Disclaimer: I do not own A Song of Ice and Fire.
Another dragon, another wolf, another stag
Chapter 39: Rhaenys
"Talking"
"Thinking"
(Location: King's Landing)
The air in the throne room was part tense, part anticipating. Rhaenys could glance up on the Iron Throne and see her brother, the king, waiting there. She looked down to its side and saw Queen Margaery waiting there, along with their four children. But that was not all of them. There was one more, someone the twin boys, Baelor and Gaemon, Aegon's youngest, have never met.
But they would meet him now. Today was the day they would meet their eldest brother, the crown prince. And it would the first time in almost four and ten years that Rhaenys would've seen her first nephew. If she pictured Maekar, she imagined a five year old boy, always running and smiling.
She wasn't surprised when the time came for him to be fostered. Practically everyone in Westeros was salivating for the chance to foster the Prince of Dragonstone. So when Aegon announced where his son would be fostered, it was safe to say the court and Westeros was shocked. Maekar had asked if he was being punished and then refused to go. His father ignored his complaints and sent him to serve the Lord Commander of the Night's Watch.
Thinking of the Night's Watch made her think of Jon. She couldn't help it. Even when she had been married, she still thought of him. She couldn't even think of him as Daemon. It was just a name that was attached to him but it wasn't him. To her, he was Jon.
Her parents would have disagreed if they were still living. To them, even after they had returned from Winterfell, there was no Jon Snow, only Daemon. They had history rewritten, saying that he joined the Night's Watch to stop the Seven Kingdoms from going into civil war, never mind the fact that he had escaped from King's Landing.
They had sent message after message, raven after raven, to the Wall for Daemon. Rhaenys never knew what was in them, perhaps words of love or questions. What she did know was that not a single letter had been answered. It was like they never reached their destination.
The herald banged his staff against the floor. Rhaenys rolled her eyes. "I'm nearing my forties and we still have that irritating herald." They needed to find something else, something different.
"Presenting Crown Prince Maekar Targaryen!" the herald's voice roared out for all to hear.
The doors opened and in walked her nephew. He wasn't a boy any more. At nine and ten years, he looked just like his father at that age. He walked tall and confidently. But he didn't alone. His hand held the hand of a woman his own age. She was beautiful with those blue eyes and dark honey hair. She carried a bundle in her free hand.
The both of them were not dressed for court. In fact, none of the people who came with were dressed for court. But it was she had expected from men of the Watch and wildings. It was a shock to see them together, even though it had been more than ten years since the Iron Throne had learned the wildings were allowed through the Wall to settle in the Gift.
She turned her attention to the Watchmen. She recognized her cousin, Quentyn, right away. He looked just like their Uncle Oberyn at that age. But his eyes were covered by a blindfold. He was blind. Rhaenys looked at the Dornish contingent in the court. Both Trystane and Oberyn were horrified at the sight. This was not the sight they had hoped to see. Trystane's son and Oberyn's granddaughter looked at them and then at the man, confused. They didn't know what to make of him.
She didn't know who the wildings were or the Watchmen. They all looked grim and serious, although she could see how some of them, mostly the wildings, were staring at everything with wide eyes. This was probably the first time they had ever seen such construction in their lives. What was it where they had lived?
Her eyes found the white direwolf and they went to the Watchman who walked beside it. Her heart quickened at the sight of Jon Snow. He had been a boy when they saw each other last. But now he was a man and it showed. His face was lean and long, with a beard that hung close. A scar curved around his right eye and another went through his left. His hair was still long but now it was pulled back into a knot.
He wore a sword at his side and a dagger on the other. The sword's hilt was golden with a ruby in its center. That was all she could say about it. The dagger looked different. It was black and crude. It also looked like it had been strapped to the hilt with leather. He walked with the quiet grace of a warrior and the authority of a leader. It was to be expected of the Lord Commander of the Night's Watch.
They came before the Iron Throne. Maekar stepped away from the others and bent the knee. "Father, Mother, I have returned home," he said for all to hear.
Aegon said to him, "We are glad to see you once more, Maekar, and proud to see what you have become. A boy was sent to serve the Lord Commander of the Night's Watch. A man was returned to us." He gestured to his family. "Your brothers and sister are also happy to see you as well, even those who have not met you."
Margaery ushered her children forward, to their brother. Maekar exchanged warrior grasps with Aenar, kissed Daenys on the cheeks, and knelt down so he could look Baelor and Gaemon in their eyes. He had them giggling within seconds.
He stood up and looked at his father. "I have someone for my family to meet." The woman came to his side and gave him the bundle. He held it as if life was swaddled inside. There was life swaddled inside. As soon as Rhaenys saw the babe with that Targaryen hair, she knew. "This is Maegor Targaryen, your grandson," Maekar announced.
Rhaenys looked at the court and saw how shocked they were. Whispering began, along with several annoyed looks. But there were just as many surprised looks and dismissive looks. There were lords and ladies who dismissed the babe as a bastard. She looked at Margaery. She wasn't the same but she was frustrated. Rhaenys knew why. Ever since word had come to King's Landing that her son was returning, Margaery was preparing possible betrothals.
Aegon did not rise from his throne. He looked down at the babe with cautious eyes. "I will say that he is your child, Maekar. But I would be hesitant to name him a Targaryen."
His son's eyes burned with an angry fire. "He is a Targaryen. I am married."
"To who, Maekar?" asked Margaery.
The woman stepped forward and stood beside him. "To me, Dalla," she declared with a challenge in her voice.
"A wilding?" said Daenys, stunned. "You married a wilding, brother?"
The woman looked at Rhaenys's niece angrily. "He married one of the Free Folk."
The woman standing close to Quentyn, an older version of Dalla, laughed quietly, an amused smile on her. "Aye, he did. And he damned near broke his leg stealing her too."
"Broke his leg?" said Rhaenys, the words blurting out before she could stop herself.
"Stealing?" asked Aegon.
It was Quentyn who spoke. His voice was different from the last she heard it, confident and sure of itself. "Amongst the Free Folk, if a man wants a woman, he has to steal her."
Margaery eyed him and then the woman beside him suspiciously. "And you are?"
"Val, mother of Dalla," she introduced.
Maekar took that moment to introduce the rest of the wildings. He gestured to a plain-looking man. "This is Bael, son of Mance Rayder." To a hard-looking man he said, "This is Young Sam." The tallest of the wildings had deep red hair. He had his arms folded across his chest, making it even larger. "And this is Toregg the Tall." He looked to the Watchmen, three in all. "This is Eddison Tollett—"
"There is no need to introduce the others, Maekar," Aegon said, still sitting on the Iron Throne, wearing the crown of his son's namesake. "Quentyn is known to us, as is the Lord Commander of the Night's Watch."
As he looked at him, Jon Snow stepped forward, along with Ghost. He did not bend the knee but looked up at the king as an equal. It was bold of him to do so. "I wonder what has made him so bold," Rhaenys thought to herself. She rather liked it on him.
"Greetings, King Aegon," Jon said. "I return your son to you."
He smiled. "And we thank you for the obligation of taking him in and teaching him. Many houses wish to take him but I knew of only one person who would mold him into a prince that can become a king, holding no interests but the interests of Westeros."
Rhaenys smiled softly to herself. Aegon had all but said that he had sent his son to his brother. He also all but said that the Night's Watch was like Westeros, that in watching Jon rule it, Maekar had learned how to rule the Seven Kingdoms. He silently acknowledged Jon as a teacher and a ruler.
"You honor me, your Grace. With your permission, I would talk to a member of your court. There is something I must give them."
"By all means, Lord Commander, go on."
He turned and walked towards the court, his wolf staying in place. He walked to the Reach contingent, to where Randyll Tarly, a warrior even at his age, his son and grandson. Lord Randyll hardened his gaze to him but Jon ignored him for his son. "You are Dickon Tarly," he said.
The heir to Horn Hill nodded shortly. He was a bulky man, with some saying that he looked like his father back in his youth. "I am."
He looked down at the boy, only five years old but staring fearlessly up at him. "This is your son, Alan." His eyes came back up to look at Dickon. "When Sam heard he was an uncle, he was ecstatic. He was so happy to hear that his little brother was a father."
Dickon was uncertain, it showed on his face. His father's eyes hardened even more. It was no secret amongst the court that he had thought his eldest son was weak and undeserving of his heritage. Once he had gone to the Wall to join the Night's Watch, his father had breathed a sigh of relief.
Jon Snow was still grim and serious. "I have a gift for your son." He pulled out the dagger in his belt and knelt down to look the boy in the eyes. He held out the dagger hilt-first to him. "This was your uncle's," he said.
Alan looked at the dagger with interest and some small confusion. "It's not steel," he said.
"No, it's not. It's made of dragonglass. It is one of the few weapons that will kill the Others and their wights."
Rhaenys felt uneasy at those words. For years now, since they had heard of the peace between the Watch and the wildings, the court has heard reports about how dead men and these Others were threatening the Wall. No one really believed it but her father sent men and supplies to aid them. And now, here was the Lord Commander saying that they were real, without really saying it.
Lord Randyll scoffed. "He must've been only glad to be rid of that dagger. He couldn't abide such things and cried like a craven."
Both the Watchmen and the wildings looked enraged. Young Sam looked the most angered. He went for the old man would've strangled him if Jon hadn't stopped him. "Calm down," he said.
The wilding didn't want to be calm. "He—"
"He doesn't know. Let me tell him." He pushed the wilding back. Quentyn went to his side, walking comfortably, and held him in place with a single hand to his shoulder. Jon looked back at the Lord Tarly. "You call Sam a craven," he said, quiet fury echoing in his voice. "And he would've thought the same if you gave him a chance. But he never would've let that dagger go from his hands willingly. It saved his life too many times for him to let it go so easily."
Lord Tarly didn't respond. But his son's eyes widened ever so slightly. "Sam's dead?" he asked. "Is that you're saying? He's dead?"
"Aye, he is. He was killed." He looked at Lord Tarly. "He died in battle, a battle where he was the first one in, protecting the Free Folk who dared to settle beyond the Wall again. They were attack by the Others and he rode to their aide."
Still Lord Tarly did not react. But Dickon did. His face was sorrowful and he only had one question. "He fought?"
"He fought until everyone was safe. When he fell, both sides fought to get him. We were only able to bring him back through the Wall by the smallest margins." He looked at Lord Tarly. "To the men of the Watch and the Free Folk, he was known as the Slayer and the War Maester. Insult him at your own risk." His fury was now much more obvious. "Young Sam over there, he's Sam's adopted son. He was named for the man. He will stand no insults to him."
Lord Randyll didn't say anything to him. Instead he looked down at his grandson. "Alan, you hold the weapon of a warrior. Treat it as such."
"Yes, Grandfather," the little boy said. He held the dagger a little more carefully now. Young Sam looked angry that nothing more was said but Rhaenys knew that was all Lord Tarly would say. He thought his son a craven and was proven wrong in the end. His pride would not allow him to say anything else, at least in public.
Jon Snow turned away from them and returned to the Iron Throne. "I also have something to return to the royal family, King Aegon." He pulled the sword out. He held it out for all to see, its blade resting on his hands.
Rhaenys saw the rippling metal, took into account what she had seen of the blade already, and realized what it was. But she couldn't believe it. "It couldn't be. Could it?" She glanced at her brother. He had the same question in his eyes.
Jon answered the question. "This is Dark Sister. It was left in Maester Aemon's care. He entrusted me when he passed away."
"It has been at the Wall all this time? You hadn't thought to send it back to us?"
"Forgive me, your Grace." He didn't sound apologetic as he spoke. "But it was needed at the Wall. But now that I am here, in King's Landing, it is only right that I return it to you."
Aegon said nothing at first. He looked down at his Kingsguard, the only woman amongst them. Arya Stark had earned her place on the Kingsguard. She served as Lady Brienne's squire as they traveled Westeros. When her teacher went back to Tarth to be its lady, she went to Essos to find Blackfyre. She had found it within the Golden Company. Five years she had spent with them, earning their trust and confidence. She was told where the sword was by her third year and stole it two years later. The Golden Company chased her to Braavos but she was able to flee to Westeros.
She did not escaped unscathed but she bore the scars proudly, especially the one over her eye. It had still been fresh when she had walked into this hall, her head held high and her hands holding Blackfyre like it was a priceless treasure. Rhaenys could remember the relief and wonder Aegon had when he took the sword from her hands, holding it in his own for the first time.
Now, that same look was in his eyes as he looked at Dark Sister. The second sword of House Targaryen was back amongst them and they had a dragon too (although Dany and the dragon was in Essos, managing the lands the Iron Throne had conquered in Essos). But something appeared in his eyes, hesitation. His eyes went from the sword to the man holding it.
"No," he finally said. "No, you are right, Lord Commander. You have more need of it now. I only ask that in the event of your death, you send it back to us."
Jon Snow nodded. "Of course, your Grace. Thank you." He slid the sword back into the sheath with ease.
As the court session, the royal family withdrew to private rooms so they could talk more privately. As soon as they were alone, Maekar embraced his father like he was a child again. His wife stood to the side, smiling knowingly. Rhaenys approached her. "May I?" she asked, looking down at her babe.
"Go ahead." She held him out to her.
She took the babe and held him carefully in her arms. He was sleeping and was uncaring of the world around him. His hair was silver, like his father's and grandfather's, but there was also a golden sheen to it as well. He must've gotten it from his mother. He was a big babe and she just knew that he would be a warrior.
Holding him in her arms like this, it reminded her of an old pain. She remembered holding her own son, Daeron, in her arms. He was a good little babe. She loved him with all of her heart. But even though she loved him, the Stranger wanted him more and took him with a cradle-fever. She lost her child and her husband when he joined the crusade in Slaver's Bay. He had left because of Daeron's death.
She smiled sadly and gave him back. "Raise him right and make sure he loves his mother," she told the woman.
"I'll teach him that and to make sure he knows how to fight," she replied.
They turned their attention to the king and his son. "The Lord Commander trained you right, Maekar," Aegon said to him.
"He did," Maekar said. "Although I'm sure that my arrival caused a surprise. I heard some of the men ask if I was being punished. Lord Jon explained it all at supper that same night, how I was to squire for him."
"Were you a good squire?" Gaemon asked him. His eyes were bright with curiosity. He wanted to know everything about the brother he had never met.
"I was. If I stepped out of line or made a mistake, he corrected me and taught me how to do it better. The times I was truly punished were when I deserved it."
Margaery looked like she was angry. But Aegon looked pensive. "Why did he punish you?"
His son looked embarrassed, somewhat. "I…I accidently called him uncle or Daemon. He made me muck out the stables and cleanout the dining halls alone every time I did."
Rhaenys's heart saddened at those words. She shouldn't have been surprised. Not a single letter that had been sent to the Wall was replied to. After all these years, he refused to believe that he was a Targaryen. She stopped herself from becoming even sadder. It wouldn't do anything.
"Maekar," Trystane said from where he stood in the room alongside Oberyn. "Who blinded Quentyn?" There was anger in his voice, something Rhaenys his son didn't see. He and Oberyn's granddaughter were at their lessons with the maester.
He looked at his father's cousin. "An Other blinded him," he answered.
"Don't be ridiculous," said Oberyn. "There's no such thing as an Other. They're just as real as the snarks and grumkins." He spoke with a jesting smile but his tone was absolutely serious.
Maekar looked at him with an angry gleam in his eyes. In that moment, he looked like his grandfather. "They do exist. I saw it happen."
That declaration stopped the room. With the exception of his wife, everyone looked at him. "Are you japing, Maekar?" Aegon asked him.
He looked at the kings. His eyes were no longer angry but they were serious. "No, Father. I'm not. It was an ambush for one of the last groups of Free Folk. We were guiding them to the Wall when the wights attacked us. Two Others were there, watching from the back. They only came to the fight when we were tired from the wights."
"You were there?" Margaery asked a horrified voice speaking.
He nodded. "I was, Mother. The Lord Commander was escorting the group personally and I rode alongside him. He dispatched one of the Others but the second one reached Quentyn and clawed his eyes. Quentyn was able kill it with his dragonglass spear but his eyes were ruined."
Trystane looked sick as he listened. "Seven save us." Oberyn had the same look, but tinged more with sadness. Rhaenys wondered what he was regretting.
"We all thought he would die when he lost his eyes. But he recovered and continued to fight."
"Wait, he can still wield his spear?" Oberyn asked.
Maekar nodded. "He's just like Symeon Star-Eyes. Some of the Watch and Free Folk wanted to call him the Blind Snake after that. But Pyp, one of the Rangers, gave him a better name: Rattlesnake."
"Rattlesnake," Rhaenys thought to herself, testing the name again and again in her head. It was good name. She knew of the rattlesnake. "Was he named because he would give a warning before he fought?"
"Actually, it was because when Quentyn tried sharpening his spear afterward being blinded, Pyp said that it sounded like a rattlesnake giving off a warning before striking."
"What was that woman with him?" Daenys asked. She touched her chestnut hair self-consciously. "She was beautiful." She looked at Dalla. "Is she really your mother?"
"Yes," Dalla answered.
"So, are you Quentyn's daughter?"
She laughed. "No, I'm not."
Rhaenys's niece was confused. "Then who is?"
"I don't know. Does it matter?"
Now she was horrified. "Of course it matters."
"Why should it? I never met the man and my mother never told me who it was." She spoke as if she didn't care. Rhaenys was surprised by the words. She would've thought that every child would care about who their parents were. Then again, she had known who both her parents were.
"What is your mother to Quentyn?" Trystane asked her.
She looked at him, obviously thinking about something. Her brow funneled into confusion. She looked at Maekar. "What's that word you told me about? The one about a man sleeping with a woman that wasn't his wife?" she asked him.
"Paramour?" he asked back.
She nodded. "That's it. She's his paramour."
Rhaenys was surprised by that. So were the others. Perhaps the one most surprised was Oberyn. "Paramour?" he repeated. "She's Quentyn's paramour?"
Maekar nodded. "Apparently, he's rather good with his hands."
Oberyn looked at him for a long moment. Then he started to laugh. It was a laugh from his younger days, back when Uncle Doran was still alive and he wasn't helping Arianne rule Dorne, when he was free to go where he wanted. His laughter died down as he looked at his nephew. "It appears I've underestimated your brother," he said. "I will have to apologize to him."
Aenar frowned in concentration. He must be thinking about something, possibly something about laws. He would make a good Master of Laws one day. "I thought the Night's Watch was forbidden from taking wives?" he asked.
"They are," his brother told him. "But there's a loophole."
"A loophole?" he repeated, clearly not believing it. "How could there be a loophole?"
"It took the War Maester and Rattlesnake to figure it out. It was in the oath of the Watch. They can't take any wives or father any children. Nothing was said about 'other activities' as the War Maester put it. So the Lord Commander declared so long as they were careful and not fall in love, the Watchmen were free to sleep with whoever they want."
"Why do you call the War Maester the War Maester?" asked Baelor. "Did he go to the Citadel?"
A sad look crossed his and his wife's face. They must have loved Sam Tarly and miss him. "He was supposed to," Maekar said. "But with all that happen and the…incident, he was forced to stay at the Wall. He learned everything he could from the books in Castle Black, the rest he figured out and wrote down."
"What incident?" Rhaenys asked him. Did something happen at the Wall?"
For once, her nephew didn't answer. He looked uncomfortable. "It's not my place to say."
"Where's that dragon?" Dalla asked, looking at Maekar. "I thought you said there was a dragon here."
"I said there might be a dragon here," he told her patiently.
Aegon said, "We sent word to Daenerys that you were coming south from the Wall. Hopefully she will come but her time in Essos is consuming."
He understood but asked, "We heard about her war but we never heard how it began."
Dark frowns appeared on the faces of all the adults there. They didn't like to remember it. "A Ghiscari slaver attacked her party while they were in Essos," Maekar's father told him. "He didn't survive the attempt but it made Daenerys angry and determined. She decided to end slavery once and for all. After she tricked Astapor into giving her the Unsullied and freed the slaves, all the Iron Throne could do was send her Westerosi men to aide her."
"One of which was my husband," Rhaenys thought. A man who could not bear to look at their child's grave and too hungry for glory to care about her. "When Braavos heard of her war," she found herself speaking, "They joined her in fighting. They helped her in making a new treaty with the Free Cities, reducing the trade of slavery to all but nothing." Their support had been a surprise but one that had been accepted.
"I don't think Rhaegar was ever more proud of her before the treaty was signed," said Aegon. Of course, he and his sister knew it was hard not to be proud of a dragon rider changing the world again.
The Watchmen and the wildings stayed for the night and the next day. The day after, they would return to the Wall. The wildings were told that if they wanted to stay, they could. None of them did, not even when the ladies of the court started giving them eyefuls.
Their last night, Aegon gave them a feast. Rhaenys sat by Maekar's side with his wife on his other side. She was technically eating the food in front of her but she was also watching the Watchmen. More specifically, she was watching their Lord Commander.
Jon Snow ate quietly and talked to his men just as quietly. He had welcomed Maekar when he came to the table but he did not extend his attention to anyone else. He had kept to himself for the visit, welcoming other people who weren't his with some reluctance. When the wildings took to the training yard to show their skills, people had also hoped to see the Dualfang again. He did not.
She noticed something else. He was trying hard to not look anywhere but his table. She watched him trying hard not to look up. She understood. He did not want to look up at her. "Does he regret what he did?"
She didn't hope that he did. Those kinds of emotions were long since gone. But she knew that she wanted him to see her, to talk to her again. An idea came to her. The song he had written. He had finished it and left it for her. She had learned it and practiced it until she knew every note. The times she had sung it could be counted on one hand, most for her Daeron.
Bur now, now she had a chance to show him what the song sounded like, and to show him what she still felt for him. She left the table and went to the musicians playing the corner. She spoke to them quietly. Once they agreed, she spoke to the herald. He banged his staff against the floor, silencing the hall. "The Princess Rhaenys wishes to sing a song in honor of the king's guests."
She went back to the musicians and stood beside them. All eyes were on her. She waited for the music to begin. As she heard the opening notes, she sang.
I hear your voice on the wind
And I here you call out my name
'Listen my child', you say to me
'I am the voice of your history
Be not afraid, come follow me
Answer my call and I'll set you free'
I am the voice in the wind and the pouring rain
I am the voice of your hunger and pain
I am the voice that always is calling you
I am the voice, I will remain
I am the voice in the fields when the summer's gone
The dance of the leaves when the autumn winds blow
Ne'er do I sleep throughout all the cold winter long
I am the force that in springtime will grow
I am the voice of the past that will always be
Filled with my sorrow and blood in my fields
I am the voice of the future
Bring me your peace
Bring me your peace and my wounds, they will heal
I am the voice in the wind and the pouring rain
I am the voice of your hunger and pain
I am the voice that always is calling you
I am the voice
I am the voice of the past that will always be
I am the voice of your hunger and pain
I am the voice of the future
I am the voice
I am the voice
I am the voice
I am the voice
As the song ended, she waited. The hall applauded her, praising her voice and song. She looked at Jon Snow. His eyes were wide with surprise and recognition. She smiled as they looked at each other. The faintest hint showed on his before he looked away.
As she walked back to the table, she saw that her nephew had a gleam in his eyes. "Lord Snow," he said, standing up as she sat down. "Could you grace the court with one of the songs you've written?"
She saw the disbelief and disregard in everyone's eyes. They didn't think the Wall or the Night's Watch had any songs. They thought if there were any, they would be crude and barbaric. But she knew that Jon would have written a song that would prove them wrong. "My son is right," Aegon said. "I remember your singing from Riverrun, Lord Commander. Please, give us the gift of another one."
He didn't answer with words. After a paused moment, he nodded in agreement. He stood up and oddly enough, so did the rest of his group. Maekar joined them as they walked to a clear space next to the musicians. Jon spoke quietly to them. Some of them placed their instruments down. The others started to play a slow note, nothing like she had heard at the start of a song.
As the note grew and then faded, Jon started to sing and the rest of them sang too, following him.
Oh...oh...h...
Hey...
Yeah...
I've been wanderin' 'round in the dark
Been lost somewhere where no light could shine on my heart
I have known a pain so deep
But I know my faith will free me
[Get there] And I'll get through this
[Get there] I'll find my way again
So don't tell me that it's over
'Cause each step just gets me closer
(I will get there) I will get there
(I will get there) I will get there somehow
Cross that river (Cross that river)
Nothing's stoppin' me now
I will get through the night (Oh, yes, I will)
And make it through to the other side
(Get there) Get there
(Get there) Get there
I've been in these chains for so long
I'll break free and I'll be there where I belong
Hold my head up high, I'll stand tall
And I swear this time I won't fall
[Get there] I will do this
[Get there] No matter what it takes
'Cause I know no limitations
And I'll reach my destination, I will get there
I will get there (I will get there)
I will get there (Ooh) somehow (Somehow)
Cross that river (Cross that river)
Nothing's stoppin' me now
I will get through the night
And make it through to the other side
(Ooh, get there) Get there
(Get there) Get there
Well, the night is cold and dark
But somewhere the sun is shining
And I'll feel it shine on me
I'll keep on tryin', I'll keep on tryin'
I will get there (I will get there)
I will get there somehow
Cross that river (Cross that river)
Nothing's stoppin' me now
I will get through the night
And make it through to the other side
Get there, get there
I will get there (I will get there)
I will get there somehow (Somehow)
Cross that river (I'll cross that river for you)
Nothing's stoppin' me now (Oh...whoa...I)
I will get through (Through) the night
And make it through to the other side (Oh...ho...oh...ho...)
(Get there) Get there
(Ooh, get there) Get there (Whoa...oh...)
I will get there (I will get there)
I will get there somehow (Somehow)
Cross that river (I'll cross it for your love)
Nothing's stoppin' me now (No matter what)
I will get through the night (I will get through the night)
And make it through to the other side
(Get there) Get there
(Ooh, get there) Get there
Get there
Oh...ho...oh...
I'll get there
As they finished, the court was stunned into silence. Rhaenys couldn't blame them. She was just as shocked. Never in her life had she thought that snapping fingers would be used as a musical instrument. When the court finally applauded, Jon Snow looked proud of what they sang. He smiled and the smile made him happier and handsomer, like it did in Riverrun. Seeing that smile, Rhaenys felt her heart skip a beat, something she never thought she would feel for him again.
That night, she made a choice. She knew what rooms they had given the Lord Commander inside Maegor's Holdfast. Taking what secret passages she knew of in the keep, she emerged into the parlor room from behind a false wall. She approached the bedroom quietly. She saw the wolf sleeping near the fireplace. When its red eyes opened and saw her, she froze. For a moment, she wondered if it would raise the alarm. But after a moment of looking, its eyes closed again and went back to sleep. She breathed a little easier.
The door was closed but opened without a sound. She looked inside. Jon slept in the bed with a hand on the pillow. She didn't see any clothes on the floor but she knew that he never could hold to the heat of the city well. He was most likely naked beneath the sheets. Her throat a little dry at that thought.
She stepped closer to the bed and looked at his face. The moonlight shined down on him like it had all those years before. His hair was free from the knot and it framed his face. Seeing him asleep like this, so unguarded, he looked different. He looked so much younger, less the man he was and more the boy he had been. For a moment she was taken back to Riverrun by that face. What they had wasn't a love song but now to her, it felt close enough.
She reached out to touch him and his eyes snapped open. The world suddenly became a blur and she found herself against the bed with a dagger to her throat. Jon practically straddled her, looking ready to slice her throat. But he stopped short. "Princess?" he asked, his eyes losing his grogginess.
Even with the dagger pressing against her flesh, she wasn't afraid. "Hello, Jon," she said. "Haven't I told you to call me Rhaenys?"
He pulled the dagger away and got off her. "What are you doing?"
She sat up and came to the edge. There she sat down beside him. "It's been two days and we've not talk to each other. I never thought you would be so cold to me."
"I…didn't know what to say to you," he said quietly. "After…"
"After what?" she asked, "After you ran away from us, from me? After you fled on our wedding day?" He didn't say anything to that but he didn't let himself look ashamed of what he did. If anything, he looked as if he would accept whatever punishment given to him. But she wasn't going to punish him. "It's alright, I don't blame you. It's been too long for that. I can even see why you would do it."
He glanced at her. "Can you?"
"Yes, I can." Now she knew that if he had stayed, the North would've rebelled. Another war would've been fought to get him back. It would've been another War of the Usurper. Those who didn't die in the battles might've died from the loss of foods or diseases. What Jon did when he fled was stop that war from happening. He did it for the good of the realm.
She also knew it was why he went to the Wall instead of Winterfell. However, she still had a question. "But I would like to know why you didn't try running back to Winterfell. Surely Lord Eddard would've protected you. Were you afraid if you went back, he would tell you the truth?" She could understand if that was the reason why he didn't go there. He didn't answer her, instead staring at the floor. "Jon," she said, "You can tell me."
For a long moment, he still didn't say anything. "I was more afraid of what would happen between me and Lady Stark," he answered her question. "It's why I've never gone back to Winterfell."
As soon as he said those words, she knew what he meant. She had seen the relationship between him and Lady Catelyn. He wasn't afraid of learning the truth from Lord Stark. He was afraid of what that truth might do to the two of them. If what her father had said until he died was the truth, than Lady Catelyn would've been cold to a nephew, not her husband's bastard son. Lady Stark was still alive, same as Lord Stark.
"Princess—"
"Jon, call me by my name," she told him.
He looked at her for a long moment. "Why are you here?"
She smiled mysteriously. She had found it works wonders if she did that. "Why do you think I'm here?"
"I…I heard that you were married."
The smile vanished. She wondered how he knew that. Then she remembered that news does come to the Wall, however long it might take. And the wedding of a princess would reach them. "I was."
"…Was he a good man?"
"I thought he was. But it turned out he was more in love with glory and deeds than me." She didn't have much hope when she was told she would be married to him. But she still tried to love him. "He went to aid Dany in fighting the slavers. He died."
"You don't miss him." He didn't ask the question.
She felt angry at his voice. Did he mean to judge her? He didn't have the right. "He left because he couldn't stand living where our son had died."
Jon Snow didn't respond to her angry. He responded to her pain. "I'm sorry. I know what it is like to lose someone you love."
She heard the pained anguish he spoke with. He had lost someone, someone who was more than his comrade. He lost someone he cared for, loved even. A little pang of jealously hit her heart at that. It felt wrong. They weren't young anymore. She shouldn't feel jealous like this. "Who was she?" she asked.
He was surprised. "How…?"
"I know," she told him. "Was she a wilding?" It made the most sense.
He nodded quietly. "She was. Her name was Ygritte. She was a spearwife with Mance Rayder's army. We…we became lovers when I was ordered to spy on them. She died when they assaulted the Wall, killed by an arrow from above." His voice was still filled with pain. "I never knew who it was fired that arrow. For all I know, I could've been the one."
If she had been younger, she would've been jealous of this girl. She might've been glad that she was dead too. But now she didn't. "I'm sorry." She reached out and touched his shoulder. It was warm to her touch. He didn't shy away from her touch. She looked at his skin. There were scars on his body. "Just how long have you been fighting?"
"Practically since I arrived at the Wall," he said. "I lost a lot of men, some I've considered friends. Ser Daemon Sand, Ned, Tommen," he listed off only a few names. "A lot more have been wounded, some horrifically so."
"Quentyn," she said, her cousin's covered eyes coming to her mind, "His eyes."
"They weren't clawed. I saw the Other press its hands against his eyes and he screamed. The Other was killed but we all watched Quentyn's eyes turned blue." He couldn't look at her, only at the floor. "We had no choice to stop whatever was happening. There was only one thing to do."
Horror filled her stomach. "You tore out his eyes?"
"We had to. It was the only way to save him." He shuddered. "I can still see the poker glowing in the dark room, the smell of hissing flesh. I wish I didn't have to do that."
She was horrified, not at what he had done, but why it had to be. If they had to take out his eyes, the only way to prevent him from dying would be to cauterize the wound. Suddenly, she wished she hadn't learned how to treat wounds from the Grand Maester before she had married. "Has he ever blamed you?"
"No. But sometimes I think that should've been better."
She heard his voice be choked with tears. There was something else there. What was it? "Jon, what is it?" she asked him, "Tell me."
"Sam," he told her.
That was all she had to hear. She remembered how they were friends back in Riverrun. All these years at the Wall, they would've been like brothers. And he blamed himself for what happening to him. "It's not your fault he died," she told him. "You said it yourself, he rode into battle."
"It is my fault. I should've stopped him from riding out to save Gilly and her son. He wasn't a warrior. It was practically a miracle that he had survived until the end." A suppressed sob racked his body. She felt it through her hands. "I should've known. I should've seen it was all a trap for him. I should've seen that Other lying in wait. I could've pulled Sam out of that spear's path."
The more he talked, the more she realized what happened up there. And the more she listened, the more she felt sorry for him. She reached around and hugged him. "I'm sorry," she told him. He reached out and clasped her hand, holding onto it like his line to safety. They sat together like for a long moment.
Jon Snow turned his head to look at her. She couldn't remember who it was moved first. What she did know was that they started kissing. As she kissed his lips, she smelled him. Even though he had been in the city for the past two days, he smelled of snow and wood smoke. A fire, a need, began to burn in her stomach. She knew what it was. She didn't try to stop it.
But Jon pulled away. "We can't," he whispered in a hoarse voice.
"Can't we?" she asked him. "We're here, now. I know the Watch has looked at its oath a little differently. You must've slept with plenty of women."
"No, only Ygritte," he said.
She wasn't surprised by his denial. What she was surprised by how long it had to have been for him. "Why?"
He couldn't look at her. His eyes fell to the floor. "You know why."
He didn't say it but she knew what he meant. "Still?" she asked. "After all this time? After Ygritte?"
His head stayed there, not looking at her. Then it rose up and he looked her in the eyes. "I never stopped."
She kissed him again. His attempts to stop her were feebler this time. Soon he started kissing her back. Her hands reached out and touched him, feeling his chest underneath her palms. It was as warm as his shoulder. She could feel the muscles he had made from the years of fighting. She enjoyed the feeling, just like she enjoyed his hands on her hips. It felt right.
His lips moved down her jawline to her neck. Her head lifted up to the ceiling, her lips parted in a silent gasp. Gods, what he was doing to her neck. She didn't want it to end. It made them fall to the bed. A breathless little giggle escaped her lips. It was a long time since she felt like this.
But Jon stopped what he was doing. It left her confused. He hovered over her, his body obvious for her eyes. She drank it in like a thirsty woman having water. But there was hesitation in his eyes, and doubt. "Are you sure?" he asked her. "If we—"
He was thinking of her. It was endearing. But she didn't want to stop. She lifted up and pushed him down. She stood up from the bed so he could see. She had worn a robe when coming here but she had left it outside. Now she wore all were her smallclothes. Her hands reached up and pulled at the straps on her shoulders.
She stood naked in front of him. It wasn't the body of a young woman he saw, but the body of a mother, something that had carried life and gave birth to it. But he looked at her body with love, love that she had wanted all this time. "Do you want to stop?" she asked him.
He didn't say anything. He held a hand for her to take. She took it and he pulled her gently down to the bed.
The next morning, she and the royal family watched as the Night's Watch left the Red Keep and King's Landing. Maekar said goodbye to them all, exchanging a warrior's grasp with each man. He said quiet words to Jon before stepping away. Rhaenys said nothing but when she saw Jon's eyes find her, she smiled slightly at him. He showed the love in his eyes and that was it. That was all she needed.
She watched him as he led his men out of the courtyard. They would ride to the docks to board their ship back to Eastwatch. Once the formality was done, they all turned to go their separate ways. "Thank you, Aunt Rhaenys," Maekar said to her quietly.
"For what, Maekar?" she asked him.
"For whatever it was you did to Jon. When I was to return, he originally wasn't going to come with me."
"What changed?"
Her nephew was grim as he said, "An old seer from the Free Folk told him that it would be his last chance to go south of the Neck, to feel that warm again. She told him that he would die for what he served. His lifeblood would spill out against the snow of the true north. He came south for you, to see you one last time."
That was all he said. He left to go be with his wife and child. Rhaenys felt a chill in her stomach. She would never see Jon again? Why didn't he say anything to her? She stopped herself. She knew why. "He didn't want me to know it would be the last time." She walked to the godswood and stood before the heart tree.
She looked at the face and thought of Riverrun. She thought of the last night she had been alone with Jon. How they held each other in the night, thinking what they would never work. The last night now felt like that. She smiled sadly. She wouldn't grieve too deeply. Jon knew what he had been doing. So had she.
She touched the face. "Goodbye, Jon," she said to herself. She turned around and walked away, back to her life as she knew it.
End
Author's note: Thank you for all the reviews you've sent me.
Hmm, that's a bit of a jump, wasn't it?
Trust me I was never going to cover Jon's tenure at the Wall. That pretty much happen the way we all know it happened. Personally I always liked those chapters.
I know that I've put Dark Sister up North but I think that's what happened to it. Nobody knows what happened to it, except that its last owner was Bloodraven. It's all we've got to go on until Mr. Martin gives us more.
The first song was The Voice by Celtic Woman and the second was I will get there by Boyz II Men. I always felt the second song was appropriate for the Night's Watch. Thanks to them, they just black gospel music for Westeros.
Alright, we've got one last chapter before the story is done. If you were surprised or annoyed by this chapter, the next one should do more.
I'll see you all next chapter!