So as I've said before I've been really depressed lately, but I'm seeing a therapist and taking some different medications. As rude as it is to ask though, reviews are one way of making me feel worthwhile and as I said on the author note, not seeing any for a couple of my fics was a trigger that led to self harm. Sorry if that is a trigger for others.

Chapter Six

Friends

Kurt stared straight ahead of the screen, he quickly brought his right hand over his left wrist to calm himself. No, there was nothing that could calm him from witnessing this younger version of the person he loved in this state. He felt guilty, he could have made Blaine feel better just by coming to his house and defending him. The older Blaine had suffered this abuse as a child though and he hadn't even let Kurt be aware of this secret.

Maybe it was too painful for Blaine to even talk to him about.

"Blaine?" Kurt asked, bringing a shaking hand to his mouth, "Blaine are you okay?"

Blaine shook his head as Kurt noticed the cuts and realized that though the stuttering had been bad it was probably harder for Blaine to talk to him right now. Kurt imagined that Blaine hadn't ever let someone else witness this abuse. Otherwise he'd be put in the foster care system. Abusing a minor was never okay, but Blaine seemed to want to defend his father and as much as Kurt absolutely hated doing so, he knew he had to respect Blaine's wishes if he ever wanted to be close to him.

"Can you tell me what happened?" Kurt asked again, trying to coat the worry in his voice with something that sounded comforting. It failed.

Blaine closed his eyes, a few tears approaching as he shook his head again, he finally opened his mouth and choked out, "I-I-I c-c-ca-a-n-n-n't-t"

Kurt took a deep breath in, okay, he had to calm down and realize that in the state Blaine was in now he had to use other methods. He didn't want to force the other teenager to speak to him when he obviously couldn't. As he noticed Blaine flinch again, Kurt reached out a hand wanting to touch him, but he couldn't. You couldn't touch someone on the other side of a computer connection.

"Can we IM?" he finally asked as Blaine nodded quickly. "Okay, I'm going to end this call," Kurt told him as Blaine nodded again and Kurt ended the call.

He opened a chat window and managed to choose Blaine's name as to the person to communicate with, he wanted to be soft and gentle, but seeing Blaine like that made him so so sad.

Blaine Anderson has entered chat

K: Hey, thanks for agreeing to talk to me
B: it's okay
K: and I'm sorry if I made you feel uncomfortable
B: oh, it's okay

K: I care Blaine, but I'll keep quiet and help in other ways if you prefer

B: Yes,

—-
Okay so Kurt wouldn't report Mr Anderson as much as he wanted to, he wanted to respect Blaine's wishes but he didn't know how he could really help. Maybe if he spent more time with Blaine, Blaine would start feeling better and be distracted from the life he had, maybe if he found out what this Blaine liked then he could plan some activities that would prove to the younger male that he wanted to be his friend, right now, more than anything, it seemed that Blaine needed a friend.

Even though Kurt would always love his future fiancee, he didn't want to scare Blaine off especially since he was in this fragile state.

—

K: It was your dad right?
B: It wasn't his fault. I…I came home later than he was expecting

K: Your dad works from home?
B: No, he…he had a bad deal at work so he…he went to a bar and came home
K: I'm sorry

B: Please don't say that. Please?
K: I'm trying to sympathize with you
B: Please Please Please don't say that. It was my fault, mine, I just…don't want to shame you

—-
Kurt blinked, did Blaine really say he was worried to make Kurt ashamed of him. Kurt shook his head, a few tears running down his cheeks. Blaine was feeling so much guilt and pain and Kurt couldn't even comfort him because of just how emotionally damaged he was. Kurt remembered a very important conversation he had had with Blaine, one that had taken place after West Side Story when Blaine was trying to perfect his dance moves.

Tonight, on that stage, I was so proud to be with you.
Good. I want you to be.

This Blaine, pre-Warbler Blaine definitely didn't feel proud of himself and Kurt realized how much Blaine must have been blaming him even as a young child. The fact that Kurt had shown Blaine how much he mattered in Kurt's life, the way that Kurt said such meaningful words without even realizing them, somehow it made him feel healed inside. It made him feel as if he had really been the person to save Blaine as much as Blaine had saved him.

—-

K: I have to disagree but I won't pressure you

B: You don't understand
K: Maybe not. Do you want to talk about something else?
B: Yes

—-
Okay, so Kurt had a chance to give Blaine a comforting conversation, maybe some suggestions about how Blaine might be able to improve his life. He wanted to think about all of the little things that Blaine enjoyed. Maybe he hadn't started with some of his hobbies, maybe singing, and Kurt could bring that to him. He knew enough about Blaine to know what made him happy.

—-

K: What is your favorite animal?
K: Sorry for such a dumb question
B: It's not dumb…umm…I guess I like dogs best
K: No offense but you kind of looked like a puppy today
B: ?

—-
Okay, so of course Blaine wouldn't understand how much Kurt liked to joke about his partner's puppy dog eyes, they hadn't had those conversations yet. Maybe he had messed up, maybe Blaine would take that the wrong way. Kurt hoped not.

—-

K: You just…reminded me of one, weird right?
B: no
K: So, what do you think about birds?

—-

Kurt knew there was a bird sanctuary nearby and he also knew that Blaine always liked birds, he knew that it meant so much more than the fact that Kurt had actually sung 'Blackbird' when Blaine had realized how much he loved him…or at least was attracted to him. Even though Blaine hadn't had that experience, maybe even at this time Blaine liked birds.

I don't know if it's all this bird talk but I'm feeling turned on right now
Let's go inside
—

B: i don't know, I like the way they fly but I haven't paid much attention to them
K: Oh,

B: why? are you thinking of getting a bird?
K: no, that wasn't what I was thinking. I was thinking there's a bird sanctuary nearby and I think it'd be nice to go with another person and I don't have many friends
B: that sounds nice, I'd like to…uh…but my father
K: does he have to find out?
B: no, he's on a business trip Sunday through Wednesday, umm…would that be okay?
K: Sunday sounds perfect
B: =D
B: I'm excited, I haven't had a friend before…well not for many years
K: I'm looking forward to it as well. You seem a good friend to have.

B: thanks, but i hear my dad downstairs. I'll contact you soon

K: thanks Blaine, talk to you later?
B: umm…tomorrow? I'll contact you
K: sure, talk to you later
B: you too

—
As Blaine signed off Kurt felt a lot of mixed emotions. He wanted to protect Blaine, but maybe a trip to a bird sanctuary would be a good place to start for the happiness for the boy he still loves. He took a deep breath before whispering, "I love you Blaine, I love you and I always will."