Of Dads and Surrogates
New York City always had hustle and bustle. But, for Rachel Berry, she had no desire to join in the go-go-go atmosphere of her adopted city. She couldn't - not at almost 9 months pregnant with the baby due any day now.
When she had first offered to be the surrogate mother to her friends Blaine and Kurt's child, they had been as shocked as she had been coming to the decision. But, Rachel had wanted to find some way to repay them for all they had helped her with in her life. Also, it seemed a fitting full circle to how she was raised by two gay dads after being born to her biological mother, Shelby Corcoran.
Suddenly, Rachel felt her water break, followed by a debilitating wave of contractions that almost sent her toppling off her sofa. She screamed for her husband, Jesse St. James, who came running.
"Looks like I'm calling the boys" he said, and ran to phone the fathers-to-be. He then helped Rachel out of their apartment and into the car, where they sped for the hospital.
Meanwhile, Blaine and Kurt were enjoying a barbecue at their place with old friends from the Glee Club, including Sam Evans, Mercedes, Artie, Tina, coach Will Schuester and his wife and kids. Just then, Blaine's cell phone rang.
"Hello?" His face instantly went white and in an extremely measured voice, he replied. "Yes, Jesse. We're on our way." He hung up. "Rachel's water broke!"
Mercedes shrieked, and Will and Sam made to corral the kids into the Schuester's vacation RV. "Come on now, round them up, round them up, let's go!" Artie called as Tina lifted his wheelchair into the van. Everyone piled haphazardly in and Will started the ignition. They flew through the busy city streets…almost dangerously, which Sam pointed out to Will.
"You just did an illegal U-turn there, Mr. Schue," he noted. Will ignored him before turning into oncoming traffic and swerving to avoid other cars as they went up in the opposite direction. "This is a one-way street, Mr. Schue," Sam protested nervously.
"Mr. Evans? Shut up!" Will snapped. Honestly, he was so anxious to get there, one might have thought it was his baby being born.
When they reached the hospital, everyone tumbled out of the RV and raced inside. "Hey! Wait for me!" Artie called, even as Tina carefully hung back to lower him to the ground. The receptionist directed the rag-tag band to a room far down the hallway. Rachel was waiting, panting, screaming bloody murder and holding Jesse's hand so hard, his fingers looked in danger of coming off. Blaine took over Jesse's perch as he and Kurt flanked her.
"Bout time you two got here," she growled.
"We came as quickly as we could," Kurt explained. "Mr. Schuester even broke every traffic law known to man so we could get here on time."
"Driving against the flow of traffic…never seen anything so stupid in my life…" Sam muttered darkly. Unfortunately, Will heard him and gave him a THWACK upside the head.
Doctors soon came in and instructed Rachel to push. Already exhausted, she wailed that she couldn't.
"Yes, you can," Kurt encouraged her. "And here, take my hand before you break Blaine's fingers."
"If I ever get out of this, I'm going to break more than your fingers," she swore, glaring up at the two men. "I'm going to break those parts that got me into this predicament in the first place."
Blaine, who seemed to be the only one to understand that Rachel was saying these things due to being in labor, didn't miss a beat. "Fine. You can break us later. Right now, you have to push."
Hours later, the baby finally arrived: a little boy. Kurt and Blaine had insane grins on their faces. As soon as the doctors had prepared him, Kurt snatched him away and the gay dads ran out to show off their child to the whole hospital. The others, meanwhile, just stood there, most of them with their mouths open. Rachel looked like something between flabbergasted and wanting to punch a wall. She had only carried that baby for 9 months and given birth to it! And she did not even get a chance to hold it?! Jesse seemed to be thinking similar thoughts.
"How do you like that?" he said angrily. "I'm going to have a serious talk with those two…" He made to leave the room, but Will stopped him.
"Don't let your emotions get the better of you. I'll talk to them." He left. Through the glass windows, the others could see Blaine and Kurt flitting throughout the hospital, and then Will approaching and speaking to them. Though no one could make out what he was saying, in a matter of minutes, Kurt looked like he was going to cry. The three men returned, with Kurt indeed teary.
"Rachel, we're so sorry! We were just so excited to hold him that we didn't stop to think about you!"
Rachel smiled in understanding. "It's ok. Can I please hold my baby now…I mean your baby?" she quickly corrected herself. That was the awkward thing about being a surrogate mother: once the baby was born, she could not stake any real claim on the child. Kurt passed the baby to Rachel, who fawned all over him. She was instantly in love with the child that carried some of her better features mixed in with others of Blaine.
"What are you going to name him?" Rachel looked up, surprised. She had not researched any names during her pregnancy, as she had assumed that Kurt and Blaine would want to name it. Blaine smiled at her. "Hey, we get to raise him. I say that you carrying, giving birth to, and naming him about makes it even, wouldn't you?"
Rachel smiled, touched. And looking between Kurt and Blaine, she suddenly had a flash of inspiration. She knew exactly what to call the baby.
"Finn. Finn Hudson Anderson-Hummel." Kurt burst into tears again at the naming of his child after his dead stepbrother and started to race back out of the room, only to run right into Sam, who held him in place.
"Oh no you don't." Sam said, trying to remain stoic even as his voice cracked from similar emotions. There was not a dry eye in the room, not even Jesse, who knew that his wife still held a special place in her heart for her fallen first love. The name made sense, in a way. It had the last name of the father, and was named after a relative of the other father.
Later that same night, Rachel was alone in her room. She had just rocked little Finn to sleep with a lullaby, and was about to nod off herself. As she nestled into the pillows, she thought she heard someone call her name.
Rachel…Rachel….
Rachel started and looked around, her pulse racing. With the hand not holding her baby, she groped for the nearest object in reach - an empty bottle of medication that had numbed the pain during her delivery – and held it up.
"Who's there?"
Then, once more, she heard it – a voice she thought she would never hear again; a voice that, in this moment in time, swelled her heart.
Rachel…Rachel…
"Finn?"
Rachel looked away toward the nightstand, considering turning on the light. When she chanced a look back, she almost screamed.
Finn Hudson was standing in front of her bed, seemingly in the flesh. Her blood ran cold.
"F-finn?" she croaked out. Her dead ex-fiancé and first true love gave her his signature grin.
"Hey, Rache."
"Are….are you a ghost?"
"What do you think?"
Rachel nodded mutely, as Finn strode over to the left of her bed. He was peering down at the child in her arms.
"So…Lord and Lady Hummel finally reached the 'baby-in-a-baby-carriage' stage, huh?" deploying the sarcastic titles Santana had given Blaine and Kurt once upon a time. The amusement was practically dripping from his voice, but it was not a malicious amusement – no, it was a genuinely happy amusement that sometimes masks true emotion.
Rachel smiled, the shock of seeing her old lover's ghost wearing off. "He's your step-nephew. Technically, anyway."
Finn shot her a smirk. "And his name's Finn?"
Rachel nodded more enthusiastically and she looked down at baby Finn lovingly. "He'll have to do a lot to live up to his namesake."
"No, he won't." The smile was gone from Finn's face now. "All he's gotta do is not stick any needles in his arm and that'll put him light-years ahead of me!"
Rachel stared at him, shocked. "That's not true, Finn!" she said forcefully, though she wanted to cry. "He'll have to sing just as well as you could, and throw a football to boot – not an easy combination. He'll need to have a good heart, and courage, and show fierce loyalty for his loved ones." Tears began to fall now, and her voice cracked. "In my book, that is a lot. You did a lot of good things in your life, and touched a lot of people – not least of all me! Don't let one mistake define your entire life –we didn't, in remembering you!"
Finn turned back to her, shocked. Then, he suddenly strode over and kissed Rachel on the mouth.
Rachel had nearly forgotten what Finn's lips tasted like, but her happiness at reclaiming that sensory memory made her almost forget that she was technically kissing a ghost. They broke apart at last.
"God, I've missed you," Finn got out, meaning every word. Then, the intense moment was punctured by his grin. "Don't tell Jesse I did that."
Rachel laughed and smiled adoringly at him. "Never." A thought struck her. "You've been watching over me, haven't you?"
Finn nodded. "Since the day I di - since I left. And I promise that I'll watch over your boy just as much, if not more….I have to go, but know that I'm with you. Always. I love you, Rachel."
Rachel started to cry again. "I love you too, Finn." Finn's image shimmered before fading away. Rachel silently wished him farewell, before falling asleep, exhausted.
"Wake up, my little star…" Another voice was calling for her, and Rachel almost said Finn's name, but refrained. Slowly, she awoke to see a surprising face.
"Mom?"
Shelby Corcoran smiled down at her. "Well, who the hell were you expecting? Sue Sylvester?" Rachel almost laughed. Her eyes finally found her adopted sister, Beth, and she greeted the little girl warmly before showing her baby Finn. Then, she noticed she had other visitors.
"Burt? Carol? What are you doing here?"
Mr. Hummel, Kurt's dad, smiled as he leaned against the wall. "Did you honestly think we wouldn't come to see our grandson?"
"No…I just figured you would wait until he was home with Kurt and Blaine."
"Of course not, sweetie!" Mrs. Hudson-Hummel, Finn's mom, dismissed as she came up to hug Rachel. "You gave birth to my grandchild. You're family now!"
Burt nodded in agreement. "As good as family!" he echoed.
Rachel's eyes filled with tears for probably the third time in less than twelve hours. Seeing Finn's mom made her desperately want to reveal that she had been visited by her son's spirit, but she figured no one would believe her. Burt now swaggered over to his wife; the pride was practically radiating off him.
"So, what's my grandson's name, huh?"
Rachel looked from one to the other. "You mean Kurt and Blaine didn't tell you?" Both adults shook their heads. A lump rose in Rachel's throat before she finally got out. "His name's Finn. Finn Hudson Anderson-Hummel."
Carol gasped, her hands going to her mouth; she choked on the sob that managed to escape. Burt was practically twitching as he tried to hold back the whirlwind of sadness that threatened to invade. Even Shelby looked a little teary – and she hadn't even known the old Finn that well.
"That's…that's beautiful!" Carol finally managed to utter. Burt nodded, tears in his eyes. He leaned over and kissed Rachel's forehead.
"Thank you."
Rachel blinked. "For what?"
"For giving us something to remember Finn by. For being good to my step-son. Supporting my son…and my son-in-law. Thank you for everything."
Tears fell freely from Rachel's eyes now. "You're welcome."
A few days later, Rachel was still resting in the hospital with little Finn, when the doctor came in to report that the baby was now healthy enough to be taken home. Kurt and Blaine arrived soon after, armed with a booster seat and other childcare items.
"Time to take you home, little guy!" Kurt squealed. Blaine suddenly elbowed him in the arm.
Rachel looked visibly tormented as much as she was emotionally. She seemed to not want to let the baby go. She looked to Jesse, who squeezed her hand in support. Rachel looked down at little Finn and kissed his forehead.
"Goodbye," she got out through the lump in her throat. "I love you." She then did the hardest thing she ever had to do by passing the baby off to Kurt. Kurt happily thanked Rachel for everything and left to get in the car with baby Finn. Blaine followed, but stopped halfway down the hall. He looked back to see Rachel sobbing into Jesse's shoulder. His head whipped back to his husband heading out the automatic doors. Now, it was his turn to feel emotionally tortured. He had always told himself that the arrangement was a good thing. But, was it worse since the surrogate was someone he and Kurt knew and cared about? Blaine could only feel badly when he considered what Shelby Corcoran must have felt, surrendering her child to two strangers, when Rachel was born. After a period of indecision, he returned to the room.
"Hey, Rachel…" he began quietly. She paused in her crying, and looked up. "This doesn't have to be like what happened with your two dads and Shelby. I, for one, want you to be in Finn's life. Jesse, too. I think Kurt would agree, even if he hasn't been the most sensitive these past couple days; he's just over the moon with excitement. That is why…" he exhaled. "I am considering making you Finny's guardian if something should happen to Kurt and me."
Rachel looked stunned. Then, she smiled through her tears, started bawling again and nodded. Blaine looked emotional too, so he bid a hasty goodbye before all but running out of the hospital. Things would still be great - it would just be a little time before everyone could appreciate it.