Shepard walked through the doors leading to Bellona's room, before stopping in her tracks. The sight before her broke her heart. As she went closer to her bed and took Bellona in her arms. She holds her and rubs her back in soothing way. She did not know what happened but the way Bellona was shaking so violently. She saw Miranda walking out of the hospital as she come in, Miranda looked as if she was crying but her face showed nothing.

''Bellona.'' She whispers against her hair. ''It's alright. It's going to be alright.''

''No.'' Bellona gasps, and it's choked by the sobs and the way she still just shaking. ''IT's not, Shepard.''

Bellona pulls away, sitting on the hospital bed with her knees pulled tight to her chest, her hand holding on a golden star shaped locket, she tries to wipe her eyes with the heel of one hand. ''I really don't want to talk about it. Are you here to take me to the Normandy?''

''Right.'' Shepard nods in understanding. ''Yes, you are going to be transferred to the Normandy and the doctor Chakwas will look at you.'' Shepard gives Bellona a soft smile. ''I fill up all the paperwork and now you are staying with us. I am going to send you all the data we collected while you were in hospital, read them, and then report to my room. We got a lots of work to do.'' Shepard says pushing herself of the bed and offering a helping hand to Bellona. ''I'll escort you to the Normandy.''

Bellona nods and takes the hand offered to her, swaying slightly and wincing in pain as she looks up at Shepard. ''Thanks Cap.''

After being checked by doc. Chakwas, and Shepard taking me to her room without asking any questions, Bellona feel grateful to her. Bellona always been a giver, warm and funny and most of all loving. When she was a child, her parents died when she was born and the only one she known all her life were people that surrounded her and keep her save until her guardian a close friend with her mother meet with a known man by the last name of Lawson. Her guardian worked for him, and than Bellona went through training, since young age, her biotics showed up when she was young and the guardian teach her how to use them, but not to depend on them too much.

Even as a child going through the gruesome training she never cried, she wanted to make others happy. She wanted others to look upon her and tell her how proud and happy they are.

The one thing she always hated was being lonely and no one to talk to. She worked hard so that she won't have to be. Guardian was always there, watching over her, and she liked it, loved it the way she would get the attention she wanted and learn. Make the guardian proud. When she was training her how to fight, she was scared, she never punched anyone before, until her guardian order her to fight one of the boys. She could not remember who threw the first punch, but soon her fist was slamming into the boys face while he punched her in the stomach, she gagged and saw blood pooled into his mouth. We took our breaths and went back straight to each others. The fight was messy, the boys was stronger than her, and overpowered her very fast. She fall on the hard floor, and she known that she had lost the fight she turned to look at her Guardian and she saw disappointed in her eye, and then she and the boy left and left her there, on the floor, alone. She was scared. Scared to fail. She did not want to be lonely.

Then the day had come when she met Miranda. She finally felt like she found hope. Hope that she won't be lonely anymore. She found a friend. And she promised to herself that she won't abound Miranda no matter what. They become friends and she was happy. Bellona promised Miranda to never leave her side and gifted her a star shaped locket with their picture in it. They both promised each other. And now...

Bellona shook her head as Shepard asked her if she want anything to eat. Instead asking for permission to use the shower. Shepard nodded her head and said that she will get her some clothes to wear.

Bellona slowly stepped into the shower, her body flinching as the lukewarm drops tricked down her back and stinging her wounds. Her mind was in shred. She bathed her skin lightly, taking care not to touch her wounds. As she finished her shower and got out, she saw her clothes on the bed and Shepard sitting at her desk writing report about something not even looking at her. Bellona was fine with that. She did not want to disturb her anyway.

Bellona dressed and sat down, and looked at Shepard. She respected Shepard, she was unfailingly kind, she always put others first and herself last. No matter how tired she was, she never let it show. Bellona's admiration for her was deep seated and long lasting.

For some unknown reason something made her talk. ''I admired everything about her, from the way she walked to the way breeze blew her hair.'' Shepard stopped writing and looked at Bellona and listened. ''I cherish her. I love the way she was and how much she was determed to be who she is, and decide for herself what she want to be. She always known what she wanted. Always.'' Bellona took a deep breath. '' But I never did. All I wanted was not to be lonely. To have a friend by my side. Someone who always will think about me when I am gone and miss me. Someone to share my secrets with. That was Miranda.'' Bellona whispered softly, she could feel tear slip down her cheek.

Shepard left her place at the table and went to Bellona side. Bellona looked at Shepard, her eyes looked so tired and in pain that Shepard wanted to find a way to help her. ''You loved her didn't you?''

Bellona smiled softly. ''It wasn't love between us in any romantic way, perhaps more fraternal than anything at first. She was the only woman I could ever admire. No mater how tough things got she always found a way out.''

Shepard put a hand on top of Bellona's. ''What about you're parents?''

Bellona shook her head. '' They died when I was a baby. I had been orphaned so young that I had no recollection of what it been like to have a parents. Perhaps that was a mercy.''

Shepard felt sorry for the woman in front of her, to never know parents love must been awful. ''There was no one who could take care of you?''

Bellona smiled at Shepard. ''There was. My guardian.''

Shepard felt relived that Bellona had someone after all to look out for her. '' Guardian?''

Bellona nodded. ''Yes, an asari my...mother friend, she took me in and helped to raise me. Helped me with my biotic's when they showed. She was a hard woman but fair.''

Shepard could hear the pain in Bellona voice, and for some reason she felt that there was more to the story that she knows. ''Were you close?''

Bellona snorted, ''No close per se, I just wanted her attention and make her proud of me. It was a long time ago. I am sure she forgot about me already. I was a burden to her, like I am to Miranda.''

Shepard frowned, she did not know what was said between them both, but she was sure that Miranda cared for Bellona. The way she acted when Bellona was injured and shot. ''Miranda care about you. When you were shot and injured, she lost her mind with worry over you, it was the first time I ever saw her cry and panic like that. She may not show it often and hide behind her mask, but deep inside she loves and cares for you.''

Bellona didn't believe Shepard, because she just could not see those moments that she speak of, all she can see is those words that Miranda said to her, angry and spiteful, if she cared than why did she say that she was worthless? Why did she shut her up when she only wanted to help? Did Miranda feel annoyed by her?

The more she though about it the more she felt panic start like a thighting of the chest, as if the muscles are trying not to let another breath in, but instead die. She could feel a hard painful lump in the back of her throat as tears began to form. Shepard eyes widen in panic as she broke down, hysterical sobs shook her broken frame, threatening to tear her apart from the inside. Bellona fought to reclaim control over her body, choked by the sounds escaping from deep within her chest.

She felt Shepard take her in her arms and rock her back and front, as she broke down, she just lay there in Shepard arms and staring at nothing, ''I am done. I can't take it anymore.''

Bellona known that Miranda was not at fault, it was her own fault. Fast desolate tears ran from her unblinking eyes and dripped into her nightshirt. Bellona faulted Miranda all this time, but instead before telling Miranda that its her fault she should have looked into mirror. The one who did not made it work was her, she just though that Miranda won't care what she did and never tell her off. She was a fool. She was blind by her selfishness that she did not see that Miranda was hurting as well.

Bellona could not stop crying, all she could do now is lay in Shepard arms and cry like a baby, she was pathetic.