback as he did."

"You're so ungrateful; you haven't even said thank you."

"Why, because you defended my honor? I don't need your help with that. Believe it or not, I'm actually capable of taking care of myself. Though I must admit that I'm glad to know chivalry isn't dead, although I never would have expected you to be the one to prove that."

Seto noted that Alistair sounded more amused than anything else. This time he did open his eyes."Just thought I'd settle the score considering how many times you've defended me to the Geek Squad."

"What makes you think I have?" Seto quirked an eyebrow as though to say: 'nice try but I can still see right through you.' "Ok, say I have, does this make us even?"

"I didn't see any bruises on Wheeler's face, so I'd say you have to step your game up."

"You're so incorrigible."

"I think I liked you better before you expanded your vocabulary."

"Why, because you could actually understand me?" Alistair asked snidely.

"Because then you weren't capable of calling me anything that forced me to think about the flaws in my character."

"I'd say that your inability to take anyone who hasn't swallowed a dictionary seriously is a character flaw in and of itself."

"Probably." Seto sat up and began drumming his fingertips on the bedspread. Today had been a big day for him already and he knew that Alistair probably thought that the evening held no more surprises, but he'd be wrong.

Alistair noticed that Seto had started to fidget and decided that the brunet was still agitated about that afternoon's events.

"Maybe Saito is overreacting," he said soothingly, resting a hand on the CEO's knee. "You're absolutely right about Domino being liberal. And you're not half as camp as Pegasus and his company doesn't seem like it's going to go under anytime soon; I really don't think you have anything to worry about."

Seto nodded but continued to look troubled. Suddenly he stood up and announced he was going to take a shower. Alistair normally would have followed him, but he could tell that Seto wanted some time alone so he remained on the bed to allow the brunet a chance to think.

As he stood under the warm water streaming out of bathroom's fancy silver spigot, he rested his forehead against the cool tile of the wall. He knew he didn't have to do this, especially not on the back of all the other things he'd done that day, but he was afraid that if he put it off he'd psych himself out even more and then take his feelings of self-resentment out on Alistair. And that couldn't happen. He wanted to do this for Alistair- pushing him away would be completely counterproductive.

For the first time in months he heard his step-father's voice oozing out from between the cracks of the mental wall he'd put up against it.

Who would have thought that the great Seto Kaiba would turn out to be so subservient? I never thought that even you would sink so low. What will he think of you once he sees that you're nothing but a sissy? Do you think he'll respect you then?

"Stop it," Seto muttered out loud, gripping the stone edge of the shelf holding shampoo and body wash. What I did today, what I'm going to do; they're power moves, not the moves of a 'sissy.' How can I be the pathetic one when you're the one rotting in the ground? You don't have the power to control ME anymore, old man. He let go of the ledge and straightened his back, though he knew he'd probably never be able to erase the voice completely.

While Seto was in the shower, Alistair had opened the brunet's laptop, easily guessed the password after casting around in his head for the passwords of Seto's that he'd already memorized, and proceeded to check up on the news from the day himself. His research revealed that Siegfried von Schroeder wasn't the only person who assumed that he was a prostitute based on nothing more than his heritage. The supposition left him burning with anger. Between the porn site owner at Byzantium and now this it seemed that people were quick to fetishize him.

A short internet search told him that he wasn't the only one. Red-haired, gray-eyed women and men were the basis for entire porn and escort service sites. The worst part was that he understood it. So many people he'd known would have done anything to get across the border to safety, including selling their bodies. It was, it seemed, the easiest way, and Alistair couldn't blame anyone who took advantage of it, but that wealthy people, people that had the power to find a different solution, capitalized off of it—in more ways than one- that he found fundamentally deplorable. Now he understood why the disappearances in his hometown had so disturbed his mother.

"What's wrong?"

Alistair looked up. Seto had just walked back out of the bathroom with a fresh shirt and pants on. His hair was dry but Alistair hadn't even heard the hair dryer. Given the redhead's clenched jaw and the open laptop Seto felt that he knew what it was that was bothering him, but decided to let Alistair explain it himself.

"Did you know about this?" Alistair demanded, flipping the computer around so that the display faced Seto. The brunet's eyes quickly took in the images on the screen.

"Yes and no. I knew about the mistresses, as I already mentioned, but I didn't know that that crossed over to pornography too; though I could have guessed."

"I was just living up to the stereotype," Alistair said softly. "I'm no better." Suddenly he felt horribly used. "No, you're no better!" he added loudly, looking hurt. "You did the exact same thing! You knew I had nowhere to go, that I had no money, and you took advantage of that! You probably get off to this," he jabbed the laptop screen with his finger, "just like every other rich bastard in Domino! Except now you don't need that because you get the real thing!"

Concerned, Seto crossed to the bed and put his hands on Alistair's shoulders."Alistair: calm down," he said firmly. "This isn't—." But Alistair wasn't listening.

"You can't tell me what to do! You don't own me! Let me go!" Wild-eyed, he kicked out and almost caught Seto in the stomach with his heavy boot, but Seto hurriedly backed out of reach. In the commotion, the laptop fell off the bed and landed on the floor with a loud thump, instantly turning the screen black, several large cracks now running across it. Seto winced, but knew that the computer was not the most important thing at the moment. He hadn't seen Alistair like this in a very long time and could only assume that the online search he'd conducted had triggered it.

"Alistair: I'm not like that, you know that."

"You used me." Voice shaking and fists clenched, Alistair rose to his feet

"Never," he said firmly, though he did have his arms raised defensively in front of him, uncertain what Alistair might do.

"I don't believe you!" Alistair shouted, lunging at him. Again, Seto backed out of the way and was forced to grab the redhead by his wrists to stop him from hitting him. As Alistair continued to struggle, Seto did the only thing he could think of. Letting go of his wrists, he wrapped his arms around him and pulled him against his chest, much like he did after Alistair was plagued by nightmares. The effect was immediate. Alistair sagged against him, his breathing returning to normal, and Seto sighed in relief.

"It's ok," he said soothingly, tightening his grip around the redhead's shoulders. "You're alright."

"I'm sorry," Alistair whispered, his face pressed against Seto's shoulder, his heart still racing. "I could see their faces," he murmured after a pause, his own grip around the brunet tensing. "They would have done it if it meant getting out of that place. Some of them probably did. Why am I always the lucky one?" Seto didn't have an answer for that.

A few minutes later, Saito and Roland burst through the suite door, causing both Seto and Alistair to jump visibly.

"What happened?" Saito asked at the same moment that Roland said:

"Are you alright, sir?"

Seto quickly put the pieces together. Someone had heard the laptop fall off the bed or Alistair yelling or both and had alerted Roland or Saito, who had alerted the other one, and the two had charged upstairs and used the key card they possessed to open the door, expecting trouble. Instead they merely saw Seto with his arms protectively around Alistair who had his head buried against the brunet's shoulder, and their boss's ruined laptop on the floor.

"Everything's fine," Seto said reassuringly. "I just knocked my laptop off the bed."

"The maid we talked to said she heard yelling."

"It's nothing." Seto's tone made it clear he wanted them to go. Exchanging a look, the two men left again.

"I'm sorry," Alistair repeated.

"Don't be." Seto guided the two of them back to the bed. Alistair immediately rested his head in the brunet's lap and clung to the fabric of his pants as Seto uncertainly began gently stroking the redhead's back. For the next two or three minutes, all Alistair seemed to be able to say was 'I'm sorry.' Finally, he more completely relaxed, his hold on Seto's pants loosening.

"Thank you," he mumbled.

"What for? I did a lousy job of preventing that from happening. I should have warned you not to look that up."

"I would have anyway; that's not your fault. I just mean thank you for hugging me; that really helped."

"You don't really think that I would ever use you like that, do you?" Seto asked cautiously. Alistair sat up abruptly.

"No! Of course not!" He was confused by the almost guilty expression on the brunet's face. "Why do you ask?"

Seto hesitated, not sure that he wanted to tell Alistair why he was suddenly feeling so uncomfortable, but now that the topic was broached he broke down and told the redhead about the porn movie he'd watched several months before. "I picked that one because the actor looked like you," he explained, not able to meet Alistair's silver eyes—the same color of those of the porn actor. "But it wasn't about him being from there, and I'm not attracted to you because you are either. I don't know what it was. I'm sorry."

Alistair stared at him, letting the information sink in."You were watching a porn movie?" he asked finally. The heat rising in his face, Seto nodded. "When? Was it while you were in China?"

"It was before you and I had ever done it. Right before we left for Hamburg. I wanted to make sure that I knew what I was doing."

"So you watched a porn movie?" Alistair couldn't prevent himself from laughing.

"It was a one-time thing," Seto muttered in annoyance, though if laughing at him was helping Alistair feel better he supposed he could allow it.

"Did the movie by any chance involve someone getting fucked over a desk?" Seto began cracking the knuckles of his left hand in lieu of responding. "I knew you were into that!"

"I'm glad you're feeling better," Seto snapped, his cheeks burning.

"Yeah, I guess I am." The smile faded from his face. "That was really scary though. It's happened before, but not in a long time."

"I was afraid of that. That's why I didn't want you to see what had been written about you. I should have thought of that before I agreed to go public with you, but it didn't even occur to me. I was being selfish. I could have made a statement without having you there; that would have protected you for a while, but instead I had to make the whole thing unnecessarily dramatic."

"That's what I wanted too," Alistair said reassuringly. "I wanted to be there, see everyone's faces. This is just the price I pay for it."

"I'll protect you," Seto promised, his face and tone serious. "From this, from everything."

"You can't. This is something I have to face on my own. Knowing that you'll be there for me when I need you is good enough. And the same goes for you from me. If you need me I'll do whatever I can to help." He placed his hand on top of Seto's on the bed. "We're a team." Seto looked down at their interlocked fingers and then back up into Alistair's face. He supposed this was as good a moment as any to make his request.

"There is something that I want to do that I need you for," he began slowly.

"What is it?" Alistair furrowed his eyebrows in concern; Seto's tone had been very hesitant.

"I…" Seto forced himself to look into Alistair's eyes. "I want you to…to have sex with me."

"What?" Alistair was taken aback. They hardly, if ever, discussed having sex beforehand; it usually just sort of happened, so why Seto was making a point to bring it up he didn't know. Nor did he understand why the brunet seemed so skittish about it.

"Ok," he responded slowly. "I'll go take a shower." He started to get up, but Seto tightened his hold on Alistair's hand, preventing him from going too far.

"I don't think you understand what I mean." Alistair stared at him blankly. "I want you to...to have sex with me."

Comprehension hit Alistair all of a sudden and his mouth fell open slightly. "Why?" he asked finally. Seto let go of the redhead's hand and looked down at his own fingers as he answered.

"Because you always wanted to."

"I never—."

"You didn't have to say anything; it was obvious."

"Ok, yeah, but that doesn't mean you have to—."

"I know. It's for me too. My psychiatrist told me that it would be good for me to relinquish my control over things sometimes. I can't do that at work or else the whole company would fall apart so…"

"And you're sure?"

"Obviously."

"I'm only asking because you don't seem very sure, and I know how you are when it comes to this and I wouldn't want you to regret it and get all resentful because you're feeling emasculated."

"Give me a little bit of credit."

"Don't do this for me. I'll be fine if we never do that ever. You have to want to do it. Do you?"

Seto considered the question. The immediate answer he came up with was no, he didn't want to at all. There were several reasons for this, the most important of which was that he was afraid that he'd like it. And he felt as though liking it would make him the sissy that Gozaburo had always said he was.

There was the element of control as well. The idea of making himself that vulnerable, of relinquishing the control of his body to someone else, even if that person was Alistair, put him on edge. But he'd decided to ignore those feelings and go through with it anyway to prove to the redhead once and for all just how much he trusted him in an attempt to make up for not having trusted him before. He couldn't tell Alistair any of that though; he'd never agree to it then.

"I want to do it," he said finally.

"That's a really major thing though," Alistair pointed out. "And it's been a long day already."

"So what? Are you tired?"

"No, but—."

"Then why not today? Right now?"

"Because I don't—."

"You've done it before, haven't you? With Bakura?"

Alistair suddenly narrowed his eyes."Please don't tell me this is some weird jealousy thing."

"Of course not," Seto scoffed. "I told you that there's no way I'd ever be jealous of him, especially considering that you left him for me. I can only assume that's partially because he wasn't able to satisfy you." Alistair crossed his arms.

"You both act as though sex is everything."

"Don't include me in that; I don't think that. I'm just making the point that while it may not be everything, it is something, and if he couldn't meet the standards that you've come to expect from me, well…I don't imagine that it would work out."

Alistair rolled his eyes."You certainly have a high opinion of yourself."

"You've known me far too long for that to shock you. Anyway, back to my original question: you've done it before, right?"

"Yeah," Alistair relented. "And I can tell you right now that unless you've learned how to relax it isn't going to work."

"What, you don't think I can handle a little pain?"

"I'm sure you can, but you're already using the wrong mindset. It's not about endurance; it's about pleasure. And yeah, it hurts, but it also feels good. If you're not open to that then there's really no point."

"Of course I'm open to it or else I wouldn't have brought it up! Look: the longer we drag this little chat out the more nervous you're making me, so can we please get on with it?" Seto had never admitted that he was nervous about something before, so Alistair knew he must actually be terrified. But he could also see that trademark Seto Kaiba determination shining in his sapphire eyes.

"Ok," he agreed, and Seto looked simultaneously apprehensive and grateful. "Let me take a quick shower so I'm at least not sweaty to begin with and in the meantime: try to relax. And if you change your mind just say so; it's not like I'll hold it against you."

While he was stripping out of his clothes in the bathroom Alistair puzzled over this newest twist in an already very unusual day. What was with Seto's sudden interest in bottoming? Was he trying to prove something or did he actually want to? He supposed it could be both; Seto could want to do it but feel obligated to justify that desire by acting as though it would merely prove a point about…what? Trust maybe. Alistair paused before getting in the shower. That would make sense. He could easily imagine that Seto was hoping to use this as a means of apologizing once and for all for not having trusted him. But that raised the question: knowing that, should he go through with it? He wanted to; this was something he'd always wanted to try, but if Seto was only suggesting it as a bargaining chip he knew he probably ought not to. But maybe he was simply thinking too much into it. Maybe the brunet really did want to for no other reason than wanting to.

Seto lay on the bed, trying to mentally prepare himself for what was to come. He had no reason to be so anxious. He reminded himself that Alistair would not judge him, nor would he hurt him on purpose, and also that this was supposed to be a pleasurable experience, not torture.

He tried his best to relax, but it proved to be an extremely difficult task and in the end he couldn't even calm his breathing. He got up and began pacing to try to work off some of his extra adrenaline, but only succeeded in almost tripping over his ruined laptop. Sighing, he clicked it shut and returned it to its case; he'd have to replace it when they got back to Domino.

He was on his third or fourth lap around the room when Alistair emerged from the bathroom with a towel around his waist, his vibrant hair still damp. Seto finished the lap before sitting back down on the bed and looking more like he was waiting for a doctor's appointment than anything else. Alistair sat beside him. He opened his mouth to remind Seto that he in no way had to do this, but the brunet cut him off before he could say anything by kissing him.

Things escalated quickly from there and before long Seto pulled Alistair's towel off and got on his knees on the floor so he could go down on him, first dragging his lips along the sensitive skin of the redhead's upper thigh and causing him to sigh, tilt his head back, and close his eyes before entering that strange fugue state that only a blowjob can induce. He let the brunet carry on for a bit before telling him to stop.

Seto stood just long enough to take his shirt off and Alistair leaned forward to kiss along the taught muscle in the brunet's chest and stomach until Seto rejoined him on the mattress.

Normally they'd maintain this fast pacing, but given the circumstances, Alistair decided to slow things down a bit. He let his fingers trail down the Seto's torso, coming to rest on his belt buckle, which he undid before pulling the zipper on the brunet's pants down.

Seto stopped him from actually sliding his pants off and instead pulled Alistair back up in order to kiss him again; drinking in his familiar scent and the feel of his body as a means of fully getting into the mood and belaying his nerves.

Once he was more comfortable, Seto sat up to take his pants off, noting that his heart was starting to race again. Up until then everything had been standard, but from here on out things were going to deviate from the norm. Instead of Alistair, it was he who got down on his stomach.

"Condoms and lube are in the inside pocket of my suitcase," he said, his voice slightly muffled by the blue comforter. Alistair, who still had reservations about the entire affair, nonetheless got up and retrieved the items from Seto's metallic suitcase.

"Are you ok?" he asked in concern after returning to the bed; he didn't like the listless way that Seto was lying there.

"Of course. I'm relaxing; can't you tell?" Alistair didn't believe him for a moment and began massaging the tense muscles in the brunet's back while Seto lay with his head resting on his forearms. Alistair suddenly had an idea for how to put Seto at ease; namely by teasing him.

"You have nothing to worry about."

"How's that?"

"I had to put up with an amateur; you get an expert."

"I didn't hear any complaints from you; quite the opposite in fact," Seto replied impishly, some of his bravado returning.

"So just imagine how much better I'll be."

"I'll be the judge of that!"

"Deal." Alistair stopped rubbing the brunet's back and rested his forehead against the side of Seto's head. "I love you," he said, the hand still on Seto's back squeezing his shoulder slightly. Seto didn't say it back, but Alistair hadn't expected him to.

Despite himself, as soon as Alistair's lube-coated fingers touched him, Seto tensed and involuntarily shied away. Alistair pulled his hand back immediately. Seto grit his teeth.

"Try again."

"Are you sure?"

"Yes!" Seto barked, embarrassed that this was so difficult for him. Alistair dutifully tried again and this time the brunet didn't shy away, though Alistair could feel his body actively resisting. With his free hand, he stroked Seto's back and finally he felt him start to actually relax, which in turn allowed him to enjoy the whole situation much more. It was quite true that he'd wanted to do this for quite some time but he'd been certain Seto would never allow it.

"Alright," he said. "Are you ready?"

"Just do it," came the gruff reply.

It was agony. Seto had to bite down hard on his bottom lip to keep from crying out. It was the most acute pain he'd ever known. He couldn't imagine that getting stabbed would feel any worse, but he didn't tell Alistair to stop. Go big or go home, he said to himself for about the hundredth time that day as the metallic taste of blood found its way into his mouth from the split in his lip biting down so hard had caused.

Alistair, for his part, did his best to be as gentle and slow as possible and tilted Seto's hips up as he'd done with Ryou.

"How does that feel?" he asked.

"Peachy," Seto said sarcastically, though his voice sounded strained.

"Should I—?"

"No. Keep going. I'm fine."

Alistair obliged, but cautiously.

Slowly but surely the pain began to subside and Seto could start to appreciate the pleasure what Alistair was doing brought with it and found himself moving with him as he'd observed the redhead do so many times. Alistair noticed the change as well and was glad for it.

It was a very strange feeling Seto decided. And he wasn't sure if he was a fan for it or not. It was pleasurable in a physical sense, but he couldn't quite mentally allow himself to go there. Plus, it was taking a lot of his concentration to keep his step-father's mocking voice out of his head.

Despite feeling uncomfortable, Seto was intrigued by this different side of Alistair he was getting to see; a rather romantic side. At one point Alistair had leaned across Seto's back and threaded their fingers together on the mattress. He was very attentive to any sort of reaction from Seto and made an obvious effort to do everything he could to make the experience a good one.

In the end Seto was simply too exhausted and tense to cum, and denied Alistair the opportunity to finish him off in favor of lying back in the bed, completely spent, his hair wet with perspiration. Alistair got up briefly to toss the used condom in the trashcan, but quickly returned. Seto was facing away from him, but turned as Alistair got back into the bed beside him.

"You're bleeding!" he noted with a jolt, reaching out to trace the smeared line of dried blood on the brune's chin.

"Yeah," Seto responded sleepily. "I bit my lip." It was then that Alistair noticed just how puffy the brunet's bottom lip was and his eyes filled with concern when he realized that Seto had probably been biting down on it so hard to distract himself from the pain that he'd caused it to bleed.

"Why didn't you tell me I was hurting you? I asked you so many times!"

"I'm not a wimp," Seto said with dignity. "I could handle it. Besides, if I would have said something you would have stopped."

"Of course!"

"I couldn't have that. Then you would have had to start over again."

"Seto, you idiot! I really could have hurt you!"

Seto avoided catching Alistair's eye. "Well, you didn't. I'm fine."

Alistair shook his head incredulously. "You're unbelievable."

"Thanks." Seto said snarkily, though he was starting to have trouble stringing thoughts let alone words together. How was it that Alistair so often managed to be so full of energy after they had sex? He was completely worn out. He sat up, intending to get up to make himself a coffee, wincing slightly, but as soon as he started to walk the ten feet to the coffee maker after pulling his underwear and pants back on, he wished he hadn't; every step hurt. Alistair couldn't help but notice that Seto was limping and jumped up.

"I can do it," he offered, hurriedly yanking his underwear back on.

"No, you can't: you don't know how to make coffee."

"Says you," he grumbled, joining Seto in the suite's living room. "For your information: I do know how to make coffee; how do you think I was able to stay awake through all your mind-numbing board meetings?" Seto would have asked what the hell board meetings Alistair had ever been to had he not known that he had watched them via the security camera footage he'd hacked.

"I stand corrected," Seto said absently as he measured out coffee grounds which he then dumped into the top of the machine.

"Are you alright?" Alistair asked, his feelings of concern returning.

"Of course."

"Don't give me that; you can barely stand."

"Bully for me then. Why are you so interested in how I'm feeling anyway? Did you always leave Bakura unable to walk or something?"

"Why are you asking me that?" Alistair asked suspiciously. Seto sleepily shrugged a shoulder before yawning.

"Curiosity."

"I'm sure." Seto rolled his eyes before beginning to hobble over to the couch where he sat down gingerly and leaned back against the cushions to wait for the coffee to be finished.

"Why do you always assume I have some kind of ulterior motive when I ask you something?"

"Because you usually do," Alistair shot back, sitting beside him.

"Touché."

"I'm serious though: please tell me that you actually got something out of that; you're starting to make me feel like I was just torturing you for twenty minutes."

"You weren't," Seto replied shortly. "It's not my thing though. It's nothing to do with you," he added. "I just couldn't get into it like you can; I kept hearing my step-father's voice in my head, calling me a pathetic sissy." Alistair studied Seto's face, but it was impassive. Brow creasing in concern, he tentatively asked:

"He never did anything to you, did he?"

Seto's face darkened."I wouldn't have let him if he'd tried. But I think somehow he knew about me, even though I didn't myself, because he'd say things to me sometimes. Whenever he thought I was showing weakness he'd call me a sissy. I thought that I was past him being able to bother me, but I guess not." The last statement was more so directed at himself.

The coffee machine dinged and Alistair hastily got to his feet to pour Seto a cup, leaving the brunet reclining on the couch.

"Here," he said a moment later, offering up the steaming drink.

"Thanks." Seto took the ceramic mug from him and stared into it thoughtfully for a moment.

"Why did you want to do this?" Alistair asked cautiously. Seto looked over at him and mulled it over before deciding to answer honestly.

"I knew you wanted to. But it was also because it's important to me that you know that despite what happened before, I trust you completely."

"How long had you been planning that?"

"A while. But I couldn't bring myself to do it before. After talking with you yesterday though, I knew it was important to do that today, despite the fact that I already had a lot on my plate."

"You don't regret it, do you?"

He shook his head. "No. But I don't think I'll do it again."

Alistair smiled.

"What?"

"Nothing. It's just that I'm glad you feel that way; I prefer things the other way around too."

"I've noticed." Suddenly Seto was struck by a thought. "How did that work with you and Bakura?"

"What do you mean?" Alistair asked warily, stalling for time while he tried to figure out how/if to answer the question.

"Don't be dense; you know what I mean. I can't imagine that he'd be capable of that. Though I suppose I shouldn't just make assumptions…"

"We tried it once," Alistair explained shortly.

Seto was burning with curiosity but Alistair clearly thought it was none of his business, which he supposed was probably fair. It also led him to believe that the redhead hadn't talked about their sex life to Bakura which he was grateful for.

"I'm going to have to make another statement about this." Seto sounded resigned.

"Probably."

"Would you go with me?"

Alistair looked over at him in surprise. "Sure, but why? I'm not anybody important."

"You keep saying that, but you are. If you really want to do something worthwhile then use this opportunity to address the assumptions that people are making about you. You'd certainly have everyone's attention."

Alistair sat back against the black leather of the couch, his thoughts suddenly swirling. Seto was right. This would be an excellent opportunity to do something, to raise awareness of this problem, maybe even help some of his people. But would anyone listen to him? Perhaps, perhaps not. With Seto Kaiba backing him up he supposed it was worth a try.

"You're right."

"Of course I am. I'm a businessman; I know how to milk situations like this."

Alistair rolled his eyes, but he was also glad that Seto seemed to be taking the aftermath of what they'd just done in stride; he'd been afraid that the brunet would harbor resentment and close himself off again.

"I think it's good that we spent time apart," Seto said suddenly, staring intently at the small tendril of steam rising from the white coffee mug. Alistair was used to Seto jumping from topic to topic without much warning even if he still found it rather disconcerting.

"I agree. But why do you think so?"

"It made me realize how much I hate that."

"Oh?"

"People always used to drain me, even Mokuba to a certain degree. And you. But once you were gone, even when I was convinced that you were guilty of betraying me, I loathed being alone. I'm far less disgusted by myself than I used to be, but high self-esteem is no substitute for having someone at your side."

It was probably the most romantic thing that he'd ever heard the brunet say, and yet, Alistair wasn't surprised by it. Seto, despite what he and most everyone else might think, was actually quite romantic in his ideology if nothing else. The high value he placed on trust, acting as a knight in shining armor galloping off to rescue his loved ones when they were in trouble, reading Black Beauty just because he knew that it was Alistair's favorite book, and perhaps most importantly, the despair he'd felt when he'd thought he'd been stabbed in the back by someone he loved. A true romantic considers love to be sacred and cannot believe that not everyone else does. Sappy he might not be, but passionate, that was a word that could certainly be used to describe Seto Kaiba.

They sat in silence, and as Seto sipped at his coffee, Alistair curled up in a cat-like fashion on the sofa and put his head in the brunet's lap. With the hand not holding his coffee, Seto languidly stroked Alistair's hair and upper back.

The world outside seemed to both of them extremely irrelevant; here in the San Francisco Kaiba Land suite they were the only two people that mattered and time stood still for them.

It was an artificial feeling, they both knew that. Something would eventually happen to shatter the nirvana that they'd managed to find, but at that exact moment, despite being tired and sore, despite knowing that he had just made a life-changing decision that could very well ruin his career, Seto felt that his life was perfect. Even if his entire world came crashing down around him he wouldn't be left with nothing.

Against all odds he actually had people in his life that cared about him. He had Mokuba, Trudy, Saito, Roland…and Alistair. But he had himself too. True, there were times when his step-father whispered in his ear, but even though that was far from pleasant, he'd finally chosen a path after standing at a crossroad for almost eight years, teetering on the verge of turning into the very person he'd hated the most. He was not Gozaburo, and he wasn't Kaiba, he was Seto, someone who was weak sometimes, someone who wasn't perfect, but also someone who was capable of being good, someone who could trust and love. He'd been so sure that his future was empty, that his only purpose had been to look after his brother, but that wasn't true. Alistair offered mystery and adventure, two things that Seto had thought he'd never experience again. Professionally, he knew precisely how his life would go, but now work wasn't the only thing that mattered to him.

He'd learned his lesson. He knew better than to base his happiness on Alistair; that wasn't fair to either of them. But even though Alistair leaving would be devastating, and even though a part of his heart would always belong to him no matter what happened, he was optimistic that he would be able to recover and maybe even fall in love with someone else, though admittedly he couldn't imagine that.

Alistair sighed softly and Seto realized that he'd fallen asleep. He carefully set his coffee back down on the table and brushed the redhead's bangs off his face, his fingertips lingering on Alistair's cheek. Life truly was an extraordinary thing.

The End

Author's Note: Finally, finally, we reach the end of Out Loud. It's been a wild ride from start to finish trying to write this in a way that shows how much love I have for my boys, and it's really sad in some ways to type 'the end'-but that's what one-shots are for I suppose, so stay tuned.

Thanks for sticking it out to the end, and I hope to catch you in my next story. I smell Euroshipping (and some more Warshipping of course) on the horizon!