Chapter 23 – You
Heidi was frozen exactly where she was, not caring that she was standing stark naked in the middle of the warehouse and not caring that her fingers were stinging like hell as they continued to bleed. The only thing that was registering in her mind was the fact that she was looking directly into the familiar blue eyes of Adam Copeland.
She didn't even realise she was holding her breath until she swallowed hard, trying to rid her throat of that lump that had risen. Her breathing then returned to her and it was short and ragged as she refused to take her eyes off of the man she saw before her. It had been a long time since she'd laid eyes on Adam in the flesh and yet she knew that his eyes were familiar from even under that balaclava.
Heidi didn't know exactly what kind of emotion she should have been feeling and before she could even figure it out, Adam had broken her eye contact as he slowly walked a couple of steps towards her before bending down to the ground. Heidi watched as he picked up at the black balaclava that she had dropped moments earlier and he placed it in the back pocket of his jeans. He then bent down to pick up his black sweatshirt before he stood up and locked eyes with Heidi once more. He simply extended his arm and his sweatshirt to her and it was then when she realized she was completely naked.
It wasn't the first time he had seen her naked. If the leader raped her whilst Adam was on duty, he would always carry her naked body to the bathroom and let her clean up before he tied her back to the bedposts. It was different this time though and Heidi felt completely embarrassed that he was seeing her naked now, because he didn't have his balaclava on and she knew exactly who he was. She quickly pulled the sweatshirt over her head and let the large size swallow her skinny frame. She was relieved that the sweatshirt was large enough to hem on her at the level of her knees.
"Can you please come over to the bed and let me talk to you," Adam suddenly spoke, his voice shattering the silence and startling Heidi.
Hearing his voice was like a switch and suddenly Heidi realized how angry she was because she knew him. It would have been different if she had been wrong about those familiar blue eyes. It would have been different if the balaclava had revealed a person she had never seen before. A person she didn't even know, but it hadn't. Underneath the balaclava was a man that she knew. A man that had worked with her father and her mother. A man that had known her mother and father long before she was ever born or conceived. A man she had known since she was a little girl.
"On the bed where he just raped me?" Heidi spoke, trying desperately to hold back her tears and sound as angry as she felt right now.
Adam simply nodded at Heidi as he sighed and turned. Heidi watched him walk to one end of the warehouse and grab a couple of wooden chairs and a small round table. Without saying a word he dragged them across the wooden floor and set them up directly infront of her.
"Is this ok?" he asked calmly as he looked into her eyes.
Heidi wanted to cry. She was so confused as to why he was looking at her like that. She couldn't even explain what the look on his face was. She could see he was trying to remain calm but at the same time she saw the sadness in his face and the glossy reflection of the tears that were welling in his eyes. She knew she needed to be angry right now but something in her was so confused, so all she did was mentally remind herself to hold back her tears as she tentatively took a seat on one of the wooden chairs infront of her. She winced in pain as she sat on the hard wood of the chair. It was then she realized how bruised she felt between her legs. She closed her eyes tightly, trying to control her emotions as she waited for the pain to subside. She breathed deeply and slowly as she tried to relax, letting a few minutes pass before she opened her eyes.
She saw that Adam had retrieved his black backpack and had placed it on the small wooden table infront of her as he rummaged around inside. One by one he placed the items from the backpack on the table. A bottle of betadine, a bottle of water, packet of cotton balls and plasters. She knew they were for her fingers and yet for the first time she was hesitant to let him attend to her.
Adam motioned for her to give him her hands so he could treat her bleeding fingertips. Her hesitance showed as she refused to look him in the eye for a moment as she stared down at the blood on her hands. She was surprised it didn't hurt more than it should have. She started moving her fingers slowly and the odd sensation intrigued her as her fingers still felt completely numb. Hey eyes fixed on her fingertips. She could barely see the cuts that were causing the bleeding as they were still covered in layers of fresh and dry blood. She wondered for a moment how much blood she had lost since she came here. How much blood she had lost as a result of the torture she'd endured in this warehouse at the mercy of these men for a reason she still didn't know. She wondered how much blood she had lost as a result of her own doing and how much had been taken from her body like it wasn't even something that she possessed anymore.
"Please let me clean your fingers," Adam suddenly spoke, breaking Heidi abruptly out of her thoughts.
Heidi took a deep breath as she closed her eyes. The sound of his voice shattering the silence made the tears start to well up in her eyes again. Now that she knew whom the voice belonged to it made it that much worse. She closed her eyes tight once more, willing the tears back for a moment, before fixing her gaze on her fingers as she slowly offered them to Adam.
She could feel his gaze on her and she still refused to look up. It wasn't exactly like this news was something that was going to be easy for her to digest, so until she was able to at least get used to it she was going to do what was best for her.
Heidi watched as he soaked cotton ball after cotton ball with the water from his water bottle. He used those cotton balls to clean the cuts on her fingers of the fresh and dry blood settling on each fingertip. Heidi watched as a pile of wet, red stained cotton balls began to form to the right hand side of her on the old, cracked wooden table. She watched as one by one of her fingers became clean once again. Next was the betadine. Heidi watched intently as the yellowish brown solution was smeared across her cuts before they were covered with plasters. She focused her concentration intently on the whole process to distract her from the thousands of questions that were now running through her mind. The thousands of questions she had for Adam Copeland about why he was here and why she was here with him. There was nothing holding her back from asking all the questions in the world that she wanted – he would have to answer them all because she knew who he was now.
The fact that she knew his identity, however, wasn't stopping her right this second from starting her string of questions. She wanted to make sure she had mustered up enough courage and enough sanity to ask all her questions, remember all the answers and do so hopefully without shedding a single tear infront of him.
"Heidi," Adam suddenly spoke again.
"Don't even say my name," Heidi immediately replied as forcefully as she could muster.
Adam went quiet again. Heidi looked once more at her fingers and started to wiggle them again slowly. The numbing sensation was starting to fade and the pain was starting to set in the more she moved them. She wasn't sure that she would at any time again in her life have plasters on all 10 of her fingertips and for a moment she was distracted by how weird it looked. Her blue eyes then caught the movement of Adam and she watched as he picked up his water bottle, betadine, plasters and packet of cotton balls and placed them all back into his black backpack. The used cotton balls were placed in a small plastic bag and followed the other items into the backpack. She heard Adam sigh as he then clasped his hands infront of him, intertwining his fingers, as they came to rest on the table infront of him. A silence enveloped the room as they both sat in complete silence.
"I don't even know what to say," Adam suddenly spoke, clearly not being able to take the uncomfortable growing silence. Heidi sighed as she felt the anger switch inside her flip on. Without a moment of hesitation her eyes rose to meet Adam's as she leant back in her chair. It was clear to see that Adam was surprised by her clear sudden change in attitude, although Heidi could also see in his eyes that he knew he was lucky she was still mildly calm and hadn't done anything crazy yet.
"I want to explain because I know you deserve it, but I just don't know where to start," Adam spoke again, the words of honesty quickly tumbling straight out of his mouth "I just don't….you deserve to know everything I know that, but I just don't know…"
Heidi felt her heartstrings tug as she watched Adam struggle with his words. She hated herself for the way she was when it can to sympathizing with people. It was a blessing and a curse, and especially a curse in this situation. She wanted nothing more than to let the anger spill out of her mouth more bluntly, more rudely and more harshly than she could even imagine, but she knew that no matter how much she hoped for that, that wasn't her. She wasn't that girl and no matter how long she'd been here and how much she'd been tortured, she hadn't forgotten who she was. She was a girl with the kindest of hearts and she was that girl that felt the pain of others more than she wished she did most of the time. She was that girl that cried watching others cry, and that's why it was killing her to watch Adam Copeland sit before her trying to hold back his tears as his words stuttered and stumbled on their way out of his mouth.
"I just don't understand," Heidi suddenly spoke, knowing that if she took over the conversation she could compose herself because she would reduce the risk of seeing Adam break down infront of her. Adam nodded as his eyes looked down at his hands for a moment before looking up again at her.
"I don't fully understand why you're here either," Adam honestly replied.
"I don't believe that," Heidi replied, shaking her head "You know why I'm here."
"Yes I do," Adam nodded.
"You told me that those two are here because of my parents," Heidi stated, recalling what Adam had told her the last time she had asked him about it.
"And they are," Adam replied.
"Both of them?" Heidi asked, raising an eyebrow in Adam's direction.
Adam simply nodded again, knowing full well what Heidi's words meant. She wasn't satisfied with just that statement. She wanted more.
"I can't tell you who they are," Adam simply replied.
Heidi could feel the frustrating building up in her. She couldn't believe that he was still trying to pull this shit with her. Firstly because of all she had been through, and secondly because she now knew who he was and could absolutely use it against him if she wished it.
"And I didn't ask you yet to tell me who they are," Heidi replied, the sternness in her voice appearing again, trying to let him know that she was serious and that he should not misunderstand her "That doesn't mean you can't tell me exactly why they're here." Heidi watched as Adam opened his mouth to retaliate immediately to her request, before he quickly shut his mouth. He sighed as he grasped his hands together tighter in front of him before he spoke again.
"The old man is here because of Randy," Adam spoke.
"Because of my father?" Heidi asked, concentrating closely on Adam's choice of words, and making sure she got clarification on exactly what his words meant.
"Yes, because of your father," Adam replied with a nod.
"Does he have history with my father?" Heidi asked quickly, trying to get as much out of Adam as she could before he potentially realized how much was too much information to be giving to her.
"He doesn't talk about it at all," Adam replied simply "But yes, from what he's said, there is a lot of bad blood between them. He hates your father, but I have no idea why."
Heidi nodded as she quickly processed all of Adam's words before choosing her next question.
"And 'the leader'?" Heidi asked.
Adam gave her a look as the words left her mouth and Heidi knew it was because of her choice of words. It was all she ever referred to him as. 'The Leader'. She hadn't even thought for a moment that that was something strange, especially to Adam. Adam, however, pushed the thought to the back of his mind as he answered her question.
"He's here partly because he hates your father too," Adam replied "But mostly he's here because…"
"Of my mother right?" Heidi suddenly interrupted, finishing off Adam's sentence.
Adam sent her a look of confusion.
"I'm right aren't I?" Heidi asked, desperately wanting to know if her answer was correct.
Adam simply nodded.
"The hair dye wasn't exactly subtle," Adam replied as he looked at the fiery red colour of Heidi's hair "Especially when you look exactly like your mother."
Heidi had to hold her tongue. She had, at that moment, wanted to yell at him for making any kind of reference to her being her mother's daughter because it made her blood boil because it brought her back to the sick reality that was, right now, her life. She had then wanted to tell him that it wasn't just the hair dye that had given away the fact that 'the leader' was, and probably still is, infactuated with her mother. No, it was the fact that every time 'the leader' raped her, he would call her by her mother's name. He would call her 'Lita' every time he took her body for his own sick pleasure.
"I'm sorry," Adam suddenly, spoke, breaking Heidi out of his thoughts "I shouldn't have said that."
Heidi eyed him suspiciously before she realised he was apologizing for the comment he had made about her looking like her mother. It was almost like he was reading her mind.
"And I guess that leaves you then," Heidi spoke, brushing away the thoughts in her mind for a moment.
"I'm not here because of your parents," Adam repeated the same thing he had told her last time "Your parents were nothing but good to me."
"Then why the hell are you doing this?" Heidi immediately replied, she could feel the tears welling in her eyes so she tried to counter it by flooding her mouth with words and letting her anger build.
"I never knew that this is what was going to happen," Adam quickly replied "If I had I would have done everything in my power to not be here having this conversation with you right now."
"That's such bullshit Adam!" Heidi suddenly exclaimed, her anger swiftly rising as she leaned forward in her chair and stared daggers at Adam from across the table "That is such bullshit!"
"Heidi I promise you I never wanted to be any part of this," Adam replied.
"Don't you ever say my name again!" Heidi exclaimed, her voice getting louder.
"I'm sorry," Adam quickly replied, trying to tone down the situation by remaining as calm as possible "I never wanted you to get hurt. The last thing I ever wanted was to put you in danger."
"I remember running around backstage when I was 4 years old AND I TRUSTED YOU WITH MY LIFE!" Heidi suddenly screaming as she took to her feet and slammed the palms of her hands forcefully down on the table in front of her "MY PARENTS TRUSTED YOU WITH ME! THEY TRUSTED YOU!"
"I know they did," Adam replied, the frustration at himself growing in his eyes as a single tear rolled down his cheek "I know they trusted me with you. I know they trusted me, but I didn't have a choice."
"THAT IS FUCKING BULLSHIT!" Heidi screamed again, slamming her hands down on the table again, making the unstable wooden frame shake and rattle "YOU FUCKING HAD A CHOICE TO BE HERE AND YOU CHOSE TO BE! YOU CHOSE TO TAKE ME AWAY FROM ALL THE PEOPLE I LOVE AND FORCE ME TO STAY AND BE TORTURED IN THIS HELL HOLE!"
"I didn't have a choice Heidi," Adam spoke again, trying his best to explain to her what he meant.
"OF ALL THE PEOPLE IN THE WORLD THAT COULD HAVE BEEN UNDER THAT FUCKING BALACLAVA YOU WERE THE LAST I THOUGHT IT COULD BE!" Heidi continued to scream as she started frantically running her fingers through her hair as she stood there staring straight into the blue eyes of Adam Copeland "FOR THE LIFE OF ME I NEVER IMAGINED THAT I WOULD ACTUALLY KNOW WHO YOU WERE! THAT I WOULD ACTUALLY HAVE MEMORIES OF MY CHILDHOOD THAT YOU WERE IN! THAT I WOULD BE STANDING HERE TRYING TO UNDERSTAND WHY YOU WOULD LET ANYONE TOUCH A YOUNG GIRL THAT YOU HAVE KNOWN SINCE SHE WAS BORN! A GIRL WHO YOU USED TO BABYSIT UNTIL SHE WAS 4! A GIRL WHO USED TO THINK THE WORLD OF YOU!"
Heidi had felt the tears welling up in her eyes as she screamed and right now she didn't care that they were streaming down her face. She closed her eyes and let the tears just fall for a moment as she caught her breath. When she opened her eyes she saw tears matched in Adam's blue eyes.
"You and Christian used to take me to catering when I was 3 years old every morning night RAW," Heidi spoke, the tears still spilling down her cheeks "And you used to get me chocolate chip cookies and milk before dinner and you two used to make me promise…."
Heidi paused mid-sentence, closing her eyes tightly as the tears starting to stream down her face again.
"We'd make you promise you wouldn't tell your parents so we all wouldn't get in trouble because you'd spoiled your dinner," Adam spoke softly, finishing off Heidi's sentence.
Heidi opened her eyes and looked at Adam, whose head was now in his hands.
"Why haven't I seen you since I was 4?" Heidi spoke, the sympathetic side of her re-emerging and calming her down a little as her breathing started to settle.
"I fell out with your father just after the Wrestlemania, just after you turned 5," Adam answered, his head coming out of his hands slightly so his words weren't muffled "I got done for drugs. Well, steroids, and the worst part was that I wasn't just using, I was supplying to other WWE superstars. Your father and mother were, and I'm sure still are, very anti-drug and it caused a lot of tension between us. I was fired right after Wrestlemania on the same night I had a confrontation with your father about drugs I was using that actually came to blows. I walked out of the arena that night without a job, with the beginnings of a black eye, and a lost friendship between your father, mother and consequently you."
"I thought you said you weren't here because of my parents," Heidi stated, for a moment doubting the honesty factor in everything that Adam had told her up until this point.
"And I'm not," Adam quickly replied, his eyes finally rising to meet Heidi's "I'm not here because of your parents. Despite the falling out I had with your father, your father and mother are still good people and I would never dream of hurting them through you."
"Then stop beating around the bush for heaven's sake and tell me why you're here," Heidi sighed in frustration "Why the hell are you here if it's not because of my family?"
"I'm here because of my family," Adam replied.
Heidi would be lying if she said she wasn't completely taken aback by what Adam had said. Whether it was because of his reason for being here or whether it was because she had never even thought that he actually had a family. She wasn't sure which one it was. She felt herself sink back into her seat and the two sat in silence for a moment before Adam was the first to seat.
"I'm not here because of your family, or for the money the other two are demanding from your parents in exchange for you. I'm not here because of any of that," Adam explained "I'm here because of my family – my wife and my two daughters."
"Does he have something on you?" Heidi asked, trying to understand what Adam was talking about.
"After I left the WWE I continued dealing and supplying," Adam started "The only problem was that once I left sports entertainment I started expanding the type of drugs I was supplying. I needed something to bring in money for my family because I was jobless and it was quick, easy money no matter how dirty it was."
Heidi sat in silence as she listened to Adam's story.
"Eventually I found myself dealing to the wrong kind of people and pretty soon I found myself in a lot of trouble and debt because I had inadvertently screwed over the wrong people," Adam continued "I was lucky to be alive after it all but to make it all go away I needed more money and I didn't have it."
"He lent you money?" Heidi asked, finally understanding what Adam was getting to.
"A lot of money, which I still haven't paid back in full yet," Adam replied "The problem is that now he has it over me, plus the fact that he knows all about the illegal side to my supplying which could put me behind bars. I would deserve it, I know that, but being behind bars means no money for my family and they don't deserve that."
"That still doesn't make this alright," Heidi immediately replied, shaking herself out of sympathizing with Adam, as much as she felt it inside "I have been raped and tortured since I got here and I cannot believe you would sit back and let that happen when you have daughters yourself."
"And I shouldn't have sit back and let it happen I know," Adam sighed "I will always hate myself for it."
"And you should," Heidi replied softly "You may not have been in here raping me, but keeping me here knowing full well that he was raping me is just as bad." "I know," Adam replied "I thought that this was the right thing to do for the damage I've already cost my family and that was only because I thought I didn't have any other choice and because I didn't know what I was getting myself into."
"Stop, just stop," Heidi replied "I don't want you to keep justifying this to me because nothing is going to change my mind about this and I don't want to feel like your reason excuses you from the nightmare I've endured here for days on end now."
Adam simply nodded.
"For what it's worth, if it means anything to you now, and I wouldn't blame you if it didn't," Adam spoke softly and honestly as he looked Heidi straight in the eye to ensure her he meant what he was saying "I am so sorry for everything that you've had to go through because of them and because of me. You didn't deserve any of this and never think for a moment that you did. I am honestly so sorry that this is what has happened."
Heidi simply nodded, she wanted to tell him to shove his apology where the sun didn't shine but she knew in her heart that she, for the most part, believed it. She believed, for the most part, that he meant every word he had just spoken to her. She kept thinking about the Adam Copeland that she remembered from when she was a child and that made her want to believe that he was still a good person. That memory of Adam Copeland made her want to believe that he was truly sorry for everything that he'd inadvertently put her through.
"When you get out of here blame everything on me," Adam suddenly spoke, his voice completely serious. Heidi could hear it in his change of tone.
"Why would I do that?" Heidi asked, confused about the topic that Adam had changed to all of a sudden.
"Because I deserve it and if you do my family will be safe," Adam answered, his tone still remaining very serious.
"I don't really understand what you mean," Heidi replied.
"He'll know then that I haven't told you who he is and that will keep my family safe," Adam explained.
"You're not going to tell me who he is?" Heidi asked, suddenly realizing the stipulations on Adam's request to her.
"I can't tell you that," Adam sighed.
"After everything you've put me through?" Heidi asked, slightly shocked that Adam was still going to play that card with her.
"I wish I could tell you but I can't and I'm sorry for that because I know you deserve to know," Adam explained as he took to his feet, standing up from his chair.
Heidi followed suite and stood up from her chair. She then went to open her mouth before she stopped as she noticed Adam was doing something. She watched curiously as he dug deep into his right jean pocket. Her look of curiosity was replaced of one of mixed confusion and sheer joy as she watched him retrieve a small silver ring covered in that familiar leaf and vine pattern.
"Where did you….?" Heidi asked as she immediately reached out to grab the ring, even before Adam had offered it to her.
Adam immediately handed it over.
"It was your second night here and I noticed he'd taken it from you because it was sitting on the dashboard in his car," Adam explained "I took it and he didn't realise. I still don't think he knows that it's gone."
Heidi was only half listening as she carefully examined the ring to make sure she wasn't seeing things. The Bambi inscription on the inside of the silver band was hard to miss and when her eyes hit it she felt a joy inside her that she hadn't felt in such a long time. She remembered the night when the leader had taken it from her. She remembered how he'd tried to sexually harass her again and she'd refused him, physically and verbally. She'd gotten a slap straight across the face again and then he'd taken her ring to spite her. Maybe he thought that it'd make her more compliant the next night when he tried to force himself on her again but he was sorely wrong. She never thought she'd see that beautiful ring again and it had broken her heart when she had come to that conclusion all those nights ago because it was the only thing she had here of her parents. She couldn't explain the sheer joy she felt in her heart knowing that she actually had her ring back.
Heidi kept that joy in the front of her mind for the rest of the night and it made being tied up again by Adam a little more bearable. She went over in her mind again and again all the things that Adam had said to her and despite the fact that she had his identity over him, she wouldn't survive life without him in this place and for right now she had to stay here until she could figure out what the hell she was going to do to get out safely. It was the first of those ten words that Adam had spoken to her which were going to keep her up tonight despite how exhausted she was.
"When you get out of here blame everything on me"
A/N: AHHHH so sorry readers for the lateness in a new chapter – stupid busy life! So, unfortunately no one guessed Adam Copeland as 'the other guy', but no need to fret, I will definitely put some more guessing games in my next couple of chapters. I'll keep this short cause I'm super tired but hope you all enjoyed that chapter – any ideas on what is going to happen next? Are Randy and Lita going to pay the ransom? Is Heidi going to get out – and is she going to get some help getting out? Please don't forget to READ AND REVIEW and feel free to let me know what you think is going to happen next! Thanks so much for sticking with this story readers and I'll make sure that regular updates are on the agenda! God Bless, Mrs Bridget Orton xxxx