Draw Me In

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Eighteen – Doin' It Right

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*~ I know you don't get a chance to take a break this often
I know your life is speeding and it isn't stopping ~*

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According to Alice, there are five stages in the run up to friendship. These are:

Stage 1 – Meeting

Stage 2 – Texting

Stage 3 – Chatting

Stage 4 – Sharing

Stage 5 – Grouping

I stare at these, each of which she's listed on a little whiteboard she has for whatever reason, accompanied by little diagrams of stick people. The one with the bright red face is me (ha ha, I'd said dryly, I'm going for realism, she'd countered back), while the one with the outrageously long air is TS (realistic, I'd said, Chandler-sarcastic, you would know, she'd responded smugly).

I feel myself zoning out as she taps on the board with a . . . a board stick thingy (where is she getting this stuff?), and I've almost completely blotted her out when there's a sharp thwack on my nose.

"Ow!" I rear back away from her, cupping my nose and jerking till my head hits the sofa. I stare at her frowny form wide-eyed.

"Are you even listening to me?" she asks crossly, folding her arms and glaring.

I wince as I pull my hand away from my face, going cross-eyed as I attempt to look at my nose. "Trying not to."

That deceptively sharp stick strikes again.

"Stop it, crazy!" I quickly dodge to the left, raising my palms in defence which actually turns out to be a really bad idea. "I'm the one who should be mad at you! And you're hitting me with a metal stick!" Somehow, I manage to wrestle the weapon off of her, and in a panic, I just decide to sit on it.

Her eyes grow round, and I feel a momentary bout of sadistic satisfaction.

"Bella!" My name comes out as a high-pitched whine.

I just stare at her until she flops onto the sofa next to me. "I told you I was sorry about that," she huffs, turning her head to face me. "It just slipped out."

I squint at her, but her pleading-puppy eyes crack me.

"I forgive you for the security breach," I say seriously, heaving out a large sigh for good measure. "I'm just not sure why all of this – " I gesture to the board, to those stick figures. " – is necessary."

She smiles. My eyes narrow. "Friends helps friends get friends," she says, not a bit patronising, throwing in a little hand pat just because.

I can't even bring myself to be offended, because I'm clearly not an expert in this department.

So instead I just lift my bum and hand her her stick of doom back, which she takes very reluctantly. When she's bounced back to the board, I say, with genuine trepidation, "I don't like the sound of the last one."

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I take a breather when Alice gets a call from her mum, escaping back to my room while my friend suffers from the tinny sounds of disappointment floating down the line. I feel bad for her, really. But it's too late for me to save her now.

Lying back on my bed, I let out a great long sigh, my mind inevitably running back over the past few days.

After Edward had left that night – with awkward goodbyes that didn't know how to be said – I'd collapsed onto the sofa, and sat staring at the wall until Alice and Rose came lumbering in at around 2ish. It was only when they'd rounded the corner and switched on the lights – stepping forward with concerned, blurry faces that I realised I'd been crying.

It wasn't sadness that pushed them past – well, not for the most part, anyway – but the feeling of being overwhelmed and not knowing how to deal with it. When I was younger, I was so easy to set off, but growing up I thought I'd learnt to deal with it in other ways. I was nervous a lot, but it seemed like forever since I'd actually cried.

My words had come out gasping and nonsensical to Alice's and Rose inquiries, so for a while I'd just sat there between them, my head on Rose's shoulder, my hand in Alice's, feeling like the child I used to be.

Alice had looked genuinely repentant when I'd told them, Rose had looked peeved, and guilt had quickly replaced my tears as I realised I was probably raining on their parade a little. When I'd started to ask about their night, Rose had shut down my deflection with a roll of her eyes and a –

"They're just men, Bella."

So I'd pretty much told them everything – not that there was a lot to tell, really (though for me it was). By the end of it I'd felt better, like I'd been harbouring this secret, and the relief of telling it was like letting a lead weight off of my chest. We'd also somehow managed to end up watching so many reruns of friends with the extra cake they'd brought home from their fancy restaurants (which ensued in – "So you actually went to a restaurant?" "Yeah, but a nice one.") Until we all passed out at about 6ish.

It took me a few days but I eventually worked up the cojones to turn on my mobile. I was immediately assaulted by a host of vibrations, but I just went ahead and barged on through before I lost my nerve.

I had 5 new messages from TS.

My eyes grew round. With a little intake of air, I opened the first one.

I'm sorry if I weirded you out.

My eyes caught the date. It was sent the day after his: you're everywhere.

Swallowing, I'd figured that one was harmless enough and moved onto the others.

Can I call you? I know this is a little unorthodox… I'm sorry.

I wish I could explain, but it's so hard to write down.

Please talk to me.

And then the last:

I'm sorry. Again. But I'm here. You can slam the door in my face if you want, but I need to try.

I'd just stared at my phone for a while, heart racing.

It was that word.

That need.

"Bella!"

I jump, shaking myself back to reality.

"Coming!" I yell back, rising and accidentally glancing towards my bedside table – at the little device I haven't moved since then.

My hand hovers mid-air. Would it be so bad if I –

No. I snatch my hand back quickly, diverting my eyes once more. It's remained mute since he left – no more texts, just the memory of his voice – and mine – agreeing to be friends.

"Okay. I'll be your . . . friend."

"You will?"

Shaking my head at myself, I quickly leave my room and walk back to Alice. She's standing by the board, tap tap tapping away on her phone with a smile on her face. It makes me smile to see it, and when she looks up she twinkles and sparks – all in the bright sunny blue of her eyes.

"So," she says happily, "what stage where we on?"

I can only grin.

Because if nothing else, my friends are excellent at making the overwhelming disappear.

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A/N: :)

Light, easy, breezy chapter. Probably because I started listening to Daft Punk in the midst of writing it. ;) Probably also a nice relief after all the exhausting of the last few chapters, eh? Very sorry it took so long to get here! But more very soon!

Thank you for reading. :) xo