Author's Note: Suggestions courtesy of MISCrasyaboutfanfics: Rules #61-64. Enjoy!

Rule #61: Food fighting is not allowed.

(Optimus and Galloway don't want any food wasted because of having a tight budget for NEST.)

(It wasn't me who started the last food fight!)

(Leo started it, trying to rediscover his "inner child" and relive his memories from elementary school.)

(All those involved had to clean it up.)

Rule #62: Optimus would like me to remind everyone not to swear in front of Annabelle.

(She overheard Sunstreaker using a Cybertronian swearword, the one that's the equivalent to the human word sh*t.)

(She repeated it when Ironhide wouldn't let her paint on him.)

(It makes it even worse 'cause the rec room was full of people and Autobots.)

(She said Sunstreaker taught her the new word in her vocabulary.)

(No one, especially Arcee and her sisters, was happy.)

(Ironhide wanted to use Sunstreaker for target practice.)

(If the weapons specialist was a human, he would've had an aneurism. He actually had to be restrained by Optimus!)

Rule #63: Speaking of femmes, stop calling Bluestreak a girl!

(Doesn't help that he has a large chest and that one of the humans was singing "Dude Looks Like A Lady" when Bluestreak walked into a room one day.)

(Needless to say, the poor mech was upset.)

(Annabelle gave him a hug and said that he shouldn't worry about "dumb, mean people.")

(Anna is such a sweetheart. X3)

Rule #64: Water balloons are banned.

(Wheeljack made a giant one that exploded and flooded the base.)

(The humans near the place the water balloon exploded had to be sent to Ratchet for the injuries they received from the force of the water slamming them into the walls and other furniture.)

(He got a lecture for wasting water.)

(In case these guys haven't noticed, Earth is covered in water.)

(In fact, Wheeljack used sea water to fill that big ass balloon!)

(There's more where that came from!)

Rule #65: Pessimism can actually be used to your advantage.

("Despite the forgivable ignorance of this savage horror we call humanity, you are the damned limit of my tolerance. You were likely raised by imbeciles, poorly prepared for adulthood, capable only of perpetuating your genetic flaws. What tragedy it is not to be smart enough to know you are doomed to live and die in a painful idiocy."— me, halfway through a rant Galloway was giving during a conference.)

(Optimus was shocked I even said it.)

(The others snorted rudely and laughter erupted from all corners of the room.)

(Galloway looked ready to have an aneurism.)

(Being one of the only few people who can just barely tolerate Sunstreaker's vanity issues and Skids and Mudflap's perverseness and all their dirty jokes, I snapped at them: "I wish...I truly wish someone would just...turn you off and...fix you.")

(After going through the whole day like this, I was given some semblance of sugar.)

("I HAVE POWERS PINTO BEANS CAN ONLY DREAM OF HAVING! BWAHAHAHAHAHA!"— me, being random and feeling I needed to scream.)

(Ironhide had half a mind to drag my ass to the Med Bay for testing after that outburst.)

(He couldn't reach me even if he wanted to 'cause I crawled into the human sized ventilation shafts. Ha ha!)

Rule #66: Screaming at Ratchet doesn't get you anywhere with him. Especially not during mental health exams.

("End this pathetic deception! I know you've got Martians in your head! Gimme them Martians! I'm going to put butter on them!"— Hyper Riley, in the middle of getting an injury treated with Ratchet after having a run-in with one of Wheeljack's experiments.)

(Ratchet reacted rather rashly and strapped her down to the table and sedated her.)

(When she woke up, Riley found she was still strapped to the table with a camera in her face in a human sized room.)

(Ratchet explained she was going to be under observation for the next two days.)

(Riley freaked out.)

(One month of being stuck in the Med Bay having an ass load of tests and mental exams done.)

("I LOVE YOU, COLD UNFEELING ROBOT ARM!"— me, getting the drop on Prowl in his office. I swear he jumped a mile in the air and fell out of his seat and glitched.)

("No. I'm still watching it, I wanna see what happens! I need it! WHHHHHHYYYYYYYYYYY?!"— Riley, upon Prowl walking in on her and Wheeljack watching Phineas and Ferb and turning off. She ran around the room crying and screaming insanely before she fell on her face asleep.)

("BLARGIZEFLURZINFLURRSENUR!"— me, being random and running around the room with my hands in the air.)

(Riley and I were hauled into the Med Bay for more mental health exams. What's sad is it hadn't been twenty four hours since Riley got out of there.)

(This place is like our second home since we're here so often.)

(Somebody get us out of here! DX)